Hello everyone I am sharing my story all the way from the United States, California to be exact. This is my first time ever posting anything on Reddit or about my long distance relationship ever so bare with me.
First off, I am making this post because I would love to hear some opinions or ideas or suggestions because currently I am a little lost with the path life has taken me this past year. I met this amazing human being (my girlfriend) a little less than 6 years ago we had became friends over instagram and FaceTime calling. Many many years of hours long phone calls and getting to know one another day by day week by week year by year practically grew up together ( we are both in our early 20’s) as time went on as we grew older we practically went different paths. She is what we call Dutch to the bone haha she is free spirited, very stubborn, very opinionated, a big time party girl, and if a matters very very attractive young lady. I on the other hand am a very chill, boring, very disciplined and hardworking ( she will say I have an ants mentality) which is true. Anyways as we got older these things really separated us and almost became a reason we weren’t friends anymore. To give context I work and save money spend time with my family and drink with my family. I do not see the fun in using drug getting fucked up and wasting literally any money given to me. So me being me I would always criticize her actions at her worst (she would be calling me crying with horrible stories due to her drug use and drinking nights) lots of manipulation and scary moments for her. and all this time I could only suggest her to do better and care more for her future but as anyone’s knows we say you can lead a horse to water but can’t make them drink. Basically at some point my frustration and feeling sorry for her turned into disgust. We both basically stopped contacting because our conversations went from the best feeling ever to arguing always.
Then last year maybe 6 months after coming out of my previous relationship she reached out and told me she wanted to come visit America. I was totally torn on what to say or do mainly because we had always dreamt of this idea but this time we were older and both had the finances to do so. Obviously being someone who has never left my country or taken any major chances I couldn’t really believe someone else would do that especially not for me. After lots of thinking I agreed to let her come visit keep in mind we had never even met, I live on my own so if it didn’t go well the first time meeting she still had to stay with me because she couldn’t afford a hotel for 2 weeks. Anyways I have more to say but can’t write it all in one post. So she made the big move and actually came to see me. It goes well actually extremely well we hit it off and she was star struck she was in disbelief to feel my skin smell me touch my hair hear my voice as was I. This first trip I wanted to make it worthwhile so we did a vacation like no other. I took her to Hollywood, San Francisco, Fort Bragg, Sacramento, and a couple day trip places like rivers and hiking spots local to me. We spent over 50 hrs driving and maybe 2 hrs of those listening to music the rest was those amazing conversations we used to have. As you could imagine we had many topics, discussions, disagreements, and fantasies to talk about (I’d say we are both mind explorers). With that being said on the day of our San Francisco I built the courage to tell her I felt more than attractive or lust for her. “ this is going to be very off topic you don’t need to feel the same or agree I just want to get it off my chest but let me explain myself first please don’t interrupt me” is how I started off my conversation/confession. After maybe 25 minutes of explaining all that I feel about her our journey together life as a whole she just say there really appreciating what I had to say about her. She honestly didn’t say much but for some reason it did really bother me not to be cocky but I could tell she felt the same way just more challenging for her to accept and act on what I said to her. We went on with our day and spent hours all over the city. When the sunset I took her to this famous spot only California locals know. This is the big moment she began crying in my arms at first I had no idea why I was asking “ are you okay ? Did I do something wrong? Do you miss home? I told her you won’t hurt my feelings if you don’t feel the same we are adults and choose our own paths” she simply replied this is the moment I leave the old me behind I want to be the best partner for you and for us. I think the tears were her way of letting go of the pain and guilt I had tried to save her from for all our years knowing eachother. I was in denial the first hour. The hours after that were spent driving back home talking about how to make this whole situation work together and explaining our boundaries and needs as partners. To speed things up she has an amazing rest of her vacation we have the saddest day before her going home, yet still promises me to keep all her promises even from 5,000 miles away. In that moment it’s the only time in my life I truly believed in another persons promise.
She goes back home and did in fact stopped parting, clubbing, using drugs, smoking cigarettes, staying at guys houses, even deleted most people from her social media to eliminate any temptations. And keeps me updated when she does go out for dinner and drinks such as when she left home and when she is on her way back home. And what I’m happiest about is she started saving her money. But definitely most proud of her showing her commitment to us as a couple as best friends as partners. 6 months go by and she comes back this time meets my entire family, friends, comes to my workplace, basically our goal was to see what my life is actually like not the fairytale version she experienced the first time around. Everything again went extremely well better than I could’ve asked. My family loves her as much as I do we joke maybe even more than I do at times.
So with all this background information (If curious about anything else be my guest and ask) the whole reason I am posting this is because lately I think the long distance with the amount of love we have built up for eachother is starting to be frustrating for both of us. She is supposed to finish her schooling in 5 months and attempt to continue nursing school by early next year if everything goes smooth with her applications (of all types) i on the other hand have the money and support to move with her basically at any time after my applications are approved. We both are kind of in this sad hole being apart from eachother. We are constantly looking at the positives and negatives of either choice but both being in our 20s we don’t honestly know what would be best for our future. We agree I have much more stability here in America because I have own place , a good job, my own car, a big supportive family, and my weekly routine is a lot more structured. There is a part of me though that is attracted to the stories she tells of the Dutch being care free, people who slow down and enjoy there days, healthy for most part, and don’t revolve life around work.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story and can’t wait to see what you all think. From one dream chaser to the next have an amazing day and don’t forget how big the world really is and it’s all yours.

Ahh, dear reader, hello there! So lovely to see you once more... well figuratively speaking that is… or is it?
After all, I am exceedingly well versed in The Arts. Maybe I am watching you at this very moment, with Clairvoyance or perhaps a Scrying Spell or maybe an enchanted object like the good old fashioned Crystal Ball? The Magus has one you know…
Just teasing… or am I? …teeheehee…
Anyway, this latest instalment comes to you courtesy via a Voice to Text application my Magus recently acquired for me, as he said listening to me speak aloud while typing is too distracting for him. I find that interesting considering his immense mental discipline yet understandable at the same time. After all, extoling ones inner monolog to an uncaring audience would be tedious to experience. Hmm… I’ve just thought of a new torture for the souls of the dammed, specifically for writers who think they are better than everyone around them. How ingenious of me!
In any case, I would prefer to distract him in other ways, mark you.
I also must say what wonderfully inventive creatures you humans are! An application of mathematical code, the base language of reality. It is very much like a spell in its function and nature I would say, that it allows my phone, yes the Magus got me one, to record all I say and transcribes it into neatly typed words on its electronic pages. It’s like having a monk-scribe in your pocket! Unquestionably wonderful!
So as I relax in my fabulously hot, luxurious scented, oiled bubble bath, I can easily regale you with further tales of the adventures I have had thus far on this wonderous blue and brown spherical rock that is third in line from our star. And I do not have to type with two fingers either, which is a massive bonus let me tell you!
If memory serves… ahh yes, we had just returned to the car where I saw a sign of my Magus’s humour on display in the form of his licence plate.
I do have to admit dear reader, I was indeed highly amused. He knows he’s going to hell, he just insists that it be on his terms! I love it! Such confidence, such audacious willpower.
That is exceedingly… stimulating for Succubi.
Ok dammit, it makes me tremendously horny, and I’m not talking about the ones on my head either you know! We are incredibly lusty beings, us Succubi, after all.
I was already in a highly ‘excited’ state when we got to the car, so much so that I had to use my Cell Adjustment Psionic discipline to tremendously dull down my inflamed senses as I did not wish to leave the tell-tale mark of my inflamed passion on the lower back portion of my new dress and also not on the car-seat when I sat back down in the vehicle.
Ahem…
After a few moments, which caused the Magus to glance up at me with a slightly puzzled expression, of standing outside the car (he had no idea nor cared… hmmph!) I opened the door and folded myself back inside the vehicle and resumed my seat. I later learned that I could have mostly avoided this… embarrassment… by actually wearing what you call absorbent lined underwear! I wasn’t wearing panties at the time as I was totally unaware of their existence. I do so now as its much more comfortable in lots of ways and in addition, stops the shiver when an errant chill wind blows unexpectedly up your gusset!
Moving on…
Getting into the car, the Magus paused until I had done up my seatbelt before starting the engine, waiting for another car to pass us by before safely pulling out and sedately driving off. I later learned that we could have gone screaming down the road in a cloud of burning rubber if the Magus was of a mind to. I would have if given the opportunity! Something to look forward to dear reader.
Instead, we drifted slowly through the placidly moving traffic as I watched the sun descend below the horizon of the ocean. I had only been back here on Earth for a few hours but every second was total bliss. I do not think that most of you humans realize how good you have it here. Even those who do not reside in the more developed and advanced nations, being on Earth is special.
There are infinity more worse places you can be, let me assure you of that.
We drove back mostly the way had travelled to this particular beach. This time though it was much later in the day, heading in the opposite direction, I became aware of many more things that had escaped my attention earlier on.
We passed by denser zones and clusters of buildings where I could see various shops, food outlets, restaurants and varying vendors, all brightly lit up now as the daylight was fading. I saw incredibly tall metal poles with blazing, glowing lights illuminating the surrounds with a warm yellowy orange glow making it still easy to see. Electric lighting will never cease to amaze me. Yes dear reader, I can experience a sense of wonder and joy at simple things, even beyond the act of slaughter and soul draining. Would it astonish you that I like flowers? Such strange lifeforms that had developed aromas they use as a method of propagation. Delightful.
Anyway… we shortly crested the hill that we had previous ascended westwards earlier on the way to the beach and I then saw it!
I was awestruck once again.
A towering edifices, glittering, shining buildings monstrously higher than Hagia Sophia was, the most immense human made structure in the world when I was last in it. These glistening towers of glass, metal and stone made that church look like a feeble children’s toy. I could see over a dozen of these buildings of varying size, clustered together in less than a square mile.
The Magus glanced to his left and saw me gaping at them.
“They’re called Sky Scrappers Meridiana. They’re generally office buildings, places of business where people daily work in their wage-slave jobs then go home at night. The buildings are left vacant but light up at night as you can clearly see.”
I turned and gawped at him.
“They’re empty at night?”
I could not comprehend why such space, that had amazing views, would be left empty of an evening?
“Yep. Well most of them are. There will be some that still have people in them, conducting various types of business overnight because its what they do for a living.”
“What do they do?” I asked in a murmur as I turned back to see the vista be obscured by a large set of commercial and residential buildings that we were currently passing.
The Magus shrugged.
“They’ll be doing all sorts of things, financial trading, working back late to do their jobs… various affairs of commerce and such. It’s not that important really Meridiana. I’ll take you into the city another day when we have time for you to be a tourist. Now, if I may, I want to know more about your Telekinesis. I got an idea of how much you can lift, probably over 1400 kilograms at least if my guess as to how much a warhorse in armour with a rider would weigh… maybe more? Probably more but we’ll test that later. Anyway, it’s your fine control skills I’m interested in.”
I turned back to the Magus who was looking ahead, driving us through the busy traffic that had become a factor. I later learned that it was a time of day called ‘rush hour’.
“I am capable of very delicate manipulation with my Telekinesis, especially in regards to the erotic arts,” I said to him with a husky, low, salacious purr.
“That’s cute but I really want to know if you could snatch out of the air and control a very small, fast moving bouncing ball, say the size of your thumbnail?” he asked in an offhand manner as he slowed down due to the traffic which was banking up in front of us.
I inwardly sighed once more. Such a challenge he was!
“Yes I can but why?”
He briefly turned to me and broadly grinned before returning his attention to driving.
“There’s a game that we will ‘play’ after dinner. It is called Roulette. The game features a spinning wheel with thirty seven little slots. Into the spinning wheel a little white ball is spun in and circles around, eventually slowing and bouncing into once of the numbered slots. The slots are alternately coloured red or black and all are numbered from 00 to 36. You can bet where the ball will land, either in red or black and specifically in a numbered slot. If the ball lands in a slot you bet on, you get a payout of thirty seven to one. Ever dollar you bet wins you 37 back. You can also just bet on which colour the ball will land in giving you your money back plus it’s value as a reward. Bet $100, you get your $100 back plus another $100.”
“Dollar... that’s money right?” I said as the implications slowly dawned on me. You could make a fortune from this!
“Yes Meridiana. Dollars are what we use as currency these days. Gold is still used but not in the way you were used to. It’s still valuable as are other precious metals but that’s going to take a long explanation which is a distraction for now. So, do you think you could perhaps catch the bouncing ball with your power, directing it into the number we bet on?”
I thought about it for a few moments.
“I will have to see how the ball moves but I think I could, yes.”
“Excellent. You stand to make us a lot of money tonight. There are other games like card games, slot machines which I’m uncertain that your powers would be able to mess with. Roulette is our hunting ground. We must be careful though.”
“Why?”
I was surprised by his tone of caution. We were power incarnate! What could possibly touch us?
“Casinos hate losing money. Roulette is going to be the hardest one they can prove that we’re cheating on if you use your Telekinesis. We will be closely watched the entire time we are in the casino. There are devices called cameras, similar to Crystal Balls, that observe everything they see, relaying the images back to people in other rooms whose task it is to spot potential cheaters in the casino. They also have people walking the floor, disguised as ordinary folk, always watching everyone else. And I want to avoid the eyes of any infernal beings who may be in the casino.”
“Ahh… I see… a healthy paranoia then, for them and us hmm?”
He nodded once, emphatically.
If you have a fortune, you need to protect it, especially from people like me. His caution in regards to our identity was also most prudent and he was correct that there was a possibility that there may be others of my ilk lurking in the shadows, walking in human form as we often do.
I have to confess dear reader, that I am a master thief as well as an expert assassin, in addition to being an accomplished warrior although I rarely fight in hand to hand combat, preferring seduction, subterfuge and skulduggery as my main methods of killing. Yet still, I can fight and kill extremely proficiently with many weapons, being skilled at one of the highest levels of melee combat, the use of weapons and ways of fighting with them. I’ve been around a while you know? You pick up on things like that if you wish to live as long as I have.
Besides… stabby, stabby, stabby, bash, slash and smite can be loads of fun when you’re doing the stabbing and bashing with a well-balanced blade or mace in your hands. But I digress…
“You have it Meridiana. Yes the casinos’ management are extremely paranoid. We will have to alter our appearance as well before we enter the casino. I shall use a minor low level spell while you can take a new face. We will do so after dinner.”
I nodded then a thought came to me. I asked,
“You said we were going to something called a buffet? I know what the word means as my abilities allow me to understand any spoken language, much like the enchantment known as Tongues. Yet I’m finding it hard to match the word with the concept.”
The Magus raised an eyebrow in interest at this revelation.
“Oh right. Just because you know a word doesn’t mean you automatically understanding it conceptually and in context either. Good to know. Well, a buffet is an enormous array of various foods, hot and cold, sweet to savoury, where you merely help yourself and consume as much as you wish. You pay for the privilege of course.”
“Truly? How much will this cost you?” I inquired wide eyed.
I noticed that we had moved through the traffic and had turned down a descending road and were now going into a massive concrete tunnel along with hundreds of other cars, all slowly moving in the same direction. It was quite honestly astounding that everyone was not smashing into one another. All the drivers were…well mostly were, attentive to their immediate surrounds and situation as we gradually merged our car into the main lane of traffic which was making its way under the earth via the huge yawning tunnel ahead.
Such staggering feats of engineering and construction which would have made the Emperor Justinian weep copious, bitter tears of pure envy. Oh how I wished I could make him see this and realise his idiotic boast was pointless when he finished Hagia Sophia. He bragged that he had surpassed Solomon himself with his church. He had but it wasn’t worth it. Justinian nearly bankrupted the Eastern Roman Empire, all for a useless church and his own vanity.
Moron.
Still, I shouldn’t care, his hubris ended up sending him to hell anyway so... yay! His actions also exacerbated the effects of the famine and plague that swept the through the empire and western Europe in the year 535 with his stupid desire to re-unify the Roman empire under his rule. You will be please to know dear reader, that he is burning in eternal torment for his multitude of sins so it is all good. My thoughts of deceased, vainglorious emperors and their fate was interrupted as the Magus spoke again,
“Hmm? … it should set us back about $80 each I’d should say? A small price to pay in all honesty when you see what is on offer. Drinks will be on top of that price, unless you just have plain water but tonight Meridiana, I shall introduce you to Champagne, one of humanities greatest achievements.”
This was enticing to hear!
“If you say so Magus. I completely believe you as you will not be lying to me,” I said, nodding and trying to think about Champagne.
So many new concepts were entering my mind, it was hard to keep my mind and thoughts in order. I understood that Champagne was a special type of wine, one which had a fizz embodied within it, making it highly regarded but that’s all I could deduce for now.
Also… I had a thought: the Magus could and would never lie to me. The feeling I had earlier, in being able to trust everything he said to me because of the oath he gave to me, was an unfettering sensation.
All my existence I have dealt with bare faced lairs, deceivers, misshapers of the truth who twisted words to suit their own selfish ends. With the Magus, all I had to be concerned with was his agenda, which actually had my interests aligned with his own. Truly remarkable.
I needed that champagne now!
We emerged from the tunnel, traveling with the traffic over wide dark river, again on another immense concrete bridge this time. There was a gigantic colosseum off to our right, all lit up with multiple coloured lights that ran around the circumference of the structure. It was like a it was enveloped in a rainbow. Frankly, it was amazing to behold.
Beyond that, I could see many more large towers and structures, lining the sides of the vast road we were hurtling along now. The Magus had increased our speed as traffic had thinned out. Never in my life had I moved so fast, well unless I was using a Haste spell to briefly increase my physical speed, which I use in combat if necessary.
I barely had the sense we were travelling in the car at roughly 80kph. Such an odd experience to have for the first time. There was no rushing of wind, no press of air on my face, just comfort and air-conditioning. Marvellous!
After a few minutes later I saw our destination.
Again I was nearly stupefied by the gigantic structure. Multiple massive buildings, all surrounded by lush green, well-manicured and maintained gardens made my jaw go slack with disbelief.
“That’s Crown Casino, Towers and hotel Meridiana. I can see you are impressed. Let me just say that if you think this is amazing, wait until we go to Las Vegas…” he said as he turned the car into the driveway of the complex.
“There’s even more impressive structures than this?”
My mind boggled dear reader. It was almost too much to take in.
“Yep. My city is a small one compared to other around the globe. We will travel to them, in due course. I know you can use your powers of Dimensional Walking, moving through other planes of reality and appearing on a different part of the planet. However, there will be times when we will need to travel together conventionally. Perhaps one day, if I learn the rights spell, we will be able to avoid having to fly in an aeroplane and by-pass the utter tediousness of baggage check-ins, airport security and so on…” he muttered darkly.
“HUMANS CAN FLY!?!” I said in a loud strangled astonished voice.
The Magus chuckled with genuine amusement.
“Think back Meridiana. I said humanity has been to the moon and back. I said we can travel safely and comfortably in a machine, called an aircraft, across the planet. Some ‘planes are huge while others are not much bigger than the car. Oh, that reminds me, we will have to construct an identity for you. We will begin that process tomorrow. You are going to need a passport soon enough,” he said as he found a relatively unoccupied parking area west of the massive structures.
He saw my puzzled expression and mistook it for wondering why we had parked here.
“It’s free to park here and there are hardly any security cameras in the vicinity.”
I nodded dumbly.
“But of course Magus…”
He saw my expression as he switched off the engine. A tiny look of… sympathy appeared on his face. He spoke to me in a soft, calm, soothing tone,
“Take a breath Meridiana. Close your eyes and focus upon the stillness within the vehicle. You are safe here with me. Nothing will harm us. Just breathe and relax, let each breath calm you. With every breath you are at peace within yourself and the world around you.”
I did as he said and instantly sensed my whirling mind begin to centre itself, become still.
I may be an ancient and powerful demon dear reader, however I have been imprisoned for nigh on a thousand years and now have been released into a world that I was unable to recognise at all.
The Magus later told me I was suffering from a psychological malady called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Yes dear reader, even us demons can get mentally fucked up. I mean, compared to the average human, we’re all demented, tormented psychopaths which explains a lot about ourselves but still… even a psychopath can suffer from mental trauma. Demons can go insane.
I breathed rhythmically, each exhaling breath calming me. With one final exhalation, I opened my eyes, turned to my Magus and softly smiled at him.
“Thank you,” was all I said. I meant it.
He nodded briefly, his intensely burning eyes boring into mine, deeply searching, looking for signs of any madness that may still be lingering within. Well, there’s always the hunger for sex and mayhem, but that’s natural for me.
“Come on, you look fine now, let’s go,” he said as he got out of the car.
I followed his example, releasing my seat belt and stepping out of the car. Closing the car door behind me, walked over to the Magus then I threaded my right arm around his left as we walked off like a normal couple, casually strolling through the car park towards the casino and hotel.
I could hear the noise of all the adjacent traffic all still travelling busily along the massive road that went past the enormous complex. There was the calls of various birds I’d never heard before, the waft of scented flowering plants and the heavy aroma of moisture in the air from the nearby river. I closed my eyes for a second just to let it all wash over me as I sedately walked along with my Magus.
Soon we came to the entrance. Huge dark glass doors magically opened for us upon our arrival. To my right I could see various coloured signage, advertising the types of ‘fast food’ eateries that people could choose to dine at. They were all brightly lit and mostly clean.
It was at that moment I saw my first wretch.
A dishevelled, unkempt, shabby man sat listless outside the fast food eateries upon the low stone wall that contained a small, well-kept garden. He looked up at us as we approached, his eyes full of misery and despair.
“Got any spare change?”
“Sorry mate, no one carries cash anymore,” lied my Magus to him with a conciliatory voice, a sad but brief compassionate smile appeared briefly on his face.
The wretched man’s face became even more resigned. He nodded back in understanding, returning his fallen face back to morosely contemplating the ground at his feet.
We kept walking, leaving the broken man behind us.
I was about to congratulate the Magus in his treatment of the beggar when I had to stop as I was confronted by an incredible sight.
Before us, in the huge well-lit lobby of the building, was a huge pair of MOVING METAL STAIRCASES!
One staircase ascended while another came down from the landing some 50 feet above us. On either side were normal, marble clad stairs that some people were using. Yet many other people were on the moving metal stairs, all just taking the experience of being raised or lowered completely for granted.
“It’s just an escalator Meridiana. A simple machine that makes life a little more comfortable. Take it, go for a ride. I’m taking the stairs as I need the incidental exercise,” he said to me as he pried my clutching hands from his arm. I had been unconsciously gripping him tightly in my amazement at seeing such a machine.
The Magus walked off to the left, climbing the steps briskly while I gingerly walked forwards, watching the metal stairs endless appear and ascend upwards. The hand rail also moved in synchronicity with the metal stairs. I observed as a pair of young women, chatting intently to each other, walked past me and up to stand upon a metal stair which was part of dozens of metal stairs it seemed. I saw them be lifted by the moving stairs, rising above and away from me.
Summoning my courage, I stepped forwards onto a moving stair, wobbled slightly as I was not used to the speed which it moved, making me grab the moving banister tightly to steady myself as I rode my way upwards. I let out a small laugh as it was such a novel experience. The young women in front of me turned around at my laugh, raising their eyebrows at me as well as actually truly seeing me for the first time. Their smiles faded as I grinned back at them.
The young women could see my infinitely superior beauty on full display. They looked hesitant, now uncertain of themselves as they mistakenly believed themselves to be beautiful. They were, passible, not ugly but not worthy of a harem to be perfectly honest. I later learned dear reader that many foolish young women, especially in what you call the western world, regard themselves as queens, rating themselves ten out of ten on a scale of dazzling good looks. These sad women are delusional. I mean, if they were that beautiful, why weren’t their faces on the covers of the glossy magazines I see in various ‘supermarket’ check outs? No matter, vanity and hubris are all ways to damnation and misery. So many people sending themselves to eternal torment simply because they were raised by idiotic parents who never properly taught their children the need for humility. It’s all win-win for the pits you know…
My Magus met me at the top of the stairs, holding out his hand to me and then leading me through the vast interior of the complex.
“That’s the casino,” he indicated to our right.
Looking, I could see dozens of people making their way inside into the brightly lit and noisy interior of the casino. I caught the whiff of desperation, despair, avarice, lust, elation and a strong aroma of human urine. I wrinkled my nose in disgust. Yes, even I have some standards dear reader.
“Magus, why does it reek of piss?” I asked as we strolled by and proceeded into the most immense, glass covered atrium I have ever seen.
“Oh, you can smell that?” He looked intrigued.
I nodded with a mild look of disgust.
“Hah… interesting. Well… some gamblers get stuck on a poker machine. They sit there for hours, desperately hoping that the machine they are playing on will pay out. The poor fools stupidly believe that if they play at the machine long enough, they’ll win big. So they stay seated, ignoring to relieve their bodily urges, to the extent that they prefer to piss themselves rather than abandon the machine that is draining away their money. The poor fools are incapable of understanding that the machine is designed to rarely pay out. Every time they play, it has a simple algorithm that calculates the chance of a payout. Most machines will payout a small amount of money occasionally, thus keeping the gambler hooked in the mistaken belief that the big one is just around the corner. It rarely, if ever, is.”
I stopped, stunned at what I just heard. The Magus stopped and looked at me with a raised eyebrow.
“That’s… diabolically genius!” I stuttered as I considered the fiendish brilliance of the whole concept.
Someone had made hell on earth not only possible but also could make a fortune from it as well as breaking people’s souls and spirits in the process! The concept of dangling hope in front of a damned soul, then snatching it away was one of the oldest known tortures of hell. This was a magnificent, a culmination of the perfection of thousands upon thousands of years of the torture, all neatly packaged in a fairly simple machine designed to beggar it’s user and turn them into slaves to it. Gobsmacking was the only word I could think off that fully encapsulated the way I felt at that moment.
“Yes it is, isn’t it? I have always suspected that those machines were most likely invented by a demon. It makes perfect sense,” he said as he shrugged, then tilted his head, indicating we should proceed onwards.
I noddled dumbly as again, I had been totally overwhelmed by the latest piece of information the Magus informed of. I barely registered the hundreds of people all wandering around the massive lobby of the hotel atrium. Many were dressed finely while others, mostly men, were dressed casually. My Magus was one of them, still wearing his novelty T-shirt and hemp pants. They were clean though and his shoes, a brand known as Babuuk, made him look somehow better dressed then the other men who were similarly attired. Maybe it was just his subtle aurora of power, his sheer confidence and his towering Will that made him stand out from the mouth breathers all around us? I guess it was.
We arrived at the entrance of the restaurant and the Magus was greeted was a short Asian woman, dressed neatly in the hotels livery.
I started to realise that there were people of so many different races of humanity all around us. I had come from a time where only what was left of the Eastern Roman Empire was this diverse, and even then it was but a shadow of the heyday of the full glory that was Rome. Here were people from almost all the lands of earth, all happily co-mingling, getting on with having dinner with family and friends. Very surprising indeed.
The Asian woman at the reception counter spoke to us with a friendly smile,
“Good evening sir, madam. A table for two for you then?” she asked politely, her voice tinged with a broad accent I had not heard before. She spoke English yet I could tell that wasn’t her first language.
“Yes please,” politely replied the Magus.
This was something I did not expect. Despite his and my obvious power, he was respectful and even kind to the servants. All of them. He didn’t condescend nor sneer down at the servants of the hotel. It is still something I have difficulty reconciling. I said nothing, just observed. Oh, he has since instructed me not to call them servants, they are members of staff and will be treated with respect until they show they do not deserve it, then they are fair game. I can live with that.
“Table seventy one is ready for you both, have a lovely evening.”
She actually meant it! I could see it in her eyes, she was truly enjoying her task. She was smiling and joking with her fellow staff members, politely greeting the next people behind us with her cheerful friendly demeanour.
Astonishing.
In my prior experiences, servants and slaves were a miserable lot but then again, that was understandable. They had no choice as to their circumstances. They had to obey lest they suffer harsh punishment.
As we proceeded into the large dining room, with over a hundred tables of varying sizes, I could see off to my left where the food was.
I stopped again and stared dear reader.
I have been to banquets with Emperors and Kings, Popes and Princes, all sumptuous feasts but nothing was like what I saw before me. Dozens upon dozens of people had plates in their hands, all calmly wandering around the incredible cornucopia of varieties of food that were on display, all brightly lit up for them to simply help themselves to as much as their plate could hold.
Roasted meats, all neatly carved by expert chefs, freshly shucked oysters all seated in enormous silver ice-filled serving bowls, trays upon trays of cooked vegetables of kinds I had never seen before and… a dazzling array of sweet desserts and treats that made me almost go weak at the knees at the very sight of them.
“Come on Meridiana, you’re starting to drool,” whispered the Magus gently into my ear as he dabbed my wet lips with a soft piece of paper that he withdrew from his pants pockets.
Once again I nodded dumbly as I allowed him to escort me to our table. He even seated me, pushing me and my chair in one I had sat down. After he had taken his seat, a young man, quite a handsome one from the Indus I believed?... came over to us, again dressed in the livery of the hotel.
“Good evening, sir, madam. Would you care for something to drink?” he inquired ever so politely.
“And good evening to you sir. Yes indeed, may we please have a bottle of Verve Clicquot, two glasses and a bottle of San Pellegrino sparkling water?” he asked with a real smile to the servant… no member of staff.
“Of course sir, I shall get that for you immediately,” replied the waiter with a pleased smile at being spoken to so politely.
“Thank you,” said the Magus then he turned to me and asked,
“Do you need a moment Meridiana? I understand this might trigger you again…”
I shook my head.
“No. It is overwhelming… but in a good way Magus. I have to ask, how can a place like this provide so many people with so much food? Even in the height of the Empire, there were magnificent feasts to be sure but… you say this happens everyday, that this is just a Tuesday and not a busy night?”
He nodded.
“This is the age of abundance Meridiana. Many of us, who live in what is known as The West, have dwelt in an age of such wealth and richness that almost all here never think on their incredible luck and privilege to live in such times. They do not know that it will come to an end. Maybe that is a small mercy. All golden ages end as you well know. So I say, let them dwell in ignorant bliss for now. We can enjoy it while it lasts.”
“Huh? Why do you believe that your golden age will end Magus?”
“It’s a long explanation and one I do not wish to go into detail here and now Meridiana but later, I will share my thoughts with you on this. Ahh, here comes our champagne.”
The waiter and another staff member had returned, with one carrying two bottles while the other had a metal bucket partially filled with ice. The waiter from the Indus placed both bottles on our table, displayed the label to the Magus who briefly nodded. Then, the waiter removed the cork from the bottle with an adroit twist of his writ. It made a pleasing pop and I could see a little haze of cold… smoke? lightly emanate from the neck of the bottle. He poured the brightly bubbling and fizzing wine into both our glasses, carefully making sure the foam did not overflow them. He was very good at his task.
“Thank you good sir,” said my Magus to the waiter who beamed back at him with a happy smile. He placed the bottle into the bucket of ice and withdrew, leaving us alone, amidst the crowed dinning room.
The Magus took up his glass, holding it in front of him. I mirrored him.
“Here’s to a good dinner with interesting company and later, ripping the shit out of a casino Meridiana.” He pushed his glass gently forwards, lightly clinking it against mine. I wasn’t familiar at the time with that form of salute and toast but went with it anyway, after all… when in Rome as they used to say.
“That sounds… delightful Magus. I am eager for it all.”
I then took a sip of my champagne and was transported into a realm of heavenly bliss.
It was exquisite.

So I live in Philadelphia, the city where UPenn (an Ivy League) is located and I wanted to write this because I feel like this is definitely a hidden away obscure thing that most people who don't live here or go to one of the big feeder magnet schools in Philly fully grasp. Like I'm sure most people know what a feeder school to an Ivy is and that it exists, but I really don't think people fully understand it and everything that goes on unless you are actually from here.
I go to a Philadelphia public magnet school and Im pretty sure itd be considered a feeder school to Penn. Every year, about 30-70 students go to Penn. Every year. Last year, about 50 students ended up going. In like 2016, 68 students got in. Another school in Philly with about 100 students per grade sends about 20 every year. And I want to preface this by saying everyone who got in worked really hard and is smart and deserves it. But if I'm being honest.... I don't think some people would have gotten into a 6% acceptance rate school like Penn had they not had the high school´s name and connections to Penn by living in Philly. Simply bc there would be no advantages and it would all come down to luck/competition.
Guarantees for Penn exist in Philly. Yes, not everyone gets in, but guarantees for an Ivy League are most certainly a thing here, trust me. Im writing this bc people think its a crapshoot when its really not as crapshoot-y as you might think. Not here at least.
You see, what a lot of people don't know is that Penn is REQUIRED to accept a certain number of students from Philadelphia. I think its because of some sort of agreement with Philadelphia for letting Penn use their land??? not too sure. But Penn knows the local high schools. There are a ton of connections to Penn just because its in the same city.
I know kids from my school who have gotten Cs, kids who didn't submit SAT scores because they got a 1200, kids who didn't have perfect grades and had a bunch of Bs. Kids who take a bunch of regular classes and not the most challenging schedule possible. Maybe have around 5-6 APs (which is nowhere near the greatest amount you can take at my school). Kids who have maybe 1 or 2 good ECs and then everything else on their application are just random activities or are ¨mediocre¨ by Ivy standards. For example, I know someone who was captain of two varsity sports teams, which is amazing. I also know someone who was president of a club. But that was literally all they really put on their application. And every single one of them got in.
Now don't get me wrong, I really don't want this to seem like I'm making fun of these kids for ¨not being good enough¨ or smth. They are all hardworking and smart. If you think I'm looking down on these kids, that's not what I'm saying.
What I am saying is that I know there are a ton of kids out there who took 14 APs, all As, 1560 SAT, was president of 4 clubs, had two internships, did 200 hours of community service, captain of the tennis team, and founder of a business. And they were all rejected from Penn while kids from my school with half of that and had worse grades/way less APs got in. And again, I do believe the kids from my school are smart and hardworking... but they do get an advantage being Philadelphia students.
Circling back to my bolded point, this creates this sort of weird culture/vibe when it comes to college admissions season here. Kids here know that as long as you have good grades (doesn't even have to be straight As), a few APs, president/leader of a few clubs, maybe an internship here and there, and community service... you are pretty much guaranteed for Penn. Especially if you apply ED. Every single class president from my school in the past few years has gotten into Penn, every single member of Science Olympiad, and every single Editor-in-Chief. NOW IM NOT SAYING ALL STUDENTS GET IN bc people definitely still get rejected... but while kids from other schools are saying its a crapshoot for Penn, there are some kids here where you can call them a guarantee.
Forget college admissions even. There are a ton of summer programs/dual enrollment programs at Penn that are completely free for Philly public school students ONLY while everyone else had to pay like 9,000 dollars. Penn does have internships/paid programs/research opportunities only open to School District of Philadelphia students. And ofc the people who work at Penn and are professors at Penn... their children have to go to school somewhere in Philly, right? Tons of Penn legacies/children of Penn faculty in Philly schools ofc. There are Penn scholarships only for Philly kids. You see, advantages left and right.
I write this because I see those articles that list out the schools that send the most kids to Ivys like Penn. They be like ¨Horace Mann sent 12 to Penn!¨ or ¨xyz school sent 19 kids to Penn over the past few years¨. That doesn't even come close to the amount Philly schools send but no Philly schools are mentioned in the article. I also saw smth on Quora a while back where a question was like ¨Do Philadelphia high school students have an advantage to Penn¨ and the answers were like ¨No, there are no advantages¨. That is NOT true in the slightest. This makes me wonder if this is like a hidden thing that people from Philly arent aware of. People like know feeder schools exist but arent aware of the extent of it all.

Per the title, I’m looking for advice on different tanning options for me for long term. I’m a complete novice when it’s comes to all things beauty - please help a guy out! :)
Basically I have quite pale skin and would like to try options to just add a little bit of tan/glow to my skin, but nothing extreme. I tend to avoid the sun and UV so I am looking at fake tanning options.
I absolutely need to avoid the fake / patchy look as I want it to look very natural. I am quite active / sporty so not sure anything I should be aware of to help it stay natural looking?
If I got a really light spray tan, once every week or two would that go fairly unnoticed but give me a slight glow? Are there particular spray tan options I should look for?
Other than that, would it be an option to use a gradual self tanning oil or lotion? Would a DHA option daily be a good choice just to give my facial complexion a boost? Would it looks ridiculous with the rest of my body being pale?
Only issue with self application on my body is that I would most likely mess it up!
Thank you

Long story short I applied for an area manager position via campus next, on the grounds I'm going to graduate college soon. However it's been more than a month and it's still on "under consideration" status. Does anyone happen to know how long it takes to hear back? I've tried asking HR but I've gotten nowhere. The only thing I can think of is I got a write up recently for low rate and maybe they saw that and decided to pump the brakes on my application. HR told me it's not a factor but frankly I'm not convinced of that. For the record I'm a FLEX member so I'm not there often. Also this is NOT a flex on anybody here so please do not take it that way. I'm genuinely curious on why it's taking so long to hear back on my application.

The position closed a few weeks ago on March 10th. I was wondering how long--for the people who got referred--it took to receive an email that you were referred?
There was a note that said: "The applicants who apply the day the first 300 applicants are processed by USASTAFFING will be reviewed and referred to the selecting official. Any additional candidates that apply after the first cut off will be reviewed as necessary as vacancies arise."
There were 2650 applicants but I 'm sure I was in the first 300. I applied at 2AM of the first day it opened (March 3rd). Still haven't received an email about a referral or deny. How long does it take? Thanks!

got my hips pierced for my 18th & was wondering how long i should wait for it to be safe for me to go to the beach. i tried googling but got mixed answers

this is what happened:
- I hid some information about being fired from a job in 2014 on my 1st EQIP, I made an undoable mistake with a DB but failed to report it on time (when I was asked, I did it after an hour passed), and got fired for it, but when my interviewer asked me about that info (that I did not put on my eQIP) I told her everything about it
- in 2016 I was granted secret clearance, and kept with my work, so I thought that 2014 incident was all settled.
- in 2019 I was working for another company and violated company policies regarding remote work from overseas without permission (I had to do some urgent border crossing not justified but just to explain the reason behind it) and was terminated for it, got another job and I had to file another EQIP and put all this information in there and was brutally honest about everything what happened there and all the events in 2014, then after the interview I did not heard anything from department of personell
- in early 2022 I believe I filed another eQIP and again I put all the information in there
- then around October 2022, I got a notice that I had to stand in trial because my clearance was going to be revoked, and don't remember the expression they used, if I remember well, "lack of character or judgement or even being deceitful". also not helping was the fact that my wife is a Mexican citizen and was at the time was working for the Mexican government as a security consultant.
- After the incidents of 2019, I behaved well, all my employer (4 in total including the last one I just got laid off), were happy with my work no complain.
- I lost the trial of course as you can imagine, I was grilled by the government officer, I have to admit I need to learn how to be lawyer or have mindset of one. They mentioned how I lied on my 1st eQIP application (even when I put all the right info on the next eQIPS), the incident of 2019, my wife's ties with the Mexican government and how bad my character was.
- In December last year (2022) my secret clearance was revoked, I decided not to appeal to the jury decision, then my company switched me to another non-DoD project (still government) whereby I would need the public trust clearance, just two weeks ago (March 2023), the lady from the government just denied my eligibility for public trust, (I felt she was obsessed about the events in 2014, asking so many questions, something I didn't even remember well now, she barely touched the events of 2019) and company had to let me go. Now I am in the search for a non-government job.
- Not so sure if going to trial with a sec clearance lawyer would have helped, now I am a bit disappointed with all of this, yes I did make serious mistakes, and I thought I learned my lessons and was behaving well afterwards, but my impression was that the government was/is more interested in punishment and revenge than anything else. oh well.
thanks in advance for any remarks! my main question is should I consider applying to another government job in the future? if so how long would be a good waiting period.

Vous avez du mal à mesurer votre productivité ? Découvrez ces applications qui peuvent vous aider à suivre et à améliorer vos niveaux de productivité.
Rester concentré et gérer son temps peut être un véritable défi en raison des distractions qui nous entourent. Il est facile de commencer à tergiverser et à perdre la notion du temps, pour se rendre compte que vous êtes très en retard. Une façon de contourner ce problème est de mesurer votre productivité.
Aujourd’hui, nous allons examiner quelques applications qui peuvent vous aider à faire exactement cela. Bien qu’il n’y ait pas de moyen facile de mesurer avec précision votre productivité, vous pouvez vous faire une idée approximative avec de l’aide. Des listes de tâches au suivi du temps, ces applications vous aideront à rester concentré et organisé tout au long de la journée.
https://www.astucetech.net/7-applications-pour-vous-aider-a-mesurer-la-productivite/

Are you looking to play DND in a modern setting? Do games like Resident Evil and Dead Space inspire you? How about movies like Evil Dead? If you said yes to any of these questions, do I have the game for you!
One Particularly Long Night in Los Angeles is a 6 man campaign inspired by games like Resident Evil 2 and 3, in which a powerful corporation, called the Mejor Biological, meddle in biological tinkering they definitely should not be. What results is a biological and arcane outbreak the likes of which Earth has never seen, sending the city into disarray and making the journey for safety nearly impossible. Team up with others in your apartment building to either get the hell out of dodge, or get to the source of the outbreak and find out the truth about the Bien Antigen before it spreads globally.
Player characters will start at Level 5. All printed races and classes are available, but due to the nature of the setting, all PC's will look human with access to racial features. Magic will not be introduced into the world until the start of the game, allowing you to learn about the arcane in this world alongside your character.
If all this sounds dope to you, fill out the form below! A small voice interview will take place if your application looks good, and we'll be deciding on who gets into the game after that. Trying to start with a session zero on April 11th!
https://forms.gle/PtuvzDxCKW2DHR1L9

So I'm an international student. I was applying to a college on the same day registration closes. What my deadline will be in hours by the university's time. Unfortunately that's not the case. Turns out it was local time. So can I put in the application form that I'm from California and later say it was a mistake? (It's 9 pm in clai)

I managed to get everything submitted by the deadline but I think I fucked up my final STEP proposal. I finished my final edits with about half an hour to spare to get everything done and then I assumed it was all going smoothly. On my end, everything looked fine. Then I go to download my file and the side bar comments thing kept showing up and would not go away for some reason. I tried everything I could think of but I couldn’t manage to figure it out, so I started panicking and just submitted it as is for some hope it would get accepted. I know I shouldn’t have waited until that long before the deadline, but do you think it will still get approved? How strict are they with these? My project is for this summer, so I would be in a real financial bind if I’m not approved for the grant.

I just want people to know that the Sonoma County government is corrupt. They spent 186 million dollars on a "new courthouse" that is 163k square feet, which works out to $1,100 per square foot, which is over double the second most expensive building I could find was, and over four times the average price per square foot of palaces and museums. And it's just going to look like a giant portable. This is to house some of the most corrupt people in this County, who all make $200-350+k per year (I am including their benefits in that, but not their pension). The entire DA's Office has a vendetta against Civil Rights in general, and will literally knowingly commit criminal violations of laws for the purpose of covering up serious criminal misconduct on the part of Sonoma County employees.
Lynda Hopkins took money from the law enforcement unions, and turns a willfully blind eye to it.
The County Office of Legal Counsel is literally a crime syndicate.
In 2015, the Sheriff's Office had a veritable torture ring in the jail.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izcHIv5Y4z8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYrGChrW5HM&list=TLPQMzAwMzIwMjMv0QAOPDy1Lw&index=2
This is just the tip of the iceberg. They lied about the existence of these videos, and "lost" the one where they gave one of the inmates internal bleeding, with a knee to their back.
There was a lawsuit about it. It was called the "Yard Counseling Case". There are news articles about it.
There was an official, written policy, called "Yard Counseling", later its name was changed to "Behavior Counseling" which dictated that for arbitrary punitive measures, Sheriff's Office personnel should extract inmates from their cells individually (which meant slamming their heads onto the door frames on the way out and other abuse), and isolate them, and putting them into "pain compliance" techniques (literally, by definition, torture) for extended periods of time while "counseling" them, which meant wearing no name tags, ski masks and riot gear, carrying a shotgun with them, and insulting them in explicit language for over 20 minutes.
This official written policy was acknowledged by Rob Giordano in a video, where he lies that no inmates where injured, uploaded to YouTube in 2018, when they finally addressed this official written policy, and the practice of torturing inmates without reasonable cause (leading exercise routines, for example).
In 2021, they saw one of the victims of this torture ring, who had sued them and had won, at a peaceful protest, and shot him with a grenade launcher while hiding on a rooftop in the face with a crowd control grenade, which exploded on impact and caused horrific injury that I don't care to describe.
In 2017, I was almost killed by application of a "carotid hold" / lateral vascular neck restraint, by a sheriff's deputy, for literally no reason. A knee was placed on my lower back while I was on the ground on my stomach as well, which caused a serious injury to my kidney, which was the worst injury of my life. I have also been diagnosed with an organic brain injury and cognitive impairment. I was tested for the same type of cognitive impairment before the incident and there is a marked difference, and I have about 30 pages describing the differences I've noticed / troubles I've had in my cognitive functioning. There was no probable cause to arrest me, and I was polite and compliant with all the instructions given to me, and this was confirmed by witnesses. I was punished for invoking my right to remain silent, then my arm was grabbed and yanked up behind me, and then a carotid hold was applied because my body pivoted after the deputy grabbed and yanked my arm.
This occurred UNDER A CAMERA and IN FRONT OF WITNESSES. I called the Sheriff's Office the next day said I want to "make an official complaint in writing". I was transferred to Captain of Internal Affairs, Captain Mark Essick. I repeated my request, verbatim. He responded, verbatim: "We don't do that. Why don't you tell me what happened." I did. I told him it happened right under a camera. He said "The camera can't record." I asked for confirmation. He said the cameras "Don't have recording technology installed."
I asked the County for a claim form. They ignored my request, and instructed me to report the incident to IOLERO. IOLERO requested I meet with Internal Affairs, and I said fine.
Sgt. Andy Cash called me and scheduled me for a meeting at the Sheriff's big station. I was made to walk first and guided upstairs to a meeting room, and then patted down for weapons, and the interview was recorded. For 75 minutes I was deposed about happened. He asked me repeatedly about my mental state after the incident. I admitted that I was upset after the incident, and he acted like that justified the whole incident. He explicitly promised to interview the 4 deputies who witnessed the event in addition to the 2 deputies who participated, as well as the arresting officer (who I told him would confirm that I was polite and cooperative), which he agreed "would confirm [my] demeanor", and a bystander witness I told him about.
I complained to IOLERO director Jerry Threet. Mr. Threet agreed that that was inappropriate, then resigned without reviewing the investigation.
For about 4 years review of the investigation was put on hold because IOLERO staff quit, and when more staff was hired, they complained of being understaffed. They had a budget of over a million dollars but only had 2 employees. They only reviewed one case per four months. And they put off "backlogged" cases and focused on new cases. My complaint was finally reviewed by Interim Director Garrick Byers who clearly stated that the investigation was not conducted appropriately. I have the letter from him. That still has never been made public.
After the interview with Internal Affairs, I corresponded with Lynda Hopkins, and she refused to give her opinion on the matter. I specifically complained that the carotid hold was being used recklessly, and it is a dangerous technique. This was in 2018. She forwarded me to Janell Crane, who then had me meet with Kristi Schultz.
I contacted the DA's Office and spoke to Richard Celli (who made $346k in 2017, and has gunned down two unarmed people, and was convicted by a jury in one of the civil cases brought against him by one of the victim's family, but the sentence was overturned by a judge, while working for the SRPD). The first time I spoke to Mr. Celli, he told me that another law enforcement agency should take my case. After that first time, him and the rest of the DA's Office openly refused to comply with the Victims' Rights Laws (CA Con Art. 1 S. 28), and the "policies" (which are legally binding under CA Con Art 5 S. 13) of the Attorney General stating clearly that they are to take complaints from victims if it can't be resolved with the department.
After the first talk with Mr. Celli, I called Rohnert Park Police as I was instructed, and they 3-way called the Sheriff's office and then transferred me. I spent about 30 minutes reporting the incident to a deputy, and he asked me questions in a fair manner. The incident report from the 30 minute phone call was "directed" to Andrew Cash, and was then destroyed, which is literally a state and federal crime. I called RPPD back and talked to the arresting officer and he positively clearly confirmed that I was "polite, calm, compliant, and cooperative" (or something nearly verbatim, I can't remember exactly any more).
Andrew Cash called me the next day, at precisely 7:00 AM. He told me he was driving. He was extremely confrontational with me. He said "There were 6 deputies [referring to the two who used excessive force on me, and 4 witness deputies]. You were combative." This was false. He had only interviewed one of the 4 witness deputies, and the other 3 had provided written statements. They said that they had witnessed force being used, that they had not participated in the use of force to the best of their memory, and that I "did not appear to be resisting". But again, he had promised explicitly to interview the 4 deputy witnesses, and the arresting officer, and the other witnesses (such as the bystander witness who saw the whole incident, the nurse, etc.).
Internal Affairs exonerated the officers. The letter was signed by Eddie Engram, captain of Internal Affairs at that time. I called Mr. Engram, and had an hour long conversation with him, and he told me to contact Sgt. Cash after April 1st.
I filed a federal claim on the last day that it was due.
Mr. Cash referred me to Legal Counselor, Kara Abelson.
Ms. Abelson spent a year and a half refusing to comply with the Public Records Act, the Rules of Procedure, and the Rules of Professional Conduct. She refused to provide me documents that I was entitled to under law, including the incident report written by Deputies Jacquelin Fazzio and Virgil Smith, and the recorded interviews that he promised he would conduct, and stated pretty clearly that he had conducted.
Kara Abelson spent a year and a half trying to claim that my federal complaint was time barred by 1 day when it wasn't. The judge (Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers) entertained this and forced me to respond SEVEN TIMES, before she finally admitted that the "law wouldn't allow [her] to dismiss [my] complaint".
After a year and a half, Kara Abelson finally withdrew from the case after I started citing the Rules of Professional Conduct to her that require her to resign or withdraw from the case rather than defend a civil case where defense isn't warranted. Nobody had disputed any of the allegations I had made. In fact, Eddie Engram had confirmed that what I said happened was not disputed by the evidence.
At some point around this time, either before or after Ms. Abelson withdrew, the 2 incident reports written by the two deputies, the written statements by 3 of the 4 witness deputies, and the recorded interviews with me, the 2 deputies who assaulted me, and 1 of the eye witness deputies, were provided, along with various other records from the facility. In the recorded interview, and the incident report, the deputies admitted that Virgil Smith had applied the carotid hold.
I had also reported the incident to the State Attorney General Public Inquiry Unite (Lupe Zinzin). She had told me, over and over and over, that the local DA's are required to take complaints from civilians in these situations. She refused to call the DA's Office, though. The DA's Office (Richard Celli, Mark Azzouni, David Kahl, and the anonymous receptionists who all refused to provide their names) refused to take a complaint from me. They (including the receptionists) hung up on me every time I called after no more than 2 minutes, for no reason, transferred me to dead lines, never returned any voicemails I managed to leave, told me explicitly that if I send a complaint, they will throw it away, and didn't care, at all, what the laws were. The receptionists also refuse to provide their names. The Attorney General's Office told me to send them a complaint, so I did. The DA's Office acknowledged receiving the complaint. But later said that they did not have a record of it, meaning they threw it away.
The Attorney General's Office finally agreed to take a complaint from me. It sat on their desk for a year. I finally called them, concerned that evidence was being destroyed, and left a voicemail for Casey Hallinan requesting that they request copies of the physical evidence from the Sheriff's Office. Literally 2 days after that voicemail, a letter was sent to me signed by Sharon Loughner with Casey Hallinan CC'ed on the letter, stating that they would "take no action", and blamed the incident on me. I had not received the letter though, and called and spoke to Ms. Hallinan, who was extremely rude. After that, the Attorney General's Office hang up on me as soon as they find out it's me, for no reason. There has since been a bystander witness who saw the whole thing, and it has come to light that the cameras did record, that no upgrades were ever performed like Ms. Abelson alleged, the cameras do continuously record (as of 2019), and they just lied through their teeth about the camera for 4 straight years. The Attorney General's Office does not care. They violate the laws, and do not care what the laws are.
Sonoma County Office of Legal Counsel attorney Michael King took over after Ms. Abelson withdrew. Right off the bat, Mr. King told me that my motions were deficient - a contention he has repeated frequently, since then. I asked him how. He changed the subject, and to this day has NEVER given any explanation as to how any of my motions are deficient.
He continued to claim that my claim was time barred, filing frivolous motions, in blatant violation of the rules of professional conduct, after I cited the rules to him, constituting explicit legal misconduct.
As I said, the judge finally agreed to open Discovery after a year and a half of full time work trying to fight for my right to not be nearly murdered for no reason.
Lawyers do not take these cases unless there is undeniable proof of blatant guilt, along with undeniable proof of catastrophic injury. Multiple law firms have confirmed that it takes over a million dollars worth of legal work to get these cases to trial.
The judge also promised me a pro bono attorney "if you make it past summary judgment".
The judge scheduled us for Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR) hearing with a magistrate judge. Mr. King elicited an offer from me, which I spent about 2 weeks working on, trying to make it as agreeable as possible. But then for the hearing, his written offer was to waive charging me his attorneys fees. The ADR magistrate confirmed that there was no legal basis for him to do that - it would be illegal. He had been ordered to participate in this hearing, and there was a legal obligation under the Rules of Procedure to try in good faith to settle the case. He violated the order and the rule of procedure (26 (f)).
All of my motions were completely ignored for no reason.
Mr. King / Defendant Virgil Smith lied about the cameras. They said "Denies the existence of cameras capable of recording in the vicinity", in writing, under oath. They never disputed that he put his knee on top of my back with all his weight on it.
Mr. King refused to comply with his Discovery obligations. I had to file about 4 different motions pertaining to their refusal to comply with the laws regarding disclosure of evidence.
Upon receiving an official Discovery request for records of camera equipment, I received a letter signed under oath by Mr. King (nearly 4 years after the incident) stating that the cameras CAN RECORD. But stating "tasks must be performed" to start the recording function, and stating that all records pertaining to the equipment that was installed at the time HAD BEEN DESTROYED (literally a federal and state crime, a civil tort violation, and a sanctionable act of legal misconduct).
Mr. King refused to schedule any of the witnesses for deposition, demanded MY deposition BEFORE he would even schedule the two deputies who assaulted me, even though I had been requesting depositions with other witnesses for over a month, and refused to schedule anyone else, he refused to answer interrogatories, he refused to provide copies of the policies from the time of the incident. He tried to pass off a weird spreadsheet with the word camera on it as proof that upgrades had been done to the cameras. He refused to provide complete training records for the deputies. He refused to provide details about the training. He refused to provide blueprints of the facility, refused to provide photos of the cameras at the location, refused to provide still images showing which direction the cameras were pointing, was caught lying under oath (and "penalty of perjury") multiple times, refused to provide photos of the deputies so I could schedule depositions efficiently.
The judge erroneously dismissed my Equal Protection claims, construing them as Due Process and Employment Discrimination claims, which are different types of claims than Equal Protection claims against a government actor. The government cannot arbitrarily treat anyone disparately. The Court also dismissed my "Monell" claim against the municipality for their "policies, customs, or practices", but left me leave to amend that claim. And she waited until Discovery opened over 1.5 years into litigation, to do this, forcing me to amend the complaint DURING DISCOVERY which was only open for a limited amount of time, instead of any point in the 1.5 years prior to that.
In the recorded interview with Andrew Cash and one of the witness deputies, she spontaneously states that Mr. Cash instructed her to review the written statements made by the two deputies who assaulted me prior to the interview. Another deputy witness confirmed that Mr. Cash had instructed her to review the written reports by the two deputies who assaulted me prior to her providing Mr. Cash with a written statement as well.
The judge finally retaliated against me, without rational basis, for filing motions, which I had filed because I was being illegally obstructed from preserving evidence, by withdrawing leave to amend regarding the "Monell" claim (I had stated a clear Monell claim to begin with, but the judge literally has an aversion to reading, and relies on guessing, and is biased against pro se litigants; I am summarizing well over 100 pages, if not well over double that, of motions, objections, and replies and the judge's responsive orders).
She did however, finally schedule a hearing with a Discovery referee magistrate. All my motions (and the months of work I was required to do dictated by the various rules) was completely disregarded, and both me and Mr. King were given 2 pages each (double spaced) to go over discovery issues, even though I had filed about 4 different motions about various issues, and he hadn't filed ANY, about Discovery issues, and never did.
During conference I was required to do in accordance with the Rules, Mr. King repeatedly tried to establish that I had committed crimes during the course of conferring which was my legal obligation, without having any rational basis to believe what he was trying to establish. He demanded evidence that would exist, and he kept repeating every lie he could come up with to the judge. The judge would either get annoyed at me if I addressed any of Mr. King's baseless accusations, or take his statements at face value for being 100% true.
Mr. King finally "compromised" and agreed to schedule depositions with me (as long as Mr. King wanted to) and the two deputies who had assaulted me (for 25 minutes each or something) all simultaneously, but refused to schedule anyone else, even though this was grossly advantageous to him, and in blatant violation of Rule 26 of Civil Procedure. One of the eye witness deputies later confirmed that he had "consulted" her over 4 times prior to the trial. During this deposition, Mr. King asked me where a family member of mine works. He had spent about 30-40 minutes trying to convince me that I can tell him anything, that the entire record was designated confidential, that I had nothing to worry about - and at a deposition, you are obligated to answer the questions unless they are harassing. Mr. King also requested contact information for counselors from over 10 years ago, and that was the only question I didn't answer - I told him to provide the request in writing. At some point after that, I told Mr. King to not contact my family member at her workplace, and Mr. King responded "unless you fully and completely cooperate" with his request for contact information for counselors from 10 years+ ago, he would do exactly that - harass my family member with subpoenas sent to her workplace, as I had requested he not do, without EVER REQUESTING A DEPOSITION WITH HER, just using it as leverage.
At the hearing, the Discovery Magistrate (Donna M. Ryu) discussed matters only with Mr. King, without including me. He told her that the 4 eye witness deputies "saw nothing" and "weren't there" (verbatim) trying to get her to deny me my request to take their deposition. She asked him if he would get them to sign fresh "sworn declarations", "under oath" (Judge Ryu's words, verbatim) stating this. Mr. King said yes, absolutely, he would. Judge Ryu asked me "Would that be okay?" I said "No." She started laughing, and asked me why, and I explained that I had explicitly described various interactions with them that had taken place while the carotid hold was still being applied to me, and that they had stated in their written statements that they had witnessed force being used, and that I was "not resisting". She confirmed that this was all true with Mr. King and that he already knew all of this, and ordered him to cooperate with scheduling them for deposition. Mr. King then repeated the same phrases "saw nothing", "weren't there" to Judge Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers prior to the trial.
After that, they went back to discussing matters only with eachother, and I was excluded from discussion. This was an hour long hearing, and at about the 45 minute mark, Mr. King was again lying to the magistrate judge, and when he had finished, I interjected, "That's not true". Judge Ryu shouted "Stop! Stop stop stop stop stop!" And then very assertively explained to me the importance of not interrupting people for the convenience of the court reporter / transcriber. I was excluded from the rest of the hearing.
At some point at either this hearing or the next one, I cited the legal requirement for the parties to disclose contact information for witnesses. I cited the rule of procedure. Judge Ryu responded, "Mr. King is a lawyer!" as if that alone justified his refusal to provide me contact information for EYE witnesses who saw the event. Mr. King and Ms. Abelson had also claimed that they did not have the contact information for the bystander witness (which was a lie), and refused to provide the contact information for the nurse. And when Magistrate Ryu ordered them to provide that, they only gave me the company name he used to work for.
Mr. King refused to provide both fresh written statements from the eye witness deputies as he had promised the magistrate, and to schedule them for deposition, and stated that if he provided written statements, they would be copied and pasted versions of the same statements previously provided, signed under oath (nowhere saying that they "saw nothing" or "weren't there").
Mr. King kept threatening to go to my family member's workplace unless I provided him contact information for counselors from 10+ years ago, DURING a DEPOSITION, without him providing any written request for the information.
He also interfered with scheduling the witnesses for deposition, with the Court reporter that I had hired, disregarded the schedule that I had set, and set them according to his own schedule, which raised the cost of deposition from an estimated about $700 to about $4,000, and said this was my one and only chance.
The Federal Pro Bono Project / the Justice & Diversity Center is an organization that receives seven million dollars a year in public funding and is under contract with the Federal District Court to work with the Court to provide legal consultation to pro se litigants. I had about 19 appointments with them, about 18 with Abby Herzberg, and 1 with Rosemarie Maliekel. Ms. Herzberg was precisely 15 minutes late to every single appointment, repeatedly gave me horrible advice ("just wait", do nothing, "don't file this", despite admitting that the entire motion was valid, directly causing excessive delay and the spoliation of crucial evidence). She also yelled at me aggressively on two occasions because I had brought up state laws, which were being currently violated against me, because the Court had dismissed my "state claims" because Sonoma County refused to supply with a state tort claim form when I first asked, reasoning that was not relevant to the state laws being currently violated against me. After Ms. Herzberg yelled at me the second time, I requested an appointment with Rosemarie Maliekel. Ms. Maliekel spent the entire appointment ranting at me about irrelevant issues, and kept talking over me and interrupting me. I was polite but eventually asked "can I finish what I was saying?" She responded "No!" and kept ranting at me.
I had repeatedly asked about how to properly get medical evidence, and about expert witnesses. Ms. Herzberg ignored my questions and spent nearly the entirety of almost every single appointment reading (or pretending to) through the rules, without letting me speak at all, even to summarize the relevant sections of the rules that I had read.
On a video on their webpage (on the Court's website, because they are a "partner project" with the Court), Abby Herzberg explicitly demonstrates a clear understanding of the fact that the Court provides funding for expert witnesses, despite ignoring my questions about that and spending nearly the entirety of almost every single appointment either reading rules or pretending to.
Discovery was closed.
Mr. King rehashed the legally baseless and frivolous "time barred" claim in a Motion for Summary Judgment. I was required to respond to it twice, and it was obvious Judge Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers wanted to dismiss my claim, and I was required to disprove their baseless legal claims with several tens of pages of case laws. I was required to answer all his "undisputed material facts" under threat of terminating my entire case, but he refused to answer mine. He lied over and over to the judges. As I said, the judge ruled that the laws "wouldn't allow [her] to" dismiss my entire case and rejected his Motion for Summary Judgement.
The Court ordered the Federal Pro Bono Project (FPBP) to put me on a list for attorneys seeking clients. Ms. Herzberg told me that if I filed any motions, that the FPBP would not cooperate with the Court's order, until 1 month before my trial, instead of 6 months before. She also said that a law firm had reached out to them about my case over a month prior to that, and that the staff at the FPBP had not followed up. My filing privileges were then revoked by the Court.
An attorney, David Ratner, reached out to me, and scheduled an initial consultation, over Zoom, at which he stated he "hates cops", and gave a showing of being enthusiastic. I explicitly told him that I wanted to make sure we were on the same page as far as what to "aim for". I told him that I had been working for FIVE YEARS, that I had almost died, that I had suffered two different extremely serious injuries (though I was up front about the injuries being surreptitious and that there had been major delays and flaws with medical evaluation, due to the hospitals not taking my insurance at the time, and ongoing delays because of Covid, and other reasons). I told him that what I asked for was consistent with the most similar case (the Esa Wroth case of 2013) that I knew of (an ask of three million dollars). This was coincidental. I was not aware of the Esa Wroth case when I came up with that number. I agonized over the number to ask for, and had tried SEVERAL times to resolve the case for a tiny fraction of that amount, with Kristi Shultz, with Janell Crane, with Lynda Hopkins, several times with Ms. Abelson who refused to even hear me out, and SEVERAL TIMES with Mr. King, and spent a lot of time trying to come up with a amount that would be MUTUALLY AGREEABLE, EACH TIME and described the methods I used to come up with that number in detail in court documents. Mr. Ratner explicitly agreed to aim for that at the trial. During the Zoom conference, his partner Shelley Mollineaux, showed up about 15 minutes late, stayed for about 3 minutes without saying anything, Mr. Ratner made an awkwardly flirtatious remark to her, and she left without saying anything at all.
Mr. Ratner, and Ms. Mollineaux, who was set to represent me at trial under Mr. Ratner's supervision, then both went dark for over a month. They ignored my emails, voicemails, and messages that I left with their receptionists. There was a hearing, and then Mr. Ratner emailed me demanding "all the documents" that I had. I had over 50 gb of files across thousands of files, and spent about a month working with his paralegals sending them batches of files, and providing all the information they asked me for. Mr. Ratner forwarded me an email from Mr. King where King accused me of violating a court order regarding providing medical providers and the physical addresses of my entire family and my friends, which was false -- the Court had ordered me to provide him CONTACT information, at a second hearing, which wasn't significant, and I had fully and completely complied in good faith with all the Court's orders. Mr. Ratner accused me of not sending him "anything", after I had spent at least several weeks with his paralegals sending them batches of files and information, and he simultaneously threatened to ask the judge for leave to withdraw.
There had been major delays with medical evaluation due in large part to Covid, as well as delayed discovery of brain injury, which is very common, and other factors.
With trial set, Mr. Ratner forwarded me an offer from Defendants for $5,000. Upon discussion (which was 100% in email because he refused to talk over the phone and Ms. Mollineaux completely ignored me), he accused me of not doing Discovery right. I pointed him to the video I referred to earlier, which I had found since Mr. Ratner took my case, but wasn't aware of when I was interacting with the FPBP, where the FPBP (Abby Herzberg), and various District Judges from the Court I was litigating in, state that it is general policy (and it is official policy under the Court's General Order 25) to REOPEN DISCOVERY when a pro bono attorney comes onto the case, and to FUND DEPOSITION AND EXPERT WITNESS FEES.
Mr. Ratner stated he "won't file any motions" and ultimately elected to withdraw from the case over fulfill his legal obligations under the Rules of Professional Conduct. Judge Gonzalez Rogers IGNORED MY REQUEST FOR A HEARING, and in her order granting him leave to withdraw about 2 months before my trial, thanked him. I had spent a ton of time trying to find private attorneys and trying to talk to the FPBP, telling them very clearly that I expected to be put back on the list.After Mr. Ratner withdrew, the FPBP refused to put me back on the list. I was forced into trial BY MYSELF, at 1-2 months prior to trial, after 3 months of my time being completely wasted by Mr. Ratner and his law firm.
I went through the appropriate legal process to submit an expert witness. Judge Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers, as usual, completely ignored my motions, but allowed me to use him after I went through the entire legal process, and paid him thousands of dollars without knowing if I would be granted permission or not, and provided the Court a report stating that the carotid hold was ILLEGAL unless the subject exhibited "assaultive behavior" and that Defendants had never alleged any behavior of mine that constituted "assaultive behavior" (under POST Basic, during 2017). The expert was a Master level instructor at a police academy and former SWAT.
Mr. King provided his pre-trial disclosures, and it contained a document from Rohnert Park police department which had been extensively redacted on the copy that they had provided to me. The new copy contained the contact information for the bystander witness. I called him, and he confirmed that he saw the entire thing, that I had never yelled at the deputies before the first deputy grabbed my arm, and that I was not resisting at any point in time. I told the judge this. She had me call him at a hearing, and both me and Mr. King were allowed a couple of minutes to ask him questions, where he refused to admit that I was even "wiggling" when Mr. King badgered him.
RPPD later sent me the email correspondence between them and Mr. King and Mr. King clearly stated that he had that copy in his records without them sending it, but wanted them to send it to appear official, meaning they had the contact information for the bystander witness the entire time, when they repeatedly lied that they didn't have it.
The judge then refused to allow him to appear at the trial over Zoom (during the height of Covid, even though she let one of the deputies), and refused to summon him to the trial.
Just prior to the trial, the Judge accused me falsely of firing my attorney, and explicitly prohibited me from telling the jury about ANY of the Defendants previous statements about the camera's ability to record (that they had lied about it for 4 years). She explicitly prohibited me from submitting scientific evidence about the carotid hold. She allowed Mr. King to make extremely defamatory false remarks about me and my past which had a huge impact on the jury's perception of things. At a pretrial hearing, we had gone over about 110 documents that I wanted to present at the trial. She vetted about 40 as admissible at the hearing, but at the trial she only let me submit about 4. Defendants were allowed to submit a SECOND expert witness, both of whom worked for the Sonoma County Sheriff's Office. The first was Andrew Cash. The second was James Naugle who had been disclosed literally a week before trial, without a report, and without allowing me to take his deposition. She refused to allow me to ask Mr. Naugle about case laws, or about information pertaining to the carotid hold. The Court refused to summon any of my treating physicians, whom I had provided the names and contact information for in my disclosures at the end of Discovery and some in my initial disclosures, and I had complied with Mr. King's written requests for information or objected within the boundaries of the laws (which I quoted and cited), in good faith, and complied with the Court's orders, in good faith.
I had informed the Court that I was scheduled for medical evaluations for brain injury AFTER THE TRIAL. The Court completely ignored this.
So it was my word against theirs. 5 years, at the time of the mistrial, to get a mockery of a trial, and have the jurors' time completely wasted. The jury wrote me a letter thanking me or something, but awarded me nothing.
I was diagnosed with organic brain injury after the trial. I had a similar test prior to the incident and had absolutely no problems and answered every question with no trouble. I now score in the FOURTH PERCENTILE on those areas.
Despite its length, this has been a short summary of all the events over the past 6 years. Much has been summarized, and much has been left out. I tried my best to balance completeness with leaving out irrelevant details.
There is no record of any misconduct on the part of anyone involved in this that is available to any law enforcement agencies or to the public. Nobody has been disciplined. No investigation was ever conducted. I was almost killed and was seriously injured, under a camera, and in front of witnesses, and spent 6 years working with the government. The government has done precisely NOTHING.
The County now routinely retaliates against me whenever we interact, in blatant violation of various laws.

I already submitted the application, but if a professor submits a letter of recommendation for that application after the deadline on CommonApp, will the CommonApp automatically update my application to include the letter? Or do I have to do something about it?
Btw, my professor submitted it 1 minute passed the deadline... aka exactly 12:00am the next day.

PROFILE
Demographics:

• Korean girl from the Bay Area
• Small competitive private school, high income (no aid needed), no hooks

Intended Major: Mathematics, second choice economics
SAT: 1590 (790 ERW, 800 Math)
GPA and Rank: 4.0 UW, school does not weight or rank
Coursework

• School does not offer AP/IB or honors classes but does have very rigorous curriculum.
• Took calculus in freshman year, multivariable calc, linear algebra, differential equations, complex analysis, many more, all at school.
• Also have taken 6 economics courses at school.

AP scores: Physics C: Mechanics, Calculus BC, Computer Science A. All 5s. Self-studied since my school doesn't offer AP classes.
Awards:

• International and national awards for mathematical modeling
• AIME
• USACO Silver
• NACLO Invitational Qualifier
• National Spanish Exam Silver
• Many Model UN awards, including international
• Scholastic Gold & Silver Keys

Extracurriculars:

1. Co-president of ~70 member educational nonprofit that raises around $75,000 a year by running various academic classes; we use this money to run enrichment programs for local underprivileged school districts.
2. Economics/public health-adjacent research with Stanford professor. Co-authored 2 papers, both published in peer-reviewed journals.
3. Math Club and Linguistics Club president.
4. Model United Nations team officer. Attend around 3-4 conferences a year.
5. Competitive 6-week math camp (think Ross, etc).
6. A summer research program that no longer exists (5% acceptance rate) - authored quantitative public policy paper but didn't publish.
7. Varsity soccer team member since freshman year.
8. County Youth Commission member. One of 20 ish students representing county of around 100k students. (only 10th-11th).
9. Work as barista at local coffee shop on weekends (only 11th).
10. Freelance digital artist, around $1,000 made in commissions.

Essays: Anywhere from solid to strong. Had them all approved by counselor, as well as former AOs for some schools. I don't think my topics were particularly outstanding (kinda don't have a super interesting life), but the delivery and essay quality/flow were all very good.
LORs:

• Math teacher: 9/10. I've taken 6 classes with him. I was very reserved in my first class with him but I'm now super engaged and proactive etc so he's seen me grow a lot.
• Economics teacher: 9/10. Taken 3 classes with him. Said I was one of the "best students of my generation" apparently. He's also the club advisor for the Model UN team.
• Counselor: 8/10. He was my advisor for 2 years and also coaches soccer so he knows me beyond just our meetings.
• (Additional) Stanford professor: 9/10. I honestly don't really know what he wrote but he promised me it was very strong. He's gotten a lot of kids into Stanford, though not everyone obviously.
• (Additional) Math program director: 8/10. I actually got to read this rec; it was quite long and honestly kinda off-topic sometimes, but still very strong.

Interviews:

• Princeton (REA): 6/10. Decent, pleasant conversation, nothing outstanding.
• MIT: 8/10. Connected pretty well with interviewer and she seemed very impressed with me.
• Harvard: 7/10. Super fun and chill, but also only like 30 min.
• Stanford: 5/10. Very mid. Again nothing went wrong, but unexciting.
• Yale: 10/10. Absolutely delightful, suuuch a fun conversation, went way over time.

​
RESULTS (All RD)
Acceptances:

• Yale :D - will probably commit
• Duke
• Emory
• Amherst
• Harvey Mudd + 40k merit scholarship
• UC Berkeley
• UC Santa Barbara + College of Creative Studies
• UC Davis
• NYU
• UW + 29k merit scholarship

Waitlists:

• Stanford (1% waitlist rate... more selective than getting admitted... so close yet so far)
• UChicago
• Columbia
• UCLA
• UC San Diego
• UC Irvine

Rejections:

• Princeton (deferred REA)
• MIT
• Harvard
• Brown
• Caltech
• Johns Hopkins
• Swarthmore (literally 0 effort essay so expected)
• Northeastern (yield protection smh)

​
REFLECTION
This has certainly been a rollercoaster of an application season... getting deferred and rejected from my dream schools, and also rejected from my best friends' schools, left me pretty heartbroken these past few weeks. I opened Ivy decisions in alphabetical order, so it really went from rock-bottom Princeton rejection to the pure excitement of getting into fucking Yale!!
I will probably commit to Yale but also remain on the Stanford waitlist since it has like a 10% accept rate which is nontrivial. Will decline all other offers/waitlists ASAP <3
Finally, I wanted to share a few lessons I've learned from my personal experience, which may or may not be applicable to other people:

1. Essays are so fucking important. Like I grinded so hard on my essays but still wish I did more. Demonstrating genuine passion and excitement and emotions is sooo important I've realized. I'm a pretty good writer but I absolutely despise the writing process. The only two colleges for which I genuinely enjoyed writing the supplementals were Yale and Duke, and guess what, they're my top options now. On the other hand, schools like Caltech and JHU were absolute torture to write, and that was probably reflected (subconsciously) in the tone of my essays.
2. Make sure you are ready when applying ED/EA/REA. Princeton and MIT were my two dream schools going into this process, and I spent the longest time debating where to apply early. I chose to REA to Princeton pretty last-minute, and hence my essays were like pretty mid (well-written but boring). My essay writing improved so much over NovembeDecember, and I honestly feel like if I had applied RD I would have had a much better shot at getting in. Make sure your essays for REA are top quality so they are competitive against the RD pool as well!!!
3. "Fit" is a real thing. Honestly I didn't really think about "fit" too much when choosing where to apply, but looking back on my results I can see a clear trend. I'm a pretty well-rounded, academically-oriented person (plan on going to grad school), and I was accepted to a lot of liberal artsy schools, and rejected by a lot of places that are more technical or specialized. As an aspiring math major, I was quite disappointed by MIT and Caltech rejections, but upon reflection it honestly makes sense given my pretty scattered application profile (definitely not a cope). Also, this definitely depends a lot on the interviewer you get, but my Yale interview was by far the most comfortable, natural, and fun interview I had.
4. UC admissions are wacky. As an in-state applicant with a perfect GPA, I basically used the UCs as my safety schools. My counselor said he'd be "surprised if I didn't get into one of UCLA or Berkeley." So, imagine my distress getting waitlisted at UCI, UCSD, and UCLA all on the same day. Luckily Cal came in clutch, but that was definitely a blow to my self-confidence at first. Also worth noting that the UCs understandably tend to favor public school students more, so results from my wacky little private school might be skewed.

Hope this was helpful/interesting, thanks for reading <3

Long story short, I have my ps3 and 4 above my pc and would like to swap the HDMI at will. Only problem is any headset I use is very quiet. Turtle beaches that broke was not like this, I assume its the optical cable or like dual audio system or something. Im willing to buy a cheap optical headset as long as its confirmed to work with the ps3. I have an HDMI extractor to use but it doesn't change the audio.
If anyone has a headset they use I could buy online or some work around to this audio bs I would very much appreciate any advice.

Long time lurker, first time poster here! I decided this year after a very traumatic illness last year in which I was treated by a PsyD for some of the after effects of said illness that I wanted to change my entire career path in life. I feel with 100% certainty that I would like to go down a similar career path of getting a PsyD (or PhD if the program made sense) with the hope to one day work with patients going through a similar journey.
The problem is, I fully realize how non-traditional of an applicant I am and am at a bit of a loss of where to go from here. I'm a recruiter in big tech and my undergraduate degree (3.9 GPA, full-ride recipient) is in business. I know that my next immediate step would be to take some undergraduate coursework for required psychology classes I have missing on my transcript. I also would need to try to gain some clinical experience, although I am not sure the best way to do this and what to search for as someone with a different background. In the interim, I have applied to Clinical Recruiter positions that recruit psychologists and am hoping something like this could also beef up my resume. In terms of personal statement, I know I can do well with this part as the illness was a life changing one and has made me so passionate about helping others experiencing similar things.
However, I just don't know how often people like me get accepted into these sorts of programs. If you were a non-traditional applicant without a psych undergrad degree can you please give me your thoughts? Or if you were a traditional applicant, any advice for someone like me? Sorry for all the rambling. One of those nights, up researching programs & knowing I badly want to do this but feeling a bit of, "how the heck am I going to make it happen?"
ETA: I also would love to hear of other paths, maybe things I'm not thinking of that could allow me to be in this space, whether it's a specific master's program or other ways to eventually be able to be in this line of work.

hi everyone! i was recently admitted to harvard via the common app but rejected from all the ivys i applied through qb match. i just wanted to come on here and give some insight.

1. ESSAYS MATTER (PRACTICE AND SAVE YOUR DREAM SCHOOL FOR LAST): for context i ranked 6 schools for the match, one of which was williams, but they did not require a supplemental until regular decision. i did end up getting in, but only had to write a supp after i had alot of practice from the match. all of the reach schools i got into (williams, boston college, usc, harvard) i used the same supplemental i came up with literally on the deadline or something like that. even though my match ranked schools were my “dream” schools, i didn’t end up getting into 5/6 of them bc i wrote my essays so early on.
   
2. DON’T MAKE EXCUSES (at least on your app): i was number 36 in my class of 275 in the beginning of senior year, failed out of honors precalc junior year, and literally came into high school with my middle school teachers refusing to assign me to honors level classes (i took all cp freshman year and had to convince my teachers to move me up). i self-studied for the sat and miraculously scored a 1550, and landed myself just within top 10% of my class 2nd semester of senior year when i scored at the top of my class for the semester. even when i had so many errors and failures that could be seen in my application, i addressed it with a positive mindset and owned it. in the additional info section when i talked about my math grade, i didn’t come up with excuses, but explained what i learned from the failures. USE FAILURES AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO SUBSTANTIATE YOUR RESILIENCE (questies i know you all have very difficult experiences that make our accomplishments all the more impressive).
   
3. YOUR DREAM SCHOOL MIGHT NOT BE WHERE YOU’RE MOST HAPPY.
   

i got rejected from upenn cas through ed. straight up rejected. but now that i’m looking back it was a blessing in disguise. so many people i know at penn has either taken a gap year or dropped out. i don’t know why i romanticized it so much (i am looking forward to taking advantage of the grade inflation at harvard though). it’s really cliche but i am a firm believer that you are truly meant to go where you’re supposed to.

1. YES NOT MATCHING SUCKS: but get this: my friend’s brother who graduated from northwestern this past year after getting matched in 2018 HATED his college experience and got absolutely nothing out of it other than seasonal depression and a soul-sucking hatred for the quarter system (and “a horrible gpa”). he said he probably would have fared better at our state flagship, and literally didn’t make any friends or take on an internship or anything. he wanted to transfer out so bad but he felt like he couldn’t bc he was on a full scholarship. What you do and take advantage of at the school is far more valuable than getting an early acceptance :)

I can’t lie and say that I wasn’t completely full of self doubt and anxiety for the three months i waited for decisions to come out. I dreaded school everyday and physically wanted to just scream and cry whenever some adult asked me about college.
But it was so worth the wait. Seriously. The match is not the end all be all. It’s just the first of many opportunities.
Good luck to all the juniors who applied to cps + will be going through this process soon. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions :)