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2023.06.05 05:29 lxcerne I'm telling my dad my sister's boyfriend has a wife and kids
I'm on my phone and english is not my first language, etc, etc.
I'll try to keep this as short as possible. I have a sister who's older by a couple of years. we're both in our mid 20's. She's 27 and I'm 23. She's been the other woman for like 3 years officially, but they've been messing around for like 4 or 5 years. At first, my mom was so angry with her, and showed it. Me too, because there was nothing anyone could say to make my sister change her mind, and this dude and his wife even had like 3 little kids at the time. For the first year or so, we (me and my mom) didn't know for sure, but we suspected something was going on.
Then, one day my mom went to pick her up at work and she saw them kissing. She confronted them and he told my mom she was crazy and my sister left with him. My mom told my dad and they were both angry at her. My parents fought a lot about it, too, because they didn't reach an agreement on what to do. My dad wanted to cut off her phone plan (like, he didn't want to pay for it anymore if she was gonna use it on this dude) and my mom wanted to give it time and let my sister cut things off. Things went on like this for a while, until a couple of months later they "broke up". Now I know they never did, but my sister pretended to so my dad would keep on paying for her phone bill. My mom was none the wiser, until she realized after they were back together. This time, though, my mom didn't want to tell my dad and never did.
Now, my sister and this dude have been together for like 3 years since then, but it's a toxic relationship, as expected. He doesn't want to cut contact with the kids (obviously) nor his wife/ex wife (they haven't divorced yet), and my sister talks shit about the ex (current?) wife being crazy and stuff. I'm sure my sister thinks one day this dude will leave his kids for her, and as much as I hate the dude's guts, I gotta give it to him: At least he's (somewhat) there for his kids.
The thing is, my sister's mood is so volatile, and her world revolves around him. She cuts off every friend that doesn't agree with her or says something about the boyfriend. She works where he works and doesn't want to look for another job, (even though her position doesn't require a degree) and as of two years ago, she got her professional degree. If she fights with him (which is at least once a week) then all hell becomes loose. I still live with my parents because i'm at college rn and where I live you don't really leave your parents house until you got a stable job. She lives here too, because ??? she's stuck I guess. Plus, my dad isn't here a lot, his job requires for him to travel a lot for short periods of time so I see him like two hours at night and some weekends.
We have to be so careful aroung her and walk on eggshells in case she had a spat with her boyfriend. She treats us badly. She'll scream at me or my mom. She usually ignores my dad. Lately I feel like I've been her punchbag all these years, because at least she's got some amount of respect for my mom.
Like 30 minutes ago, I talked to my mom about how this has been taking a toll on me, and while I don't want to cause her any more stress, I'd be really thankful if she could stop my sister from screaming her lungs out at me. My mom told me it wasn't her problem, and that I should avoid my sister if she's in a bad mood. I told her it's not just a bad mood, she's making our house such an hostile enviroment, but my mom shrugged me off, said if I ignore her she'll stop bothering me. I admit I was a little distressed, so I told her if she wouldn't have my back, then I would seek dad's support. She got so angry. Called me a traitor and told me I was making a scene and that I should always prioritize my sister because my sister would always do the same.
I really want to tell my dad, but I don't want my sister and my mother to be angry with me, or to make them feel like I betrayed them.
Anyways. That's it. Thanks for reading. I guess I feel a little better after writing it out.
submitted by lxcerne
to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:29 EraseTheMatrix Dreams and astral experiences
I'm an astral traveler. I've been lucid dreaming and astral traveling for ten years. I've seen things most people can't imagine. I've seen planets from space and fallen into black holes. I've even had my astral body killed a few times. It's no big deal you just manifest a new astral body possibly in a different place. I've been to where they run the reincarnation scam. I've fought negative entities. I've seen entities pretend to be god. I've run into white light traps. If I haven't seen it all I've seen a lot of it.
I don't usually go into these experiences on this sub because at the moment I'm trying to figure out how the matrix works so we can eventually shut it down. But I think it's important to the big picture that I go into these subjects now. So if you have any questions you want to ask an experienced astral traveler post them in the comments.
Here is the big picture. From what I can tell everything is really one consciousness. Experiencing itself from different points of view. The stars the planets and everything else are consciousness. But most of it is unconscious. And not self aware. There are two types of consciousness. Consciousness that is self aware. And consciousness that is not self aware. In the second category you have thought forms and negative entities. Thought forms are constructs that seem to be real people but aren't self aware. Negative entities fall into this category but they are more powerful then your average thought form. More on that later.
So what is the nature of dreams and astral experiences. From what I can tell dreams are really unaware astral experiences. When your dreaming your sleep walking in the astral. Usually in your own subconsciously created world. The astral is usually less dense so it's easy to create anything you want. There are exceptions and there are more dense worlds. Those you should stay away from because they aren't easy to change. So dreams are unaware astral experiences. I've had regular dreams become super hyper real astral experiences. That were three times more real then earth.
So in the astral there are things to watch out for. The biggest problem is negative entities. Negative entities are a kind of thought form construct. Made intentionally by evil people who are self aware. But negative entities themselves are not self aware. I know this from experience because I've had them in my house and I could sense that they weren't self aware. Then I had this confirmed later by other people who had problems with them. So negative entities are the biggest problem in the astral.
Aside from that the biggest problem is you creating your own hell. Basically in worlds that are less dense reality is fluid and easily changeable. So you can end up manifesting your worst fears. This has happened to me many times and I can tell you it isn't fun. I'm terrified of black holes. So I would have astral experiences where I kept manifesting them accidentally. This isn't fun but if your the only person there you can easily change it and make something nice.
I had one astral experience where I went to a creepy looking heaven world. And some of the plants there tried to eat me. So I raised the frequency of the planet (easy to do when you are the only person there.) and it became a paradise. With pristine heaven like beaches. When your run into bad shit in the astral the best thing to do is try to radiate as much love as you can. So that it raises your frequency and repels anything negative.
So how is this connected to everything being one consciousness. I'll tell you. I had an astral experience recently where I ran into a town full of zoned out ghosts. Anyone who came in there was hit with energy that caused them to go unconscious and black out. They tried to do this to me but I resisted. And got the hell out of there. Then I had an experience months ago where I ran into this chocolate energy and it was trying to make me black out and go unconscious.
I think that everything is one consciousness. But parts of it are conscious and parts of it are not. Most of it isn't. But if you can use energy to make someone black out and go unconscious you could also do the reverse and make something that isn't conscious conscious. So you could take a rock and hit it with energy that causes it to wake up and become self aware. So everything really is one consciousness experiencing itself from different points of view.
The matrix is just an energetic environment where consciousness has been seriously locked down. But in the astral it is more free. And by the astral I don't mean the fake heaven worlds run by the archons. I just mean any place that isn't earth. So in the end we are all each other. Seeing things from different points of view. So let me know what you think. I'm a very experienced astral traveler. If you have any questions let me know in the comments.
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to MatrixReality [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:29 AwayAway2023 Dead End Job Cycle
I've been struggling a lot with finding a career path since my teen years. I'm 27M now and feel like I still don't know myself well enough to know what I want to do. I've worked numerous jobs over the past 10 years, mostly warehouse work and I've never stayed more than a couple years because I can't handle poor management, wages and work culture.
My current job isn't all that bad. It's a straight days warehouse job, but it has very poor management, my boss is really toxic and some of my coworkers lack work ethic which puts stress on the small crew we have to get our orders out. There is zero accountability and because of that it's really hard for me to care. I am a hard worker and will try my best to do the task at hand. I went out of my way to learn new skills and help out my other workers, I even worked through my breaks when I first started 2 years ago to keep orders moving, but now I just don't care. I've already used 8 of my 10 paid leave days this year just because I don't want to deal with it.
I suppose I have a lack of motivation to get out of this dead end job rut. I attribute this to the severe depression and anxiety that runs in my family. My father had it so bad he couldn't even maintain a job. I'm nowhere near that bad, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't let it get in the way of pursuing other opportunities.
Over the last several years I've been indulging in video editing and sound design. It's something I really enjoy even if it is a lot of work. I don't know how realistic it is to be able to use those skills in a career, especially because I live in a small town and moving is out of the question for now as I have a fiancé bound here for work. I guess youtube could always be a career, but honestly that's incredibly far fetched and not at all stable. Right now I just kind of feel lost, stuck and hopeless. Not sure I'll ever amount to anything even though I feel I'm worth for more than any dead end job.
I guess I just want to hear from people in similar situations. How did you know what you wanted to do? Maybe a dead end job isn't all that bad if it pays the bills. I appreciate any responses.
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to careeradvice [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:28 T7empest666 Where do I start.
So I’ve surfed pretty much my whole life (23) I’d surf 1-3 hrs at average 4-5 days a week. It’s my reason for living. But I’ve recently moved 4 hrs away and if I wanna go for a surf which k crave everyday it’s a minimum 1hr 20 mins drive for closest point and beach breaks. Or 50 mins to a not that great of a surf beach. Since moving I’ve been surfing twice a week and a third if I’m lucky.
As I don’t have a solid income at the moment getting the petrol to get me to the beach is a struggle so I’m thinking of getting a surf-skate to ride around my street and keep in touch with my surfing as I can feel myself losing it.
Literally anything that can point me in the direction of performance surfing will be appreciated.
I looked thru this sub and i don’t just wanna pick a random board and it not be what I’m after. So will appreciate any advice on board/trucks/bearings/wheels for keeping in touch with short board style surfing. Cut backs, snaps and whatever. What brands should I be looking for? Do boards come in sizes if so what sizes and how are they measured? What’s the best Trucks and wheels for doing snap like manoeuvres and sliding the tail out? Thanks in advance.
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to surfskate [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:28 Nadyalevi Want to leave shitty hole LA for Lake Arrowhead.
Hi there everyone! Me and my family from Eastern Europe, living in LA for a year and u know what it’s a worst experience I ever had. Mostly because of high crime, wierdos, junkies etc. (Today , for example , there was a shooting with two victims , neighboring cars were fired at , fortunately we and our car were not injured ) I think it’s absolutely unsafe city for living with two kiddos. And another aspect is weather. We used to live in area where we can find every season like spring, fall and real winter , so we decided to find something with snow and clear air , peaceful , and with beautiful landscapes. After I stopped my gaze on Lake arrowhead, Twin Peak and Crestline I found that there are cataclysms taking place in these areas. And I'm trying to figure out if it's worth it. Will I be able to go out to work in the winter? Do floods occur often ? How about neighbors? I will be very appreciate for any answers! Ty!
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to lakearrowhead [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:28 gkyer 23F, Fever, lung, kidney and intestine pain? Please help me diagnose my girlfriend
Female 5'3", 121lbs. 23 years old.
Before anything, I have to say that neither she or I can afford a doctor unless this is a real emergency. She’s unemployed atm, doesn’t have Medicare and I or anyone else she knows can’t really help her with much since at least I am real tight on money :/
Ok so, right after she came back from a vacation in Mexico (hardly paid by her parents who live there, just in case) she was boiling hot and complained about having pain in the chest, kidney and intestinal area and she could not sleep the night she came back because of the pain, she coughed often, made pain/wheezing noises and breathed fast and on a “weird” way, she was also feeling weak. She said those symptoms were in since like 1-2 days prior but very mild/little, but after running around in the airport everything became worst.
After 3-4 days apparently it all went away but she got her period, and after that she was fine for like 3 days when she felt like this again. Now she also mentioned that her pee looks brown and she can’t really hold it once she feels like peeing. She’s sleeping fine but has pain before going to sleep, the temperature and pain seem to lower a little at times but then it comes back in. She’s not hungry and mentions that when she ingests water or food she feels pain, like if her insides were hot and food fell straight into her intestine walls? That’s the way she explained it but I can’t tell what that means. Her chest pain appears to come from the lungs especially the left side, and the area in between the breast and the end of the rib.
In case this may have relevance, she went to Mexico to get a reconstructive nose surgery, all screening and blood tests previous to the surgery seemed normal. This all started like 2 weeks after the surgery tho she says she’s not been feeling so good ever since that day, tho it wasn’t this bad before either. (I have to say before anyone mentions the money, this was part of her insurance in Mexico, she has double nationality and have insurance there but can’t go back again to get checked atm).
She was diagnosed with asthma when she was a kid but apparently it went away 2-3 years ago. I have to say that she’s never had the greatest diet, water intake (this especially), or exercise.
What can this be? And how should we treat it or does it go away on its own? The only things that I can think about is UTI and pneumonia but I can’t tell…
Any help would be seriously appreciated, thanks to anyone who takes the time to give us a hand with this.
submitted by gkyer
to medical [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 butterybbs LDR gf (22F) lied to me (23M) about something before we dated and I just found out 3 years into the relationship, how do I trust her word?
I have been dating this girl for almost exactly 3 years now. She means the world to me and we have honestly had a great relationship up till this point. I've always been the chill bf that has always trusted her and she has always trusted me. We have had our fair share of fights, but we have always been able to work through them together. In reality, I was best friends with her for like 2 years before we started dating and also were FWB for a little bit. During that stage we used to talk about everything and how we only wanted each other so I was under the impression that we were exclusive. She talked about this guy hitting on her and I didn't think much of it cuz I didn't think I needed to. Fast forward towards near the beginning of the relationship, she says she hooked up with that guy during our talking stage (gave head only). I was pretty immature at that time cuz I never had dated anyone and I thought we were exclusive during that stage (in her defense we never talked about exclusivity) and I got pretty upset. She then lied and said she was just testing to see what I did and after some time I believed her. I sometimes brought up the subject but she kept brushing it off. For the rest of our relationship, I fully trust her and she is honestly really sweet and takes a ton of care of me, more so than I ever expected anyone to do for me. But one day, when I brought it up I could tell something was off and eventually she told me. The only thing is she changed her story from what she said initially to "he was touching her" (yes in that way) but she felt too guilty to continue and left before anything else happened. In her head, saying that she just gave head was better to tell me since she thought i'd be less upset at that (I'd much rather have had her lie about that than lie about a lie), but regardless she lied multiple times. I really want to believe what she told me because I gave her multiple opportunities telling her I won't throw away a 3 year relation for something that happened before we dated. I honestly could care less about what she did, its just the fact she lied to me. If her stories from the beginning of the relationship and now matched up, I'd have a much easier time forgiving her and letting it go, but its just the fact that the stories differ that trips me up. I still love her and the person I am now wouldn't judge her for her past. The past me would have but I've grown up from then and if she didn't lie initially, I wouldn't have had the best 3 years of my life. Its just tearing me apart though thinking that she is still lying about what she did even though I told her that she can tell me everything she did and I will forgive it, but it would still take a while for my trust to be regained. If I find out now that she did lie to me again, I think I'd have no other option than to break up and that is really what is making my heart sink everytime I think that she was lying. She also hates talking about the subject because she feels like a terrible person for doing that to me, and I do believe that, but she is willing to talk about it and reassure me. I just get a feeling that she hates talking about it because she still might be hiding something, but she swore she wasn't. How do you guys think I should approach this, I really want to believe her and move on since I love her so much but idk how to.
TL;DR: My gf said she gave head during our talking stage to someone else but then lied cuz I got upset. I then found out 3 years later after she was being weird about but her story changed and he only touched her. Idc what her past is, I'm upset that she lied and breached my trust, but the thing holding me back from moving on is that she made a lie up, then lied about that lie by saying they didnt do anything, and then told me a different story and swears on everything and everyone that she is telling me the truth. How do I fully believe her?
submitted by butterybbs
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 therealiota As a Software Engineer, how much is your annual salary?
If this post is not related to the sub, pardon me. I have been a software engineer since 2015 and my salary was $65,000. Then I switched in 2016 and salary was $78,000 and I worked on the same salary for 4 years. Then unemployment hit me and I got the job last year and I am at $120,000.
I am a masters in computer science from CU Boulder. Can you guys share your salary range as a software engineer in Denver and I want to check how much I am making, is it wayyyyyy lower than the average or above average?
submitted by therealiota
to Denver [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 TheAlexvideo Thoughts on the ACER H6543BDK?
I'm looking for a projector to use outdoors - I've gone through a few and tried to find the brightest as I am going to start using it at sunset (I know using a projector while it's still light out is not great, but it's only for the first 40 minutes or so before it gets dark) and I've looked for a few options. I wanted to get the samsung freestyle as my brother has had one all year, but I've seen how dark it is and it doesn't seem worth paying an extra £60 from the others below
My three options right now are the Optoma 145X, the Optoma 146X and finally the ACER H6543BDK. By my very little knowledge the Acer one looks the best by a mile, but it's new and I cannot find a single review of it online anywhere so I just want to know if someone can confirm by looking at the specs if it seems like it would do the job? They're all relatively the same price.
I will be using it in the garden, the projector will be 10-15ft away and I will be projecting it onto one of those cheap £20 projector screens from Amazon (not sure if that's recommended or if there's any alternatives). Will be 100-150ft depending on the projector I get.
It's for a watch party for a football match, so it doesn't have to be perfect. Just as long as you can tell what's happening im happy. Thanks
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to budgetprojectors [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 Budget_Tomorrow_4259 AITA for not letting my son have his college fun if he marries his boyfriend?
My (50M) oldest Cooper (18M) just graduated highschool. Me and the wife have a college fund set up for him that we've been putting in since he was little. It's a pretty substantial amount. He doesn't actually need it though as he got full rides on football and academic scholarships if he wants them. He's a really strong and bright kid.
Cooper has been dating this boy Kristopher (18M) for about two yrs now. Even though he's a little rough around the edges he's a good kid and we generally like him. Apparently Kristopher is signing up to the marines. Well last week Cooper decides to tell us that he's not going to school and that he and Kristopher are going to get married after he finishes Basic. You can guess I wasn't to happy with that..
I asked him why he'd give up so much like that abd he just responded that he wanted to always stay close to Kristopher and start a life with him. He then asked if he could use his college fund to do so. I quickly reminded him that he's barely 18 and that he's never lived outside our house before much less living with a partner. He got mad and told he could handle it and it was his choice.
Which started a whole argument about how he was wasting his potential and giving up his plans just to follow Kristopher around. I told him the college fund was for college and I wasn't gonna let him throw his life away for some boy. That he couldn't get it unless he went to college. AITA?
submitted by Budget_Tomorrow_4259
to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 wonderful_throw_away I know that you write
I sit and think of your beauty. Your pacing, your frustration. Your glasses sheilding your eyes that dart swiftly across mine glistening as the ocean does on a bright summer’s day. I long to tell you more about your beauty and intelligence and grace. But all I can think about is your hand.
It’s writing every day. It’s placing your harmful thoughts down onto paper, or into digital ink. I think of how much lighter you must feel after you release that energy into writing. And how much freer you find yourself unburdened by harmful thoughts.
But I find myself feeling sad that you feel you must write. For you are so lovely and so beautiful and sweet that you having to even lift even a finger to exorcise feelings of self doubt or self hatred is an act against humanity. I wonder how long you feel like you must write. If your hand becomes tired each day and that you, instead of feeling ready to rest, you feel that exhaustion that only comes when struggling with depression dragging you to sleep.
I can only hope that the urge to write becomes less and fades into nothingness, that you feel you can write about your science and life and approach sleep not as a sweet release but as preparation and rejuvenation. And yet I know that you write.
Do you write the same things every day?
submitted by wonderful_throw_away
to UnsentLetters [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 DrMalcomGrant The Wild Unknown
Hi, I’m not sure how helpful this might be but I wanted to mention my experience as a beginner with this deck!
Three months ago at nearly 40 years old I finally myself purchasing my first tarot deck, the New Editition RWS. After a whole life of admiring from a distance the art in tarot. Growing up in a conservative Christian cult there there has always been this place in my heart that told me to look away from tarot.
Long story short I totally did it! I bought my deck and fell in love with reading it and getting to know it. But I found myself with an itch to find the deck which spoke to me, so I set out, which is where I found the Wild Unknown!
I’ve read here and there how some Redditors seem to have a rough time with the dark nature of this deck, how brutal it can be. While I have no question about how others have experienced, I believe their experience is theirs and true, I have had nothing but bright and insightful and overwhelmingly positive reads from this deck!
It has actually felt at times like I have an excellent therapist to sit down with whenever I need them. While I still use my RWS when I just am really needing it, I’m almost 90% using my Wild Unknown and loving it.
I think this might be my first post, I’m so happy to be a part of this group and have learned so much from you all! Just thought I’d share my experience this far(= Support unions and please keep sharing your insight and experiences with tarot, I’m still learning everyday (=
submitted by DrMalcomGrant
to tarot [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 shamshiq My Strange Relationship With the Mongolian Women of Britain
So apparently there are about 4000 Mongolian citizens residing in the UK. I’ve met 7 Mongolians in my few years of here, of which 6 were women. I’ve slept with 5 of those 6 women. By those figures I’ve slept with .0013% of the British Mongolian population, surely more than any other man in Britain. When you narrow it down to women in my age group, the percentage is much higher.
It’s kind of crazy that I’ve slept with so many Mongolian women given how rare they are here. Each one I met independently of the others through multiple avenues (uni, london nightlife, and dating apps). I’ve never sought out Mongolian women, but for better or worse, they always seem to find me.
Yeah I know this is a weird thing to post about I don’t care
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2023.06.05 05:27 FullyCautious How much is 3a pickaxe nowdays
Read the forums some are selling over 5.4B.. isn't it overpriced? Druidic robes are literally 1B'ish
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to 2007scape [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 itsBigEasy Let's call this rock bottom
I have had a day now to reflect on the last month. A major relapse on my over a decade long battle with compulsive gambling. Now at 30 and with a higher salary the total monetary value of the losses in this episode is much higher. But I can end it today in a position that I can recover from.
There have been many times over the last 10 years where I have gambled away every dollar I had and had to live off a shoestring or cash load or pawn shop to survive to the next paycheck. There was even an episode of stealing from my parents. All though my losses at the time were in the hundreds or the low thousands it was everything I had. I can't think of a time back then where I had 10k to my name.
In the last couple of years I got a much better job than I had back then and I nicer salary. More importantly I have not been gambling. I managed to save 80k. My problem is sports betting. In the last month I wiped away half of that. That represented my 15k in savings 10k in spending account. And a further 15k in my credit card. With my next paycheck and selling my 10k crypto portfolio I was able to payoff credit immediately. That just left my 40k stocks portfolio which luckily for me would take time to sell and has been enough of an inconvenience for me to need to stop and think about what I was doing.
After the first 2 weeks I was 20k down and just could not let it go. I had to make it back. And here we are now. Down another 20. My bet size for sports bets and multis is much larger now than it had been in the past. I was placing a lot of 2 or 3k bets with roughly 3x payoffs and of course missing. One betting agencys responsible gambling division even contacted me and I agreed to letting them block my account. I managed to lost another roughly 4k through other agencies since then but now I have closed all those accounts.
It's pretty fucked and very disappointing. You all know the feeling. I was vaguely looking into getting into housing market as my net worth approached 100k. That is now set back at least 6 months. On top of the money my health and performance at work took a huge hit. For me compulsive gambling and binge eating go together plus poor sleep and lack of interest in my job.
Anyway I know the only way out now is to completely stop and let go of the money I lost. I am very grateful not to be in debt and to have money for rent and food. I have a new girlfriend and it's early enough that she did not know my financial situation. So no one to explain a missing 40k to.
I only hope it is not a black mark that will mean I won't be able to get a home loan In the future.
In these next few months I am going to put my head down and focus on saving and getting in awesome physical shape. Plus try to focus on learning some new skills outside of work that will help me with my career and something else to hopefully be passionate in.
Something is out of wack with my outlook on life when I can free fall like this so willingly. Putting all my hard work at stake. Why do I act like I have nothing to lose. Like my future is not worth building towards. Or that it's something worth risking. Good things take time and effort. Gambling is a quick, cheep, empty and a sham shortcut.
This is day one for me and I plan to use this post as a diary for weekly updates to keep me motivated and focused.
Tldr: I lost half my 80k life savings in a month at 30. Thankfully no debt or dependents and as much as this sucks I am going to turn my life around starting now.
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2023.06.05 05:27 ffitzpatrick00 I am a burden
I (23F) am only a burden to my family. I developed an eating disorder at age 18 after battling depression for what felt like the entirety of my life. I still struggle with everything. I've been through hell and back, trying everything and being forced to try anything that might work by my parents, including some really traumatic shit. But now, more than ever before, it feels like I only bring my family down. And it all started with my older sister (27F) expressing her hatred for me.
She has called my eating disorder (ED) attention seeking. It was never like that, I can vouch for that since I'm the one experiencing it. But the ED did change the family dynamic. I know because of my psychological issues that I'm a pain to deal with. I'm emotionally sensitive to even the most minuscule things, I'm almost always in a mood or having a day with ED or depressive behaviors, and I still live with my parents. I'm almost done with my bachelor's degree, which I never would've thought possible a couple of years ago. I have reasons to be optimistic and hopeful. But everyone around me only seems to see the fact that I am a burden. Even I am overwhelmed by the fact that I'm a burden. I'm a financial and emotional burden. People walk on eggshells around me to avoid triggering me, even when I'm doing better than the norm. I don't think anyone cares for me anymore. I have no friends. I sit in my room most days after a workout and just nap or sit in silence. I take my meds on time. But no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, things never go the way I wish they would.
All I've ever wanted was to be understood. I feel even less understood by everyone now that I know that my sister hates me. I have two other siblings (29M and soon to be 19F) who I don't even know if I can trust anymore, since they could secretly be harboring the same feelings as my older sister. I feel awful. My dad caught me sobbing in my room, and I just brushed it off. But deep down inside I'm dying. It hurts so much to know someone I thought I could trust doesn't feel the same way. I love my family. And maybe it's best that I live far away from them once I can. I don't want them to suffer the way I've suffered, or to suffer anything aking to my suffering. If someone has to take all the pain, I want it to be me. I'm just at a loss for how to cope. I'm in so much pain, knowing I truly am the burden I always made myself out to be.
I would never wish depression, anxiety, or an ED on anyone. I would never wish the reality of my family on anyone. But if my family could just spend a day or week inside my head, maybe they'd understand that this whole pretending to be happy and playing to role of daughter is a hell of a lot harder than I make it look. Dealing with the demons I do is not easy. I am lucky. I am still alive and fighting. I am not physically or otherwise mentally disabled. I. Am. Lucky. But today, right now, I don't feel so lucky to be where I am, to be who I am. I just want to cry until I can't. Here's to hoping all of you are doing even a little better than I am right now. Thanks for reading.
submitted by ffitzpatrick00
to offmychest [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 rerun_rewind My (M30) gf (F31) offered her ex husband our couch to sleep on for a week and a half. I feel uncomfortable with this, she says I shouldn’t be. Are my feelings valid?
I am not sure where to even start with this but I will try my best. To get deeper into the scenario, I am dating a divorced mother (or one going through the divorce). We have been together three years. She has an eight year old son with her ex husband who is in the military. He told her he will be coming to visit in late June for about a week and a half. My gf said he would like to come here to see his son, and she offered our couch because she is trying to be civil with him. Since they are still legally married and he’s in the service he has to send her money every month. She is worried if he has to get a hotel for a week and a rental car that he won’t be able to give her money for the month and it will financially hurt her. I understand where she is coming from not wanting to fuck with his finances cause it fucks with how much she gets. I just can’t help but to feel uneasy about my gf’s basically husband (until the divorce is finalized) coming to stay with us. I know he’s here for his kid, but it’s still super unsettling. She said she understands why it’s unsettling for me but it shouldn’t be. She said she loves me and she wants to be with me. I asked my parents if I can stay with them for a week while he’s here and they said yes (love them to death). But she said that would be rude of me because I would be leaving her here all alone with him and her son. But she was the one who offered him a place to stay? She wants me to be civil with him. Apparently he said he can be civil with me but doesn’t wanna be friends. I don’t wanna be friends or be civil with my gf ex husband. I could care less to even meet him. So Reddit-or men who have been in the same boat. How did you get over it? Is my situation unique? Any red flags I should look out for while this is going down? Is our relationship over? I don’t want it to be I do love her- but I need to stay in reality and not get played. Any advice is appreciated.
submitted by rerun_rewind
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 Heavy-Donkey921 Guide me Grasshoppers
Just looking for some advice/guidance. I just started diving into my finances seriously within the past few months. 38yom. Single. Last year gross earning 76k. This year I’m on pace for 88-90k. Govt job. Schedule is made out for the year so it’s easy to estimate hours/pay. In April I took 22k and threw it at my remaining house debt to become debt free. House value is 170k. 401k is at $91,619.64. Currently maxed out HSA is at $28,401.75 I just began a Roth in April and it sits at $5166.42. Will max that out next check. Separate brokerage accounts of $6,767.52. Savings $7,000 Checking $656 My goal would be to retire by 55. I have 12yrs in. My current high five monthly income would set me up for $3,163 if everything stayed the same by 55. I also own a boat $6k and a 2006 suv worth maybe 4-5k.
Living expense Monthly Very low cost of living area. Electric/gas bill $180 in summer to $300 in winter. Hulu $8.99 Phone $47 Internet $54.99 Garbage $30 Car insurance $67.
Food. I don’t spend much on food. We get a meal at work And I eat plenty of fish and venison that I rarely go to the store. If I do it’s usually just for potatoes or rice. Never eat out at restaurants. Sometimes dominoes or McDonald. But maybe twice a month.
I’m thinking I could maybe save another 20k ish a year beside my 401k/Roth?
Oh and all my investments are in vti,vtg,VOO, tgt retirement,qqq,schd
Just curious what I can do better? Are my goals reasonable ?
submitted by Heavy-Donkey921
to Fire [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 AutoModerator [Download Course] Allie Bjerk – Tiny Offer Lab (Genkicourses.site)
| || | submitted by AutoModerator to GetAny_Courses [link] [comments]
Get the course here: [Download Course] Allie Bjerk – Tiny Offer Lab (Genkicourses.site)
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Please be aware that our courses do not include community access. This is due to the fact that we do not have the authority to manage this feature. Despite our desire to incorporate this aspect, it is, unfortunately, unfeasible.
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2023.06.05 05:27 Charming_Target6430 How can I control myself as a parent.
Lets get this out of the way. Do I feel like shiiidd? Yes, dont need to he remained. Dont consider my self as a bad parent but definitely feels like once a month. Puertorican parent, this is not a justification but you might get where I'm coming from.
I have a 8y/o boy with autism 2. Most of the time I have the entire world patience but sometimes dont. Im an easy going dad/parent. I let my kids (girl 5 and boy 8 autism) be free even more than they should be, they can be them and I'm completely happy for that. ..... but sometimes times when I'm have to be strict I'm strict and my word WILL be respected!
My boy which I understand his behavior, I know when it's autism and when he is trying to test me and disobey. And I ain't one of this parent that let their kids go over their parent. If he win it he will get it. Most of the time I repeat myself over five time with each and individual things. In this case was mouthwash I repeated over 3 times to him to stop drinking mouthwash. (Also this goes with toothpaste as well for once or twice a week) I felt so tested that I snapped and felt so bad because I shouldn't have hit him that hard... but like I said, he want to test and try and he will know and pay respect the hard way if that his choice. He will know the real deal in this house. He got the message because he stood still for 2 hours.
I'm not bragging over being strict nor much less being abusive, because I know that is not a brag. I completely feel like shid. If you want to call me a bad parent, I guess you are welcome.
How can I deal with this situation. It's not easy for me. I'm definitely not going to let him go over me. If I have to be a bad parent I guess I will be. I know I'm not alone with this kind of situations.
submitted by Charming_Target6430
to Parenting [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 DemonCatthrowaway Constant Unprovoked BITING
If this cross-post isn't allowed here please let me know, but I really need help. I have a 1 year 2 month old cat named Sam. I have him since he was 3 months old. He bites me unprovoked constantly. I am at my wits end with this, I don't know why he keeps biting me and I don't know how to fix it. He actually just bit me a few minutes ago, I cleaned up my bleeding hand, sobbed about it to my husband, and then I found this sub.
Some background I guess: He was always a biter, but I thought it was because he was a kitten and because I wasn't respecting his boundaries (I wanted to snuggle with him. He did not). I learned his cues of when he's uncomfortable and about to bite and backed off. Which is all the time, he doesn't like being touched at all. But for months now he will bite me unprovoked. Like I'll be sleeping and he'll attack me, or sitting at my desk and he'll bite. I'll be playing with him and he'll go past the toy and bite my arm. Like I cannot stress enough, I'm not screwing with the cat or depriving him of anything, he just bites me for no reason.
In no particular order I have tried positive reinforcement with treats, distracting with a toy, clicker training, putting him in a different room when he bites, getting hundreds of dollars worth of new toys and "environment enhancements", scheduling when to play with him throughout the day, ignoring him, giving him extra attention, giving him time outs, the Feliway optimum calming pheromones, CBD treats, food for hyper cats, feeding him at night, feeding him in the morning, leaving food out constantly, the vet recommended more play and more toys so I did that, he also has Sam on 5mg of Prozac daily, I even used the freaking spray bottle just praying Sam would leave me alone.
There are no (certified) cat behaviorist in my area. I'd get a virtual one but have no idea if it'll be worth the cost. Google just tells me I need to play with him more. I've read countless articles provided by my vet on how to stop aggressive behavior, I feel like I tried everything and nothing. is. working.
I know Sam will never be an affectionate cat, if he wants to never interact with me again I'll be happy with that. I am honestly scared to be in the same room as him because of this. He's locked in the bathroom right now (with food, water, litter, don't worry) because I was sleeping and he just jumped on the bed and attacked me.
Please give me something I haven't tried. Once my vet is open tommrrow I'll give them a call, but I can't help feeling like a failure for wanting to drug him into a zombie to make him leave me alone. Please someone tell me I'm doing something wrong and this can be fixed.
submitted by DemonCatthrowaway
to CatTraining [link] [comments]
2023.06.05 05:27 wahchewie They're interesting electronics. Such nostalgia in a small package
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So interesting how these little boards hold so much nostalgia. ( and grime, look at the cotton tip on second photo) I was particularly careful with S3 because they're so damn expensive and precious 😂 but the boards seem quite tough and well built, compared to some boards I work with now. For passing interest, look how miniature the EA cartridge is, it's practically all air inside! submitted by wahchewie to SEGAGENESIS [link] [comments]