Ok I need real, genuine feedback from people who may have some background with this stuff. If you have a friend or work colleague, give them a shout and ask their opinion. My proposed argument may be reaching, but if this works it just might be a slam dunk.
The premise is that people posting screenshots of your profile pics is a HIPAA violation under U.S. law which in recent years has been updated to include what's called Personal Health Information (PHI). PHI covers the usual stuff like medical history, medications, etc., but what it also covers is a patient's pictures. Some medical providers take pics of their patients usually for recordkeeping purposes for the patients file. I know this has been the case for my own children with some providers we've been to in the past.
Seems like a stretch to argue that for dating profile pics right? Well my thinking is if even just one adult person, who has been posted to any AWDTSG group, also has a picture at any medical provider for their patient file, then this constitutes a violation of that person's PHI. It doesn't have to be the exact same picture in the patients medical record. Remember when a person posts their pics to a social media site or dating app, they are providing consent for their pics to be posted and that consent also means they are either the legal owner of the pics or an authorized representative of the actual owner. Women posting pics of men in these groups obviously does not constitute consent
Let me go into a little more detail. Check out this link for 42 USC 290dd-2 relating to the confidentiality of patient records for substance abuse disorders.
https://www.ecfr.gov/current/title-42/chapter-I/subchapter-A/part-2
Scroll down to section 2.11, patient identifying information, which includes a photograph. All patients have rights which includes the rights to revoke the use of their photos at any time. This isn't the DMCA argument that I and others have made before, this is a totally different approach. This argument isnt making a copyright claim at all, rather if you look like the person in a photo on a medical record, and also look like the person posted in one of the AWDTSG groups, the argument is that both Facebook the company AND the person posting the pics are in violation of HIPAA privacy rule.
Violations are structured in tiers, 1-4. with both minimum and maximum dollar amounts per violation. Check this link out for specific details of violation penalties. Scroll down to civil and criminal penalties sections.
https://www.ama-assn.org/practice-management/hipaa/hipaa-violations-enforcement
Lastly, remember, HIPAA isn't just for healthcare providers either. For example if a persons pics got posted on Instagram of them in alcohol rehab, attorneys have an easy slam dunk to sue for damages. The link we are trying to establish here is that a persons pics of themselves posted on these groups can be considered PHI due to an also existing patient photo of that same person.
Thoughts?

I'm looking for articles or research, or even a documentary, that goes into the history of sleep training, especially in Europe and America, but I'm also interested in what other cultures and geographical regions do currently, or historically. Bonus if it's in the context of attachment. I have a bunch of random anecdotal knowledge, but I am very curious about more comprehensive knowledge.
For example, I've heard Dr Gabor Mate say in an interview that his mother journaled about letting him cry at night because the pediatrician told her to, in 1940's Hungary. I've read an article dated to 1980's (or maybe 90's) about Chinese culture, where in cities, people were encouraged to leave their babies in daycare round the clock, and the babies just came home wednesdays and sundays. That article doesn't reference specific sleep training though. I've seen references to children on farms all sleeping in the same bed, and the baby would sleep in a crib in the parent's room.
These are all random occurrences, and I have no idea if it's representative of what was normal for the time/location. I want to gain a better perspective of how common certain practices were, and how they potentially feed into modern parenting and sleep training culture.
I have a 22mo who isn't sleep trained, and I'm not interested in sleep training him, but I have family members who like to make comments about it. I usually say something like, "Plenty of people don't sleep train, and their kids turn out fine," or "Sleep training is a leftover from when everyone lived in a rural setting and had to crank babies out and have them grow up as quickly as possible so there were more hands to help around the farm." But I really don't know what I'm talking about. I would love to have actually accurate information when I'm having these conversations, and be able to provide sources to my well-intentioned, but pushy relatives. I'm also just a curious person and all these conversations have made me start genuinely wondering about it.

Here's a summary of a lot of information I gathered about K-pop history and how I think changes in political relations between Korea and other countries ended up affecting the current K-pop scene.
Basically, from the beginning, K-pop was thought of as an export product. K-pop's first expansion was into Japan with Boa and TVXQ. Then K-pop infiltrated China and the SEA. But despite coming first in Japan, K-pop's main focus for most of the 2000s and at least half of the 2010s was China. No wonder SM's first foreign idol was a Chinese.
What happened was that over the years the political relations between China and South Korea deteriorated, to the point that in 2016 a process of distancing between the two countries began, which ended up leading to the banning, or at least restrictions of good part of Korean entertainment, mainly K-pop and K-dramas. Until today, for example Korean idols cannot promote in Chinese territory, which also ended the possibility of K-pop concerts in China.
Then we come to 2017 and we have two events that were fundamental to the success of K-pop today. First we had TWICE's debut in Japan, which ended up resulting in the Japanese public's interest in K-pop again. As far as I know, K-pop has been weak in Japan in the years leading up to 2017, but TWICE's wild success has brought interest in K-pop back. No wonder, TWICE members are credited with improving Japanese-Korean relations.
In the same year of 2017, on the other side of the world, we had BTS exploding in the US, and across the West, with DNA, making them the first K-pop group to truly conquer the North American market. The following year, in 2018, BLACKPINK also achieved success in the west with DDDD, which brought even more attention to K-pop from western audiences.
In 2018, the fourth generation of K-pop began and this generation, like any other, was strongly influenced by the previous generation, and this can be clearly seen by the directions that the K-pop market took from 2018 onwards. Korea and China, we saw a decrease in the number of Chinese idols, while with the increase of interest in K-pop in Japan and the West, we saw an increase in Japanese idols and English-speaking idols.
From then on, we had an ever-increasing growth of K-pop on the global stage, especially during the pandemic years, but which remains firm until today. Now in 2023 the market value of the main K-pop companies (HYBE, JYP, SM, YG) combined have increased considerably compared to last year. And, not randomly, the two companies with the best performance today are HYBE and JYP, which are the two companies that invest the most in content for Japan and the US, which are the two largest music markets in the world today.
My point is: just as K-pop's withdrawal from the Chinese market is due to the political withdrawal from China and Korea, I believe that the strength of K-pop currently in the Japanese and American market directly reflects the political rapprochement between Japan. , Korea and USA. Japan and South Korea have a history of political friction that dates back to the beginning of the last century, as a result of the process of colonization of imperial Japan over Korea. But despite the historic conflict, currently the relationship between the countries is more peaceful, largely because of the relationship that both countries have with the US. After World War II, both Japan and China were occupied by the USA, much of the American musical influence on Korean and Japanese music comes from that period as well. And in recent years both Japan and Korea have strengthened their political relations with the US and also with each other. And I believe this is reflected in the rapprochement of Asian popular culture with North American popular culture that has happened in recent years, especially in relation to Korean culture.
Since the beginning of the decade we have had the first South Korean film to win an Oscar, BTS being the first Korean group to be nominated for a grammy, the most watched series on Netflix, Round 6 being a South Korean series. In addition to K-pop as a whole having gained more space in the American market in recent years, with several K-pop groups participating in music festivals in the country, signing contracts with American record companies, etc.
I would like to know your opinion now, do you think that the rapprochement between the USA, Japan and Korea is related to the strengthening of K-pop in the two biggest music markets in the world? Is all information in my text correct? If not, could you tell me where I went wrong?

I don't know but I want to share a memory that resurfaced just today.
On June 6th, I marked my 13rd years since the death of my very first love, Irene. We met and fell in love (the typical teenagers love at first sight) in 2005 when we were just 13yrs old student. We've been together for 5yrs before her incident. We were a LdR and I had to flight all-around-the-world to reach. It was my longest flight ever (till last year). I didn't move from my seat even during the last leg (8hrs long haul flight). I made it in time for just one last farewell.
Today it's my day off so I decided to check at my old cp. I have the habit to keep them all. A nokia N97 caught my attention. To my surprise it worked once I plugged it. I totally forgot that phone. I couldn't stop smiling looking at the wallpaper picture. It was her with a fansign (back in the days, it was a very common things, especially in the Philippines) saying "I'M CUTEST!".
I digged into this phone, literally a time vault. I read all my texts, full of abbreviation (jejemon style) and then...
I reas her last text.
"Mahal (it means "my love/honey"), I can't believe I'm gonna graduate as a nurse. I'M SO EXCITED! Do you have anything to say to me ;) Because... Mum told me... YOU'RE OFFICIALLY A PARAMEDIC! <3<3<3. I love you! I'm so sad you won't be my prom date T.T but once our papers are ok, we're gonna be fight together in frontline, aren't we? You in the ambulance as first responder, me in ER. So exciting! Love you, take care!
P.s Oh, I even heard from a bird you applied to become a mountain SAR operator! I hate you! Why didn't you tell me? :P"
I was so mad about the p.s! Anyway my plan was to surprise her during the graduation ceremony and I should had proposed full dressed with my operative uniform.
Unfortunately, life can have a twisted and dark humour.
Few days later, her sister texted me saying:" KUYAAA! WE NEED YOU HERE ASAP! ATE NEEDS YOU, SHE GOT CAUGHT IN AN INCIDENT... PLEASE COME! T.T"
The rest was history.
A big hug to everyone of you guys and thanks for reading❤️

Thanks to everyone who participated in this poll yesterday:
https://www.reddit.com/golf/comments/143ezd7/what_of_8_foot_putts_could_you_make_at_your_best/
Also, I do apologize for not providing a "30% or under option". It became apparent quickly that I should have, but if it's possible to alter a poll, I couldn't figure out how. Here's the result of the 513 votes with % of total:
40% (or under presumably) - 52% (269)
50% - 27% (140)
60% - 8% (41)
70% - 6.6% (34)
80% - 5.6% (29)
I'm currently reading (well technically listening to) the book "Every Shot Counts", which covers kind of the history of both ShotLink and the Strokes Gained statistic. The gentleman who wrote it I believe was involved in the creation of the stat. Without going into too much detail (and obviously spoilers ahead), Strokes Gained is a superior way to evaluate a player over the old fairways hit, GIR, and putts per round stats.
Many of you already knew that pros make right around 50% of their 8 foot putts. However, part of the point of this poll was to see how good (or not) a random selection of golfers thought they were capable of getting. The book provides some interesting numbers, keep in mind the publish date is 2014 so the evaluation period is 2004-2012.
Looking at any individual year, a few players are above the 60% mark for 8 foot makes. I found that VERY interesting because the book stated that the best 8 foot make % from that 8 year period was 57% (Luke Donald). My theory would be that because they were often below 50 (sometimes as low as 30) 8 foot putt attempts for a given year, it's possible to be above 60% makes for a season, but close to impossible for a long stretch of years.
My takeaway from that is that you aren't likely to gain a lot of strokes practicing putts inside 10 feet as long as you're not terrible at it right now. If you're average at putting and a mid to high handicapper, you shouldn't spend a lot of time practicing putting. There should be lower hanging fruit if the goal is to lower your score.
Also interesting was that the average non pro is a better putter than most would guess. In a set of 10 rounds, a 90 average player would beat a tour pro on strokes gained 1 out of 10 times. An average 80 player 2 out of 10 rounds, and a scratch golfer would out putt the pro on average 3 out of 10 rounds.
My takeaway is that those who think they can't putt pretty darn well, even compared to a tour pro, given plenty of practice time (and maybe also at least a little guidance), are probably wrong. If you worked hard on your putting, you probably could get to 50% makes on 8 footers. That doesn't mean it's worth it for a mid to high handicapper though. The primary difference between any 2 players, whether it's a 90 player and an 80 player or an 80 player vs. a pro, is shots that are NOT putts.

Here's a summary of a lot of information I gathered about K-pop history and how I think changes in political relations between Korea and other countries ended up affecting the current K-pop scene.
Basically, from the beginning, K-pop was thought of as an export product. K-pop's first expansion was into Japan with Boa and TVXQ. Then K-pop infiltrated China and the SEA. But despite coming first in Japan, K-pop's main focus for most of the 2000s and at least half of the 2010s was China. No wonder SM's first foreign idol was a Chinese.
What happened was that over the years the political relations between China and South Korea deteriorated, to the point that in 2016 a process of distancing between the two countries began, which ended up leading to the banning, or at least restrictions of good part of Korean entertainment, mainly K-pop and K-dramas. Until today, for example Korean idols cannot promote in Chinese territory, which also ended the possibility of K-pop concerts in China.
Then we come to 2017 and we have two events that were fundamental to the success of K-pop today. First we had TWICE's debut in Japan, which ended up resulting in the Japanese public's interest in K-pop again. As far as I know, K-pop has been weak in Japan in the years leading up to 2017, but TWICE's wild success has brought interest in K-pop back. No wonder, TWICE members are credited with improving Japanese-Korean relations.
In the same year of 2017, on the other side of the world, we had BTS exploding in the US, and across the West, with DNA, making them the first K-pop group to truly conquer the North American market. The following year, in 2018, BLACKPINK also achieved success in the west with DDDD, which brought even more attention to K-pop from western audiences.
In 2018, the fourth generation of K-pop began and this generation, like any other, was strongly influenced by the previous generation, and this can be clearly seen by the directions that the K-pop market took from 2018 onwards. Korea and China, we saw a decrease in the number of Chinese idols, while with the increase of interest in K-pop in Japan and the West, we saw an increase in Japanese idols and English-speaking idols.
From then on, we had an ever-increasing growth of K-pop on the global stage, especially during the pandemic years, but which remains firm until today. Now in 2023 the market value of the main K-pop companies (HYBE, JYP, SM, YG) combined have increased considerably compared to last year. And, not randomly, the two companies with the best performance today are HYBE and JYP, which are the two companies that invest the most in content for Japan and the US, which are the two largest music markets in the world today.
My point is: just as K-pop's withdrawal from the Chinese market is due to the political withdrawal from China and Korea, I believe that the strength of K-pop currently in the Japanese and American market directly reflects the political rapprochement between Japan. , Korea and USA. Japan and South Korea have a history of political friction that dates back to the beginning of the last century, as a result of the process of colonization of imperial Japan over Korea. But despite the historic conflict, currently the relationship between the countries is more peaceful, largely because of the relationship that both countries have with the US. After World War II, both Japan and China were occupied by the USA, much of the American musical influence on Korean and Japanese music comes from that period as well. And in recent years both Japan and Korea have strengthened their political relations with the US and also with each other. And I believe this is reflected in the rapprochement of Asian popular culture with North American popular culture that has happened in recent years, especially in relation to Korean culture.
Since the beginning of the decade we have had the first South Korean film to win an Oscar, BTS being the first Korean group to be nominated for a grammy, the most watched series on Netflix, Round 6 being a South Korean series. In addition to K-pop as a whole having gained more space in the American market in recent years, with several K-pop groups participating in music festivals in the country, signing contracts with American record companies, etc.
I would like to know your opinion now, do you think that the rapprochement between the USA, Japan and Korea is related to the strengthening of K-pop in the two biggest music markets in the world? Is all information in my text correct? If not, could you tell me where I went wrong?

Friend of mine is looking to invite their in-law to US. The latest date they got for visa interview is September 2024.
What you need to do: You have to reschedule the appointment and get a date in 2023. Yes, this year, 2023. Not 2024.
How will you do it: You will regularly check the scheduling website, telegram group, Facebook group for open dates and reschedule the appointment.
What will you be provided: Username and password to login and reschedule
What will you need: Preferably a laptop and access to good internet service.
Once the job is done you will get your money. If the job is not done, no money. You will have timeframe of 30 days.
FAQ:

1. US Embassy agadi tannai chan reschedule garne manche haru, why don't you try them?
   1. Because they are ASS. They said they will do it and it's been 90 days and no progress.
2. Why don't you do it yourself.
   1. I do not have time.
3. Why 15K
   1. US embassy agadi ko pasal is charging only Rs 10K. I am willing to give 50% more for the job done.
4. Paisa sure dincha ni?
   1. Sure. I have a long history in Nepal*. You can check my profile, I've even donated to Balen. I keep my words:* https://www.reddit.com/Nepal/comments/uy9eaf/a_bet_is_a_bet_i_donated_rs_20k_to_our_new_mayo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
5. Why 30 days?
   1. If you don't get it done in 30 days, someone else will get the opportunity.

I’ve been using Hinge for almost 8 months now. I had quick success (so I thought) in the first few months with a woman I went on 3 dates with, then nothing, then a date, then nothing, then a date, and she just cancelled on me…
I realize a fair amount of things could play into someone canceling. But goddamnit is it annoying when it happens again, and again, and again.
I truly have no idea what I did or if I did anything wrong this time. It’s maddening how easy it seems for literally everyone else in my life to find someone and get married.

pre-tl;dr, booked a "refundable" flight, cancelled it, been fighting with Chase for a way to use it ever sense. Looking for how to proceed.
​

• Last year I booked a $1500 refundable overseas flight through chase travel. Used chase travel as it said the flight was refundable, where as booking through the airline directly had no such wording.
• Ended up needing to cancel the flight. Chase Travel said the flight wasn't actually refundable
• Complained, escalated, etc, a supervisor was finally after hours on the phone able to get me a travel credit. Gave me a travel credit number to reference, says i have to book by 6/1/23. Great.
• Try to use travel credit on a different flight. Discover after many more hours on the phone with chase travel supervisors that the travel credit isn't really a full credit, its actually 2 smaller credits (the original flight was 2 one-way flights and not a round trip??? :shrug:. Basically those 2 credits have to originate in the same place the original flight had to originate, so, basically, I have to fly to the same country and back that I originally wanted to. Fine, whatever.
• Try to rebook flight back to original country. Am told that no, you can't just book by 6/1, you actually have to FLY by 6/1. Complain again to supervisor. Finally get someone sympathetic, they spend 3.5 hours reading old history of this case, eventually through much back and forth manage to book me on a flight on the dates I want to the destination. Very apologetic. Great success.
• Get an email from chase travel: This is regarding with your flight reservation kindly give us a call back as soon as possible so we can arrange your travel schedule.... wtf
• Call them back, the flight has been moved UP to next week from september, i ask why, "we were not able to honor the previously booked flight"

Literally losing my mind over this. Have been on the phone with them at least 6 hours total so far. Do I just cut my loss and run?

I’ve seen bodies mashed, crushed, dismembered, stuffed into suitcases, blackened like meat on a grill, floating, bloating, with flies swarming their flesh and maggots wriggling out of their eyes. I have, in short, an intimacy with death.
But nothing prepared me for the horror in cabin 4044.
I stared at my own smoldering corpse, into the blackened sockets of my melted eyes, and ice raked my spine and splintered my bones, shivering all the way down to my frozen fingertips.
You knew this day would come, whispered a voice in my head. And then, as my nose wrinkled, Ugh, I smell like bacon.
Giggles. Oh dear. Not beneficial. Couldn’t I try to approach my death with some dignity? No? Well… fine. Ignoring my own bubbling hysteria, I held my napkin over my nostrils and leaned in. Cross-legged in a lotus position, hands cradled and thumbs touching, crispy me (hehe) held the pose of a meditating monk. From the liquor bottles scattered around the burnt wreckage as well as the pose, I’d started the fire myself. But what induced such madn—
Glowing white light suddenly emanated from the blackened sockets. I gasped, tumbling backwards over the coffee table.
When I sat up, the light was gone.
It did not reappear during the half hour I charged my phone, keeping one leery eye on my corpse while I used the ship’s spotty wifi for research.
A Mysterious Contagion
According to Google, the worst cruise disaster in modern times involved the partial capsizing of a vessel after a captain’s error led to a rock tearing open the hull. Of the four thousand passengers, 34 drowned.
Another ship infamously dubbed the “poop cruise” had its engines catch fire, and passengers were stranded for nearly a week on board without electricity or toilet facilities.
But the Seastar was not destined for any ocean or weather related incident, but rather, a contagion. And while coronavirus and norovirus have both afflicted cruise ships in recent years, no virus—not even rabies—could explain the self-mutilation. To say nothing of the virulence. A mortality rate of 100%? That was unheard of in nature. There should be some survivors, if only by happenstance.
Or is it because…
A terrible chill spread up the flesh of my arms, and a thought lodged like an ice pick in my skull: What if the doom of the Azure Seastar isn’t happenstance—but deliberate? Are there no survivors because someone doesn’t want there to be?
Numb at the implication, I set down my phone. But how? Why? A thousand passengers and crew… If there was someone planning such a disaster, how would I identify them? And why would anyone commit such an atrocity? My gut tightened, and I got up and ventured out to the upper decks.
Deck 9
Cold. Cold. Cold. The chill in my bones deepened with each hand I brushed. Passengers glared as I fumbled around, dismissing me as either blind or mentally feeble. The blindness was somewhat accurate—I couldn’t see under the electric lighting in the swanky interior, since my eyes were seeing six days in the future, when the Seastar would be plunged into blackout. I depended on my phone’s feeble flashlight as I navigated the sea of guests around the bar and lounge areas. But no matter how many arms and hands I bumbled into—COLD!
With no accidental survivors, I was becoming more and more convinced the Seastar’s doom must be deliberate, but I was still very much in the dark—literally and figuratively—about why.
The most useful discovery of the evening came after my collision with a heavyset older man whose drink I spilled. Noticing me sweeping around my phone’s pitiful beam and assuming I’d lost something, he offered to lend me a more powerful flashlight from his cabin.
“It’s one of those high powered ones if you want it.” He smiled, and I stared, every hair on my neck standing on end.
“Uh… Something on my face?” His smile turned into a confused frown under my phone’s light.
“N-no. Yes, a flashlight would be very helpful, thank you.”
“This way. Name’s John, by the way.” His grin returned.
Oh God—I’d recognized him. Glass chewing man. He had a name now.
I am ashamed to admit that I tried not to speak to him too much on the way to his cabin, despite his doing me a kindness. It’s so much harder to face death with names and histories attached. I remained standing outside his cabin door, looking incredibly guilty as he emerged and set into my hand the flashlight. When I turned it on, it sent a floodlight straight down the corridor one end to the other. In addition to this useful tool, the encounter brought a critical insight.
His clothes. Glass chewing involved a different outfit. So, the catastrophe would not strike tonight.
Pool deck
After brushing roughly a billion COLD hands, as the overnight crowd began thinning, I took myself out to a lounger (being unwilling to overnight in my cabin wreathed in the fumes of my own chargrilled corpse).
Voices woke me in the dead of night.
The moon and stars offered the only illumination over the pitch sea, and I shambled groggily to the rail. It struck me that the wind had died—the Seastar was stationary.
Out on the pale peaks of waves, a rescue craft bobbed up and down.
“Looks like some idiot went overboard,” complained a voice behind me.
A cluster of passengers had gathered. One—with the authority of an experienced cruiser—mentioned the possibility of a suicide jumper. “It shouldn’t affect our itinerary much,” declared the man. “These things happen at sea, you know. After the rescue, he or she—let’s call them Passenger X—will be taken to the infirmary and monitored by security…”
I didn’t hear the rest of his words, because I was too busy smacking my forehead as I burst, “The INFIRMARY!” Good fucking gracious, was my brain already barbecue? I suspected a contagion, yet hadn’t thought to search the infirmary? Snatching up my flashlight, I headed downstairs, but the lower decks were cordoned off.
A jovial crewman explained that passenger access was restricted during rescue operations.
“Also, it’s three in the morning,” he added, sipping coffee from a styrofoam cup. “The infirmary will open—I think around eight?”
“Which deck?”
“Deck two.” He gladly explained the layout when I asked. The lower decks also included crew quarters, a crew lounge, mess hall, the engine room, kitchens, food storage, the “highway” used for quickly trafficking trolleys from one end of the ship to the other, the infirmary, various machinery rooms, a brig, a morgue—“We mostly use it for like, chilling flowers and stuff like that though,” he added with a grin. There was also a third staircase near the stern of the ship—the aft stairwell—used regularly only by staff but opened to passengers in cases of emergency.
As he rattled off this list, I could feel myself plunging deeper into despair. This ship was so enormous, and so much of what lay below was off limits to passengers. Furthermore, there were no windows below! How was I going to make my way in the blackout? Even with John’s flashlight, the prospect was daunting.
But first things first, Cass, I told myself. The infirmary.
Infirmary
At 8am sharp I stepped into the infirmary. The waiting room was as ordinary as they come, complete with boring magazines and cheap office chairs and—because it was deep in the interior—pitch dark to my sleep-deprived eyes.
“Morning, Sweetie! How can I help you today?” The secretary at the front desk tipped her head toward me, revealing a glimpse of another face beneath my flashlight—mouth gaping and mangled, every tooth pulled out. Blissfully unaware that she was sharing her chair with her own corpse, the secretary smiled and gave me a clipboard of paperwork for check in.
While I filled out the forms by flashlight, footsteps shuffled near the desk, and the secretary struck up a conversation with someone I assumed was a nurse. My ears pricked when they gossiped about last night.
“… did you hear about the rescue? When they pulled him out of the water, he wasn’t breathing...”
I pretended to be engrossed in the forms.
“… As soon as they revived him, he started screaming and screaming.”
“Oh my god… seriously?”
“Yeah, and he was like, super aggressive. They had to sedate him.”
“Oh my god…”
“It’s really weird… they’re saying he might have come from another ship, and it might’ve been, like… days… that he was out on the water!”
So this Passenger X who was pulled in last night had just been drifting out on the ocean? He wasn’t a jumper? And he was “screaming and screaming”—like, perhaps, someone maddened? I was about to abandon my forms and search for this Passenger X when the secretary all but gave me a heart attack by materializing in front of me out of the dark. She took the paperwork and informed me the nurse was ready. I was directed to a small examination room—one of three, I noted as I swept my beam around the infirmary. Examining tables, chairs, computers. No sign of any screaming passenger. Where would they have brought him?
The nurse, a young woman in a hijab, asked me the typical questions, typing my responses into a computer with a cracked, dead screen.
“Is he all right? The man who was rescued?” I asked. “Was he drifting long?”
She responded pertly, “We’re still trying to ascertain. But don’t worry, he’s being helped—um….” Her brow scrunched as she shone a light into each of my eyes.
Of course. I forgot to warn her.
“That’s so strange…” she murmured. “Are you wearing contact lenses?”
“No. My eyes are very black. Even under a flashlight they don’t reflect any light. They’ve been that way since I was four years old. I was dead for nearly an hour from drowning, but revived, and everything came back normal except for my eyes.” I’d always believed my horrific visions were the result of my near-death experience, as if I wasn’t supposed to come back, and brought a little bit of death with me, just in my eyes.
“Wow! What a wild story!” The nurse exclaimed.
“You have no idea,” I replied, looking at her corpse peering out at me from under the examination table, all jammed around the base.
A knock on the door cut our exam short before I could warn her (not that it would make any difference). She asked me to wait for a few moments and stepped out.
When she did not immediately return, I slipped away in search of Passenger X.
Highway
The moment I stepped out of the infirmary and away from the nearby elevator lounge, it became evident I’d left the passenger areas. All veneer of luxury was stripped away, leaving bare walls interrupted only by occasional stacks of boxes. The flashlight’s wide beam swept along the massive corridor that I was guessing was the “highway.” My footsteps resounded on concrete. Nothing but sterile, windowless white—or at least it had been white, once.
I tried not to look too closely at the crimson streaking the walls or the corpses I stepped over. The origin of the contagion was definitely down here. Even through the napkin held over my nose, I could taste death here—
Hello? What was this?
In one section of the corridor, the walls and floor had rippled. Almost as if a shockwave had left indentations, bending and shattering the concrete. But what could have done that?
The lights flickered.
I froze.
It wasn’t my flashlight’s beam. That remained steady. The lights—the overhead lights—flickered, casting the hall in blinking flashes of crimson streaks and white walls.
Then the lights came on.
All the bodies vanished.
“Oh,” I said, blinking against the sudden brightness. “Oh.” The smell was gone, too. No scent of death. Though there was something else. A strangely metallic, tangy smell. Like lightning and copper.
I shut off my flashlight, turning a slow circle as I gawked at the stark white walls, the flat gray floor, the dazzling fluorescent lighting so bright it almost blinded me. It struck me that I was seeing the ship right now. Not six days in the future, but NOW, before the blackout, before the outbreak. The same whitewashed hallway as all the other passengers saw.
Why? What had happened to my vision? Had I lost my special sight? Or—
Someone was standing in the corridor.
I froze.
The hairs on my neck prickled, and a knot of dread twisted my gut.
The man stood halfway down the highway, slouched and bedraggled. His clothes were crushed and faded, hanging off him like from hangers of bone. His limp hair draped in messy curls around his unshaven face. And his eyes—those eyes! The same eyes I’d seen looking at me from the deep end of a public swimming pool when I was just a child. The same eyes I’d seen staring emptily from John’s glass-chewing corpse, and from the mangled nurse under the table. All the dead have the exact same look in their eyes. One glance at those pale blue orbs—
This man was dead. I was certain of it.
Yet he was standing.
“You,” I said. “You… are you the passenger who—”
The dead man’s lips spread, baring teeth in what might have been a sick imitation of a grin, or a grimace.
“HEY!!!”
I jumped as a voice called out behind me.
An officer in a security uniform strode out from an unmarked door, eyes on the dead man. The security officer said, “Ma’am, stay back.” His gaze never left the dead man. “Sir, if you could please come with me—”
“No!” I cried. “Don’t!”
But the security officer was already marching forward, and the dead man’s hands lifted in stiff parody of surrender. He turned and began shuffling away under the officer’s escort. And then—his teeth bared. Suddenly the dead man had his arm around the officer, mouth clamping on his ear as the officer howled. He was eating him—no, tongue wriggling—licking him?
—whispering?
The officer shoved the dead man aside and collapsed against the wall. I rushed forward, but skidded to a halt as the dead man’s grinning face turned toward me. Terror seized me at the sudden revelation that I was next. He took a wobbly step—
The lights shut off.
Swearing, I fumbled for my flashlight. Switched on the beam. Shrieked when it fell across a hand—but it was just the security officer reaching for me, asking, “Hey—hey, are you all right, Ma’am?” He winced, rubbing at his ear like a dog bothered by a whistle only it could hear. Then he said into his phone, “He assaulted me and got away. I’ve got another passenger here—”
The stench wafted back. Gore once again splattered the walls. I was once more seeing six days into the future, and clapped my napkin to my mouth to stop myself from retching at the return of the smell. But I wasn’t really thinking about all that.
No, because my heart slammed my ribs and my breath ripped ragged from my throat, and every hair stood on end as if I’d been struck by lightning. Whatever it was the crew of the Seastar had hauled from the ocean, it certainly hadn’t been living when they “rescued” it. And the proof was in those overhead lights. Merely being in proximity to Passenger X, my vision had been pulled into the present. Like he was a magnet drawing my sight into his field. But if death was the thing my black, lightless eyes usually glimpsed, then what exactly was Passenger X? And if he could affect my vision, not to mention animating a dead man’s corpse… how was I going to have any hope of stopping him?
[Part 1] [Part 2]

Pretty much the title. I’ve (34F) mostly had tumultuous, dramatic and passionate relationships that burn hot and heavy and fizzle out when they get past about 1.5 years. I have grown to expect the holding my breath, waiting for the shoe to drop, responding accordingly to whatever shoe drops, extremely passionate and hot and heavy makeups, and so on. (Ex: cheating, sneaky with phones, flaky, lies, grand gestures to “fix it,” wild sex, etc.).
I’ve spoken with other friends and heard “you’ll know if you’re compatible once you have that major blow up - screaming, fighting, slamming doors.” It always sounded like an unhealthy measure - I had ENOUGH of that growing up with an addict for a sibling. I don’t want to communicate that way with anyone OR have anyone communicate that way with me. My partner (M40) agrees with me on that. So, I can’t judge off that advice… hence being on Reddit!
Fast forward to my current relationship with (6+ months, started a couple week trial in April with living together before his lease is up in fall and have been together ever since). FWIW, we live an hour+ apart, but met just prior to my move. The moving in was fast and convenient, but we both discussed with our therapists and family and decided a trial was smart. I digress.
In this relationship, it feels the opposite of my previous experience. He feels like a partner, we take care of each other, we’re kind, honest, playful and deeply connected. Sex is good and regular (1-2xs a day), albeit a bit more vanilla than what I’d probably want long term. We’ve discussed it and he’s aware and agreed to try some new things. That’s our biggest disagreement of the minds and “conflict” to date, likely as it’s still new.
So - on to my question and the title - what should being in love feel like? Especially interested in those who have a similar history of dating “bad” partners. Did you ever long for the “drama”? Did it make the relationship feel stale long term? Or, did you feel happier and more in love with a softer partnership?
I’m a little worried that the relationship might be “missing” something. But, I can’t discern if it’s because I FEEL like relationships need drama because of my past or if it’s simply that being in a stable relationship that’s healthy is just unfamiliar?
I’d appreciate any perspective or stories that anyone cares to share!

Raven

(Spotlight guest-written by bluelookslikeblue)
Name: Rachel Roth
Created by: Marv Wolfman and George Perez
First Appearance: DC Comics Presents #26
Affiliation: Titans
Previous Affiliations: Teen Titans, Sentinels of Magic, Night Force, Team Wonder, Justice League Dark
Allies: Beast Boy, Nightwing, Donna Troy, Cyborg, Starfire, Arsenal, Tempest, both Wally Wests, Wonder Girl (Cassie Sandsmark), Superboy (Conner Kent), Robin (Tim Drake), Wonder Woman, Shazam, Booster Gold
Powers: Pretty much whatever combination of teleportation, empathic healing, soul-self projection, flight, telepathy, telekinesis, emotional manipulation, mind control, and vaguely defined magical energy the writer feels like that day.

Origins:

Raven’s story begins with her mother, Angela Roth. Angela made the unfortunate decision to join a satanic cult, leading to an even more unfortunate encounter with Trigon, a genocidal demon rapist. One failed abortion/suicide later, Angela and her daughter were taken in by the monks of Azarath, a pacifistic magical realm which accidentally created Trigon in the first place. Taking on Trigon’s daughter was a matter of controversy in Azarath and there was at least one assassination attempt on the infant half-demon. Angela took the name Arella and learned some of the Azarathian mystic arts. The child named Raven was taken to be raised by the Goddess Azar.
Azar determined that Raven could be possessed by Trigon and/or destroy the universe if she lost control of her emotions. Thus, Arella was told to surrender her child to Azar to train and raise. Azar raised Raven in isolation, training her to purge herself of emotion and rarely permitting contact with others including her own mother. The result was a child about as socially well-adjusted as you’d expect someone denied emotions, love, or any contact with kids her own age whatsoever. Upon Azar’s death, Raven’s training fell to Arella. Although mother and daughter eventually grew close, their relationship was somewhat hampered by Raven’s insularity and emotional stuntedness. On her thirteenth birthday, Trigon revealed himself as her father. He tortured her mother and demanded Raven take his place at his side. She refused and lashed out in hatred, her darker side manifesting as her soul-self for the first time. Satisfied that his daughter had inherited his power and rage, Trigon departed, warning that he would return once Raven became a woman.

New Teen Titans:

When Raven was eighteen, Trigon returned to destroy the Earth. Deeming this outcome unacceptable, she implored the priests of Azarath to intervene but they refused, believing it to be a violation of their pacifist beliefs. Moving on to Plan B, she fled to Earth and asked the Justice League for help but was declined as Zatanna sensed Trigon’s taint on her and told her teammates that Raven was probably evil. Refusing to give up, she went to Plan C and haunted the dreams of Dick Grayson - then still Robin - until he agreed to reform the Teen Titans with her chosen members. She was able to convince Donna Troy (then Wonder Girl), Beast Boy (then going by Changeling), and Cyborg to join but was turned down by Wally West (then Kid Flash). Unwilling to take no for an answer at this point, Raven secretly made Wally fall in love with her using her empathic magic, causing him to join. She then led them to the rescue of their final member, the alien warrior Starfire who was captured by Gordanian slavers.
Raven’s early days with the Titans did not go well. Her pacifism made her useless in fights and her refusal to give a straight answer to anything and tendency to disappear immediately upon getting what she needed made her teammates question her trustworthiness. Things were further complicated when the other Titans were killed and Raven had to go back in time with Booster Gold to covertly fix the timeline. Upon Zatanna’s revelation that Raven had turned Wally’s brains to scrambled eggs so he would do her bidding, her teammates decided they had enough and refused to put up with her anymore. To make matters worse, Trigon arrived to destroy the world and easily defeated her estranged teammates. Raven teleported them to Azarath before they could be killed and begged her mother and the priests of Azarath for help but was again declined. When Trigon appeared and once more defeated the Titans, Raven moved on to Plan D and agreed to go with him in exchange for the safety of the Earth and the lives of the Titans. Trigon accepted her offer and took Raven with him to his realm. He then promptly murdered a child and announced his intent to destroy the Earth anyway. Distraught by the loss of her daughter, Arella agreed to take the Titans to Trigon in order to rescue Raven but the teens were defeated again and imprisoned. However, Raven was able to free her teammates and together they were able to weaken Trigon with Arella sacrificing herself to imprison Trigon in another dimension.
Raven enrolled in college and continued to serve with the New Teen Titans despite an awkward and occasionally tense relationship with Wally West, forming an odd friendship with the extroverted and impulsive Starfire. While continuing to espouse pacifism and pursuing non-violence when possible, Raven came to the conclusion that knocking people out with her soul-self, controlling minds, and the occasional act of psychological torture was okay and robots and monsters shouldn’t count anyway and thus proved surprisingly useful in many fights. During this period, the Teen Titans would face off against many supervillains such as Deathstroke, the Brotherhood of Evil, and the Fearsome Five. However, none would prove as troublesome to the young heroes as Brother Blood, whose cunning, charisma, and arcane mastery would put the Titans on the off-foot time and time again. Although Raven would come to be a valued member of the team, Trigon’s corrosive influence led to her gradual physical and mental degradation which was exacerbated by her fear of reaching out to others for help. Eventually, Trigon escaped captivity and almost caused the apocalypse with a corrupted Raven as his minion. The Teen Titans ultimately thwarted Trigon with the help of Raven’s mother and Lilith Clay. Raven’s body was nowhere to be found.
The Titans thought this a bit weird but didn’t make finding her their number one priority. This proved to be a bit of a whoopsie-doodles as she was captured and brainwashed by Brother Blood first. Nightwing would eventually come looking for her but was himself captured. Blood would defeat the Titans and came to the cusp of taking over the world before Raven broke free of his control and stopped him. With Trigon seemingly dead, Brother Blood’s brainwashing purged, and her soul purified, Raven was free to be herself for the first time in her life. Rejoining the Titans, the now-white cloaked Raven was thrilled to finally be free of any malign influence and became the embodiment of sweetness and light. Unfortunately, this sunny outlook was not to last. Kid Flash’s replacement Jericho became evil and caused her to be corrupted by evil spirits. Once more falling to demonic possession, Raven proceeded to engage in various acts of villainy. However, the good part of Raven secretly planted herself in Starfire and helped her friends kill her body and defeat her evil self.

Time Dead:

Raven’s re-purified spirit spent most of this period hanging around as a golden ghost, occasionally assisting the Titans when necessary. For a while Detective Comics Comics forgot she was dead and she served on the Sentinels of Magic alongside various other mystical heroes such as Zatanna, Alan Scott, and Madame Xanadu. Then it remembered and unceremoniously threw her back in the grave without explanation.

A Second Chance at Life:

Raven would be resurrected in a younger body by the new Brother Blood, a sniveling teenage aspiring rapist who was the son of the previous Brother Blood. Brother Blood Junior wanted to force Raven to marry him as part of a plan to end the world. Raven was not fond of this development and tried to escape. Upon being caught and recaptured, her subconscious magically reached out to Beast Boy via a haunting and took control of him in order to lead the latest iteration of the Teen Titans to her location. With his help, she broke free of Brother Blood’s control. Once more plagued by her darker half as a result of Brother Blood’s rituals and believing herself to be a danger to her friends, Raven prepared to depart but was encouraged by Beast Boy to rejoin the Titans, now consisting of himself, fellow veterans Starfire and Cyborg, and new members Cassie Sandsmark, Conner Kent, and Tim Drake. Raven would renounce her pacifism and help her friends mentor the younger members of the team, helping Tim come to terms with the death of his father and encouraging Conner to believe that he was more than the worst parts of his heritage after the discovery that he was a partial clone of Lex Luthor. She would also begin a rocky on and off again romance with Beast Boy. While Raven was drawn to his kindness, her lack of openness and his immaturity would lead to many rough patches in their relationship. Raven attempted to establish a civilian secret identity as Rachel Roth but it is questionable how secret it really was after Beast Boy visited her in the belief nobody would recognize him if he showed up in disguise as a green bear.
When Trigon returned, Raven reunited with her old New Teen Titans teammates and defeated him but was once more nearly overtaken by her evil side. Although able to prevail over her inner darkness, Raven was badly shaken by the experience and became even more insular and withdrawn. Believing herself to be a danger to her friends, she broke up with Beast Boy and attempted to push him away through meanness for his own safety. However, events would see them once again working together mentoring younger heroes on the Teen Titans. The pair would eventually reconcile, with Beast Boy growing in maturity and Raven resolving to get in touch with her emotions and embrace the good in life as well as the bad. Reaffirming their love, the two shared a passionate kiss and were ready to move on, optimistic about their future together.

The New 52:

Because Barry Allen missed his mom, the entire timeline was rebooted and all of the previous history and character development was lost because Dan DiDio said so. In the new timeline, most of her early life was basically the same except this time Rachel was her birth name. However, this time she had to flee Azarath at age sixteen to escape Trigon. While hiding on Earth, Rachel would attempt to do good, using her empathic powers to secretly comfort suffering people but was betrayed by the Phantom Stranger and handed over to her father who renamed her Raven. Forced to become Trigon’s servant, Raven committed various atrocities before being planted on the Teen Titans as a mole. Beast Boy was red for a bit before turning green again for unexplained reasons. Bart was actually Bar-Torr, a war criminal from the future. Raven broke free of her father’s control due to time travel shenanigans. It was a weird time. Following a lot of bad comics, the team disbanded and Raven sought out her mother’s family and enrolled in high school, hoping to reconnect with her human side.

Rebirth:

Due to events featuring the older, white Wally West and a naked blue man, it turned out that five years were erased from the timeline and there was a previous Titans team led by Dick Grayson. As a result, there were now two Titans teams, the Titans led by Dick Grayson, and the Teen Titans, now led by Damian Wayne. Raven was shanghaied into the Teen Titans via kidnapping by Damian alongside her old teammate Beast Boy, the younger, African-American Wally West and Starfire. Raven did not do much of note during this period. She briefly made an ill-advised decision to throw in with an insane Tim Drake from the future alongside Beast Boy, as they determined that even a Tim Drake without all his marbles was preferable to Damian. She also did a few cool things during the Dark Nights: Metal Wild Hunt tie-in issue where she was decidedly unimpressed by the angsty darkness of evil Batmen. Monkeys were involved. DC tried putting Raven in a relationship with Wallace the Younger but changed its mind. As a result, they officially began dating in an issue of Teen Titans and were mentioned to have broken up off-panel in an issue of The Flash that came out the same day. She was then abducted by aliens and took part in the events of No Justice where she was part of a Wonder Woman-led team of mystics before having a few solo adventures stopping Trigon again and briefly leading a group of magically powered teens associated with the morally dubious Baron Winters. After this, she was ambiguously aged up alongside Beast Boy and placed on Dick Grayson’s adult Titans team where she was drawn as older and written as more mature and having a preexisting friendship as Nightwing but nothing was explicitly retconned. Raven lost her soul-self early in her tenure with this team along with most of her powers and ability to feel emotions due to trickery by an elf. She would eventually recover it and save the universe from the villainous Mother Blood alongside Beast Boy with the two friends saving each others’ lives during the final battle.

The Present:

Because in another universe Batman is a clown, Wonder Woman had a conversation with Perpetua after a bunch of nonsense that I am not going to waste time on what happened and continuity changed again. Raven is now in her mid to late twenties and has achieved greater mastery of her powers than ever before. Her background is currently hazy with something vaguely approximating the events of New Teen Titans having occurred several years in the past with some details changed. (eg: Cyborg was a member of the Justice League before joining the Teen Titans.) More information regarding Raven’s current origins and backstory will presumably be revealed in the upcoming Tales of the Titans miniseries.
Raven agreed to participate in her fellow former New Teen Titans’ disastrous attempt to run a school for super-teens. It exploded twice in a year before they gave up and called it quits. During this period, Raven mentored Billy Batson and his friend Dane (who was the antichrist), saving the two boys from the clutches of the fallen angel Neron after they made an unauthorized trip to Hell. She would also reignite her relationship with Beast Boy. After Teen Titans Academy blew up the second time during the events of Dark Crisis, Raven proved instrumental in saving the universe, locating Pariah’s magical macguffin as part of a Justice League Dark taskforce and defeating a corrupted Spectre with the assistance of Jim Corrigan. However, victory would not come without a cost, as Beast Boy would become horribly traumatized after an attack by Deathstroke which nearly killed him. Also, Lazarus Planet happened and Trigon came back but nobody cares about Lazarus Planet.
Following the events of Dark Crisis, Raven took her relationship with Beast Boy to the next level, sharing living arrangements with him, helping him cope with his PTSD, and even engaging in public displays of affection with her fuzzy green lover. Raven and Beast Boy agreed to once more serve on the Titans, now tasked with safeguarding the world following the disbanding of the Justice League. One of their first assignments was the safekeeping of Olivia Desmond, a young girl whose soul was claimed by Neron, who had since taken over hell. Raven saw echoes of her past in the young girl and took the matter very personally -much to the concern of her teammates who were disturbed by her willingness to entertain extreme measures to safeguard the child. Determining that the best way to learn how to help Olivia was to go directly to the source of the problem, Raven led the Titans through the depths of hell where Nightwing found the information needed to save Olivia’s soul. While there, she formed an uneasy working relationship with the demon Blaze, who was vying with Neron for control of hell.
Neron proved supremely incompetent and utterly failed at all of his attempts at villainy in an extraordinarily pathetic manner. Trigon showed up to call him a loser, a rare area of agreement between father and daughter. While Neron was easily poofed back to hell by Nightwing in a weakened state through the power of bad writing, Raven deemed this outcome unsatisfactory. Believing Olivia to be unsafe as long as Neron was still at large, Raven returned to hell by herself without consulting her teammates and proceeded to singlehandedly overthrow him through overwhelming violence. She then left a brutalized and comatose Neron to the mercies of Blaze, to whom she handed the leadership of hell. When asked what price she demanded for control of the underworld, Raven informed Blaze that she would call in a favor later but for now she just wanted the Titans left alone by any demonic forces. Blaze agreed to Raven’s terms, warning her that she sensed that Raven was not whole and something was missing…
Raven currently stands at an inflection point. In some ways, she has never had it better. She is more powerful than she has ever been and has reunited with her oldest friends, earned the respect of her peers, and found love. However, her decision to meddle in hell’s affairs may prove her downfall, earning her powerful enemies and encouraging dark impulses she has long tried to suppress. What happens next may determine whether she will finally rise above her tragic past or fall into damnation forever. Whatever the future may hold for the Daughter of Darkness, the return of her father and the rise of a new Brother Blood suggests that it is not going to be easy.

Recommended Readings:

Those interested in Raven’s classic adventures should check out New Teen Titans (1980) and Teen Titans (2003).
Those who want to see a crossover with Marvel written by Chris Claremont should read The Uncanny X-Men and The New Teen Titans if they can find a copy.
Those who think I am making the bit with Booster Gold up should read Booster Gold (2007), issues 23-24.
Her solo adventures during the New 52 and Rebirth eras can be found in Marv Wolfman’s Raven (2016) and Raven: Daughter of Darkness (2018).
To get caught up on where she is currently, read Nightwing (2016) 100-104, then Titans (2023) and her upcoming issue in Tales of the Titans.
She also stars in Kami Garcia’s popular YA novels Raven and Beast Boy Loves Raven, which are illustrated by fan favorite artist Gabriel Picolo.

Foundations of Humanity 29 (Healing Words) - an NoP fanfic
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Thank you u/SpacePaladin15 for establishing the Nature of Predators Universe, and for allowing Fanfics to flourish! Thank you again, u/Braquen, u/Acceptable_Egg5560, u/BiasMushroom721, and last but not least u/Liberty-Prime76 for proofreading! This is my side of the Nature of a Giant crossover!
First -- Previous -- Next
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Memory transcription subject: Valek, Venlil tourist
Date [standardized human time]: Sept 11th, 2136. Middle of 3rd Claw
Tarlim was the first to see me as I marched toward the table, tossing the still-open pad into its center.
“Predator Disease is anything! Whatever they need to put you away!” I cried, vacillating between grief and outrage while Tarlim looked through my research.
“They don't work! None of them do! Hundreds are being thrown into those facilities for everything from active murder, to jaywalking,” And Tarlim met my gaze, “to complaints. Complaints! The most positive source said ‘a dozen cured every year’. From a sample of hundreds! No names! No sources! Just their word and a ‘trust me, bro!’ And that’s only maybe from the ‘jaywalking’ section, not even the people who need real help!”
I pulled my ears down taut, embracing the pain to distract my panic, blind to Alvi’s desperate attempts to calm and comfort me. “The facilities don't help anyoneI But every one of them punishes, no, tortures Venlil for something they cannot control or choose. Not criminals, not those who did something, just… just so many people who did nothing wrong! Who had no record beyond a-a single half-shorn screening!!"
I stopped to breathe, my voice faltering as I started again, “And we sent you there. I checked, you did nothing! Not even a complaint! The only charge on your record, even according to that pro-exterminator trash ‘Moralen’s Pred Guide,’ was ‘resisting arrest’; whatever the brahk that’s supposed to mean. You were only barely an adult, and… we still sent you there. I’m… I don’t… I’m so sorry, Tarlim. I won’t plead innocence; we did this. Our people, all of us, failed you in the most impossible, embarrassing way. I’m…”
You’re what?? Sorry?!
My body went limp as I felt the weight of my people’s sins against all of us, distilled into this Person’s real experience. “No. Just a sad ‘sorry’ doesn’t even begin to make up for what happened to you. I don't know how to make this right, or if it’s even possible to do so at this point. But for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”
I looked up at him. At Tarlim. He… he had begun breathing erratically, short and fast, tossing his chest wool about. His ears twitching in fear. Had- had I said something wrong? I saw Alvi lean towards him with worry in her affect. “Hey, you okay?”
Tarlim didn’t show any sign of having heard. He grabbed onto his knees and pulled them to his chest. Jacob stood and began running his hand along Tarlim’s back. I didn’t know what to do! How do I fix this? Should I do something? Wait? I-
I heard a chime coming from Tarlim’s shoulder pack. As soon as it was heard, it was like he transformed. The look of panic and confusion was replaced by a determined calm as he began taking steady breaths. He seemed to be coming around again.
Maeve leaned forward, looking uncertain at her words. “It’s alright Tarlim. We are here with you. You’re not alone. ”
“C’mon buddy, you got this.”
A murmur, too small for a Venlil of his size, “Th-Thank you.” Then Tarlim’s ears swiveled back to me, “Valek… you… you are the first to say that. To really say that, and to mean it, too.”
My tail swayed in honest joy, while I closed my eyes to give him comfort, as he started again, choking on phlegm brought on by tears,
“It has been years since my lawsuit. In that time, I can count the people who supported me on one paw. One paw!” He held up four claws for emphasis. “They helped me get on my feet. Let me release my feelings. And just… they were there for me. They gave sympathy, but you…” I panted, trying to control my breathing. “You didn’t. You called me dangerous. Feared me. You were… you were them.” He swept his arms at the oblivious crowd below, “In all those years, all that time, nobody, not one, had ever apologized. Not sincerely.”
I tried to show kindness and welcome, happy to have another friend. “You’re a good person Tarlim. I know I won’t be the last.”
…
A short silence fell over us all, before Maeve spoke up, “Not to give conversational whiplash, but absolutely to change the subject: What do you think about Venlil Cuisine, Jacob? I am quite partial to the Juicefruit, even if I need a small towel for every bite.”
“Good subject change,” he took a drink of his soda and set it on the table. “There’s this thing that translates to Firefruit, and it’s amazing! Got this nice zest like a lime but a sweet spice like a jalapeño! Its juice goes great on a lot of things!”
“Oh then you may like this,” she shifted a plate of fried veg across the table, “This one is fried Deeproot. It’s got quite a ginger kick to it, but the fry brings out a lot of sweet too!”
Tarlim’s affect softened as we spoke on kinder things. “Deeproot? That’s rather tasty.” He uncurled himself and swung his ears genially, “Have you… have you been on the planet long?”
Maeve met my eye, and pulled Alvi onto her lap, her voice taking on a wistful remembrance, “Feels like a new life… but my calendar says just over two weeks! A lot has changed since I walked on the station.” Her voice trailed off, while my tail flicked comfort and Alvi leaned her weight against Maeve.
Tarlim continued his curiosity and asked Maeve, “So what do you think of our planet? Apart from the… poor welcoming.”
Maeve waved her hand dismissively, “Oh those poor pups were just doing as nature intended; honestly it just made your planet more familiar! Really that’s the surprising thing, despite twenty lightyears across the galaxy, everything is still so familiar! You have trees that remind me of the Redwoods, you have cities that are just like ours, if shinier, and Alvi here worked in customer service!” She ruffled Alvi’s crown affectionately. “I never imagined I would feel so at home on another world!”
I stepped back from the conversation and helped myself to what was left of the food, enjoying the sharp tang of the Deeproot.
Maeve breathed a contented sigh under her veil, before facing Jacob, “How about you, Jacob? How are you handling the planet?”
Jacob finished another drink of his soda. “Ah would say that outside of the station incident, it has been going well. After we’re done here, ah am going to be getting my own apartment to live in since Tarlim’s isn’t big enough!” He snorted in amusement. “Don’ worry about me living in an apartment. Ah have mah ways of winning people over.” He picked up the last of his fried dough. “Relatedly, be careful with Venlil drinks. Their ‘lite beer’ is our equivalent to distilled whiskey.”
Maeve laughed lightly, “Glad to see they know how to party! It’s an equal trade though, what they call an ‘energy drink’ is on par with weak tea. I was so glad my handler got me a 10lb bag of beans and a french press.”
“Lite beer? What do you guys consider strong?” Alvi asked, and I had to agree with her concerned tone.
“Tarlim called it distilled Ipsom,” Jacob responded. “60% alcohol. That’s pretty strong fer most humans. Our whiskey is usually 40-50%. What about y’all? What do you call strong?”
Alvi perked up, excited to share one of her happy memories, “I used to hang out at The Roost when I was in the capital, and they kept a bottle of 90% behind the counter for Venlil only: distilled and fermented Goji juice, aged in Nishtalian hardwood casks. It was really good, but I’ve had stronger.” I had to admire how proud she was to say that. Even I would struggle at that amount!
Jacob leaned back, his shoulders tense with surprise. “Jeezus! And this is just drinkable Ethanol, right? Not Methanol?”
I recoiled at the awful memory of my first time with Methanol. That disgusting stuff? Blech!
“Ew, no, I hate the taste it leaves on your tongue. And after what happened at my 16th, I’m not touching that stuff any time soon.” Alvi seemed to share in my distaste for that glorified spoiled speh.
“Yeah,” Tarlim chimed in between sips of his Sprunk, “I hear the Zurulians experiment with drinking that stuff specifically, but it seems to be just them. Even they don’t usually drink at our level.”
“That’s incredible!” Maeve chimed in, “That stuff makes us go blind. Doesn’t stop people from homebrewing it anyway though.”
My tail flicked in concern; I mean, methanol is bad, but were humans so frail that it would make them go blind?
Tarlim, however, seemed somehow amused! “You guys are crazy. Why would you do something that would cause you to be disabled?”
“I never said we were smart!” Maeve, to my astonishment, laughed along with Jacob. “Seriously though, it's complicated. The insultingly short version is: humans experimented with alcohol for literally our entire history, some post industrial nits thought it was evil and banned it, so people made their own. Bootlegging Moonshine became its own culture, even the not so smart parts, so methanol based drinks are still around.”
“But seriously though, to turn blind.” Tarlim’s voice was full of worry, and his tail didn’t hide it. “Why do something that would cause them to be cast out?”
“Cast out??”
A silence fell over the table, while Maeve and Jacob watched Tarlim, who began to shrink under their gazes. I hadn’t been expecting this reaction; wouldn’t humans do the same? Isn’t that what… Wait. Maeve wouldn’t, not in a million years! Why did I think that humans would do this?
“Why,” Jacob asked, “would you think we would cast someone out?”
“B-because that’s what… we… oh Speh!” Tarlim did his best to bury his face in his paws, and I hid behind my ears. “Why did I think that? It isn’t true- of course it isn’t! The exterminators said it! Gods!”
“Yeah,” Jacob said as he shook his head slowly, “that ain’t what we do. We try to help them live as normal a life as possible.”
“Yeah,” Maeve agreed. “We teach them how to use guiding sticks, give correctional implants, or help them learn braille!”
That last word caught my attention. The translator seemed to struggle with it, saying it was some form of communication for people who couldn’t see, but not how. “Braille? What’s that? The translator didn’t quite get it.”
“It’s a kind of writing.” Maeve explained, “Little bumps whose patterns translate to a letter. A blind person can pass their fingers over the bumps to feel the pattern and thus read through their hands.”
“Don’t y’all have something similar?” Jacob directed his question at Tarlim, “you told me once that the Xeno-what’s it hospital.” He twirled his hand dismissively, “You said it had classes. Don’t they teach stuff like that there?”
“Those…” Tarlim spoke up, then hesitated. “Those classes are for families. Teaching them how to care for their herd members. Not for… us.”
Jacob shook his head. “Okay? Ah mean, that’s fine fer families, but what about someone without one? Or if they go somewhere the rest of their herd doesn’t?”
"It depends on the family," Alvi added her voice, "some will go without to stay with the weak, but some will just…" Her ears fell, "leave them. And for those that don't have… don't have a herd they…"
A deep sadness drifted from the Giant, “Sleep on the streets.”
“Bullshit!” Jacob slammed his hand against his table. “I’m not gonna lie and say we humans don’t have homeless, but no support if they don’t have a family or herd? None? What about shelters? Food banks? Those… those bunkers everybody evacuated to in panic!”
“We have food banks!” I piped up, wishing to add some hope to the gloom, “We don’t let people just starve! If people are tight on money, they are completely free to visit one of the social centers or food banks! They have services there to match you with a herd, and sometimes they give community service. It's considered pre-disease treatment.” But I couldn’t ignore the Tarlim in the room. "Sometimes people fall through the cracks. And sometimes, as I just learned… they are dropped through."
"Oh my god…" Maeve sighed, her face pointed at nothing.
“Hold it. Pre-disease?” Jacob’s voice dripped with skepticism. “So you're saying that someone visiting one of those places would be saying they have your Predator Disease?”
I answered immediately, "Not necessarily. It is more supposed to prevent herdless behavior. I've never been in the system, though, so I don't know what it looks like inside."
“It’s a big room.” I wince at Tarlim’s tone as he interrupts. “A bunch of bunk beds crammed together in the center with Exterminators watching over at all hours as you eat, sleep, and… everything else. Watching for the slightest excuse to cry Predator Disease.” He let out a huff of distaste. “When I was in the facility, there were five inmates who tried to stick around me despite what the faculty said.” He stared directly at me as he said the final words. “Three of them were snatched in one of those places. There’s a reason I slept in the streets.”
“But… but they wouldn’t…”
I remember the photo. I remember the corruption on Emerald Marble. I remember the testimony from Clegal Falls. So many children, abandoned by their families.
"Who am I kidding. I want so badly to believe we aren't like that, but…" I pointed despondently at my pad in the center of the table.
"It's ok, Valek, this is actually familiar to us." Maeve's voice soothed my melancholy, as she tried to rub my head with her elbow, "We haven't solved those problems ourselves, but we have made huge strides. Hopefully, more opportunities and less facilities may give them a fighting chance."
“Here’s hoping,” Jacob agreed.
I heard Tarlim sigh, but his tail… wagged?. “And as little as it may be, there is now at least one city with no Facility at all.”
A city with no facility. Somewhere that people with… possible Predator Disease roamed free. For two years. And yet, this place… it wasn’t bad. It wasn’t in chaos. There weren’t people being devoured in the streets at all times. There was… there was nothing. Just a normal city…
How could so few have realized…
“By the way,” my train of thought was interrupted by Jacob’s voice, “bit of a subject change, but Maeve. Are you going to eat any of your food?” He gestured to our plate. “You haven’t even touched that since we arrived.”
Maeve flipped her hand, and her voice was light and kind, "It's quite a pain to eat through this. I'd already had enough before you guys got here, I'll be fine."
Jacob shook his head. “Ah don’t buy that. There’s only one plate in front of you, and it’s only been nibbled.” He leaned forward, placing his elbow on the table. “It’s the teeth thing, isn’t it?”
Tarlim signaled concern, while his ears locked onto Maeve. “Are you not eating just so I don’t see your teeth?”
Maeve was quiet for a moment. She was thinking about her next words, like I had seen so many times before. "... I'm sorry I lied to you, I should have seen you're more comfortable than the average Venlil. Teeth is a part of it, yes, but I have had the most intense reaction from my eyes and hair. I'm red-headed, rather brightly I'll add."
Jacob leaned back in his chair, and chuckled, "Oh, No!"
Tarlim’s affected slid to confusion, "I don't get it, what am I missing?"
"Uhh, there's no easy way to say this bud, but her hair makes it look like she's doused and speckled in Venlil blood."
Of course, there really isn’t a good way to say that. It was the most alarming thing about Maeve when we first met, and Alvi took almost three paws to get used to it! I hoped that Tarlim wouldn’t freak out too badly.
He stared blankly. “Ooookaaay? And why is that a problem?”
Whut.
“Wait,” Alvi was the first to speak, “you aren’t bothered?”
Tarlim cocked his head quizzically, “Why should I be? It’s a fur color. I have seen pictures of Sulians with a pigment that makes them look like the color of our blood.” I could only stare in shock as he simply sipped from his soda. “Don’t starve yourself on my account.”
Ok Tiny, you're laying it on a little thick. You don’t have to be that nonchalant.
My ears focused on him as I called him out, “Alright, how are you so calm about this? Even the braver Venlil on the station were nervous around humans that weren’t their partners. Why aren’t you?”
“Guys, look at me. I tower over all of you. What could they do to me that a prey couldn’t? That…” His whistling laugh dripped with irony, “that a prey hasn’t already done?”
What they… that hasn’t… that has to be the most cynical reason for bravery I’ve heard.
I remembered the video of the station incident. My father’s rifle, ready to fire. The shuttle driver dropping us in the middle of a forest. And through it all, Maeve’s smile never left me.
I joined the four of them in boisterous laughter at the ridiculous reversal of everything I have ever known and been taught. When the world is upside down, what can you do but laugh?
Shortly after, Maeve regained her breath and answered, "I'm glad you can laugh about it! Well, consent given…" and she removed her veil entirely.
I watched as Maeve removed her head covering, marveling at the luscious waves of sunset falling against her shoulder. I couldn’t stop my tail from swaying as I saw her bright smile light up the entire room, and set my heart ablaze; a fire more hungry than any Exterminators’ torch. And in that moment I wanted nothing more than to feel her hair in my paws, scent her salt on my tongue, and hear our jubilations rattle off the walls of wherever we stood. To know her, completely. And maybe ‘biblically’.
Tarlim spoke with certainty, as if stating a fact that was beyond obvious, “You have very nice eyes,” Damn right, she does. And my snout bloomed at the well deserved compliment. “The color reminds me of a freshly sprouted Darkwood leaf.” Tarlim turned his attention to me, “From what I understand, you two are very brave to have seen her without her mask.”
I flapped my ears to shake off my reverie, and I breathed deeply as I remembered how we began. "It took time. We had talked by text for a couple weeks before the meetup, and our introduction in the room went smoothly. But when she took off her hair wrap, I… I could hear the sound of blood on the ground. I tried to dive under the bunk, but I missed. Woke up in the clinic with a nasty bump." and I laid my paw on the place of impact, now well healed.
Jacob chuckled. “You certainly weren't the only one to react by freaking out.” He turned his visor towards Alvi. “What about you?”
"My first time was in the forest." Alvi started, "Maeve was… having a hard time. I caught her eyes when I was trying to talk to her and… I uhh… I fainted!" She pulled her ears in front of her face, "and the second time! We were in Valek's b-" her voice caught in her throat.
I met Alvi’s eye while she sat on Maeve’s lap, reaching out to offer comfort as I picked up her story, "It's ok, Alvi. Our first rest at the farm we were all sharing a bed, Maeve's spare room wasn't finished yet. Maeve's uncovered face was the first thing Alvi saw when she woke, and she locked up. At least we took the opportunity to get used to eye contact."
"How about you two?" Maeve spoke to Tarlim directly, "You mentioned you were from the first wave on Prime Station? I'm glad you both made it out of the attack!"
“Nah,” Jacob waved his hand, palm facing out, “Only one of us was on the station.”
Tarlim sighed in disappointment, “Yeah, I’m certain you can guess why it wasn’t me.”
Maeve sympathetically returned his disappointment, “Ah. I can see why your size would be a prohibitor. Though I’m certain a human would have gotten creative to make a fix. But no use lamenting what is already done. And you, Jacob?” She switched to facing Jacob, and asked through a bite of fried sweetwood. “How did you fare in the attack?”
Jacob shrugged, “ah volunteered to help recover drifters after the raid cause, well, Spacesuit.” he gestured at his sadly un-blue pelts, “But Ah’m sure we can talk about that even more in a bit. Fer now,” he shook the now empty fried dough bags, “Ah don’t think these were filling enough. Do any of y’all have suggestions on what else to eat?”
“Not around here if you’re looking for ‘filling’,” Maeve answered, “If I’m being honest, as delicious as I find their food, everything has been very calorie-light. I would ki-- uh… be very excited for some pasta. This girl needs her carbs!” Her giggle was adorable. I could tell she was about to say something else, but she recovered well.
“Well why not eat some Stringfruit?” Tarlim offered, excited to be helpful, “It’s one of the more dense foods, more content and less juice, and has a good amount of protein inside. Good savory taste, in my opinion. Or maybe some more Bunt leaf salad. Hearty plant. Bit neutral, but that makes it good with just about everything. And even though it’s not my taste, firefruit is a good option for calories.”
I was impressed; He was more familiar with some of our foods than even my parents! Maeve and Jacob looked at him in surprise before he clarified, “I’m big! Need to eat more to fuel my size!”
Maeve lit up in another smile, “I will take those notes! The three of us can check a cafe that we passed on the way. But Jacob, what were your first impressions when you got to Venlil habitations? The smell took some getting used to, but at least it’s not sour…” Her question surfaced memories of her teeth on my neck, and I hoped my bloom wasn’t noticeable.
Tarlim’s ears turned in confusion, “Smell? What scent do you mean?”
Maeve shrugged, “It’s just something I noticed while on the station. Humans have their own scents, some stronger than others, but I noticed that the Venlil are especially thick; might be a consequence of having to taste the air. You, for example, remind me of when I took a nap in a field of honeysuckle.”
In response to Maeve’s words, Tarlim leaned forward for a scenting breath.
It was an interesting part of our biology. While our lack of a physical nose caused many to assume that we Venlil had no sense of smell, that wasn’t quite true. Our mouth and tongue had more taste receptors than most other races, so we could taste the air much like other races could smell it; though we were less sensitive and more specialized. We would be able to discern the difference between fruits one day apart in age, but things like petroleum products were completely scentless to us. Maeve and I had a wonderful conversation about the differences in our biology when that was first brought up.
Tarlim appeared to approve of our choice of shampoo. “Interesting. If multiple people were using the same scented fur-care, I can see how it would be overwhelming at first. But Jacob is going to get his own apartment. We’re just waiting to hear from the magistratta with news. Should be on this paw or the next. I’m sure that sleeping on a couch wouldn’t be an accurate impression.”
“Certainly not,” Jacob agreed. “Just thankful the apartment is tall enough!”
“Yeah, I can stand straight with my ears flat. Barely fitting for me, but good headroom for humans!” Tarlim flattened his ears, mimicking his issues with low ceilings, before laughing amiably.
“But fer now,” Jacob calmly stood from the table, “my stomach demands to be satisfied. Perhaps we could all check out that cafe y’all noticed?”
Alvi’s ears excitedly perked, “That would be fantastic! They had a stringfruit soup bowl with spiceleaf and nightberry on the window that I’d love to try! They're just leeward of the Dome, about two streets over.” Maeve set her down before standing as well.
Tarlim was next to rise, agreeing and swinging their tail in clear joy and friendliness. Maeve and Jacob reapplied their coverings before we all walked as a herd to the exit.
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