Good day!
(I started this ramble as a feedback e-mail, but before finishing it found this sub-reddit where I heard the devs are active? Current game version as of writing: 1.5.4.)
A big thank you to everyone involved in developing and delivering Pickle Pete! It is easily in my top 10 most fun mobile games and I very nearly consider it a masterpiece of the genre. I've put in dozens of hours of playtime at the least.
I'll lead with critical bullet points, follow them up with elaboration and my experience, then end with praise bullet points for those that care to read it.
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Opportunities for Improvement:

1. There is no in-game method to replay the intro sequence.
2. Each playable character should have their own, even if very short, intro animation.
3. Intro animations / bestiary for enemies.
4. Add more bang for more bucks.
5. Honor those that spent gems on chests before additional rewards for cumulative openings was added.
6. No in game text tips.
7. Narrow preferable choices for mutations and equip-able active skill.
8. Weapon attachments
9. Farming the last available boss could be more rewarding.
10. "Blessings" is an awesome system, but isn't congruent with the game thematically.
11. Long animation delay on skill selection cards. Not an issue for new players.
12. Add weapon trade-in vendor.
13. Possible bug: when swapping apps and returning to Pickle Pete while playing Endless game play will continue, but pickles will refrain from dropping making points no longer acquirable until the run is terminated. Possibly intentional to reduce cheating.

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I've been playing Pickle Pete over the last few weeks and it's clearly a step above most mobile games on the market now. I had completed all main campaign levels and additional game modes just before the level twelve update. This was of course followed closely by multiple other updates which kept resetting my endless rank. ::MadNotMad:: After 3 committed attempts I've broken into the top one-hundred twice and top ten once. I did all of this without purchasing anything...yet, nearly acquiring all of the bonus blessing stats, and working up to a purple SMG for a starter weapon. I still have no legendary gear...yet.
I've loved video games since my grandparents let me load up games I can't completely recall on their MS-DOS computer. I don't always have as much time as I'd like to game, but I have been mashing buttons for nearly three decades. I believe there is some overlap between what makes a game fun and what makes a game well designed. What people find fun will vary, but I see good design as a more objective truth. Even though I'm no professional it's clear to me that Pickle Pete had/has at least a rock star or two infusing good design principles.
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1. First things first. The intro animation may have been added after I started playing for a bit. I can't recollect. In any event I skipped some of it. Sure I can and have viewed it on youtube, but it's still taking up space on my phone right? Can we get an in-game button to replay it?
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2. Speaking of intro animations.. each character should get one! Even if just a short one that plays when acquiring one. (And maybe also a replay button.) It could highlight or hint at the different bonuses that apply at the end of their roll moves.
**Mr. Peely** \- Running, slips into a back flip, beginning of slip flip face is surprised/worried, midway through flip face is determined/smug, animation becomes a blur, lands while doing a split and swinging upward with an axe cleaving an enemy in two.
**Corny McCob** \- A yellow cylinder is rapidly spinning on two squares of butter, butter drops are being flung away at various directions, the cylinder launches away, three point hero landing, camera panning up from feet reveals a maniacal cob of corn holding a pipe bomb, glancing left and right, I don't like that look in his eyes or that blinking red light.
**Willy the Wiener** \- Is that a rapidly disassembled picnic table riddled with bullet holes flying through the air? Camera pans down to a beach front while cinders and charcoal pieces are jettisoned from a barbecue grill. Willy is tanning hides with a quickness holding dual uzis. Arms and uzis are a blur until they snap into clarity between each volley.
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3. It's only fair that the enemies of the game get a little love. They're getting slaughtered out there! Something has to raise morale. Why not a little intro sequence highlighting their attack? And/or a bestiary somewhere in the menus. Descriptions with similar tone to what is found in the game Plants vs. Zombies would be fitting.
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4. I find the current monetization models most prevalent, specifically in the mobile market, shameful. If I could go back in time and kill baby Hitler - I wouldn't. I'd smoke the mofo that thought it was a good idea to make Candy Crush monstrously profitable. Just kidding. Ninety-Nine dollars is a big chunk towards the latest gen console or a kick ass graphics card. Or... a pile of in game currency that shaves off some time and possibly puts you ahead of fellow gamers... I know it's just the way of things currently, but the cliche gem crates for various prices including one for ninety-nine dollars is personally a huge annoyance. It is one of the first things I look for in a game and determines along with the obvious passion that was put into the games creation that determines whether I will spend any money within it.
Money is part of what makes life unfun for many, and now more than ever it's detracting from a core reason gaming is fun. In my opinion games should be as level as a playing field as they can be outside of 'real life'. Paying to win robs fledgling gamers of skill ceiling, feelings of accomplishment, and the bragging rights that come with leveling up without swiping a credit card.
So dump the uninspired gem boxes for money or at least throw in some extra cosmetics, alternate soundtracks, or the option for players to add their own content. Something to move the needle in the other direction and show appreciation to those who help fund access and development for those that can't. The move would ideally garner more appreciation and wind up netting more money anyway. Or I might need to see an optimismoptomitrist about adjusting the shade of my glasses.
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5. I haven't yet, but I will be spending some money on this game. It's too good not to. I'd like to at least craft a legendary starter weapon beforehand though. Just so I can say I did. It makes me wince a little inside knowing that if I had saved my marshmallows I would have spent enough gems on large chests by now to acquire a guaranteed legendary item. I opened three before the update was released that added the cumulative reward. Any chance a catch-up / credit can be implemented for all in the same boat?
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6. I must have missed the message that explains the way the uncollected pickles and the pickle jar interacts. It took me longer than I'd like to admit to figure out what the jar was all about. Could we get this and other such game tips added? Maybe incoming update teaser message as well. They could be auto-cycling fade in/out text messages in the empty space underneath the boss picture on the stage selection screen.
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7. I've read some google reviews of the game suggesting that melee weapons need adjusting. I think they're just fine. They receive strong bonuses from the viking four-set. They're best used to supplement range damage as the timing of damage between melee and low fire rate range is staggered. If you want to up the difficulty of the game, try going for full melee builds. It's like a hidden difficulty slider. An active skill equip could be added to enable the player to throw their melee weapons for a duration, turning such builds into a challenging wave clearer, but a monstrous boss killer. If nothing else throw in some Lightsab...I mean... Laser Swords.
What I find simultaneously the most easily fixed and largest flaw of the game is the narrow preferable choice in mutations and equip-able active skills. Similar to my perspective concerning melee weapons this system could be viewed as a difficulty slider. I think it would instead be more fun to modify them to make them more compelling. The damage bonus to enemies on fire would be more viable if the active skill that set the enemies on screen on fire was on a shorter cooldown. Now that I'm thinking about it though this combo may be just fine if you want to build up larger health enemies first or do more damage to bosses. The cooldown and fire duration still seem kind of dissatisfying. Maybe add hidden bonuses that increase the draw rate of things like the fire mace while either or both are equipped.
The knock back skill is more underwhelming than the fire. The most viable use I can think of for this one is securing supply crates. The cd could be shortened on the skill or turn the skill into a time warping bubble that begins with a knock back. While the bubble is active increase player attack speed and damage taken, but any enemies or projectiles entering the bubble will have drastically reduced movement speed.
Maybe more diverse enemies could then be added so that occasionally what once was an optional item is near mandatory for a time. Urging players to try out new builds for success while making more items feel like they've earned their place in the game.
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8. One last item modification idea. Weapon attachments! Scopes, Stocks, Barrels, Carbon Fiber Axe Handles, stuff like that to modify 'Own' weapon stats. Maybe you have to collect pieces for them from specific bosses. Late game players would have a reason to return to earlier levels and in turn see the progress they've made as they rack up way more pickles than their first time through. This would also give a bit of a push/pull mechanic to the energy system. The energy system I suspect is just there to prevent supply crate farming abuse. I've rarely run out of energy while still wanting to play which I like. All attachments could be lost upon upgrading or resetting the weapon to keep the hamster wheel spinning, make the efforts toward building them more meaningful, and delay the realization of weapons full capabilities.
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9. The above change would make farming the last available boss more rewarding as well. The latest boss being the most difficult to kill and dropping the latest released weapons attachments would give successive runs more meaning.
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10. Another change that I feel should be done quickly is 86ing the blessing system. Not entirely. It is a win-win addition that makes watching nearly pointless ads more satisfying. But it just doesn't mesh with the Pickle Pete theme. Idea: 'Condiments' may not make sense for all of the characters, but thinking 'Hot Sauce' for the +25% damage boost. Visual effects for each can be added to the character to cement the system in the player's mind. "Aww crap my character isn't throwing off glitter sparks. I forgot to grab the the gold gain bonus."
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11. This change suggestion is more for experienced players that have earned their stripes. When doing long endless runs especially the animation delay after picking skill cards is slightly annoying. It's not major, but I wanna go fast! Make this delay toggleable after the player has cleared all the extra game mode levels or killed the final available boss or meeting both requirements. Let's gooooo!
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12. A change that would be good for players of all experience levels would be a weapon trader. Maybe you can set up a trade-in shop preference before level select. Should you find the merc vendor in a level you can trade one of your currently equipped weapons for an equal grade preferred weapon. Even if at an additional cost...gotta make pickles somehow.
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13. Possible bug: when swapping apps and returning to Pickle Pete while playing Endless game play will continue, but pickles will refrain from dropping making points no longer acquirable until the run is terminated. Possibly intentional to reduce cheating.
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Things that make you go 'Awesome!':

• Pickle Pete! is not another copy and paste code cash grab. ...I'm imagining a darty eyed programmer hesitantly grinning 'right' while slowly nodding. :D
• Viability of numerous gear and skill selections.
• Excellent sound design. I especially love the long battle track that only reveals itself as you progress to long lasting waves.
• Animations and weapon targeting is on point.
• UI and loading screen design.
• Creative additional game modes.
• Competitive Endless!?! This is a massive boon to replay-ability, keeps the game off the 'eh I may as well uninstall' list, and takes me back to playing Diablo 2. Yeah you beat the game, but how many people have you beaten that have beat the game? I love it. The only improvement I would consider for endless is implementation of a wave skip feature. You'll get more points faster, but only be able to skip as far as progress you've earned minus X amount. Skip too much and you might not be able to crush the wave with your relatively diminished gear. Maybe wave skip is only available once a day too.
• I'm Pickle Pete!

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Tldr: people suck, college doesnt like people who dont conform to their cookie cutter plan, and I cant seem to get ahead of constantly changing degree requirements.
So I, 25M, have been trying to finish my bachelor’s degree in mechanical and electrical engineering. It is a dual bachelors program that codenses 2, 4 year degrees into a single 4 year period.
I did 2 years full time. One year on campus, the other off.
My first year was already off to a rockey start, as the college wanted to put me in remedial math and english classes despite my 32 ACT score. I couldnt afford the english exam, or any of my AP test fees as my family made more than the allowable limit even though they refused to pay for it.
I argued with admissions and had to take a placement test to be placed into calculus 1, even though I had already taken AP cal in Highschool. They refused to change my English asignment so I was stuck in remedial English.
Towrds the end of my first year, my GPA went from 3.5 to 2.8 because I contracted mono and was down for 3 months while on campus. My family didnt want to drive and get me during holidays including summer, so I ended up having to stay on campus alone for the better part of a whole year. I had to pay a bunch of fees etc to stay on campus.
After setting up time with my advisoteacher to make up for workI missed while sick, he flat out told me that I would never be a engineer because "I dont think like his kids who are engineers".
I elected to work through the summer as a RND intern at a stove manufacturing company to get a car. My dad was charging me 200 a week to live with him while I worked and required me to pay for my own food and work on his farm. I worked 48 hours a week and tilled and plowed 5 acers of land, including bushwacking a small forest to make room for a horse pasture. He held onto my money to keep it safe till I had enough for a car. Only giving me enough for food.
By the time I had enough for the car, I found out he spent it all.
I kept working as a intern at the facility, changing my direct deposit to my own account. After being there for 2 months, I was fired, because the department had exceeded its budget for interns and I was the last one hired.
I got my money back from my father. I bought and fixed up a beater, and got my own place. My second year, I kept my apartment and switched from on campus to off.
I was met with excessive hostility from my college. They told me that I was required to still have the food plan and pay for a deposit on a dorm incase my apartment fell out. I wanted to live in a apartment off campus to save money. I did the math out and I was spending 30$ a meal for the meal plan the college offered, and was dropping 2k a month for housing. The meals offered included 5 day old recycled brisket pizza and still forzen broccoli.
I moved my girlfriend of the time into my apartment, and was working part time at a manufacturing facility down the road while going to school. The moment the dean of my college found out I was working there, he called the facility and requested them to let me go because he was concerned for my academic performance. I had a 2.9 GPA with a 21 credit corse load while working part time. The company was sponsoring some of the colleges equipment, and had intern programs for the manufacturing and engineering degree students. I was let go from the job, being told that they want me to come back once it was summer.
After I was let go my girlfriend at the time had a emotional break down and was sending me pictures of self harm, nooses etc. She quit her job and I had to take a full time night job at a restaurant to keep my apartment.
I was only taking 21 credits to try and expedite my degree, as my family was not paying for my college. My mother said she would cosign only for 2 years, but if I missed a payment she would sue me. I did everything I could to finish the bulk of my classes in that year.
Managing taking care of a apartment, two full grown adults, doing 21 credits at college and a full time job became too much. I finished my semester with a 2.0 gpa and reduced my course load to 13 credits. The moment I dropped below 16 credits, my student loans dropped from deferment and I was required to pay 800 a month to cover them. I called to see if they would go back into deferment if I went above 16 credits and they told me they wouldn't and if I couldn't pay I shouldn't have taken the loan.
My last semester of my second year, I had to take on another job and I finished the year at a 1.8 gpa.
Since then I have worked at a as a line cook and baker. I then got a job as a draftsmen and field analyst at a cleanroom certification and OEM equipment manufacturing company. After my first month there, they fired the lead engineer and I took on his role, without title or pay. I was running multuple multi million dollars projects. Part of my employment conditions was that the company would pay for me to finish my degree but when the time came, they didnt want too.
During covid my position was downgraded to contract only, so I left and got a job at one of my vendors companies. I was the youngest person ever to have this upper level management job at this company. The company was over 50 years old, and I got the highest position possible besides being the owner. I was doing aerospace engineering, project management and the company promised to pay for me to finish my degree. I had companies like Lockheed Martin and General Dynamics praising my work.
At this point I was taking 1 to 2 classes a semester and was almost done getting my associates degree. I changed my major to get the associates degree so I could transfer my credits to a different college. I was told by my academic advisor that none of my classes would be transfered to a different college unless I finished my degree.
The company I was working for never followed through with their promises, and I was stuck working 50+ hours a week managing 300 jobs at once. I had to be infaulable and a expert on every part and I was good at it. I formed a really positive mentopupil relationship with one of my coworkers, but any time I would make a slight spelling mistake or error on one of the thousands of pages of paper I was generating daily, he change and scream/berate me.
I ended up leaving my girlfriend from my college years, as the relationship never improved and I felt like I was a parent. I ended up reconnecting with someone who had always been by my side during college, but my girlfriend at the time made me choose between her or this friend, as she made her uncomfortable.
I only cut contact because I did have feelings for this friend, and I felt it was my duty to put my gf first. Once we re-connected I confessed my feelings to my friend, and she told me that she had the same feelings but wasnt going to be a homewrecker. We have been dating since and it has been wonderful.
She had a relative die, and I took time off from work to go with her to the funeral. On my way to the funeral, my co-worker found a large mistake that he thought was my doing. He called me up and berated me for it, and when I hanged up on him he texted me paragraphs. Turns out the mistake was his not mine.
That job never did pay for my classes, and I was fed up with the stess. I took a job at a corporation that offered me a lot of money and was going to pay for my degree. I gave 4 weeks notice, even though they required 6 months, and I got told I was a horrible human being and the worst kind of man by this coworker.
I have been working as a automation and controls technician for the past year now. I have gained a multitude of certificates on PLC, wireing and controls and have been enjoying the 120k salary. I finished my last semester with a 3.5 gpa, and am trying to finish the last two classes required for my degree.
Except my college just did a merger and now my degree requirements have changed. My new advisor has just informed me that the college would not recognize one of my english classes, and I now am required to take pre-algerbra 1 and 2 to get my degree ontop of the two classes I have yet to take. I have already taken calculus 1 and 2.
They told me they would wave the capstone project requirement for my degree if I can show them one of the not for your eyes military gun systems I worked on.
I just wanted to get a degree that would reduce the cost of a aerospace engineering degree. I am paying for college myself, and the only support I have is from my best friend and my girlfriend. This college feels like a waste of time and money, especially since every engineer I have worked with I have had to fix major flaws in their designs or implementations. I just want to make rocket engines. I have been developing one as a hobby since I was 12 but no one is going to even look at me if I dont have a degree.

Follow-up to my last post:
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An Attenborough documentary on dinosaurs with the same CGI that made The Jungle Book so lifelike? I couldn't think of a greater sell. But was it worth it? Would it give me the same sense of wonder that I felt when Walking with Dinosaurs came out 22 years earlier?
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The first episode, "Coasts", is overall the strongest episode of season 1. Starting immediately with a swimming t-rex (Tyrannosaurus rex) leading his children to an island where he smelled a dead archelon (species unknown, as no Maastrichtian-age archelon was ever found in the fossil record), that first scene showed the promise of the show as a whole. Seeing CG baby t-rexes interacting with live-action baby turtles is both concerning (as sea turtles are currently endangered) and entertaining, as they are demonstrated pretty goofily. But after that, we are done with dinosaurs for the rest of the episode.
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We cut to the one scene that, while endearing with a riveting soundtrack by power couple Anže Rozman and Kara Talve, does give me pause. The pterosaurs featured in that episode were based on bones so fragmentary that they couldn't be diagnosed. How can we be sure that Barbaridactylus was a member of the antlerwing family, Phosphatodraco a member of the simurgh family, or even Tethydraco a member of the pteranodon family? How do we even know what Alcione even looked like? Also, the score doesn't really match the slower, less urgent movements of the pterosaurs.
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The next scene was described as "the sunken continent of Zealandia", which is a refresher to see the lost continent bearing recognition for a change. Here, a family of plesiosaurs (Tuarangisaurus keyesi) comes to the coast to gulp themselves on anti-buoyant rocks, while the males ceremoniously poke their long, heavy necks up to the surface, the only good moment in an otherwise generic sequence.
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After a quick focus on coral, we get treated to a Hoffmann's mosasaur (Mosasaurus hoffmanni) relying on fish and shrimp to give him a good, proper scratch, only to be pushed out of turn by a younger male. This sequence sticks out to me because it shows mosasaurs being portrayed as animals, not as monsters to shadow Nigel Marven or kaijuified Blackfish bootlegs.
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The next scene shows a dazzling, mesmerizing mating ceremony of ammonites ("scaphitids", they were called, but that doesn't determine specific species, as it was a very huge family). They glow in the dark and mate very particularly. If the male's flashes don't sync with those of the female, he'd be rejected. Complimenting this alien but still soothing scene is Rozman and Talve's equally alien and soothing score.
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Back in Zealandia, we end with plesiosaur pod mentality, as the whole group defends a pregnant mother from a kaika taniwha (Kaikaifilu hervei). As with the previous plesiosaur scene, it wasn't a scene that I got too crazy about.
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The next episode, "Deserts", isn't really as impactful as the Planet Earth episode of the same name, both in regards to execution and the musical score, and it was riddled with confusing scene decisions. The first scene demonstrates a lek of dreadnoughts (Dreadnoughtus schrani) acting like a combination of elephant seals and frigatebirds, right down to the pops on their necks. The score in that sequence is definitely memorable, as it (literally) highlights the weights that the males take to demonstrate their fitness to attract the gaggle of girls in the audience. Though I'm left wondering--did the upstart beat the veteran because he was stronger, or because he popped one of the veteran's neck balloons, as male frigatebirds would do to ditch the competish?
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Once the sauropod show is over, we now move to what was presumed to be Nemegtia, but it was portrayed to be as dry as Djadochta, which leads to the next problem. While there was evidence of Maastrichtian-age velos in Central Asia, calling them "Velociraptor" is just wrong. I grew up watching Walking with Dinosaurs, which means I watched "Giant of the Skies", which featured Utahraptor in the wrong place at the wrong time. And while the American cut justifies this with a demonstration of a land bridge that connected North America to Europe, I don't know how much water that holds, and that doesn't seem to be relevant anyway, for the damage has already been done. So having in Velociraptor, a genus of velos that went extinct 71 million years ago, in Nemegtia, which was set 66 million years ago, is just a rehash of that previous mistake. In short, Prehistoric Planet has Utahraptor'd the Velociraptor. And besides, hasn't the picture of pack-hunting raptors already been discarded?
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The next scene, the one with the Nemegtian mononych (Mononykus olecranus), is cute but not top-notch memorable, and its color choice is teetering way close to the point of plagiarism.
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Afterwards, the brief but violent rains have created a watering hole in the middle of the desert, luring in dinosaurs and pterosaurs from miles around, including a wandering khan (Tarbosaurus bataar). The reason that scene is so low was that it was just a near-identical rotoscope of the Water Truce sequence from The Jungle Book, right down to the herbivores making a clearing for the khan.
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Then we go high up to see more Barbaridactylus. This scene I wasn't aware was a problem until Unnatural History Channel brought it up in his video, but the females were shown to be oddly consensual towards the similar-looking sneaky males, who use their feminine appearances to sneak past the larger, more impressive males. This is a problem, apparently, because the more extreme the sexual dimorphism, the more likely the sneaky male will be rejected and therefore resort to assaulting the females.
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The last scene is an interesting one, albeit one that suffered an unmemorable score in the soundtrack. Apparently, salty southern duckbills (Secernosaurus koerneri) can thrive on dunes of gypsum, but when rains hit the coast, they rely on both their tenacity and their know-how of the sky to get to more productive grazing. This scene stands out to me because I question why any large animal would choose to thrive on such a taxing environment. It'd make sense for an animal as small as the cryptile, the scrofa and the gryken from The Future is Wild, but not for a duckbill bigger than 16 feet long.
​
​
It is unanimously agreed upon that "Freshwater" is the weakest episode in the first season. Apart from the humpbacked false duckbill (Deinocheirus mirificus) getting a scratch in the swamps of a more accurate Nemegtia and the devil frog (Beelzebufo ampinga) making a snack out of a baby whacktooth (Masiaksaurus knoplferi), the habitat itself has been relegated to the backseat, which is why the mating scene of the t-rex and the laying magnificent simurgh (Quetzalcoatlus northropi) are on the C tier, good scenes that have been damaged by simply being in the wrong episode. Speaking of the latter, memes have popped up in which the faces of dinosaurs have been pasted over two shots of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, with either Masiakasaurus or the Planet Dinosaur model of Majungasaurus being Galahad and the Quetzalcoatlus being the French taunter ("What are you doing in Africa?" "MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!") when, really, that meme is more applicable to Velociraptor being in the Maastrichtian. On that topic, not only is it STILL in the wrong time, there is another problem, one I didn't pay attention to until Unnatural History Channel brought it up on his video. Instead of showing audiences raptor prey restraint (or "RPR"), the storytellers relied instead on mountain cats to show the velos hunting the pterosaurs (species unknown). Like the Deserts episode, Planet Earth has a far stronger "Freshwater" episode.
​
​
"Ice Worlds" didn't excite me as much as "Spirits of the Ice Forest" did, which is a shame, because dinosaurs in the snow is a refresher by default. We start at Prince Creek, which I couldn't ask for a worse place to start because the cast list is very fragmentary. In the opening scene, a pack of raptors (species unknown, though modeled after the pitbull raptor), shadows a herd of ugrunaaluk (Edmontosaurus sp.) for a long-delayed meal. Again, the picture of raptors hunting in packs has been debunked for a very long time now. Why insist on resorting to old cliches?
​
The Ornithomimus scene (can't think of a vernacular for them), while the designs look cool and add distinction to overall character, is still just a rotoscope of the Adelie penguin sequence from "Frozen Planet". Next.
​
The sequence with the swanneck (Olorotitan arharensis) is even less impressive. Are horsetails really more nutritious than grass? If so, then why have grasslands been the dominant plains since the Miocene?
​
The reason the scene with the tro-o is relatively low on the tier list is that it should have been longer, because a dinosaur with the intellect of a fire hawk is a very interesting prospect. But the final scene was just too short and too bland to show off any real gold.
​
We have spent so much time in the north that I question the necessity of a quick detour to Antarctica, rendering the scene with the polar macahutiul (Antarctopelta oliveroi) my least favorite of the series.
​
The final scene demonstrates the predator-prey dynamic between the northern boss (Pachyrhinosaurus perotorum) and the nanook (Nanuqsaurus hoglundi). The scene is great, the score has some very rhythmic moments, but what puts it low on the B tier are the nanooks themselves. From a distance, they look as good as most of the others. But in closeup, they look kind of fake, especially when they're running. Which brings up to the next problem--the story is based on fossil footprints of different lines pointing in the same direction. But how do we know that those parallel tracks were made at the same time and not separated within hours, days or even weeks of each other? And while it is true that nanooks were smaller than t-rexes, their portrayals in the show were just too small. More recent consensus shows that one nanook could easily match a boss in size, if not overtop it.
​
​
"Forests" is an everywhere kind of episode. The opening scene with the austroposeidon (Austroposeidon magnificus) is not long enough to get me invested.
​
Then a herd of trikes (Triceratops, species unknown) visits a cave to visit a clay lick to neutralize the poisons from their plant food. But why clay? Why not salt? Herbivores can clearly deal with poisonous plants without problem, but plants lack sodium, which is why the elephants of Mount Elgon (the inspiration behind that scene) scrape the caves not for clay, but for salt.
​
This next scene has gotten everyone talking. A male minotaur (Carnotaurus sastrei) clears the stage to wave his arms around to impress an impossibly stoic female. Everything about that scene--from the choreography to the score--is very goofy, and that is what makes it work so well.
​
While it is nice to finally see the Pinocchio-rex (Qianzhousaurus sinensis) in the flesh, its hunt for bright blue corythoraptors (Corythoraptor jacobsi) is not a scene I'd be in a hurry to revisit.
​
The fire scene is oddly slow, the only memorable moment in the whole sequence being my first official introduction to Atrociraptor marshalli...literally just one short week before Jurassic World: Dominion predictably ruined it.
​
The scene with the baby Therizinosaurus is passable. While it is cute to imagine babies having a taste for honey, it just wasn't executed memorably.
​
The final scene, the one set on Hateg Island, slogs on in pace, with the greatest focus being a bunch of odd-looking baby zalmos (Zalmoxes robustus) running and hiding from the real star of the episode, the robust simurgh (Hatzegopteryx thambena), looking more proper than how it looked in Planet Dinosaur. One question, though--weren't pterosaur wings supposed to be rounded at the tip? Sure, they've got the hands pointing backwards, but the pointed wingtips is now believed to be an outdated picture.
​
​
So it goes without saying that years of watching a moderate quantity of Attenborough documentaries has made the watching experience of Prehistoric Planet, at least in comparison to the original Walking with Dinosaurs, a bit numb. The creature designs are good, the CGI has not faltered in its photorealism from The Jungle Book, and even the soundtrack has enough of a score to make it memorable. But it's the stories that amount to the overall numbness of the first season. They hadn't opened my eyes in the way that Walking with Dinosaurs did.
​
​
​
When season 2 was announced literally one year after season 1, I had my doubts. Planet Earth 2 came out literally a decade after the first Planet Earth, and the differences in filming technology and musical score clearly show that. Same for the 16 years that separate The Blue Planet from Blue Planet 2. Dynasties 2, by contrast, came way too soon after the first Dynasties, and the end result is sloppy, from the stories being set at the tedious start rather than at the steady prime to the score from the first Dynasties being reused so often that the only episode to have any new music was "Meerkat". So to find Prehistoric Planet 2 come out literally one year after Prehistoric Planet, I was concerned that it'd be as shorthanded as Dynasties 2 was. The opening episode, "Islands", kind of suffered that, but it thankfully wasn't as severe a problem.
​
The first segment of that episode struck me as odd because the adult zalmo looks weirdly identical to the baby model from last episode.
​
While it is cool to see the robust simurgh being expanded upon, I personally wish we'd stayed at Hateg Island, where they'd hunt the Transylvanian dwarf duckbill (Telmatosaurus transylvanicus) and not the funky combbill (Tethyshadros insularis).
​
One of season 1's most recurring complaints is "no crocodiles", which is pretty apt when you consider how diverse they were during the Cretaceous period. So to see the Malagasy armadillo (Simosuchus clarki) at all, let alone stand up against a mahjong (Majungasaurus crenatissimus), is one to remember for the ages.
​
This next scene is actually pretty interesting, in which we see Adalatherium, which wasn't a true mammal, but rather something hovering closely outside the taxonomic boundaries. It's a long sequence, which is just as well, because this is as new a clade to me now as the cynodont was when Walking with Dinosaurs came out.
​
As with in "Ice Worlds", a quick detour to Antarctica doesn't seem necessary to me, as the hunt between the Imperobator and the Morrosaurus feels more like a skim.
​
The last scene in the episode is my personal favorite, in which a male robust simugh stands on a sandbar to do whatever it takes to impress a mate.
​
​
"Badlands" stands out in that there are only two settings. The first one is the strongest because of how the Deccan Traps, long reputed to be the co-culprit to the fall of the dinosaur empire, has been repurposed into prime nesting estate for a herd of sauropods (Isisaurus colberti). The journey seems reckless, but volcanic sand is hot and toasty, something that a modern species of dinosaur, the megapode, also exploits as it lays its egg in the hot volcanic sand of the Solomons.
​
The next scene hasn't fixed on last year's problems, in which Velociraptor is still there and it still hasn't performed RPR--it just kicks an herbivore off a cliff, and that was that.
​
The nesting Corythoraptor scene didn't interest me, but what really bugged me was that the antagonist of that sequence was a kuru (Kuru kulla), a raptor who, like the pterosaurs on the "Coasts" episode, was based on incomplete, fragmentary specimens.
​
The sequence with the tarchias (Tarchia, species unknown), is a refreshing detour from the previous sequence because we have a better idea as to what they would have looked like. And to see them slog around for an oasis is a second highlight (next to the Deccan nursery).
​
This next scene has nothing new added from either "Time of the Titans" or "Alpha's Egg", in which a herd of baby sauropods gets picked on by larger predators on their way to the safety of the forest.
​
​
The majority of the "Freshwater" sequences I feel fit better in "Swamps". The same unnamed pterosaurs from "Freshwater" have reappeared, this time trying to fly past an approaching population of alligators (Shamosuchus djadochtaensis).
​
The next episode features a grizzly bear gathering of austroraptors (Austroraptor cabazai) hunting gar. It stands out as highly as it does because it shows a species of raptor that looks and acts differently from the usual velo or nych. Plus, we know many miles more about austroraptors than we do about Spinosaurus, so that is a relieving plus.
​
The devil frog stands out in this episode, and to see a grumpy male try to fight off a herd of goavambe (Rapetosaurus krausei) is humorous. It also deviates from the usual picture of "the frog that eats dinosaurs".
​
This next sequence I was very concerned the moment I saw it in the ads. Thanks to Jack Horner, the poorly-known family Pachycephalosauridae has been under very hot fire with the notion of bone sponginess being a taxonomically viable method of identification, which it really isn't because all amniotes have spongy bones in their teens. But very thankfully, this sequence does not resort to Hornerism. It shows that older males do get longer horns on the backs of their heads, not the other way around. Also, new evidence has shown that the domes may have been covered in shiny skin, so this has me asking--is the dome a boys-only trait? Could that dracorex (Pachycephalosaurus hogwartsia) skull that I saw at the Black Hills Museum just be a girl entering her sweet 16 when she died? Could those stygimoloch (Pachycephalosaurus spinifer) skulls just be those of high school footballers?
​
"Swamps" ended on a high note with a couple of t-rexes hunting an anatotitan (Edmontosaurus annectens) in the dark. One just walks to the duckbill, and the animal, in its panic, goes right in the direction of the other t-rex in hiding. This perfectly reflects the current understanding that t-rexes exchanged fast running for better walking. Now can we see some duckbills fighting back, please?
​
​
On May 26, The Little Mermaid came out in theaters. A day earlier, "Oceans" came out. If I were to choose, I'd stick to the latter, simply because we're treated to fresh new stories with a wider variety of mosasaurs and ammonites than any of the Walking with programs ever did. The scene with the hesperorns chasing bait fish only to have themselves be chased by bulldog fish (Xiphactinus) is a classic, but a good one. However, "X-fish"? What's wrong with "bulldog fish"? But the highlight, no doubt, is the final sequence, in which a Hoffmann's mosasaur killed a juvenile plesiosaur simply by ramming it great white style.
​
​
"Freshwater" was weak due to being sorely unfocused. "North America", by contrast, is even weaker for being too rushed. Also, the "scars make the man" narrative with the trikes bugs me the most. What justification is there for that?
​
​
​
​
This has been a very exhaustive review of Prehistoric Planet, and it's way too early for me to worry about a season 3 coming out, if there is going to be one.

As you continue to build your business, you are always faced with the everyday query: “how do I get more (paid) users?"
Some days, you get rewarded with more signups. Other days, you are stuck in a rut.
“What Happens When You Are Not Getting More Users Registering with You?”

• Hitting a plateau. Your growth is stalled when it comes to the amount of users that you are onboarding for your startup. This can be a problem when you are trying to keep more users from canceling their service with you.
  
• Need to generate more traction, faster. Another problem with having stalled user growth is that you need to get more users to sign up with your product so you can generate more profit for your company.
  

The Bounce Rate is too damn high. When people don’t stay on your website long enough, you are missing out on potential conversions (and sales).
People are still confused about your product. Another reason why people are leaving your site is because they don't fully understand how you can help them.
“Can Video Fix This Problem For Me?”
There is no silver bullet but there is one tool that you can always use to get more users to sign up with your tool: video.
With video, you can:

• keep people on your website longer. This ranks your website higher in the search rankings so more people can find you.
  
• explain your product better so that they can understand how your product works. This means that more people will sign up at your website.
  
• reach your potential customers on various platforms and hold their attention longer. This helps separate you from your competitors who are using text.
  

With an audience reach of 92% (Statista), you can reach your potential customers much more easily.
“Just Add Video”
Of course, just saying “just add video” is not going to be enough for you to get the results that you are looking for on your website.
So, here are 4 methods that you can use video to drive higher conversions for your website.
Creating a High-Converting Landing Page Video To Create a Great First Impression
If you want to show off how your product works, video is a great medium to use.
With video, you can explain how your product works and to answer pressing questions within less time that it takes for your visitor to read everything on your website.
With that said, you can still ruin your chances of showcasing a great first impression.
For example,

• your landing page video runs longer than 75 seconds. Anything longer risks your audience not finishing the video completely. If you want higher conversions, keep your landing page video to 75 seconds or less.
  
• your landing page video is below-the-fold. The best place to place your landing page video is dead center where your audience can see it. By hiding it below the fold, you are losing conversions outright.
  

If you can keep your landing page video straightforward, visually engaging, and above-the-fold, you can convert a percentage of your audience members into onboarding into your funnel.
(“We actually create high-converting videos for companies. If you are interested in having a great video created for you, you can get started with a free high-converting landing page script here”: https://airtable.com/shrkjId5WjEGOqIZy)
Use a Growth-Driven Content Calendar to Track Results
Just because you have a landing page video does not mean that it is sunshines-and-roses.
How do you know if your landing page video is working?
If you are not keeping track of your KPI’s, then you are missing valuable data that you can use in order to drive more conversions for your website.
Beyond just using a landing page video, you can use video throughout your content marketing campaign.
You can set up a spreadsheet to act as your Growth Model that tracks some of the following KPI’s:

• Average Watch Time. The average percentage of the viewers who watch your videos from beginning-to-end.
• Conversion Rate. The percentage of people who onboarded onto your CTA (call-to-action) versus the total traffic of your content.
  
• # of Engaged Leads. The total number of leads who are actively responsive to your calls.
  

Whatever KPIs are most important for your company, you can use video to test whether it rises or falls.
Be More Personal with a Demo Video.
You can use video in a Demo Video where you are speaking directly to your potential visitor who is more interested in learning more about how your product actively functions.
A Demo Video is usually a moderately long video where you are explaining the features more in-depth.
It should be stated that a demo video (in most cases) should not be your landing page video.
Your landing page video is your first impression that gets your website visitor excited about your product.
Your demo video (especially if it is just you talking directly to your audience) should be more personal as you are describing more specific features on your product works for your end audience.
By using a public-friendly landing page video with a softer, personal demo video, you can get your audience excited and then calm them down when you explain the features more in-depth.
Prove that Your Product Works with Video Testimonials!
Using video testimonials is key to adding more conversions for your company.
The truth is that text reviews can be faked. I know….because I have seen it.
However, if you can use a video testimonial on your website, then you can showcase that your product is actually functional and that it works!
Adding to that, you can leverage a new library of copy onto your website that your end customer is giving you onto your website.
By using video testimonials, you can get more people on board into your funnel.
You Can Use Video in 4 Great Ways!
With these 4 tips, you can craft a highly optimized video to convert more of your traffic right away.
With a landing page video that shows off of your website, your viewers are excited to learn more about your product.
With a demo video, you can personally describe how your product works and how they can use your product in a way that fits their workflow.
With video testimonials, you can show that your product works the way that it is supposed to.
And with a content calendar, you can track how video benefits your marketing.
By using video throughout your content marketing campaign and on your landing page, you can keep your viewers more engaged as they pay more attention to you in a world full of noise.
If you are interested in having a high-converting landing page video crafted for you, click here so we can get started to creating the best first impression for you.

As you continue to build your business, you are always faced with the everyday query: “how do I get more (paid) users?"
Some days, you get rewarded with more signups. Other days, you are stuck in a rut.
“What Happens When You Are Not Getting More Users Registering with You?”

• Hitting a plateau. Your growth is stalled when it comes to the amount of users that you are onboarding for your startup. This can be a problem when you are trying to keep more users from canceling their service with you.
  
• Need to generate more traction, faster. Another problem with having stalled user growth is that you need to get more users to sign up with your product so you can generate more profit for your company.
  

The Bounce Rate is too damn high. When people don’t stay on your website long enough, you are missing out on potential conversions (and sales).
People are still confused about your product. Another reason why people are leaving your site is because they don't fully understand how you can help them.
“Can Video Fix This Problem For Me?”
There is no silver bullet but there is one tool that you can always use to get more users to sign up with your tool: video.
With video, you can:

• keep people on your website longer. This ranks your website higher in the search rankings so more people can find you.
  
• explain your product better so that they can understand how your product works. This means that more people will sign up at your website.
  
• reach your potential customers on various platforms and hold their attention longer. This helps separate you from your competitors who are using text.
  

With an audience reach of 92% (Statista), you can reach your potential customers much more easily.
“Just Add Video”
Of course, just saying “just add video” is not going to be enough for you to get the results that you are looking for on your website.
So, here are 4 methods that you can use video to drive higher conversions for your website.
Creating a High-Converting Landing Page Video To Create a Great First Impression
If you want to show off how your product works, video is a great medium to use.
With video, you can explain how your product works and to answer pressing questions within less time that it takes for your visitor to read everything on your website.
With that said, you can still ruin your chances of showcasing a great first impression.
For example,

• your landing page video runs longer than 75 seconds. Anything longer risks your audience not finishing the video completely. If you want higher conversions, keep your landing page video to 75 seconds or less.
  
• your landing page video is below-the-fold. The best place to place your landing page video is dead center where your audience can see it. By hiding it below the fold, you are losing conversions outright.
  

If you can keep your landing page video straightforward, visually engaging, and above-the-fold, you can convert a percentage of your audience members into onboarding into your funnel.
(“We actually create high-converting videos for companies. If you are interested in having a great video created for you, you can get started with a free high-converting landing page script here”: https://airtable.com/shrkjId5WjEGOqIZy)
Use a Growth-Driven Content Calendar to Track Results
Just because you have a landing page video does not mean that it is sunshines-and-roses.
How do you know if your landing page video is working?
If you are not keeping track of your KPI’s, then you are missing valuable data that you can use in order to drive more conversions for your website.
Beyond just using a landing page video, you can use video throughout your content marketing campaign.
You can set up a spreadsheet to act as your Growth Model that tracks some of the following KPI’s:

• Average Watch Time. The average percentage of the viewers who watch your videos from beginning-to-end.
• Conversion Rate. The percentage of people who onboarded onto your CTA (call-to-action) versus the total traffic of your content.
  
• # of Engaged Leads. The total number of leads who are actively responsive to your calls.
  

Whatever KPIs are most important for your company, you can use video to test whether it rises or falls.
Be More Personal with a Demo Video.
You can use video in a Demo Video where you are speaking directly to your potential visitor who is more interested in learning more about how your product actively functions.
A Demo Video is usually a moderately long video where you are explaining the features more in-depth.
It should be stated that a demo video (in most cases) should not be your landing page video.
Your landing page video is your first impression that gets your website visitor excited about your product.
Your demo video (especially if it is just you talking directly to your audience) should be more personal as you are describing more specific features on your product works for your end audience.
By using a public-friendly landing page video with a softer, personal demo video, you can get your audience excited and then calm them down when you explain the features more in-depth.
Prove that Your Product Works with Video Testimonials!
Using video testimonials is key to adding more conversions for your company.
The truth is that text reviews can be faked. I know….because I have seen it.
However, if you can use a video testimonial on your website, then you can showcase that your product is actually functional and that it works!
Adding to that, you can leverage a new library of copy onto your website that your end customer is giving you onto your website.
By using video testimonials, you can get more people on board into your funnel.
You Can Use Video in 4 Great Ways!
With these 4 tips, you can craft a highly optimized video to convert more of your traffic right away.
With a landing page video that shows off of your website, your viewers are excited to learn more about your product.
With a demo video, you can personally describe how your product works and how they can use your product in a way that fits their workflow.
With video testimonials, you can show that your product works the way that it is supposed to.
And with a content calendar, you can track how video benefits your marketing.
By using video throughout your content marketing campaign and on your landing page, you can keep your viewers more engaged as they pay more attention to you in a world full of noise.
If you are interested in having a high-converting landing page video crafted for you, click here so we can get started to creating the best first impression for you.

This is a weekly reminder post of this sub's stance on potential copyright infringement. This is a serious issue that needs to be kept in mind when creating and listing NFTs.
Original post by u/HurleyBird1
Quick disclaimer: I AM NOT A LAWYER. THIS IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE - THIS IS SIMPLY INFORMATION WITH WHICH TO EDUCATE YOURSELVES AND PREPARE YOURSELF FOR LEGAL ADVICE FROM A LICENSED SOURCE.
Now that that's out of the way. My credentials are: MBA, with a bit of business law classes under my belt.
I want to give a quick explanation of how copyright works - and I'll do so through quick blurbs n some myth/reality bullets.
Source: copyright.gov (US)

1. Subject matter of copyright: In general28(a) Copyright protection subsists, in accordance with this title, in original works of authorship fixed in any tangible medium of expression, now known or later developed, from which they can be perceived, reproduced, or otherwise communicated, either directly or with the aid of a machine or device. Works of authorship include the following categories:(1) literary works;(2) musical works, including any accompanying words;(3) dramatic works, including any accompanying music;(4) pantomimes and choreographic works;(5) pictorial, graphic, and sculptural works;(6) motion pictures and other audiovisual works;(7) sound recordings; and(8) architectural works.(b) In no case does copyright protection for an original work of authorship extend to any idea, procedure, process, system, method of operation, concept, principle, or discovery, regardless of the form in which it is described, explained, illustrated, or embodied in such work.

- Myth: I can use any image/song/video/writing I want.
- Reality: No. Not true at all.
- Myth: Well they never said it's copyrighted.
- Reality: Upon publication (and even while a work in progress) a work is automatically protected via copyright under US Law.
- Myth: Well they never sold it.
- Reality: It doesn't have to be commercialized to be protected.
- Myth: Well it was a long time ago
- Reality: Possibly true...as long as the creator is deceased (or if multiple creators, the last living one is deceased) and the required time has passed...although this gets tricky with "estates."
(d) Duration of Rights.—(1) With respect to works of visual art created on or after the effective date set forth in section 610(a) of the Visual Artists Rights Act of 1990, the rights conferred by subsection (a) shall endure for a term consisting of the life of the author.
So what's this thing I hear called "Fair Use?"
Straight from the source:

1. Limitations on exclusive rights: Fair use41Notwithstanding the provisions of sections 106 and 106A, the fair use of a copyrighted work, including such use by reproduction in copies or phonorecords or by any other means specified by that section, for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching (including multiple copies for classroom use), scholarship, or research, is not an infringement of copyright. In determining whether the use made of a work in any particular case is a fair use the factors to be considered shall include—(1) the purpose and character of the use, including whether such use is of a commercial nature or is for nonprofit educational purposes;(2) the nature of the copyrighted work;(3) the amount and substantiality of the portion used in relation to the copyrighted work as a whole; and(4) the effect of the use upon the potential market for or value of the copyrighted work.The fact that a work is unpublished shall not itself bar a finding of fair use if such finding is made upon consideration of all the above factors.

Uhh...help me translate that please... (here's a decent official translation: https://www.copyright.gov/fair-use/more-info.html)

1. above...if it's non-profit educational use, you're usually good to go...if it's for money or trade (commercial nature) then you're usually NOT...unless YOUR piece is "transformative"

Transformative uses are those that add something new, with a further purpose or different character, and do not substitute for the original use of the work.
- Myth: Well this is paid for in Algos, not USD so it's not "commercial"
- Reality: IT IS commercial. You could even barter for bacon and it'd be commercial. It's an exchange of one good/service for another good/service.
- Myth: My piece with Batman inside a card is "transformative"
- Reality: No, unfortunately, more-than-likely the courts would say it's not. A good litmus test is..."If Warner Bros Entertainment (owner of Batman) wanted to make an NFT/ASA "Batman card" would yours compete with it or be possibly mistaken (by a reasonable person - so in America think 8th grade education) for real merchandise? Probably...thus it's not transformative enough.
"nature" gets a little tougher. This looks at protecting the "creative process." Thus, using other works of art is less-likely to be protected than using factual sources - like historical photographs since it's easier to "create art" and thus "transform" factual pieces than other art pieces. This is also talking to things like "parody." Satire is NOT protected. "Parody" is. What's the difference? LegalZoomputs it well: While a parody targets and mimics the original work to make a point, a satire uses the original work to criticize something else entirely. Another way to look at it is that satire uses another work as a way to comment on something happening in the world that has nothing to do with the original work.
- Myth: I added a different border, extra planets, and some blur effect to MTZ's World of Light - it's a new piece of art.
- Reality: Not likely the courts will see it that way.
- Myth: This guy added a filter, some burn effects, and collaged a bunch of newspaper headlines together - isn't that a violation!
- Reality: Probably not...the courts would probably see this as a creation of art out of factual sources.
amount/substantiality in relation to the whole...this is where using clips of songs that are only like 5 seconds long works! But using more than that...runs into problems. This is tough to decipher too...as some songs are EASILY identifiable from just 5 seconds (Ice, ice, baby) - and thus NOT fair use. But some aren't. Usually you're safe using a very small clip of a song or video - especially if you're adding more to it. But this is a dangerous game to play - and there's places to get free audio (some sources below)
effect of the use - this is probably the biggest one. Courts will look at simply...does YOUR work affect the sales or potential for sales of the copyright owner. Of note...this is looked at at the time of the issue being brought to the court, not at the time of sale. For example, let's say my batman card sells for 10 Algos today, but Algorand BLOWS UP and soon every NFT is on Algorand. And now my OG Batman NFT is seen as one of the first Batman ones and official. Warner Bros gonna sue the shit outta whoever owns it at the time they sue to get the rights to all sales of that NFT. So that person is left holding an empty bag when Warner Bros wins in court.
- Myth: Well they're not commercializing it NOW so I'm safe.
- Reality: Technically, yea Warner Bros probably won't spend the money to go after the OG artist and the hands the asset passed through...HOWEVER, they may. That's their right. Who knows - the Napster days showed us the lengths companies will go to. EVEN BIGGER HOWEVER, the last person holding it when Warner Bros DOES decide to go after that Batman NFT...uh oh for them - they just lost their asset.
- Myth: Well it's been like a year, and no one has brought up copyright. So I'm good.
- Reality: If this was in a normal market...maybe this argument would work. If McDonald's let you sell a Ronald McDonald poster for like a year on Amazon with no issues, some court may say "bro, you took too long to bring this to us." HOWEVER, with cryptocurrency being so new (and Algorand being so little known/discussed), most courts would see it as "reasonable" that a copyright owner failed to exercise their rights within a year - possibly even a decade. (Updated because I realized last example dealt with trademark not copyright :o)
So what am I safe to use?
US Government works (mostly)...any deemed free to use by creator...and any a copyright lawyer says they have your backs on (cuz now they're liable).
Here's some great sources for free use items (please add to this list below if you know of some!!!):
Pictures: https://buffer.com/library/free-images/ (Unsplash is one of my faves)
Music: https://www.wix.com/blog/photography/2019/11/27/free-music-for-videos/
Video: https://blog.hootsuite.com/free-stock-videos-sites/
You'll notice there's a lot of "shoulds" "coulds" "probably" etc. This is because copyright cases are all unique and go to the courts. The best bet is to go with stuff you KNOW is free and fair-use. If not, I'd look up copyright law, consult supreme court cases concerning copyright, and ultimately, talk to a lawyer.
AGAIN: I AM NOT A LAWYER. I AM NOT PROVIDING LEGAL ADVICE. I AM SIMPLY PROVIDING INFORMATION. THERE MAY BE ERRORS ABOVE THAT COULD CAUSE SUBSTANTIAL DAMAGES - CONSULT A COPYRIGHT ATTORNEY IF YOU WISH TO RECEIVE LEGAL ADVICE.

I am going to attempt to be as u biased, neutral and transparent as I possibly can, because I really need help in knowing if I'm just not seeing things clearly. As the result is ending a marriage with the only person I've ever loved on this level, so it would be terrible if I'm just living in delusion. Thank you in advance for your help, comments, opinions, hard truths and experiences.
My wife and I have been married for two and a half years. We dated two to three years prior to that. She asked me to marry her and I enthusiastically and lovingly said, "YES!"
Our relationship started after we met each other in an A.A. community. Now, please understand, I believe it looked like this. We knew each other, we worked on ourselves and after two years of knowing each other, after we each did a lot of work and became healthy, we decided to start dating. So, it wasn't a hookup at first sight type of ordeal... just to add some clarity.
After we started dating about 9 months in, I had a relapse, I must admit it was bad, as I overdosed and wound up in the hospital.
I got back on track again, we mended, or so I thought, and we rented a duplex together. Up until this point we were living separately. She was living on her own, with her daughter at the time, and I was living with a roommate.
When we got the duplex, her daughter moved in with us, and eventually her son. Now that we had more space, she was able to get to more placement custody of her to youngest son from another marriage. Since we were becoming healthier and healthier, we were able to clean up our past and began to make good futures together for ourselves and each other.
I must admit, at first her kids were a handful. Her and her daughter fought daily. Yelling, screaming... the works. 6am waking up to two women yelling at the top of their lungs. Everything basically except physical violence. And I put up with it and let them begin to work out and grow their relationship. As for her son, now that we had space, he began to live with us too, because their dad isn't the best person, to put it nicely.
She has an entirely different relationship with her son than her daughter. They are basically best friends and she enables him to the end of the earth. Yet, I put up with that as well and allowed their relationship to grow.
Enter her youngest from another marriage. He has a learning disability, is 80% deaf, is on the autism spectrum and is in a situation where he will always need special care and not be able to live on his own. He has tantrums, is defiant and has the comprehension of about a five year old... he's 13 now. He began to stay with us a couple of days a week, to a few days a week.
While we were renting she asked me to marry her and I said yes.
We bought a house together. Her daughter did not move in with us because her relationship with her mom is better with them living apart. She moved out when she was 16. Her oldest son of course came with us, and now we had her youngest one week on, one week off.
Of course, I accepted all this because they are her kids and I love her. Even though it's challenging because the twenty year old son isn't expected to do anything and she's constantly after me to take out the trash, clean this, clean that. I tell her, I pay a majority percent of the bills and have a demanding job, I will do these things when I have an opportunity, but if you need it done right now, ask your son. But of course she will not do that. He rarelt cleans his room, he doesn't cut the grass, he doesn't snowblow, he isn't responsible for a single chore. Yet, he doesn't pay rent.
I take that back. His chore is the trash. And this is how it goes...
On trash day, all day long she has to constantly remind him. Asking him to go do it because hes not doing anything at the moment, yet he states he's busy and will do it later. So in the evening, sonce of course it's not taken out yet, she goes around the entire house and collects all the trash and bags it up and puts it by the back door. Then it's still not done when we go to bed, so she reminds him again. All he has to do is move it out the door three feet to put it in the trash can and walk the trash can to the street. And that's called "being responsible to take care of the trash". The trash can then stays on the street for 4 days after trash pickup while she constantly asks him to put it up. And this is a weekly affair without fail.
His room is freaking disgusting too! He has to keep his room door shut because otherwise it will smell up the entire upstairs.
However, I should take care of the majority of chores. When we have a 20 year old living in the house that doesn't help with much at all.
Also, because I work from home, her perception is that I can watch her youngest son, while I'm home so she can go to work. And she gets agitated out when I tell her I can't.
I wind up taking care of her son about 30% to her 70% throughout the week on a solo basis. Meaning solo, when we are not together. What this looks like is... making sure he gets to the bathroom, feeding him, putting him to bed. If he has a bathroom accident, cleaning that up. And remember, more often than not, because he's challenged, he's defiant. So it hard... but it's not his fault.
Yet, she says I don't do anything to help her.
She became a substance abuse counselor and has been sober for seven years, yet recently, the past two years has been smoking weed daily. And she smokes weed with her underage daughter and son in a state where it's not legal.
She even lost her wedding rings, which were my late grandmother's that my mom gave to me to give to her. We were on a camping trip and she was stoned and misplaced them. No real remorse and to this day she has never apologized or even brought the topic up to my mom.
My part... I got on suboxone and I believe it works really well for me. I didn't tell her about it because if she has an opposing opinion on something, it's impossible to talk to her and have an adult conversation about it. And then prepare to be berated.
Of course she found out and now holds the opinion that I am a liar. And I lie about everything. Just because I didn't tell her about this, or that every now and again, I used recreationally. However, she can talk to me about the fact that she smokes weed, because I can have an open mind to that choice and hold a conversation with her. I though can't talk to her about things that goes against her opinions. So I just don't and I keep those things to myself. She finds out of course and then calls me a liar. When the root cause, I believe, is that she can not communicate or be open-minded to anything she disagrees with.
She constantly tells me I gaslight her and that I'm mentally sick and suffer from depression.
The reason she says I'm depressed is because since she became a counselor, it is her entire life now and she goes around diagnosing everyone. She tells a story about this person and then says, "Oh yeah, definitely this diagnosis." Or is talking about another person and in the conversation states, "absolutely x mental illness."
I feel like I don't have a wife anymore. I feel like I have a mom, because I'm constantly asked to do chores rather than her asking her son, and I have a live-in counselor.
The fact is, I cook more than she does. And clean exactly as much as she does. Plus take care of the outside and mechanical or fix-it needs. She has terrible perception. I just don't go around announcing when I do things as she does. For example she says, "Today I washed clothes, did this, did that." I just do it, and don't make a big deal over it.
She comes home from work and for the next two hours is a conversation of how busy she is. I run a company with eight retail stores and multiple divisions, and I'm thinking... oh boy, that's not even close to how busy I am. Yet I'm not constantly complaining about it. And yet I'm thought to have more time than her.
She never gives me credit for helping out with her youngest. She never gives me credit for housekeeping. She never gives me credit for financial support. She never gives me credit for taking in her three kids. She never gives me credit for committing to taking care of her youngest for the rest of our lives. As well as taking care of him solo. Also, I've never had kids... so all this is very new and challenging to me.
She says I have to go to treatment to have my depression taken care of and I need to get off suboxone. I went to a clinician and they said I don't have depression. She thinks I have depression simply because I'm miserable in my relationship and that what she sees. And I told her that and she said, "I can't make you have depressive symptoms. You were in the bed until 1pm today!" Yeah I was in the "bedroom" today until 1pm, because I didn't want to be around you nagging me to do something or calling me a liar or telling me I'm mentally ill!
She says our marital problems are 100% on me and I need to get off suboxone and take care of my mental illness and stop lying to her.
I said... we are equal contributors to our marital problems and we should go to marriage counseling and let a professional direct us on what to work on.
She told me that she's the perfect wife and that it feels wrong going to marriage counseling because she's just giving in to my gaslighting and I need to fix my problems first as they are the main contributor to oir issues. She says the problems she exhibits would not have our marriage to the point of divorce.
I'm the one that mentioned divorce. She said she doesn't want one. I love her and I don't want one but I can't continue living like this.
Her solution is for me to move out the house and to get better so she can heal.
I don't want to do that.
I told her I won't do that and we may as well just get a divorce. She's literally baffled because she 100% thinks I'm fully to blame for our issues. I'm pissed she doesn't realize that a marriage is a two-way street and we are equally to blame for where it's at currently.
Should I leave the house and give her the separation? Is there any other compromise that might work? Should I run and never look back and start the divorce process?
Any insight or opinions would be greatly appreciated.

Penile traction therapy is a treatment method for Peyronie's disease that involves the use of a device to apply gentle and continuous traction to the penis. The goal of this therapy is to stretch the penile tissue and reduce curvature caused by fibrous plaques. Here are some key points about penile traction therapy:

1. Device: Penile traction devices consist of an adjustable frame or a system of rods and straps that attach to the penis. They are designed to provide controlled and consistent traction.
2. Mechanism of action: The traction force exerted by the device aims to stretch the fibrous tissue and promote remodeling of the penile tissue. It encourages the formation of new collagen fibers, which may help to reduce the curvature and improve penile straightness over time.
3. Treatment duration: Penile traction therapy is typically used for several hours per day, usually over a period of months. The specific duration and frequency of treatment may vary depending on the device and the severity of the condition. It's important to follow the instructions provided by the manufacturer or healthcare professional.
4. Potential benefits: Studies have shown that penile traction therapy can lead to improvements in penile curvature, length, and sexual function in some individuals with Peyronie's disease. However, the degree of improvement may vary from person to person.
5. Considerations: Penile traction therapy should be used under the guidance of a healthcare professional who can provide appropriate instructions and monitor your progress. It's important to use the device as directed and avoid excessive or uncomfortable traction, as this can cause discomfort or injury.
6. Combination therapy: Penile traction therapy may be used in combination with other treatments, such as medications or surgery, depending on the individual case. Your healthcare provider can recommend the most suitable combination of treatments for your specific situation.

It's crucial to consult with a healthcare professional who specializes in the treatment of Peyronie's disease to determine if penile traction therapy is appropriate for you. They can evaluate your condition, provide guidance on device selection and usage, and monitor your progress throughout the treatment.
​
I had a left curve that was becoming a problem for me. A few years ago, something went wrong and I had woken up with no sensation down there at all. I had 80% deduction in sensitivity for the entire first year after this suddenly happened. Fast forward a year from there, I got to healing to about 40% reduction. Meaning, I could feel about 60% of what I normally should in perfect nerve health. My orgasms were severely diminished in feeling and I could not sense temperature, hot or cold. Could not feel an ice cube at all on the tip or the top of my shaft. But I could on the bottom side and left and right sides of my shaft. Could not sense heat in the tip at all, or on the top as well. No doctors could help me figure this out, saw dozens. The curve got worse as I got older, currently in my 30s. I discovered Extending devices 2 months ago. Been using it with a set on the left side a bit longer than the right. After about a 3 weeks, I noticed a huge difference in curve reduction, and due to that, I gained about 0.1 inches in true length. My erections could now sustain and I never really had the ability to retain one for so long. Pain also reduced drastically during "pleasing". I am told there was likely a kink in my fleshy bits that was relieving itself of pressure, allowing for more constant blood flow which is why my erections stayed erect. 2 months in now. My curve is went from an 78 degree left angle curve to just over 82 degrees. That is a massive improvement in curvature. I am now about 0.2inches longer than I was and about 0.1 inches thicker. (all measurements done by my new urologist who recommended this for me) He says I just never noticed it, but the damage interior was restricting a full erection all my life and I never really had a benchmark to know better. What I thought was hard and 100%, wasn't. It wasn't giving bloodflow enough on the left interior kinked area. I don't do anything but use the extender here. I wake up most mornings with an erection, which I almost never did before. And I am able to enjoy "pleasing" things and feel much more than I did after my sensation loss. The extender has helped me not just fix the curve, but also started forcing healing into the nerves. I can feel cold and heat, subtle, but its there, and I can actually sense it now.I am literally in tears. It is amazing to wear this , and feel the sensation of the stretch. When showering, I can feel some warmth now. But, at this rate, doctor says that I can expect more sensation repair and more curvature repair in the coming month onward into one year, so I long as I do not overdo it and take my time with it.
i was using sizegenetics Penile Traction Therapy to fix my problem https://sizegenetics.com/curvature-straightening

Hi all,
Thanks again for the help in this sub. I've completed my first two months of bookings with Airbnb and am looking to improve the financial results.
You can have a quick look at the financials here: https://www.screencast.com/t/wfZ3Z1mt
My question is if others are seeing similar levels of expenses. I was so focused on topline improvement with STR, I think I undershot the expenses. I'm considering if I can come out better with long term renting, or trying to find mid-term rentals since I already have the furniture.
Anything stand out as completely out of balance?
Do I need to give it time to level out? I know my maintenence expenses are elevated due to having my mailbox runover multiple times due to construction in the area. I also had to fix a dryer issue and a small HVAC issue. I generally expect maintenence to be low as I've completely renovated the place and everything is new. I have no defered maintenence issues.
Comments:
- Please ignore the hotel taxes income/expense lines. I have that in there for visibility to me on what was collected vs. owed, as I was (am) still trying to get that straight with the state & city. This should be a wash with future reservations now that I have it loaded in my listing properly.
- The management fee is me paying me because I have some investors in the property, so I'm quantifying the effort provided to manage everything, pay the taxes, pay for software, communicate, etc. etc.
- You'll note that I don't have any debt service here, as I'm not counting that against my co-investors since they provided cash. To secure the deal from my end, I had to provide cash and also take out the mortgage, but I have the higher ownership of the property. You can guess that the money left over is not covering the debt.
Reflections on what I could do are below. I'm not sure what my return will be on these efforts, so any thoughts on quantifying this are welcome.
- It seems clear that the longer the stay, the more profitable in general due to how much cleaning eats up the revenue by percent for shorter stays.
- I have not looked for how I would drive mid-term stays - over 30 days avoids hotel tax for state and city in my area
- I have not worked out incentives for weekly/monthly stays, so I could do this
- I have not listed the property on VRBO to capture the additional lead funnel
- I have not attempted to generate any social media attention for the property
- I have not attempted to create a funnel for direct bookings

I don’t know if any of you have noticed, but the last few years have been wild for airline travel. It seems like not even a week can pass before a new viral video is circulating the internet, showcasing some idiot on a plane or airport screaming, shouting, and even starting fights with other passengers and flight staff for no apparent reason.
I’m sure it’s entertaining when you’re sitting at home and come across these videos while casually scrolling through Reddit or Twitter. You might laugh, or shake your head at the stupidity and not give it a second thought. Unfortunately, this isn’t an option when you’re the one on the job.
I can’t even count the number of times I’ve had to call security to deal with a rowdy or straight-up violent customer in the airport over the last couple of years. Most of the time, the things that set people off are surprisingly minor and avoidable issues.
They want to board now but it wasn’t their turn so they start harassing me and my co-workers. Another passenger looked at them funny so they get into a screaming match. A baby is crying so the grown adult starts whining even louder. The person in front of them took the last chocolate donut with sprinkles from the airport bakery so they start throwing punches.
You would not believe the stuff I’ve seen. Needless to say, I got tired of it. Getting up to go to work, wondering what kind of unhinged maniac was going to make a problem for me lost its appeal. So, I started to look for a new job.
A few weeks into the job search, I began to get doubtful that I would find a suitable replacement. Seeing as my only tangible skills and experience were in the airline industry, I didn’t have much more than other airline jobs within realistic reach. Though I didn’t have a problem with relocation, if it meant I was going to end up in another major airport, I had no interest.
During one 3 am job search after my long shift at the airport, running on nothing but the jittery movements from the room-temperature coffee, I found a new job listing. One Pine Airport, a rural airport in the midwest. I sat up and took another sip of coffee. The pictures for the place gave an idea of the size and it looked tiny. Only a couple of runways, a single terminal, and a cute internal design reflective of the forestry that surrounded it. Perfect for me, I thought. I imagined there would not be nearly as many people to deal with.
I scrolled down to the job details and to my relief, it was for the exact same job I had already been doing. The only difference was that it required frequent night shifts. I had done plenty of night shifts before, but doing a few more of them made no difference to me. Surprisingly listed was the pay. I couldn’t believe my eyes. They were offering more starting than I was being paid at the airport I had been at for over three years.
Now wide awake, I eagerly uploaded my resume, filled out all of the application questions, and even spent the next hour crafting an unnecessary cover letter. I headed to bed with the hope that my days at overflowing airports might be over. The next day as I was getting ready for work, I opened my phone to scroll through notifications and check emails.
To my disbelief, I had one from the job I had applied for only hours earlier. The manager at the airport, who had posted the job, requested an interview over Zoom. I quickly replied and we settled on a time during my lunch break that very day.
The first few hours of work breezed by and as I boarded flight after flight of passengers, I couldn’t help but think about the upcoming interview. When it came time, I was nervous as hell but my fears were diffused within the first minute. A bald, well-kept, and well-dressed man joined the meeting room and greeted me with a warm smile. He introduced himself as James.
I couldn’t have asked for a more friendly interviewer. He welcomed me and after some small talk and a few questions about my relevant experience, he gave an overview of the job's details, that being the same job I already had with better pay but more frequent night shifts. No problem with me. After affirming that I knew all the details of the job, James cracked another wide, friendly smile and asked an unexpected question.
“When can you start?”
I spit the out sip of coffee I had just taken back into the cup. I looked back up at James and tried to find the right words but I was unprepared.
“You uh… aren’t gonna give me a call back like later or something? Don’t you have more interviews and… and paperwork waiting to clear and, and…?”
James waved his hand dismissively at his webcam.
“You’re the only applicant we have, and we couldn’t have asked for a better one. As for the paperwork and such, we’ll figure that out when we figure it out. The job is yours, whenever you can start, that is. Preferably soon?”
Though the feelings of shock and confusion remained, they were pushed to the side by my excitement. Throughout the remainder of our conversation, James and I reviewed our schedules and set up a start date before ending the call. I sat back in my break room chair with a sigh of disbelief and a chuckle.
I am well aware that it is standard to give at least a two-week notice to your employer and moving across states for a job is supposed to take quite a bit of planning but I was dying to get out of my current job. Through both eagerness and maybe a little stupidity, we settled on a day only a little over a week away.
At the end of my shift that day, I let my manager know I had to be done in a week. Though she wasn’t happy, she assured me it wouldn’t be a problem.
My final day was nothing short of horrendous. A couple had come up, demanding and screaming that I refund their tickets for no apparent reason. On top of that, they still wanted to fly. After hearing that no, they would not be able to fly for zero cost, the husband, followed by the wife, both started shouting threats. Security was quickly called to the terminal.
As soon as they arrived, I checked my watch to find that my shift was over. I let out a sigh of relief and excitedly walked away. As deprived of sleep as I was, with a long and undoubtedly stressful drive ahead of me, I was still more energetic and in higher spirits than I had been in a long time.
Surprisingly, the drive went off without a hitch. I arrived earlier than expected and checked into the motel room I rented for the week so I had time to get the move figured out. After dumping a few boxes of personal items and a suitcase of clothes into the room, I turned off the lights. I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow.
I energetically awoke that evening to prepare myself for my first shift. I quickly got dressed and started the drive in hopes of arriving plenty early. Naively, I hadn’t considered how my unfamiliarity with the roads would slow me down, and after a staggering amount of wrong turns, I arrived at the little airport with only minutes to spare.
The airport was even smaller in person than I had imagined it to be from the pictures. I quickly walked through the entrance and was greeted by the small team of security. After notifying them that I was there for work and that James had been waiting for me, they hurried me through without so much as a question. The security, the architecture, the beautiful scenery that surrounded it, nothing about this airport couldn’t have felt more welcoming.
I walked through to find the single terminal inside, devoid of any passengers, with James sitting behind a counter at the end. After a moment he looked up and upon making eye contact with me, his tired face lit up. I was about to apologize for my tardiness but didn’t have the chance as he rushed to show me the employee locker room where he had my new employee uniform and badge waiting inside my very own locker. He told me to get changed and to meet him outside right away.
I did as he asked and within a couple of minutes, I walked out to find him back behind the console at the counter, gathering his belongings. He noticed me approaching and glanced up, thanking me for showing up and starting so soon as he handed me a fresh cup of coffee. He also apologized for not being able to stick around long for my shift but he sounded sure that he wasn’t all that worried.
“I have to be going now, I’ve been on duty for 17 hours. I know you’re plenty familiar with our systems and software, you know what you’re doing.”
He assured me with a pat on the back before walking out from the desk. He turned and added
“It’ll be a quiet night for you anyway. No flights scheduled. Just sit back, relax, and uh... Oh yeah. Most importantly, I nearly forgot”.
He reached into his bag and pulled out a single sheet of laminated paper and held it in front of me.
“Give this a read as soon as you can. Go over it a few times if you need, don’t deviate from it”.
I took it but before I could even get a look, I noticed James begin to walk toward the exit, along with every single one of the security guards and the cashier who had just closed down the only shop in the airport. I then noticed that all of the scanners and metal detectors at the security gate were shut off. I started to panic.
“Hey! James? Where is everyone going?”
I shouted. The first words I had managed to speak to my new boss since arriving. He stopped and turned back again
“Oh yeah. Another thing I ought to have mentioned. Everyone except whoever is working the night shift in, well, your position takes off right around now. Don’t worry, security will be back sometime around 5 am. You’ve got this place to yourself. Grab a magazine from the little store in there if you get bored. Feel free to snag yourself a couple of snacks too”.
He began to walk away again before briefly turning and pointing at me.
“But before you do anything, read that list. You’ll need it”.
I stood, dumbfounded as I watched my new boss along with all of the other airport staff leave. I started to wrap my head around the fact that I had an empty airport to myself for 10 hours, with nothing to do and no one to deal with, all while I was getting paid the highest wage I had ever earned.
As much as thinking about it delighted me, I turned my attention turned toward the sheet of paper I almost forgot I was holding on to. James said to follow whatever list was on it, so I figured I ought to take a look. I walked behind the airport counter and sank into one of the seats behind it. I took a sip of coffee and finally took a serious look.
A total of 6 rules were neatly spaced on the sheet.
Rule 1: All lights in the airport are to stay on at all times. If one is off, or if you are to accidentally turn one off, turn it back on as soon as possible. If a light seems to be broken or is out and unable to turn back on, calmly exit the area. Report the outage to James or maintenance when possible. Do not listen to the sounds. Do not listen to the voices.
Rule 2: Rule 2 pertains to rainy or stormy weather. If it is raining or storming outside, disregard rules 3, 4, and 5. They will not be a concern during these types of weather conditions. Stay inside at all times. Do not use the men’s restroom and avoid going near it entirely if possible.
Rule 3: Sometime between 11 pm and 1 am, a young woman will walk out of the women’s restroom. She will enter the terminal and sit, occasionally getting up to walk around or change seats. Her name is Elizabeth. She will attempt to make conversation but you must not reciprocate. You may look at her, you may give nonverbal communication such as a head nod, you may write as a means of communication, or you may shake her hand but do not speak to her. If you refuse to speak to her, Elizabeth should be gone within a few hours. If you happen to make such a mistake, go to the men’s restroom and wait for her to leave.
Rule 4: At around one or two in the morning, a janitor in blue coveralls will arrive at the front entrance. Crack open the door and ask for his name. If he says his name is Simon, let him in. If he gives you any name other than Simon, shut the door and lock it without another word and walk away. If the janitor is Simon, he will attend to the janitorial needs of the airport. If he asks to clean where you are standing, oblige him. Simon will not interfere with your duties otherwise. He is not hostile or dangerous. You may engage in conversation with Simon. He will leave the same way he came when he feels it is necessary.
Rule 5: At around 3 am, you may notice that a black and red Cessna Skyhawk has landed on one of the airstrips. You will never see it land, and you will never see it take off. It will just appear when you’re not looking. After spotting the plane for the first time, do not look at it again. Avoid looking in its general direction if at all possible. There is a picture of the exact plane displayed inside the terminal, behind the counter.
Rule 6: Later in the night but sometime before dawn, a group of men claiming to be from TSA may arrive at the airport. They will have their own key and let themselves in. Some could be armed. Often, they exhibit panicked behavior. They may search through the airport, sweep room to room, and ask questions. They are permitted to search anywhere in the main airport building that they please, and you may oblige to any questioning but under no circumstances are they permitted to enter the sky bridge. They will not enter without verbal approval and they cannot harm you.
After reading over it a few times, I set the laminated sheet down and leaned back further into my seat before taking a long sip of coffee, wondering what on earth I had just read. I hadn’t taken James to be the imaginative type. Most of all, I hadn’t taken him to be anywhere near the unprofessional type. Though as I thought about it, it was unusual how rushed this all was and how he left in such a hurry, leaving so few details.
I began to wonder if I was being pranked, I considered that maybe this was all some sort of messed up joke or setup. I ruled that out pretty quickly. This was, in fact, a real airport. I had done plenty of research by the time I got here. At least a few real flights were coming in or going out each day. James has been working here for years and I couldn’t think of a reason why he would jeopardize his job or reputation just to get a scare out of me.
After chuckling to myself at the absurdity of my situation, I decided to indulge and see what would happen. Maybe it was a “test” for me as a new employee. Maybe James wanted to see if I could follow orders.
After glancing at the list once more and realizing the impact rule 2 had on the number of things I would have to keep track of, I brought up my phone to check the forecast. Clear skies, not a chance for rain or storms all night. Great, I thought to myself. I had to watch out for these Elizabeth and Simon characters to show up and I suppose “not” be on the lookout for a random plane to appear on the runway.
I stood up and grabbed my coffee, walking to the glass panes. I took another sip from my cup while admiring the lit runways along the airfield. It sure was a pretty nice sight. As I was raising my cup to finish what was left, I began to hear the click of shoes on the floor somewhere behind me.
Startled, I spun around abruptly, dropping my cup and spilling the remainder of the coffee in the process. At the other end of the terminal seating stood a young woman, around her mid-twenties in my estimation. She was holding two large leather suitcases in each hand and had an old-fashioned sense of style with a skirt and heels. Most surprising was her stunning beauty and welcoming smile.
“Oh I’m sorry dear, didn’t mean to scare you”
She expressed with a sincere tone. I opened my mouth, ready to assure her that everything was fine but I stopped myself. I recalled the list. At this point, I was certain that she was here at James’s request, a paid actor determined to make me break the rules. I was more determined not to. Instead, I simply fixed my posture, straightened my uniform, and looked back with a smile.
She walked to the counter where she placed her leather suitcases on the ground before closing the distance between us.
“Looks like we’ve got this fabulous airport all to ourselves. I am Elizabeth”
She said, reaching out her hand. I shook it, but she didn’t seem quite satisfied.
“And your name?”
I continued to smile and lock eye contact. Her grin grew for a moment before she remarked
“You don’t seem to be much of a talkative one”
And with that, she turned and started to walk away. I returned to my seat behind the counter, watching her closely as I did. Elizabeth proceeded to the unattended airport shop and after a couple of minutes of looking over magazine covers and occasionally taking a peek inside, she returned carrying a small stack of reading material. She approached my counter before placing a National Geographic magazine in front of me.
“I figured you might like this one. Enjoy”
She said, winking before settling on a seat in the first row of the terminal, straight across from where I had been sitting.
Remarkably, her intuition was spot on. I may have lived in cities all of my life but I loved nature, despite how little of it I had gotten to see. National Geographic was a favorite of mine, one I had been familiar with and enjoyed on work breaks from time to time. Rarely was I given this long to be able to read. I was almost tempted to break the rule and thank her for her rather thoughtful act, though I didn’t. I stuck to the rule.
The next couple of hours were uneventful. Elizabeth and I read through our magazines, occasionally looking up at each other to exchange glances and smiles. Within that time, she had attempted to get me to talk at least half a dozen more times. I almost gave in when she asked me if I wanted another magazine.
At a little past 1:30, I could hear a knock at the front entrance. Elizabeth and I both looked before she remarked
“Oh, that must be the nice cleaner man”
With a giggle before returning to her magazine. I walked over to the front doors and sure enough, there stood a man around his mid-thirties, sporting a blue janitor suit waiting patiently at the door. I unlocked the door and opened it. As he took a stride to enter, I remembered the most important detail from rule 4. I closed the door halfway and sternly commanded
“Wait”
The man looked up at me with a surprised look. I asked him the question.
“What is your name?”
The man stared back at me as an innocent smile formed on his face.
“I’m Simon!”
He announced excitedly.
“The Janitor here. Did James let you know I was coming tonight?”
I stood there for a moment, thinking over the rule, before nodding my head and opening the door once again to let him in.
Once inside, Simon walked with purpose to the janitor's closet which was positioned near the men’s restroom. I followed him somewhat suspiciously for the next few minutes as he began to clean but I eased up once I got the feeling that he was just the janitor around here and that James made up the whole “ask for his name thing” to make into one of his rules.
I returned to my counter in the terminal and continued to read. Occasionally, Simon would pass by, off to do his duties in some part of the airport or Elizabeth would stand up to look at the various pictures and paintings on display in the terminal. A good half an hour of this would go on before Simon approached the terminal counter with his mop in hand. He seemed to be eyeing up the two leather suitcases Elizabeth had set there.
Assuming he wanted to clean where they were, I got up to move them. I grabbed each one by the handle but failed to lift them off of the ground. Confused, I stepped back to see if they were stuck on something. They were not. Just two suitcases, left right where Elizabeth had set them.
I tried to lift just one. Again, I failed. I tried both hands, putting my back and legs into it with all that I had. It wouldn’t budge.
I looked back up at Simon who nodded his head in Elizabeth’s direction. I turned to look at Elizabeth, who after noticing my stare, and my apparent inability to move her luggage, smiled and stood up.
“Let me get that for you”
She insisted. With ease, she lifted both leather suitcases and moved them closer to her seat before lowering them, this time letting them drop a few inches. When they hit the ground, a boom echoed through the airport and I flinched in surprise. I looked back at Simon, who hadn’t seemed shocked at all. He just continued to mop.
I slowly made my way back to my seat, not taking an eye off Elizabeth for one second as I did. After a few minutes, she looked back up from her magazine, noticed my stare, and returned to her reading with a grin. She seemed to find my shock amusing. Eventually, Simon noticed my surprise as well. He paused his mopping and approached me before raising his head.
“I know, I know. Stick to the rules and everything will be just fine, trust me”
He stated quietly. I nodded my head in response.
Simon went back to his cleaning. A few minutes passed before Elizabeth had something new to say.
“What a remarkable aircraft!”
She exclaimed, looking out the glass panes facing the runways. I followed her gaze to the lone, black, and red airplane positioned on the runway. I turned around, looking at the picture displayed behind me. It certainly looked like a match. I turned back to the window and felt my heart sink. A silhouette of a person now stood next to the plane, facing the airport and the windows of the terminal.
“Stop looking at it”
Simon sternly muttered from behind me. I looked back at Simon who quickly cowered, seemingly ashamed to have raised his voice at me but I was grateful he had. I read over rule 5 again, specifically where it stated to not look at the plane twice. I murmured insults at myself under my breath but they didn’t have much room between my now heavy, frantic breathing. My eyes darted through the other rules. I chose to focus on that sheet of paper. At least it was something other to look at than the plane outside.
This went on for a good ten minutes or so and my breathing started to calm down. I had begun to pray in my head that whoever and whatever that was would go away when Elizabeth suddenly approached my counter. I snapped my head up in a jittery movement to make eye contact with her.
“I’m going to get some more reading material. Want another one of those?”
She asked, reaching a hand out to my National Geographic magazine. I looked up and nodded, forcing a smile. As She moved away, my gaze didn’t, and once again I found myself looking at the plane on the runway, the silhouette now standing hundreds of feet away from the plane, even closer to the building, and still staring in my direction.
Chills ran up my spine as I snapped my gaze back to my desk. I began to shake with fear and the manic breathing returned. Moments later, Elizabeth returned and placed a new magazine on the counter before running a hand over my shoulder, seemingly to comfort me. Simon then put his hand on my back.
“He’ll be gone soon and so will the plane. Just don’t look at it again”
He assured me.
“Mind if I clean here?”
He then asked.
I got up and walked to the end of the counter, watching Simon thoroughly clean the floor before I looked up and let out a soft
“Thank you”
He nodded and smiled back.
“What was that?”
Elizabeth asked. I turned towards her.
“Oh, I was just thanking Simon for-”
My error occurred to me before I could finish speaking. My eyes locked on Elizabeth as she stood up from her seat and her smile faded. Her eyes and nose began to bleed profusely as she started to sob, lightly at first, then hysterically. She let out a bellowing screech, a mix of pain and anger. She picked up one of her suitcases and hurled it at me, I barely dodged the ridiculously heavy object before it crashed into the wall behind me.
Luckily I was quick thinking this time and made a run for the men’s restroom recalling rule 3. She chased after me but I slammed the door shut in her face and locked it. Elizabeth pounded on the door with furious anger a few times but gave up quickly.
“So that’s how you dance, is it love? I can play that game”
She snickered before flipping a light switch outside of the bathroom. The clicking of her shoes faded away. A few minutes of silence passed before laughter started to become audible from the other side of the door.
One voice grew to two, two voices grew to three, three grew to ten. While others continued their now hysterical laughing, some began to scream. I crumbled to the floor, covering my ears as the voices went on, only stopped by another flip of the switch. Light beamed through the bottom of the door.
“It’s over now. She’s gone, and so is the plane. I’ve gotta be getting out of here soon”
Simon’s calm and friendly voice called out. I reluctantly exited the bathroom and followed him back to the counter, where he had prepared another coffee for me.
“Wish I could have done more there but you’ll come to find out that when Elizabeth gets angry, you just gotta let her do her thing”.
I looked up at him, still with my distraught face, at a loss for words. Over the next few minutes, Simon finished cleaning Elizabeth’s blood from the floor before putting everything back into the janitor's closet. He looked down at his watch.
“I better get out of here. Good luck with the rest of your night. I hope I’ll be seeing you soon”.
He said, letting out a sigh as he again looked at me in pity. I think he knew how shaken up I was. It was like he had seen people in my position before. Something told me he doesn’t have a choice on when he leaves. After I watched him exit the door, I returned to my seat behind the counter. I began to feel alone and afraid, but the loneliness wouldn’t last at least.
Only minutes after Simon left, the doors swung open and men in tactical gear, most of which had their faces covered in masks and goggles, rushed through the door. I sprung back up from my seat and watched as they did, with not much else I could do. They swept room to room, checking every nook and cranny at gunpoint, ignoring my existence at first.
As they cleared the entire building, the twenty or so armed men made their way to the terminal seating area. A lone man in a suit, whom I had not noticed enter, made his way to the front of the group.
“I’m with TSA, I’m going to need you to answer some questions for me”
He demanded. I nodded in affirmation.
“How many individuals have you seen in this airport since the security team left the building?”
“Besides myself, 2 Inside, one outside”
I answered confidently.
“Was the individual outside next to a black and red Cessna Skyhawk?”
“Yes”
I again responded confidently. The man in the suit nodded and paused for a moment before making another demand.
“We’re going to need to search the air bridge”.
I glanced back at the sheet of rules on the counter. Making sure I had read it right before. I took a step forward and straightened my uniform.
“No”
I replied. The man in the suit looked irritated.
“If you do not step aside and give us permission to search, I’m afraid I’ll have to detain you”.
Already tired and worn out, I wasn’t going to break the last rule. I decided to give a not-so-smart remark to the man in the suit
“Looking a little well-armed for TSA, wouldn’t you agree?”
He ignored my comment.
“Last chance, step aside”
“No”
Again, irritated by my response, the man in the suit turned to his right and raised his chin to give a signal. Gunshots rang out and I collapsed to the floor. I felt as though my life left my body before it all faded to black.
The next thing I remembered was the feeling of my hand gripping a water bottle. Then came James’s voice.
“I see you made it through the first night intact. Looks like you got to meet Simon. He’s a nice guy, you’ll get to like him. And Elizabeth, she’s…well, she’s something else, isn’t she?”
I opened my eyes and looked up at James.
“Am I dead?”
I asked in a raspy voice. James chuckled in return.
“No! No, you did great. You’re fine. It does, however, look like you might have been a little assertive to our undead TSA special forces wannabes. I would recommend sticking with the less aggressive tone and word choices, maybe I ought to edit that into the rules sheet… In any case, they can’t hurt you but they can still get a jump out of you, as you saw”.
Once again, I was at a loss for words. I slowly made my way back to my feet from the ground and looked at the sunrise over the airfield. James held out an envelope for me. I opened it, revealing a stack of crisp $100 bills.
“A little bonus for your first night. It sure is a lot to go through for the first time but I promise, you get used to it all”.
I turned to James with an angry look and finally spoke up.
“What the hell is wrong with you? What makes you think it’s okay to put someone through this without any warning? I'm done, keep your damn money. I’m gonna go call the cops”.
I started to walk towards the exit when James stepped in front of me.
“Look, I know it isn’t fair for you but it wasn’t fair for me either. It wasn’t fair for any of us. It’s not okay, I know. But what do you expect me to do? Someone needs to be here for the night shift. You wouldn’t believe any of this if I told you ahead of time. You would have thought I was some sort of nutjob and the police will think of you the same if you tell them. I needed you to see it for yourself”
James was starting to get worked up and stoppeto breatheth before continuing.
“This money is yours, no strings attached. You’re free to leave now and never come back, there will be no shame in it”
I also started to calm down but I couldn’t bring myself to look James in the eye yet.
“If you choose to stay, I’ll see you in my office to finish up your paperwork”.
And with that, James walked away. Facing the front of the airport, I watched the first passengers of the day come through the entrance. I just stood there for a few minutes. Whether I was ready for this job or not, I knew right then I sure as hell wasn’t going back to another overcrowded city airport.
I turned and headed for James’s office.

This updates dFPS to add hitch detection code similar to FPS++, along with some game-speed smoothing to help with jittery animations, such as when gliding.
Been beta testing this on my user page with a bunch of users, and after ~8 beta versions it looks like it should be smooth enough for release :) Many thanks to everyone that helped test!
This should be a big improvement over the previous 1.5.1 version, if you try it out please let me know how it compares with other dynamic FPS releases!
This also includes another fix for the increased camera sensitivity when talking to people, so camera speed should remain the same as 30FPS across different framerates. (It seems game splits certain kinds of conversations into different functions though, this updates two kinds to use proper speed which fixes most of them, but it's likely there's still more to find. If you notice any other camera speed issues in the game please let me know.)
Note: dFPS won't change the games framelimit by itself! It's best used with either Yuzu "Limit speed percent" increased in general Yuzu settings, or a static 60FPS+ mod enabled - alternately you can still use it with vanilla 30FPS too, should still help fix slowdown issues if you dip below it.
DynamicFPSv1.5.2release.zip: https://pixeldrain.comM4fRDZrP
Compatible with all game versions, to set it up just extract DynamicFPSv1.5.2 folder into your games mod directory (in Yuzu: right click game in game list -> Open Mod Data Location)
If anyone would like to support my work I have a ko-fi page at https://ko-fi.com/ChucksFeedAndSeed :)
Changes in v1.5.2:

• added hitch detection similar to FPS++ (thanks to SomeRandomPeople)
• added game-speed smoothing, helps with jittery gliding animations, likely other animations too
• added camera sensitivity fixes when in conversations, sensitivity should now remain the same as 30FPS across all framerates
• extended conversation fix to innkeeper conversations too (likely other kinds still need sensitivity fixes too, let me know if you find any)
• changed max framerate limit from 288FPS to 145FPS, appears to help with shrine out-of-bounds glitches when using limiter disabled
• minor fix to framelimiter code, might help make 30FPS video playback smoother
• code reorganization, very minor tweaks (will try and setup a repo for it soon)

Changes in v1.5:

• (v1.5.1) Fixed the ultrahand patch below also affecting bow/camera aiming, will now patch the ultrahand-related code directly instead.
  
• Ultrahand vertical rotation speed should now be consistent across framerates (many thanks to igoticecream for finding the code related to it)
  
• Cutscene speed should now be fixed, framerate will be limited to the video framerate during cutscenes, should work both with & without vsync enabled
  
• Game-speed/delta-time code adjusted, using slightly different method to work it out, appears to have far less teleportation/microstuttering for me now.
  
• Added 288FPS max-framerate-cap to game, should prevent game from needing to deal with extremely fast deltatimes, helping improve stability when running with Yuzu limiter disabled.
  
• Added support for v1.1.2 update
  

Known dFPS / 60FPS+ issues:

• Menu speed will increase at higher FPS, making it hard to navigate at very high framerates, will start looking into this more soon
  
• External framelimiters like RTSS/control panel seem to cause random game speed hiccups, will try looking into this more, but for now I recommend disabling external limiters and just use Yuzu limiter / static FPS mods.
  
• Certain parts of shrines might fail to operate at higher FPS (eg. gears not turning), or might operate too fast (light illuminating puzzles) - gears inside Turakamik and Soryotanog shrines are known to be affected, failing to turn at higher FPS, can usually be helped by temporarily changing emulator speed limit. (would like to try and compile a list of all shrines that have issues, if you notice any shrines that become broken above 30FPS please let me know - by broken I mean the shrine either can't be completed normally or a chest can't be reached - if it's just something minor like physics acting strange we probably don't need to worry about it too much)
  
• Trampoline objects may act erratic at increased FPS.
  
• Ladder-climbing animation might become misaligned at increased FPS, causing Link to fall once reaching the top (spam jump button to get around it) - might only be an issue when playing with limiter disabled.
  
• Ryujinx will disable PPTC when using this mod, there's a tracking issue about this at https://github.com/Ryujinx/Ryujinx/issues/5130
  
• When teleporting into depths the teleport particle effects might stuttejitter, this might be an emu bug (seems Yuzu has some graphics issues when teleporting to depths even without dFPS, likely the cause of these particle issues too)
  
• The fix to limit framerate during the 30FPS cutscene videos isn't compatible with the interpolated 60FPS cutscenes mod, and will make them run slow as they're marked as 30FPS in the video metadata/headers: search "PixelKiri 60FPS cutscenes - dynamic FPS fix" for a header update tool that can fix them.
  

Known non-issues/fixed issues:

• Not really dFPS related, but the strange flickering where lines/wireframes appear in textures for a frame or two can be fixed with the "disable quality reduction" / "disable LOD quality reduction" patch, a port for 1.1.2 can be found in my patchset here: https://www.reddit.com/useChucksFeedAndSeed/comments/13sofgg/totk_v112_visual_patches_chuckpatch_fsr_disable/
  
• Timers/bloodmoon/etc should work at correct time even with changed/unlocked Yuzu speed limiter, timer issues were only a thing in the very first dynamic FPS pchtxt version. (changing Yuzu limiter may have an effect on savegame timestamps though, but seems to be an emu issue with wrong time being provided to game, not anything dFPS could change afaik - for me timestamps have been fine with limiter unlocked, maybe off by a minute or two, but seems that happens even without dFPS)
  

Thanks:

• SomeRandomPeople for the hitch detection method
• igoticecream for finding ultrahand sensitivity code (which also helped locate conversation sensitivity code too)
• Everyone that helped test beta versions on my user page!