My friend subtly referenced the “gay agenda” in her Facebook post
It was a post that reds “A helpful loving view on the current agendas and boycotting, and more importantly a charge to pray specifically for our nation. 🇺🇸” With a linked YT vid:
https://youtu.be/hid1v7zb000
This vid references “the lifestyle” gayness as a “choice” “choosing” this and that. The language in the vid didn’t pass the vibe check.
There seems to be undertones of homophobia when people use the word “agenda” and thinking that LGBTQ+ people have agenda to get or convert kids. There’s no agenda at all!
I’m so confused because she’s a very sweet person and I really enjoy her friendship but this makes me question our friendship. She is a mom and much older than I. She’s also heavy on her faith too. I really need a third party perspective on this.

My girlfriend and I worked on this post together all day the other day and after posting it here she was looking forward to the feedback/discussion that might stem from it. She has been isolated with this for her entire life and so this is the first time it is going out in “public” but shortly after posting the entire account was shadowbanned. I am hoping by posting again her story won’t be silenced. I think it’s disgusting anyone would try to silence her story for any reason, especially here.

This story is about my girlfriend and I have her permission to post this here, she helped me write it, as we have talked about this and not only does she want to hear the responses but I am also curious considering all of this remained between us until now.
My girlfriend of several years was molested by her Dad and her Mom growing up. It started before she can even remember and went on until she left for college, where we met her sophomore year.
According to her, her mother and father were always very kind, sweet, affectionate, never violent, never cruel, and treated their sexual time together as basically just another aspect of being a family.
She knew that she couldn’t tell anyone because according to them “not everyone loves their children the same way we love you and people don’t understand” along with more explanation but you get the point.
So she kind of had this dual life where she would go to school and extracurricular stuff as she got older but no one knew about any of it. She never told anyone out of fear they wouldn’t understand or her parents would get into trouble.
After we met and things got serious she disclosed it to me at a point she was comfortable and has told me repeatedly that it was the best thing that ever happened to her. She said it made her closer to her parents, taught her about sex and intimacy with people who will always love her, set a high bar for all future sexual/romantic relationships, and as much as it shocked me to hear the details of how she was raised (because a LOT happened early on) the most shocking part to me is how she sees all of it as a positive, and the more I hear her out the more it makes sense.
Now I’m feeling conflicted because it goes against everything I have been taught and told about it. She even referenced a meta study done that heavily disputed the connection between CSA and trauma.
All of this to say, how normal is this for people? Is she some rare case where Al though what happened was obviously bad due to moral/ethical reasons, it was “good” for her?
I’ve met her parents and they are the nicest and most friendly people. I grew up in a very sex-negative house where I was basically told masturbation was something the devil made you do, so our childhoods are basically polar opposites.
Anyways I hope the community can provide some feedback because she has been struggling with feeling isolated with these feelings for years. She doesn’t want to see a therapist because she thinks they will just gaslight her into feeling bad about something that in her mind has only benefited her. But it has taken a toll on her feeling this way and not being able to relate to anyone or talk about it outside of her family.
I will end by saying both of us acknowledge for a lot of people it’s obviously an easily “that is horrific” case where there is violence, force, coercion, fear, blackmail, etc. She wanted me to be clear, as do I, that in no way is this implying that it’s somehow okay or that other people’s trauma isn’t valid.

Hi! New dog mom here. I have a 6mo pit mix who has been a dream so far (training has been easy, loves other dogs, loves his crate). He has been R+ trained (just his basics) and is a dream on the leash. He has had two negative interactions with people running up from behind us on walks and being obnoxiously loud to say hi but otherwise nothing.
The only problem is that he's showing signs of fear-based stranger reactivity. He has been heavily socialized (letting people give him treats while out and about, meeting new family members in and outside the home, ignoring people on walks) but about a month and a half ago, he started freaking out when people pay attention to him (except for household members).
Nothing has changed in his routine and I know he's starting to reach his second fear period/adolescence but I'm not sure how to approach this. He bark-yells when people acknowledge him (specifically try to pet him or give him a treat, although sometimes he freaks if they talk to him).
I did order a nervous dog leash and leash flag so people stop sticking their hands in his face without permission, and I am planning on increasing the amount of little socialization we do (ie, sitting in parking lots or at the park) but is there anything else I should be doing?
As I said, this is my first dog so I just want to make sure I'm doing right by him. Any and all advice is appreciated!

I can't explain what i feel listening to her songs. Every song i listen i just want to sing loud and cry my heart out . Last night i jammed to her songs it felt like i was going from a loving healthy relationship to a bad breakup. I sang loud and cried like a baby . She feels like some therapist her songs touch my SOUL and her beauty is just chefs kiss.

So, I was diagnosed with this nearly a decade ago. I was in a high profile job and had my admin call the ambulance when I had my first attack. I had no idea what was happening to me, but after arriving at the hospital, I learned it was vertigo. After being treated, I cautiously drove myself home many hours lately wondering why they let me drive because I still wasn’t right. Saw an ENT later who diagnosed me with MD. Also, saw the Dizzy Dr. Timothy Hain in Chicago. I’m starting to learn he was one of the the best, now retired. He clued me into the fact that many with MD also have migraines and suggested I get the book Heal your Headache by David Bucholtz. I was nearly episode free for 8+ years watching my diet. Then moved to 5500’ altitude, and it’s back. Cut out more foods. Better for 18 months. Cut out even more foods, better. All I can figure is it’s disease progression. Ginger root is a big help. Ginkgo Biloba seems to help. Also trying pycnogenol. Most important, a migraine prevention smoothie every morning seems to help…3 c spinach, handful of kale, Granny Smith apple, 1” ginger root (key ingredient), 2 tablespoons of chia seeds and milk has done wonders. Hope this helps.

Our dog Teddy is 12, a healthy, fit and happy cavoodle who everyone mistakes as a puppy because he looks and acts so young. However 2 days ago teddy became very frail and sick out of the blue, and over 2 vet visits over the next day, we were informed he had aggressive cancer that had spread to his kidney and in one of his legs but also had a mass in his spleen. After being told this doctors suggested getting him euthanised in the next 3-5 days which is fine even though it was very hard for mum and I. The problem is that my dad is currently overseas taking care of a hefty amount of family business and will be back in 10 days. He has so much to take care of that he can’t cut his trip short but don’t get me wrong he loves teddy with all his heart. He says that if teddy is in any suffering then he wants to us to euthanise teddy as soon as possible as he loves the dog too dearly to know that he’s dealing harm to the dog. My mum told the nurses our dilemma and they believe it’s possible to keep our dog out of harm for the next 10 days, giving us medicine that keeps pain away and slows down internal bleeding from the mass. Currently there’s 9 days until he’s back, teddy has been the same since he fell ill, barely eating and spending most of the day resting but would wag his tail when he sees one of us and bark at when the dog loving neighbour stopped by to greet him, once again he is in no pain.
I want my dad to see the dog of with us as he didn’t get to see his mother off last year, and also so teddy is accompanied by all of us before he enters his next life because that dog loved my father. I’m asking for advice to know what state my dog would have to be in to cut things early and let him pass before dad gets back. Which is okay because we will have dad on facetime but teddy would only be hearing his voice and will probably be a little confused. Thanks ( :

I'm so fucking done with everything. These last few weeks I've been so anxious and sad and i don't think my meds are working, this guy im talking to has been distant since I've gotten my haircut and idk why and now my two best friends are dating and I'm happy for them don't get me wrong but I'm so jealous because I'm fucking in love with one of them and I'm so upset about it and these last two days I've been crying so much and idk why and I'm so pissed off at everyone and i am anxious about my orientation because I haven't even done that yet and I am pissed off at so many different people and I'm overwhelmed about so many other things. AND I AM SO FUCKING LONELY ALL THE TIME AND I WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP SO BAD BUT NO ONE FUCKING LIKES ME i thought this guy im talking to did but after i sent him nudes hes been so distant and i feel so helpless because i want to be in a relationship because i want someone to care about me as much as i will care about someone else but noo and whenever someone gives me the SMALLEST amount of attention i get attached because i think it means they like me but NO IM JUST FUCKING AUTISTIC LIKE THAT AND I HAVE SO MUCH TRAUMA AND IM IN FUCKING THERAPY AND NO ONE KNOWS WHAT IM GOING THROUGH BECAUSE I DONT KNOW HOW TO EXPRESS MY EMOTIONS AND IM MAD AT EVERYONE
thank you for coming to my ted talk

Hi! New dog mom here. I have a 6mo pit mix who has been a dream so far (training has been easy, loves other dogs, loves his crate). He has been R+ trained (just his basics) and is a dream on the leash. He has had two negative interactions with people running up from behind us on walks and being obnoxiously loud to say hi but otherwise nothing.
The only problem is that he's showing signs of fear-based stranger reactivity. He has been heavily socialized (letting people give him treats while out and about, meeting new family members in and outside the home, ignoring people on walks) but about a month and a half ago, he started freaking out when people pay attention to him (except for household members).
Nothing has changed in his routine and I know he's starting to reach his second fear period/adolescence but I'm not sure how to approach this. He bark-yells when people acknowledge him (specifically try to pet him or give him a treat, although sometimes he freaks if they talk to him).
I did order a nervous dog leash and leash flag so people stop sticking their hands in his face without permission, and I am planning on increasing the amount of little socialization we do (ie, sitting in parking lots or at the park) but is there anything else I should be doing?
As I said, this is my first dog so I just want to make sure I'm doing right by him. Any and all advice is appreciated!

Wanted to spark a discussion about what you all think about the progression of these categories in each game. I’ve played Until Dawn and The Quarry, now playing Little Hope. About Until Dawn, I loved the way the game was designed and had pretty good graphics and it’s about the same tier as TQ for me (no criticism, except for some bugs with The Quarry). I don’t know if UD/TQ are “separate” from the anthology, but with Until Dawn having come out in 2015, and MoM coming out in 2019, there was a significant drop in the quality and graphics from my pov, and I don’t see myself playing MoM in the near future. Little Hope is okay so far, but some of the characters’ movements just seem stiff, I don’t like the way that it’s wide screen, subtitles are in a weird spot, and it’s Times New Roman which I don’t really like (personal preference). When I finish LH, I’ll move on to House of Ashes and The Devil In Me, but I want to hear you all’s inputs about this side of things.

Hi all,
I know college rankings in general are often misleading and not always even helpful in determining what college to pick, but I was recently looking at the methodology Niche uses to calculate the "Academics" score. Im choose to highlight this specific ranking as the academics score is worth 40% of their total ranking, and many prospective students would base their collegiate choices off of primarily the quality of the academics.
The biggest issues (in my opinion, this is just my opinion) with the methodology are the factors chosen and how they are rated
The most weighted factor for calculating the academics score is... acceptance rate, at 16.9%
It is true that more competitive schools tend to have better academics, however, as many of us know, acceptance rate can be artificially decreased through interesting admissions policies (cough Northeastern cough cough Minerva cough), and a just because a school has a higher acceptance rate doesn't mean its academics are worse (some argue that many STEM focused schools actually have higher acceptance rates despite being competitive as many students interested in such schools tend to be more qualified and not just applying for clout). Furthermore, basing rankings off admissions scores could potentially create a positive feedback loop: relatively low acceptance rate leads to relatively high ranking, more students apply, acceptance rate goes down, ranking goes up, more students apply, until it eventually evens out.
Additionally at 8.4% wighting we have yield rate, which is not necessarily a indicator of good academics.
SAT scores and National Merit Scholar students account for 12.8% of the academics grade, and while, yes, smarter students tend to go to schools with better academics, I would still argue that standardized test scores are not going to determine how good a schools professors and coursework are going to be.
At, also 8.4% we have diversity, and while I wholeheartedly believe that diversity is very important, does diversity impact the quality of academics and professors? Probably, but it just seems odd that they threw it in, id love to hear y'alls thoughts on the matter, I definitely don't have the full picture on this one.
This is all my opinion and I just wanted to share it. I do at least appreciate that Niche wights its Value ranking fairly high at 27.5% of the total ranking, which considers factors such as return on investment, net price, median earnings and loan stats, although lots of students that go to your typical highly ranking private schools like the ivys tend to have more wealthy parents which also comes with better networking opportunities not even considering college. Personally, Id like a college ranking site that only puts up raw data which you could then download as an xls file, sorta like the world bank (https://data.worldbank.org).
I would love to hear what y'all think!
​
Here's niches official college academics ranking methodology: https://www.niche.com/about/methodology/best-college-academics/

I’m gonna try to keep this short, but I have so many thoughts.
I grew up in a dysfunctional family. My mom was the “more” abusive one, but my dad was abusive too. Dad ended up getting full custody after their divorce as he was the breadwinner and my mom had more severe and obvious mental health issues. Long story short I was encouraged to hate my mom my entire life by my dad and kind of did? But as an adult looking back, starting to hate my dad actually. Haven’t spoken to him in 6+ months and not sure I ever want to speak to him again- Looking to this sub for thoughts/advice.
Mom abuse highlights- Would tell me I was a bad kid and bad sister to my brother (ages 6-11ish), spanked my brother and I with a wooden board that had holes drilled in it for “aerodynamics” and a face drawn on it names “the boss” (my dad witnessed and I guess condoned this), hit me and kicked me, on one occasion appx 11 years old I remember laying on the ground in a ball trying to protect myself while she kicked me, spit in my face, etc etc you get the idea. She would also frequently tote us kids around while high and sometimes even to her “friends” houses to get more drugs. She was also severely schizophrenic at times and delusional, which lead to a lot of issues. Ultimately she lost her limited custody with us when I was 12. I haven’t seen her since I was 14. She’s probably dead tbh.
Dad abuse highlights- Beat the living shit out of me with a belt when I was around 6 years old. Whipped me so hard that the backs of my legs were covered in welts and I cried so hard for hours that I hyperventilated. Told me my mom wanted him to be more of a disciplinarian as an explanation/“apology” (this was during their divorce). When I was 8/9 decided my room was too messy and it was unacceptable - Shoved my 4” bookcase over in a fit of rage- Dumping its contents on the floor and shattering some ceramic/glass items- Left me to clean it up. Ages 8-10, would leave my younger brother and I unsupervised with a creepy neighbor who 100% would let his dick hang out of his pants for us to see. We are VERY lucky nothing worse happened. In highschool, started dating questionable girlfriends and treated me poorly. I barely remember details because I was probably preoccupied with highschool, but I remember him being generally shitty to me. In college, continued to be shitty. Cut me off financially, but continued to claim me as dependent. Would do family trips near my college town with the whole fam except me (I would find out later they had been in my area and didn’t let me know). Fast forward- Found myself an abusive husband (🙄). My dad met him 2-3 times? One of those times I was opening up a christmas present with a pocket knife and abusive husband forcibly ripped it out of my hands against my will so I wouldn’t “hurt myself.” Dad witnessed it, didn’t ever mention it or ask if I was okay. My dad decided abusive husband was in charge of me and would then text him things about me instead of speaking to me directly. When I confronted him about it “why are you texting him when you don’t even know him? he’s not in charge of me. text me… your daughter…” he absolutely LOST IT. Literally screamed at me, called me a bitch, terrible daughter, he’s so lucky to have my brother because I’m so worthless, etc etc. Immediately after that phone call, I texted him and told him I would absolutely not be spoken to like that or treated that way and that was the end of our relationship. We were out of contact for a few months and then he texted me out of the blue one day like nothing had ever happened.
After that… It’s been about 6-7 years of a “normal-ish” relationship where I force myself to go home for holidays and cosplay normal family. I have literally been forcing myself to do it because “it’s the only family I have.” We also would occasionally text or talk on the phone.
I divorced abusive husband after 2 years (go me, finally a win), took a few years off from serious dating while I went to therapy (another win), and have now been in a new, happy, healthy relationship with a supportive and lovely partner for years (the ultimate win, god I hope it’s forever).
Which brings me to… Christmas 2022 I did the old “have to do this” and went to my hometown for a day with my boyfriend to do Christmas at my dads. I was so uncomfortable I wanted to crawl out of my skin. I literally felt repulsed being at my old house. It felt so unnatural and wrong. He has photos of my brother and I plastered everywhere and in so many of them we look dead eyed and miserable because we were surviving abuse… We both have CPTSD symptoms that can show up as ADHD, etc.
So… I find myself thinking “but there are good memories too” “he took you on trips” whatever. But I honestly don’t think I want relationship with him. I’ve been so happy for the last 6 months not talking to him. I’m also doing EMDR soon and hope it helps with this.
Any thoughts/advice appreciated ❤️.

the bittersweet mix of sadness and relief when scars can be mistaken for stretch marks
the absolute pure pain that overcomes you when you realize you have totally and completely lost in the way you feared you would
the sadness and dryness and puffiness and complete dread and exhaustion after you’ve cried as if someone tore your heart out
no one talks about the aftermath of depression and self harm. no one talks about the silent glances between you and your former weapon of choice. the very weapon you used on yourself. for not being good enough. for not being strong enough. for not being able to control. for not being able to fear.
all i want is my mom. all i want is my dad. instead i have pain. and feelings of regret. and feelings of failure. and feelings of giving up hope.
when the anniversary comes around and for some twisted comfort you run ur fingers along the grooves in ur skin. the grooves that would’ve been foreign to you a year ago.
the words try creeping out of my teeth as the letters, words, and phrases dance in my head, but anger burns in my mouth barely letting me breath let alone speak. again. the words are pushed down and only tears are shared. only a scowl. the anger only showing through the shaking of my body. and yet again. the true weight of my feelings overlooked.
somehow someway, there’s a weight on me here. sometimes on my shoulders. sometimes pushing on my chest. sometimes giving me a headache as i struggle to find the logic. and sometimes numbing my heart. all aching me to leave. to throw the white flag. to call it quits. decide this isn’t my battle. but the one i so often cannot let go. let myself lose. but if i continue, will i ever know peace? know true and honest unconditional love? live the life I was meant to have and not the one I think THEY want? how do i come out of this whole again? how do i come out of this me again? how do i come out of this without hating myself and without more scares than i even have now? how do i forgive? how do i let go? how do i stop fighting? stop protecting?
the early morning or late night feeling sitting in your room, in your pajamas, dried tears, wrapped in blankets and trembling. the silence of all of you being zoned out before someone says something. something so deep and cringey and dramatic that would never be said in any other circumstance, but hits so close to home everyone takes a minute. these moments when you feel so close to ur siblings yet so far from ur parents and even the world. still contemplating if you’re the problem. if there even is a problem. and in this moment, the only thing you long for is peace. is waking up with the sun and hearing the birds, is being a little kid and dancing with mom in the kitchen, all you want is to lay in the sun with your brother with no worries. all you want is for someone to tell you it’ll all work out and be ok. all you want is for them to come to their senses and just listen. just give u a hug. just be there for you. but you tighten the blanket around yourself. you rub your eyes. wipe a tear away. look at ur younger brother. think about your younger siblings. and remember that u don’t get those things. you are those things for the little ones. and for a moment that brings you peace but immediately following that moment is unworldly pain. what did you do wrong?
not being listened to. what does it feel like? i don’t even know how to describe it properly. it’s an awful. hopeless feeling. since i was little, everytime i was sick, i would have a dream. this dream was only of muffled screaming. screaming that i can’t get to. or can’t get anyone to get to. and it’s terrifying. all i want is to help. it would wake me up almost immediately. too soon for me to know if it was someone else’s screams or my own. but recently theyve been my own. i’ve been sick. not in the fever way. sick in the mind way. and i’ve been screaming. And no one can hear me. or if they can, they don’t care. and it’s hopeless. all i want is to be helped.
i hear a lot of times, in media and in everyday life, that people wish they could shut their mouths, that blowing up and saying too much gets them in trouble too often. i wish that could be me. and it’s not that i wish i would get in trouble more, i don’t care for trouble, but not saying what you’re thinking and feeling is a terrible feeling. the feeling that ur thoughts are useless. the feeling that no one wants to hear what u have to say so u just shut up and don’t say a thing. not for lack of words. but lack of courage.

If you see my last post about the Palkia/Dialga tin I got from Walmart, these are the best pulls from it. Not a whole lot of value but I really love the look of the cards

32M active, decently fit, no major health issues, 2x vaxxed, never had covid until this week.
I’m generally a healthy person, and i haven’t been this sick in a long time so maybe I’m biased here…. but this virus feels so damn strange. I have had a few flus over the years, but the symptoms that I’m getting are so up and down compared to those and it really doesn’t feel like any other illness I’ve had. My aches suddenly turn off on and on, it will feel like I’m turning the corner one day, and the next day I’m worse. I’m on day 7, and my symptoms might feel better hour to hour, but I honestly haven’t noticed any long-term improvement since I woke up with a sore throat last sat.
This virus, which I thought was a cold until a couple days ago is just sticking around with me in a scary way, and I really empathize with those who have it worse than I do.
I was never of the opinion that a virus like this could be created in a lab, and I know this sounds ridiculous, but it almost feels like a much worse “synthetic flu”. Even if it isn’t manmade, this shit does not feel normal…. I really hope we can make scientific progress to prevent new viruses like this from appearing in the future.
Hope you all and your loved ones make progress and feel better, seriously fuck this virus.

Well im 18 and took .75 g of penis envy mushrooms I grew with my close friend and brother. It was the best experience ever I regularly smoke weed and have tried acid once and had a not too favorable time but this shroom trip was straight vibes. Pink Floyd , Led Zeppelin and jimi I usually listen to tool a lot smoking weed but it was a little to intense at the time.
My good friend took double the dose me and my brother did, which was .75 but he is seasoned with psychedelics. Sadly we couldn’t share the experience with him right before we peaked he had to leave to watch his little bro.
But me and my brother ended up peaking outside I felt like I was being birthed out of mother earths vagina. I was laying under a dogwood tree and it felt like I was praying to an elephants foot. Color was very enhanced and saturated, I felt super connected to the earth. It was supposed to rain today but the skies cleared up perfectly when we took them. me and my brother just laid in the sun on towels and straight up melted into the earth. No better felling we felt fucking amazing. For some reason i thought My skin looked like elephant skin
Then our grandmother came over and we came down, we ate some watermelon and came back to reality .
Well what I realized is I love elephants and need to travel to Africa one day to see one.
All around a great experience, I felt like it was the perfect dose. I respected the mushroom and researched alot so it took care of me. Definitely not going to do it often. Once every few months if that

Ranking most embarrassing things that have happened in Mexico so far: 1. Accidentally reserving a love hotel. You park directly under your one room and they pull a curtain over it, and it didn't have a sign about the wifi but it did come with a condom 2. Times people tried to hold a conversation with me late at night when I was too tired to speak Spanish properly 3. Realizing I hadn't taken any photos of what town looked like so I just started randomly taking photos of residential streets 4. Time I forgot I ordered an appetizer so I thought it was a very extravagant complementary dish and made a weird face in reaction to that false reality 5. Time our group tour had to split up so we did like a 3 hour tour with just me, my husband, and José

Hei!
I need to have a gynaecologist examination, and before I start calling around my local clinics I wondered if anyone knows an approximate cost for a gynaecological examination at a private doctoclinic, and whether there is much difference in price between clinics. I've been looking around online but not all of them list prices or details, so I thought I'd ask here!
I'm also wondering what exactly is included in the examination - I've never been to a gynaecologist before so I'm a little nervous and would love to hear some experiences!
Also, am I allowed to have someone with me in the examination for support?
Tusen takk :)