I was doing some Yellowjackets reading (articles, Reddit posts, etc.) and I got to thinking about the well-discussed idea of there being a secret bunke shelter that either dead cabin guy or someone else left. People speculate it as the place Javi has been hiding/is stuck, just another option for shelter, or a bunker full of supplies (or all 3). But then I got to thinking, if it is a bunker full of supplies or something of the sort, do you think there could be a secret tunnel under the cabin leading to it? Maybe this secret bunker of supplies has more than one entrance, once being in (or by) the cabin for those winter months when venturing out in the snow is dangerous and deadly. I think if someone was able to build a shelter, they could have possibly made more than one entrance, just in case one collapses or just one entrance is too far for an emergency.
It could be the secret/extra entrance is under the cabin or maybe under the shed? Maybe well hidden and not obvious so the wilderness gang hasn’t found it yet? I’m about to fall asleep so excuse the random bedtime thoughts I’m having if they are too far fetched haha.

This tournament sure was...something. In the 14 years that I have followed the NCAA Tournament I have never seen it get this crazy before. This was a complete 180 from last year's Tournament, where we only had Blue Bloods in the Final Four, and a blue blood champion. This year, it is not the case. We have CHAOS.
Now, let us take a look at the failures, and boy do I have a few words for some teams here...
Arizona Wildcats - For the third year in a row, we have a 15 over 2 upset in the opening round. And Arizona was offered up as this year's sacrifice. To be fair, this isn't as big of an upset compared to other 15-over-2 upsets. Believe it or not, I actually saw this coming. The moment Princeton was announced as the opponent, I knew Arizona was gonna go down early. The Tigers just outplayed them and held strong throughout the entire game. Just like in 1996, when they upset defending national champion UCLA in the first round, the Tigers' next upset would unsurprisingly come against a Pac-12 team. Man, 15-over-2 upsets are becoming a staple in March Madness now...future 2 seeds better watch out...
Virginia Cavaliers - This was yet another upset most saw coming, but my god...I'm still stunned by this. Virginia was even leading for most of the game, but then they just imploded near the end. That turnover...what the hell was that?
I swear, Virginia must have sold it's soul for a National Title back in 2019...
Iowa State Cyclones - I swear, the Cyclones are like destined to bow out early in the tournament. It's as if its required by law for them to fall early no matter how high expectations are for them. It wasn't even a contest, the Panthers just straight up slaughtered them. Iowa State is one of the next contestants for my next Legacy of Failure script. But only IF they meet certain conditions...
At least the Cyclones lost to an 11 seed, and 11 seeds at least have moderate success in the tournament.
At least they're not these sorry sacks:
Purdue's Boiler Explosion - What the fuck. What. The fuck. WHAT. THE. FUCK. WAS. THAT. Don't get me wrong, I knew you weren't going to make the Final Four this year. I knew you were going to choke. But as a #1 SEED IN THE FIRST ROUND?! When you were favored by TWENTY FOUR TO WIN?!! Do you realize what you have just done?! This is quite possibly the greatest failure in the history of college sports! This was your ALL-IN year, and you fall to a double digit seed for the third year in a row? Absolutely unacceptable. Matt Painter is on a SEARING hot seat now.
One word, Purdue: NUKE. Blow it up. You aren't winning with Painter. You aren't winning with this coaching staff. You aren't winning this core, and you aren't winning with these mentally fragile players who can't handle a shred of adversity.
Tick, tick, Painter and Lusk. It's time for a house cleaning in West Lafayette. Fucking Purdue... YOU BLEW IT!!!
Memphis Tigers - Penny Hardaway is getting Memphis on the right track. They won the AAC Tournament title over Houston, securing their second straight appearance in the Big Dance. But unfortunately, the Cinderella bug hit them, and it came in the form of Florida Atlantic, who won their first tournament game in school history. Memphis is still an interesting team nonetheless, and I'm eager to see how far Hardaway can take this team in the future.
Iowa Hawkeyes - Congratulations! Your team STILL can't make it past the first weekend of the tournament! This time you get rekt by Auburn. Fran McCaffrey continues to show that he cannot survive come March Madness despite his regular season successes. Iowa, if I were you I would find a new coach already. Fran is not the man.
Texas A&M Aggies - The Aggies had a solid regular season. They came close to winning the SEC Tournament title but got decimated by Alabama. Is this football or basketball I'm covering here? I'm confused. Anyway, it really seemed as if the Aggies had it in them to go on a reasonable run as they were a 7 seed, but then they went to Des Moines and got blown the fuck out by a team that hadn't won a tournament game in 22 years. The failure is always bigger in Texas...
USC Trojans - Despite losing the other Mobley brother to the draft last offseason, the Trojans still snuck their way into the Big Dance yet again. Unfortunately, Tom Izzo's Spartans killed any hopes they had of a deep run. The Trojans failed to conquer Sparta, and it's time for me to break out this scene from 300 again...
Providence Friars - After making the Sweet 16 last year, the Friars had another good team this season and were ranked for most of the latter half of the season. But unfortunately, Kentucky remembered last year's upset at the hands of Saint Peter's and decided to kill any hopes the Friars had of a deep run.
Baylor Bears - Once again, Baylor fails to make it past the second round. Despite maintaining most of the 2021 National Championship roster the Bears still cannot find it in themselves to get past the first weekend again. It wasn't even a contest, Creighton flat out controlled the tempo for the entire game. 2021 had better not have been a fluke for your guys...
Fairleigh Dickinson Knights - Congrats, FDU! You became the 2nd #16 seed to be a #1! Your consolation prize is blowing a late lead to Florida Atlantic in round two. Eh, who cares. You still pulled off the upset. The fact that this only happened 5 years after UMBC's stunning upset over Virginia is the most shocking fact about this too. Now, no #1 seed is safe. We are entering a period in the tournament where even the lowest seeds are now potential contenders. It'll be interesting to see how 2024's tournament goes...
Saint Mary's Gaels - Ah, it's that other WCC team. Congrats on winning another tournament game! Your prize is to get absolutely slaughtered by UConn. Great...
Penn State Nittany Lions - Congrats, Penn State! You won your first tournament game in 22 years! Even though you took the Longhorns to the limit, a big run just wasn't in the cards for you this year. Can we grant another tournament win to Penn State and put them in the Sweet 16 instead of Texas? They deserve it a lot more than Purdue...
Pittsburgh Panthers - Congrats, Pitt! You returned to the NCAA Tournament for the first time in 7 years! You even won a tournament game too! Though all good things must come to an end, and you get upended by Xavier.
Indiana Hoosiers - What in the literal fuck was that supposed to be? Weren't you supposed to make a big run this year? This was the best team you've had in almost a decade and you just decided to crumble like that?! Sure, Miami was playing the game of their lives but it still shouldn't have been a 16-point blowout. Well, could be worse I guess. You could be Purdue...
Kentucky Wildcats - Let's start with the good news first: You were not upset in the first round this time. Instead you get eliminated by your old friends from K-State yet again. Which is good because we don't have to deal with more arrogance from the Kentucky fanbase this time. Nobody like Kentucky, so there was much rejoicing.
Duke Blue Devils - Even with Coach K no longer in the College Basketball world, the Blue Devils still manage to appear in the NCAA Tournament as a reasonably high seed. They managed to end Oral Roberts' foolish ambitions in the first round (I really wanted to make more sex jokes from that...), but then got absolutely BTFOd by Tennessee in the next round. The Evil Empire has been stopped yet again. But they'll be back here again. The Blue Devils never stay down for long...
Marquette Golden Eagles - HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN?! Once again, Shaka Smart cannot make it past the first weekend of the tournament. Tom Izzo's Spartans put him in his place yet again. For fuck's sake, it's been a DECADE since Smart's coaching schemes got exposed by John Beilein in 2013. And he still has not gotten the message. Did I ever tell you the definition of insanity, Mr. Smart?
Auburn Tigers - Thanks for allowing us to laugh at Iowa again, Auburn. Now enjoy getting slaughtered by Houston in the next round.
Kansas Jayhawks - For the second year in a row, the defending national champion falls in the second round. Kansas appeared as if they would have this game in the bag, as they led by as much as 10 throughout the game. But then the team just imploded. The Razorbacks fought their way back and managed to eke out the win in the final seconds. Cherish that championship, Kansas. It may be the only one you win for a while.
TCU Horned Frogs - It seems like TCU sports are on the rise as of late. Their football team made the College Football Playoff, and their basketball team entered the tournament as a #6 seed! They even won another tournament game! But unfortunately they failed to make us laugh at Gonzaga again, as the Bulldogs narrowly escaped with the win.
Northwestern Wildcats - Welcome back to the tournament again, Northwestern! Even though this is only your second NCAA tournament appearance, you managed to win another tournament game! But a deep run just wasn't in the cards for you this time. Even after giving UCLA all they could handle, it just wasn't enough. I hope the Wildcats are able to make it back here again someday. Chris Collins seems to have something good going at Evanston. Let's see how things go the next few years.
Missouri Tigers - Congrats, Missouri! You won your first tournament game in 13 years! Your reward is to get absolutely blown the fuck out by another set of Tigers...who were seeded 15th. Come on now. Sure, Princeton was playing the game of their lives, but it still shouldn't have been a 15-point blowout. You're one of the contestants for a future Legacy of Failure script, Missouri. Give me something to truly laugh at and it'll be icing on the cake.
Maryland Terrapins - I'm gonna save the Big Bill Hell's rant this time. The Terps seemed to put a decent fight in the first half, but the Crimson Tide decided that was far enough, and put them out of their misery.
Princeton Tigers - Congrats, Princeton! You returned to the Sweet 16 for the first time in 56 years, and are only the fourth 15 seed to reach the Sweet 16! Third one in a row to do so, in fact! But all good things must come to an end, and there was another team looking to end their own demons. Creighton returned to the Elite Eight for the first time since the year Pearl Harbor happened.
Alabama Crimson Tide - The third #1 seed to fall this tournament. The Tide controlled the tempo most of the game, but the Aztecs eventually took the lead and never looked back. Once again, Alabama's dream to be a champion in both football and basketball like Michigan did in 1989 has not come to fruition. Maybe next year?
Tennessee Volunteers - Tennessee manages to return to the Sweet 16. And that's as far as they go. It's time for them to be upset by an inferior team again, and this time it's Florida Atlantic. The only time it appeared as if the Vols controlled the game was in the first half. But then FAU decided they wanted to go further. They took the lead in the second half, even leading by as much as 10 points, but they didn't relinquish it, making their first ever Elite Eight.
Michigan State Spartans - Congratulations! Your team finally made it past the second round! But the Sweet 16 is as far as you go. And they screwed up big time. This was yet another game where MSU's opponent was doing their best to hand the game to them, but they once again couldn't capitalize on their mistakes. K-State was literally handing them the game on a silver platter. They blew multiple leads and were even pushed into overtime. They even let you stay in the game until the final seconds! But then you just had to fuck up and let Markquis Nowell dance on your ashes, even letting him make NCAA history in the process.
Houston Cougars - What the hell was that, Houston? That has got to be arguably the worst performance by a 1 seed in the Sweet 16 in recent memory! This was the best team you've had since the days of Phi Slama Jama, and you go and do THAT?! Jesus Christ, you're pathetic. It wasn't even a contest, Miami barely even had to fucking try! Well, at least you're joining a real conference in the Big 12 next season. Hopefully the opponents from that conference can toughen you up and make you more formidable in next year's tournament.
Xavier Musketeers - Congrats, Xavier! You returned to the Sweet 16 for the first time in six years! Enjoy getting absolutely mauled by the Longhorns.
UCLA Bruins - Now this was a shock to see. This was the absolute inverse of 2006. The Bruins build up a big lead, only for Gonzaga to come back and build a big lead...only for the Bruins to storm right back and go up by 1. Or not. Maybe this is a repeat of 2006?
"Strawther for the lead...BULLSEYE!!!!"
And the Bulldogs have finally gotten their proper revenge for 2006, where they lost in the West region after blowing a big lead in the Sweet 16. Adam Morrison laughs, and the rest of the country breaths as sigh of relief as they don't have to see Los Angeles win another championship.
Arkansas Razorbacks - Great job, Arkansas! You managed to knock off the defending national champions! Your prize is to get absolutely steamrolled by UConn in the next round...by 23 points. Great...
Creighton Bluejays - Congrats, Creighton! You returned to the Elite Eight for the first time since WORLD WAR II!! And you're on the verge of becoming the first team from Nebraska to make the Final Four, beating out even the Cornhuskers! Imagine that! But it was not to be. The Bluejays built up a decent lead, and were on the verge of becoming the first #6 seed to make the Final Four since the Fab Five Michigan squad in 1992. But they couldn't hold it, as the Aztecs slowly crawled their way back. The Bluejays didn't really make any big mistakes, they didn't foul all that much, but at the end of the day it wasn't enough. They nearly sent the game into OT, but then...a last second foul call gave the Aztecs new life (Refball? You decide.). They would lose by a point. They were THAT close. But I honestly can't be mad at them. Still a successful season though. Hopefully next year you can get over the hump.
Kansas State Wildcats - I swear to god, K-State has to be the most unlucky team in NCAA Tournament history. This was their NINTH trip to the Elite Eight since their last Final Four berth in 1964 and they fell just short yet again. And like in 2010 and 2018, it was to a Cinderella team. First it was Butler. Then it was Sister Jean's henchmen from Loyola-Chicago. Now, it was FAU. Despite having a strong roster, the Wildcats once again could not end their long Final Four drought. Folks like to talk about Purdue being unlucky, but I think the real bridesmaid here is K-State. Just absolutely brutal. Which is why they're a candidate for my next Legacy of Failure script.
Texas Longhorns - This was very much a Days of our Steelers season for Longhorns basketball. Head coach Chris Beard was axed following an incident where he beat his wife (FUCKING IDIOT), and assistant Rodney Terry had to step in and clean up the mess. Thankfully, it was a good hire. Terry helped guide the Longhorns to their best season in ages, as they returned to the Elite Eight for the first time in 15 years. It appeared as if they were on the verge of returning to the Final Four for the first time in two decades! But then, the team straight up SHAT THE BED. Texas could not get anything going at all near the end of the game, as the Hurricanes came back from 13 points down to make their first Final Four. YOU BLEW IT!!!
Though lets be honest here, the refs were absolute dogshit. Calling blatant offensive fouls as fouls on the player guarding, are you fucking kidding me? Still, the Longhorns did screw up and blow that lead. Blame the refs all you want, but you want to know what would have helped? Not blowing a 13 point lead late in the second half. But at least Rodney Terry has shown that he can coach. Hopefully he can lead this Texas team to new heights in the future.
Gonzaga Bulldogs - pukes uncontrollably Fucking hell, are you kidding me? What the hell were you doing all game long? This was your ALL-IN year. You were the top scoring team in the country. You had the best player in the nation in Drew Timme! And you got absolutely beaten to a pulp by the team that beat you in your first Elite Eight appearance 24 years ago. Sure, UConn was playing the game of their lives, but it still shouldn't have been a near-30 point slaughter. You managed to unleash the Pandora's Box of Locusts known as UConn fans on the College Basketball world. Your Legacy of Failure continues. UConn is still getting the best of you after all these years, eh?
Florida Atlantic Owls - Oh my god, it's going to happen! The Owls are about to make history! They're up by 14! Sure the Aztecs cut that lead down to 1 in the final seconds, not to mention the refs are absolute shit, but the Owls are about to make history and become the first 9 seed to make the National Championship! Let's hear it for FAU!
"They don't have their scorers on the floor...it's Butler, with 2 seconds, he's gotta put it up and...-buzzer sounds- HE WINS IT!!! HE WINS IT WITH THE JUMPER!!! A San Diego State Miracle!"
OH MY MERCIFUL GOD!!! Well, this sucks. But it was still a successful season nonetheless. The third 9 seed to ever make the Final Four, and it happened in your second NCAA tournament appearance! Well, you'll be joining a better conference in the AAC next year. Hopefully you can make another big run like this again someday.
Miami Hurricanes - Congrats, Miami! You made your first Final Four in school history! And then the fun stops. UConn comes in to spoil the day. I would rip on Miami here, but nothing went right for this at all this game. Nothing. Missing 14 layups in the second half? Christ, that's brutal. Even though Jim Larrañaga tried his best to get Miami's stars on the right track, they were no match for the Huskies. Whenever Miami tried to strike back, UConn said 'Nope!' and put the Hurricanes on lockdown for the rest of the game. Nonetheless, this was a good run for Miami this year. You'll be back here eventually.
Whew, that was a crazy tournament. Now we're finally down to only two. And only one of these teams will be walking away with a championship.
Let's bring out contestant number one...
Connecticut Huskies
The Huskies have returned to the National Championship for the fifth time in school history, and for the first time in almost a decade. The last time they were here, the Final Four was held in the other major Texas metropolis of Dallas-Ft. Worth, and the Huskies became the first 7 seed in NCAA Tournament history to win a National Championship. Now, they are here for more.
The face of this revived UConn squad has been Jordan Hawkins, a sophomore from Maryland who has been this team's leading scorer in their past two matchups against Arkansas and Gonzaga, and it has been a long road for him. During the season opener he suffered his second concussion in his playing career and had to sit out the first two games, but he has thankfully made a full recovery and is playing better than ever. Joining him has been African sensation Adama Sanogo, a two-time first-team All-Big East award winner. He and Hawkins have been the bread and butter of this UConn squad, as both have been leading the team in scoring in a majority of games this season. Sanogo has also been this team's rebounding machine, as he has led the team in rebounds in all four of their tournament games so far. Rounding out UConn's Big 3 has been Andre Jackson Jr., who has been the Assists leader for this team in 18 games including the NCAA Tournament.
UConn has been the hottest team in this tournament thus far, as they've won each of their first four games by at least 10 points or more. Iona? 14-point win. #5 St. Mary's? 15 point win. #8 Arkansas, who just took down the defending national champs? 23 point win. #3 seed Gonzaga, who had three-time consensus All-American Drew Timme? Doesn't matter to them, they won by 28. #5 Miami? Even though the Hurricanes tried to put up a fight, they were beaten by 13. This Huskies team is absolutely unstoppable. The last two teams who won their first five tournament games by double digits both went on to win the national title - North Carolina in 2009, and Villanova in 2018. And it looks like history is about to repeat itself. UConn is hungry for it's fifth national title.
This #4 seed is playing like a #1 seed, and they are for sure the favorite to win it all. Just like every other time UConn has a solid team in the tournament, it's National Championship or bust.
Prepare for their wrath.
But not if their opponents have anything to say about it...
San Diego State Aztecs
The Aztecs have made it to the National Championship game. Exactly as everyone predicted at the start of the tournament. What this team reminds me of is the drug addict that has had numerous chances to get his shit together but constantly relapsed every time. And it's only through a reflection and a last second intervention that he starts to get clean.
For a while it felt as if San Diego State would never make it here. Former Michigan head coach Steve Fisher and his longtime assistant Brian Dutcher spent YEARS building this team into a contender. And the Aztecs have put up many elite teams over the years, but could only go as far as the Sweet 16 at best.
2011 seemed to be their year. They fell to UConn. In 2014, they were a 4 seed. They fell to Arizona. And after a series of first and second round eliminations, they finally got over the hump and made it to the promised land, though just BARELY.
This run has been far from easy for the Aztecs. They escaped by 7 points against Charleston in the first round. In the second they destroyed Furman, who just upset Virginia. Then came the Sweet 16, their opponent was the overall #1 seed in Alabama. It looked like another early exit for the Aztecs again. But then, a miracle happened. They rallied from 9 points down in the second half against Alabama to take the lead for good and make their first ever Elite Eight. And in their first Elite Eight, Creighton pushed them to the limit. However, they managed to overcome another deficit and escape by the skin of their teeth in the last second (Refball? You decide.). Same case in their first ever Final Four. They trailed by fourteen against Florida Atlantic, and it felt as if that was it. But then, the Aztecs pulled off another miracle to win by 1. That miracle's name? Lamont Butler. This team is the Energizer Bunny of the tournament. They will not die no matter how much stress you put on them.
SDSU's sudden appearance in the National Championship feels less like a "Glad you made it here!" and more of a "FINALLY!!". Considering all of the elite talent and top-tier coaching they've possessed over the years, it's still surprising that it took them this long to get here. But hey, better late than never.
Fuck you, Spanos!
The face of this San Diego State team has been Matt Bradley, a two-time First-team All-Mountain West selection. Alongside him is Ghanaian sensation Nathan Mensah, who is known for his immense wingspan of 7'4 ft, and has led this team in rebounds in two of their four wins this tournament. Other standouts on this Aztecs team include Jaedon LeDee, Micah Parrish, Darion Trammell, and Lamont Butler, who has led the team in Assists this tournament.
Brian Dutcher has built a winner this tournament, but we all know what his ultimate goal is - a National Championship. Though it wouldn't be his first. His first title came with the 1989 Michigan team led by Glen Rice and Rumeal Robinson, where he was an assistant under Coach Fisher. Now he's looking to win one as a head coach.
The Aztecs seek to become the first team from California to win a national title in basketball since 1995. That year, UCLA won their 11th National Title in school history by knocking off the "40 Minutes of Hell" Arkansas squad, a rather formidable opponent on par with this UConn team. And no team from California has done it since.
Will San Diego State be the team to break that drought, and become the fourth team from the Golden State to win a National Title? Will they become the first non-power five conference team to win a National Title since UNLV did it in 1990?
Will the Aztecs become the first team from San Diego to win a championship in either the pros or college, and break the San Diego sports curse?
And so, here it is. The Big East Empire of Doom, versus the Mountain West's only hope!
Time for battle.
EPIC NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP JINXING
Unfortunately, there will be no miracles this time. I think UConn has this one in the bag. They've been destroying their opponents with ease, like North Carolina and Villanova before them. No matter what you throw at them, they'll just push it aside like a cardboard box. Their 28-point win over a stacked Gonzaga team is proof of this. They always seem to have an answer for whatever their opponents throw at them, and therefore the choice is easy.
UConn will steamroll the Aztecs by at least 10 points and cruise to a 5th National Championship, tying with both Duke and Indiana for the fourth most championships.
Have a nice day.

I'm binging the Indiana Jones movies while building the LEGO sets and I'm just trying to figure out the story of the opening. I've watched this movie repeatedly in my youth about as far back as age 6 or 7 since it was the only Indy movie we had on VHS, taped off TV.
So as I understand it, the scenario is this. Rich guy hires a team of diggers to go dig in a canyon near where Henry Jones Jr lives. Henry/Indy during a boy scout expedition just happens to see them dig up the Cross of Coronado. Now this is where kid logic and adult logic clash for me. As a kid I'm like okay, these diggers are bad guys cause young Indy says they are. This belongs in a museum right? This is just ethics. You find something of historical value (which of course you can tell the instant you see it. No need to carbon date of check if it's a fake) you're supposed to donate it or sell it to an American museum right? So Indy takes it, not bothering to check if these diggers you know, WORK for a museum? Also, has Indy perhaps not heard of the legal principal of 'finders keepers'?
Anyways, Indy runs. They chase. He comes across train tracks which I swear don't look like they're anywhere near the mountains Indy just came from... yadda yadda yadda, he gets away. Then the diggers track him down to his home and take back what Indy stole with the help of the Sherriff. The Sheriff apparently agrees with the principal of finders keepers so Indy's hands are tied. Indy catches sight of their boss, who looks evil in the way a Chicago gangster might look evil, but again, this is just nothing more than a nameless rich dude who hired a team to dig for things, and since the Sherriff is involved I'm guessing they had a permit.
Years later Indy is STILL after this thing that clearly belongs to nameless rich guy. What is Indy's deal at this point? It's like maybe, yes, this belongs in a museum, but does this justify sneaking onto rich guy's boat off the coast of Portugal, stealing the cross and killing everyone on the boat? Okay it's never been quite clear what is happening on that boat which explodes in a hurricane for no apparent reason... Maybe we can't hold Indy responsible for everyone on the boat but him dying... I thought as an adult this whole scene would make more sense, but I digress.
My point is, is Indiana Jones, post Ark of the Covenant, just going around to rich people's yachts trying to steal valuable artifacts they may legally posess? Is this some kind of, dare I say, moral crusade of his? As far as I can tell, this rich guy (who I'm sure has a name) is doing nothing wrong except be rich, and acquire things, as rich people do. Am I missing something?

The howling wind was the only sound that pierced the deafening silence that had enveloped the Airbnb deep within the Appalachian Mountains. My wife Emma and I had been looking forward to this getaway with our friends for months, eager to leave behind the stress of our mundane lives in the city. But as the minutes ticked by, the creeping sense of dread that had taken root in my stomach only seemed to grow stronger.
The rustic cabin we'd rented was charming, its wooden walls adorned with vintage trinkets and photographs that spoke of happier times. It was tucked away in a secluded corner of the forest, providing us with the perfect setting for a week of relaxation, laughter, and reconnecting with our closest friends. Little did we know that this idyllic retreat would soon turn into a waking nightmare.
Our friends, Jake and Lily, arrived the following day, their excitement palpable as we gathered around the fireplace to share stories and reminisce about our college days. The warmth of their company was a welcome distraction from the unease I'd been feeling, but the momentary reprieve was short-lived.
The first sign that something was amiss came from the shadows that danced across the living room walls, their twisted forms leaving me feeling as though I were being watched. I shook off the paranoia and attributed it to the flickering flames in the fireplace, but the sense of being observed remained, lurking in the back of my mind.
The next day, as we hiked along the wooded trails surrounding the cabin, I couldn't shake the feeling that we were being followed. I could hear the crunch of leaves underfoot, the snap of twigs, and the soft rustle of the underbrush, but every time I turned around, there was nothing but the dense forest staring back at me.
That night, after a long day of exploring, we all settled into our respective rooms. As I lay in bed next to Emma, the darkness of our room seemed to grow thicker, more oppressive. I could hear her gentle breathing beside me, but it did little to soothe the panic that began to rise within me.
It was then that I heard it – a faint, almost inaudible tapping on the window. My heart raced as I forced myself to investigate, my legs trembling beneath me. I pulled back the curtains, expecting to find the source of the sound, but there was nothing there. Just the blackness of the forest, the trees swaying gently in the breeze.
The following morning, I shared my experiences with Jake and Lily, hoping to find some comfort in their disbelief. But as I spoke, I saw the color drain from their faces, their eyes wide with terror.
"We heard it too," Lily whispered, her voice quivering. "We thought it was just the wind, but... it sounded like someone was tapping on our window."
Jake nodded solemnly, his jaw clenched. "We didn't want to say anything, didn't want to scare you guys, but we've been feeling like we're being watched ever since we got here."
The four of us sat in stunned silence, our minds racing with the horrifying possibilities. It was then that Emma suggested we search the property, hoping to put our fears to rest. But as we scoured the grounds, we found something that only fueled our terror – a series of footprints leading from the edge of the forest to each of the cabin's windows.
The realization that we were not alone, that someone was stalking us from the shadows, sent a chill down my spine. We decided to leave as soon as possible, cutting our vacation short in the hopes of escaping the unseen menace that haunted our every step.
But the nightmare was far from over.
As we hastily packed our belongings, I noticed that the trinkets and photographs on the walls seemed to have shifted. The once-cheerful images now took on a sinister quality, their subjects staring at us with cold, unblinking eyes. The vintage trinkets that had charmed us upon arrival now appeared twisted and macabre, as though they were remnants of a dark past we couldn't quite comprehend.
Outside, the wind had picked up, and the once-tranquil forest seemed to come alive with a sinister energy. The trees creaked and groaned, their branches clawing at the sky like desperate hands. As we loaded our bags into the car, I couldn't shake the feeling that we were being watched, that the unseen stalker was lurking just beyond the tree line, waiting for the perfect moment to strike.
With every mile that passed as we drove away from the cabin, I felt the weight of our terrifying experience slowly lifting from my shoulders. But the relief was short-lived. As we wound our way through the mountains, the dense fog that had settled over the road made it increasingly difficult to see. It was as if the forest itself was trying to keep us from leaving, to trap us within its dark embrace.
When our car suddenly sputtered and died, leaving us stranded on the side of the road, the terror that had been lurking at the edges of our minds came crashing down upon us. We were trapped, alone and vulnerable in the heart of the wilderness, with no way of knowing where our stalker might be hiding.
As we huddled together in the cold, the wind howling around us like a mournful dirge, I felt a sense of despair unlike anything I'd ever experienced. It was then that I realized the true horror of our situation – we were mere playthings for a predator that could strike at any moment, and there was nothing we could do to stop it.
The hours passed, each minute stretching into an eternity as we waited for help that might never come. The darkness of the night enveloped us, leaving us blind to the dangers that might be lurking just beyond the beam of our flashlight.
It was in that suffocating darkness that we heard the first whispers of movement in the forest. The soft crunch of leaves, the snap of twigs, the rustle of underbrush – all the sounds that had haunted our days in the cabin were now closing in on us.
My heart pounded in my chest as the sounds grew closer, the fear of the unknown threatening to consume me. And then, suddenly, a figure emerged from the shadows.
He was a tall, gaunt man with wild, unkempt hair and eyes that seemed to burn with a malevolent intensity. He moved toward us with a predatory grace, his long fingers clutching a rusted hunting knife that gleamed in the moonlight.
As he closed the distance between us, I knew that our fight for survival was only just beginning. We had to face the darkness that stalked us, to confront the nightmare that had been haunting us from the moment we'd set foot in the Appalachian Mountains.
And as the wind howled around us, drowning out our desperate cries for help, I could only hope that we would find the strength to survive the terror that had brought us to the edge of madness.
Emma, Jake, and Lily huddled together, their eyes wide with terror as the man approached us, his twisted grin revealing yellowed, jagged teeth. Instinct took over, and I lunged at him, desperate to protect the people I cared for most.
We fought, our struggle a chaotic dance of pain and fear, the knife glinting in the moonlight as it sliced through the air. The man was stronger than I'd anticipated, his grip like iron and his movements quick and nimble. But the adrenaline coursing through my veins lent me strength, and I managed to wrest the knife from his grasp.
With a guttural scream, I plunged the blade into the man's chest. He staggered back, his eyes wide with shock, before collapsing to the ground. As he lay there, gasping for breath, the once-menacing figure seemed to shrink, becoming nothing more than a sad, broken man.
We stood over him, our bodies trembling with a mixture of relief and horror at what we'd been forced to do. But our ordeal wasn't over yet. As we stared down at the man's lifeless body, the wind picked up, and the fog grew denser, as if the forest itself was mourning the death of one of its own.
We knew we had to keep moving. With the car dead and our phones unable to get a signal, we had no choice but to press on, hoping against hope that we would find our way to safety. We walked in silence, the weight of our actions heavy on our shoulders, the fear of what might still be lurking in the woods gnawing at our minds.
The darkness seemed to stretch on for an eternity, each step we took through the wilderness bringing us no closer to salvation. But as the first rays of sunlight broke through the canopy of trees, we finally stumbled upon a dirt road that led us to a small, remote town.
Exhausted, bloodied, and forever changed by our harrowing experience, we shared our story with the townspeople, who listened with a mixture of disbelief and pity. They told us tales of other visitors who had ventured into the forest, never to return, and of a local legend about a vengeful spirit that stalked the woods, seeking revenge for some long-forgotten crime.
As we left the town, grateful to be alive but haunted by the horrors we'd endured, I couldn't help but wonder if our tormentor had been a man driven to madness or something far more sinister. The truth, it seemed, would remain forever hidden within the shadows of the Appalachian Mountains.
In the years that followed, we tried our best to put the experience behind us. We rarely spoke of it, and when we did, it was in hushed whispers, as if speaking too loudly might somehow summon the darkness that had nearly claimed our lives.
But even as we tried to move on, the terror we'd faced in the Appalachian Mountains continued to cast a shadow over our lives. We could never truly escape the fear, the sense of being watched, the knowledge that somewhere out there, a malevolent force was waiting for us to return.
And so we remained, forever on the edge of our seats, haunted by the nightmare that had brought us to the brink of madness and left us with a lasting impression of horror that would never fade.

I was accepted into a MBA program in Sydney and am doing research into relocating / living in Sydney prior to accepting the offer.
I'm from Los Angeles which is a very competitive and expensive housing market. Thankfully I own my place in LA, but remember the days of apt hunting here. It wasnt fun. I remember offering 3-4 months upfront as a standard offer. I was once beat out by someone who offered a full year up front (unreal...)
I've heard Sydney has a housing shortage and a competitive rental market as well. I imagine as an international student with limited working abilities I would be near the bottom of the list for ideal renters. How tough would it be realistically for me to get a lease for my own apartment? If I offer to pay a few months up front would that give me an edge?

Now, they can’t see what happens, since their vision is too limited, but we can follow without a moment lost. So let’s dive down deep inside as we hasten after the rescued spirit while it enters the hollow shell. There are many layers we must bypass to reach our destination, so stick close and try not to get lost.
​
The Silent Man finds himself smack in the middle of a strange forest, with every tree looking exactly the same. He looks every which way, but there’s no indication of anything other than an endless expanse of identical trees. He has just enough light, from an unknown source, that he can see within a close proximity.
​
A shadow breaks in the immediate vicinity just ahead and weaves its way through the trees as it draws near. The figure dashes about giggling all the while as the sound it makes echoes throughout the forest. It stops a short distance away, but close enough that its visage can clearly be seen, revealing itself to be a boy.
​
“Come on,” the youth calls out, as he gestures and wanders back into the shadow.
​
The Silent Man follows at a slow pace as the boy appears and disappears randomly, but continues in the same forward journey. A nuisance to be sure, but not enough to deter his progress which is slow yet deliberate. It’s during this progression that he is bombarded with a voice that flies upon the wind and runs along his ear.
​
“Boy. My boy. My little boy,” it says over and over, the words drumming in the man’s head. “My little Timothy.”
​
The Silent Man does all he can to block the voices which includes focusing on the task at hand as he breaks free of the trees and finds himself in a graveyard. Each grave is marked with them same two names, Samuel and Mary Anne. The boy once again continues to appear as he beckons the man to follow.
​
Again there are voices on the wind. “Bury the dead. Keep them from coming back,” they continue to drum upon every nerve he possesses.
​
The Silent Man pushes on, shaking the sounds as best he can while he carries on through a dark recess. Once the light returns he finds himself staring down a long hallway with high walls surrounding him and bars on either side. Still the boy appears, still calling while running between the bars as though they were not there.
​
There are more voices on the wind. “Keep away. Bury the past,” they hammer away as they chip at his very sanity, but he will not let them drive him mad.
​
The Silent Man comes to a door at the end of the hall and places his hand to the latch. He opens it and the room disappears as though someone just pulled it away. Now there’s a world surrounded by an impenetrable black that pours over every inch and smack in the middle is a very familiar cabin which he enters and finds the boy inside.
​
“Time to accept who you are,” the youth speaks as he opens wide his arms, ready to accept the man who has just entered.
​
The Silent Man draws near with his slow, deliberate steps that not even the floor acknowledges. He looks to the boy as he takes hold of an object that is propped against the wall. Slowly, he crosses the floor and stands before the youth, who smiles as he beams into the man’s face. This is it, the meeting of two identities.
​
All at once, a look of shock spreads across the boy’s face as his head rolls off his shoulders and hits the floor. His body follows closely behind as it collapses. The Silent Man holds the sword which he had retrieved from the wall. He stares down at the lifeless body with a cold indifference. The boy has been dispatched. The voices have stopped. The dream is over. The Silent man awakes.

Some background info: my mom passed away almost a year ago. She left the house to me and my 3 other siblings. (One is estranged so he’s not rly part of the picture other than him getting his cut.) It’s definitely a fixer upper, it was neglected for decades with some “fixes” my dad made that let’s just say were not up to code. We wanted to keep the house as a cabin/vacation home but funds are limited. The plan was to fix it and do some remodeling and air bnb it a few times to make enough money to pay for the taxes/bills. My sister and brother in law lived near it and are currently staying there while they sell they’re house. Unfortunately, we live 2 hours away so we can only work on this house every other weekend as that’s all that works with our schedule.
Right now, my husband and brother in law are basically putting in all the work, my sister usually works nights so I don’t really see her other than the few hours before/after her shift. I’m the one wrangling the kids (we have 2 kids age 2 & 4), feeding them, keeping them occupied and help some with the remodeling here and there. We don’t get there until Friday night and leave Sunday morning so this just leaves Saturday to really get any work done.
But Friday night, my husband goes out, sometimes with BIL. And they always end up going out Saturday night too. I don’t mind my husband wanting to go out. He’s a very social person and since we lost our babysitter and can’t find a new one, he’s been staying home with the kids while I work since I made quite a bit more money than him. I’d feel bad for asking him to not go out when he’s home all the time with the kids. And he really has been great with this. (He does go out once in a while when we’re home also).
But honestly when we come up to the cabin it would be nice if at least one night we could all hang out and spend time together after working. Maybe have a bon fire or play cards. I really just end up sitting here alone with my kids until they fall asleep and then I might as well go to sleep too. There’s no cable/Wi-Fi and very spotty reception. So I kind of just sit here, maybe read a book. I’ll get up with the kids 7am Saturday morning cuz they were out partying. My husbands up at 10/11 but it could be 12/2pm before anyone else is. Work for a while and then sit at the cabin again when they go out.
I’ve talked to my husband before about maybe only going out one night and they did one weekend we were up and it went right back to both. I’d love to go with them but we don’t have a babysitter in this remote area. My sister called in both days this weekend so she was here last night but went out with them tonight so here I sit watching “Sing” with the kids on dvd.
I should add that before my mom died, we would all come up to visit so we had my brother and his girlfriend and 2 year old, my mom and her bf, my sister and brother in law and their 6 yr old, and me and my husband and kids. They all went out including my mom and I would watch the 6 yr old (other 2 yr old was always sleeping before they left). I don’t mind as he’s really no trouble. But again, I’m always here by myself when everyone else goes out cuz they know I’m rly not the biggest fan of it unless we can all go out together or I’d rather us just all hang out at home. But now it’s just my family’s and sister and brother in law and nephew. So I get that but my point is this has been happening for a long time.
The kids love coming up here but honestly it’s not fun for me. I don’t want to take it away from them but really if I’m just going to sit around with limited food options and nothing to do… I’d rather just stay home where I can do what I want. It would be cheaper not having to buy food and snacks and he could leave earlier and get more work done.
Would I be the AH if I told him I wanted to just stay home with the kids and he could just go up for the weekend? I know it will make him feel guilty but honestly why am I here?

I've posted here pretty frequently over the last few years about my JNMIL. I'm back after another awful visit. Here is a little background info to help understand family dynamics:
-My husband (39M) and I (33F) have been together for 13 years, married for 4. -Shortly after we bought our home and got engaged we were given emergency custody of SILs child through foster care. He was 7 months old at the time. Rights were terminated and his adoption was finalized at 2.5 y/o. He is now 5. -We had a biological child as we were going through the adoption process of our son. My almost 3 y/o son was 2 months old at the adoption finalization of older son - Husband has 3 siblings. 2 are currently incarcerated with felony charges and have struggled with substance abuse for more than 10 years and are completely enabled by they're mother. The other likely has a drinking problem but is independent and doesn't communicate with his mother. -My husband is a kind, hard-working man who forgives far too easily and can be steamrolled. He feels a deep sense of responsibility and obligation to his family of origin. He is 5, 7, and 16 years older than his siblings so often plays a paternal role to them. -JNMIL moved across the country a few months after my son's adoption was finalized so for the majority of this saga of me standing up for myself, she's been out of state
Historically, I kept my mouth shut when JNMIL would abuse my husband. I was raised to be respectful towards adults so I just followed my husband's lead. There were a few times in the first 10 years that I would interject, but it was pretty rare. The night before my wedding my JNMIL went absolutely crazy at me. She referred to me as her son's future ex wife and told me my family didn't love me. She also called me a bitch and stormed out of the rehearsal dinner. It was horrible but I moved on and didn't let it impact our relationship. Then, I became a mother. I refused to allow her to treat me, my husband, or my children in this same way. Everything went downhill at the adoption finalization of my son. Since then she and I have had almost no communication that wasn't hostile (read history).
We just got back from a visit to see her. This was the fourth time we rescheduled from Christmas due to flight cancellations. We flew in late Monday night and had an early flight home on Friday morning so we were only going to be in town for 3 days. Of course, she started to bitch at my husband that we were only coming in for a few days and that we were staying too far from her condo (4 miles, 12 minutes). I was annoyed because she was in town for one of her kids court cases the week before. She demanded to see my husband but didn't make any attempt to see our children while she was in town.
Tuesday morning my husband was getting the rental car and she's calling him nonstop yelling at him that we're not there yet. It wasn't even 10 am yet and our flight arrived super late - close to midnight the night before. We arrive to her condo around 11 and she pulls out the kids Christmas gifts. It's an obnoxious scene - so much crap that they don't need and we can't even bring back with us because we are flying. She is rushing my kids and telling them they're opening the gifts too slowly. It's obnoxious. We try to give her the present we got for her and she won't open it. The day goes on and she isn't even interacting with my kids because she refuses to be near me. Every time I walk into a room, she leaves. The kids obviously want to be around me so she gets very little interaction with them. By 6pm I'm begging my husband to figure out what's going on for food since she didn't have lunch for us. He suggests we go to dinner and she talks about making food. It was a dish the kids wouldn't eat so I kindly ask if we can just save half a chicken breast and cook it plain for the kids. She sends her husband to go get chicken nuggets for the boys and then I start cutting up veggies. The food never gets cooked, though, and we end up ordering pizza at 8pm. Then, as we are trying to leave, she pulls my husband aside to bitch about the gift we gave her. It was a digital photo frame where we could upload pictures because she's always complaining that she doesn't get any pictures of the kids. She tells my husband that the gift is stupid and she's going to throw it in the ocean. My husband sits there while she yells at him. When we go to leave, she's still mad and we can't find her. We say goodbye to her husband and she's outside as we leave. She embraces my 5 y/o and says to him "I miss you the best" and doesn't even say anything to my 2.5 y/o. I tell him to "say goodbye to Grandma" and he does and she doesn't respond. I point it out to my husband who claims he didn't notice it but says he won't tolerate that.
The next day, she's a little better about interacting with my 5 y/o but stays clear of the 2.5 y/o because he's mainly with me. I told my husband I couldn't stay there all day again and told him we need to go out for dinner instead of dealing with the nonsense from the night before. Early on he's talking about making reservations and she yells at him about not making reservations before we arrived and not planning things (he tried but she shot everything down). My husband makes a 6pm dinner reservation for all of us but when the time comes to leave she refuses to come and then later calls my husband to tell him how selfish we are for going to dinner and for treating this trip as a family vacation and not allowing her to spend time with the boys. She's literally insane. My husband listens and doesn't put her in her place.
Then the last day. I had told my husband that all I wanted to do was go to the beach and that I was sick of visiting JNMIL and just sitting in her condo and not doing things. This is how it's been every time we've visited. So I told him that he needed to tell her that we were going to go to the beach and she could meet us there. She told him she couldn't handle the beach due to her health. She also told him she was upset because it didn't seem like the 2.5 year old liked her. This is crazy because this child throws himself at her for attention (drives me crazy) and she just gives him nothing. Anyway, we went to her house in the late morning with plans to go to the beach in the afternoon. Around 1 I was starving so I suggested we go eat. We went to a restaurant and invited his mom but she said no. Then she showed up at the restaurant after we ordered. When the food arrived she began cutting up and FEEDING my 5 y/o! It was so uncomfortable to watch. When he said no she would give it to my 2.5 year old. Then my husband was cutting up the younger ones food and she snapped at my husband and said "This isn't a competition!" He just says "I know" and then she says under her breath "you're just a bunch of assholes". I tell her not to use that language and try to tell my husband what she said but he didn't respond. Then she left the restaurant.
We go back to her house and even though we left the restaurant after her (and walked when she drove) we arrive before her. When she gets there she sits down and starts saying to her husband while we're all around "Well, they're going to go to the beach. Its obviously a set up because they don't think I'll go. The only one who actually wants me around is 5y/o. They are just setting me up but I obviously have to go if I want to see 5 y/o". I'm tired of this so I say to my husband, "You should probably be a part of this conversation". She tells me not to talk, that she wasn't talking to me. And I stand up to her and tell her what she is saying is ridiculous and if she has concerns or questions she should have a conversation instead of whatever she's doing. She gets mad and starts yelling at me so I say, "Alright guys, it's time to go to the beach. Say goodbye to Grandma". She gets angry and starts screaming at me that she's their grandmother and it's not a competition. I say, "you're right, it's not a competition. I'm their mother". Then she goes, "I know" and starts mimicking how I use my 5y/o full name to redirect him. She did this because she's mad we changed his last name with the adoption (even though it's the same last name as 2 of her kids). Then she tells my son to go to me but uses my first name, not mom. Which she has never done before and I'm certain was a slight that I'm not his biological mom. We leave and she's ridiculous. I tell her not to come to the beach. She has since been calling my husband nonstop. She wanted us to come back to her house for one final goodbye because she claims to be dying. I told my husband I was not going back to the house and if she wanted to say bye to the kids again she could go to the beach. She didn't.
She continues to call my husband and is saying how selfish we are and all this nonsense. I'm so over all of this crap. I hate her and would gladly just completely cut her out of our lives but my husband won't allow it. This has ruined my relationship with my husband and the resentment is deep. I'm pissed he checks out when we're around her and avoids tackling things honestly with her. He has been more supportive of me but he is not engaged enough to truly acknowledge the abuse. I've thought about divorce but it scares me that he would take the kids to see her without me present and he would be disengaged and not protect them from things she does and say. Through it all, I do know he is trying to do what I need but I am not sure he is capable because he is just showing a trauma response when he interacts with her.
I also feel terrible because despite all her abuse, my kids like her. It drives me insane. My son was really upset about leaving and that killed me. I explained to him that sometimes grandma isn't nice to mom when that happens we have to leave because it's my job to keep us all safe. I'm not sure if that was the right thing to do or not.
I don't really know why I'm posting, just needed to type this up. I am proud of myself for not going back to her house. I am proud for leaving. I just wish she didn't have such an impact on my life or relationship.

I have an album that, as far as I can tell, is not able to be found anywhere online. You will not find anything about it (besides this post) if you look it up. I have tried searching for it by name, checking websites, looking through streaming services, documentation on Discogs, & for mentions of it on YouTube (& other similar sites), yet came back empty handed.
It is an album by The Singing Hueni Family, being their Self-Titled album released somewhere around the early 1970’s, & sold/pressed most likely in Indiana, near Mishawaka. It is a religious record consisting of 11 tracks & mixes between the Gospel & Country genres for its sound. During its 29:15 runtime, it focuses on topics about family & Christian values, along w/ various moments throughout the family’s life.
The group consisted of 6 Members, being Herbert E. Hueni (1932 - 2021), Ruth Elizabeth Miller (1934 - 2017), Brian (Jacki) Hueni, Renee (Craig) Miller, Sheryl (Dan) Ingle and Kevin (Laura) Hueni, w/ Linda Lou Hire (1943 - March 3, 2016) as a producer involved with the band. Herbert was a singer early on in his life, & would take part in several other choirs before making up the group. They seemed to be popular enough at the time to be signed to the record label Central Sound, leading to the recording sessions on the record label, creating several albums-worth of music. Despite this, this album seems to be the only one that has resurfaced from that period, as all of the others are lost to time.
I got my copy of it in 2020 during a Summer family trip to go see our Aunts & Uncles in Indiana. (We live in Texas.) Eventually, my Uncle Joel would reveal to me that he had some records in his house that he wanted me to have since he no longer played/collected records, & wanted to give them to me as I was starting to make a collection of my own. It was a pile of some 10-12 records released in the 50’s & 60’s, with this one sitting in between others by Tennessee Ernie Ford & Mitch Miller. Most of them I could easily find & look at info about, but this slipped through the cracks.
I’ve linked a reference page for the album that I made, which you can find here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1r003pTOD6CCsHZdyJflFIdZs1F6c8-wf3u_i9lmOh-8
I hope that we can find out more information about this album, as it seems like an interesting piece that was forgotten to time.

Any guys in here around the Baltimore area or near the airport? I fly in at 11:15 pm and I’m pretty sure the rental place is going to close before I can get there 🥴🥹 Uber is $40…looking for a ride to my hotel for my phallo consultation. I know it’s late as hell, you don’t know me and I honestly didn’t think I’d ever ask for a ride from a stranger either but here I am. 💀

Moving myself, my wife and our 2 kids (4 year old twins) to Fredericton this summer. My wife will be attending UNB, but with us having kids we probably don't want to live near the university, since I would assume that area would be a little more noisy than we'd like.
What neighborhoods should we be looking for rentals in? Our big priority is a good elementary school, since our kids will be starting kindergarten in September. Looking for a quiet, family type area.
We'll be looking for an apartment or maybe like half of a split level house.
Also, what neighborhoods should we definitely avoid?
Appreciate any thoughts!

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
It feels like it’s already been weeks since Mila was forced to fight to the death. I can’t tell time here anymore. I just sleep when I need to with no sense of time. At first it messed with my head for a while and I think I went a little insane for a moment, but once you realize that you don’t need it because you don’t need a schedule anymore. It can make you a lot more focused on the now. Gunter has been staying with Mila and barely stays in his own room anymore. We don’t know if she got the previous tenants room or she got hers upgraded since she won the battle against Níðhöggr, but Mila’s room is an entire mountain range. Gunter has been cultivating at the base of the mountains and taking care of Mila. He really loved her cherry blossom trees and spider lilies. I stayed with them for a few days and loved it too after a while. Mila chose a cave in the mountains that she said would work best for her recovery.
Mila’s biology works like a snake’s in a tank and can grow as big as her surroundings. Due to her limited space and food supply in her room that she was sealed in, she was small compared to her full potential. Her new demon noh mask was hard to get used to, but I kind of like it now. It looks pretty bad ass with the horns and tusks. The human skin color it chose wouldn’t be my first choice however. Her new dark red exoskeleton definitely makes up for that though. She doesn’t look anything like the Mila we first met, but we love her no matter how she looks. Pushed to her limits she could wrap an entire mountain if she wanted to or be as small as several inches.
Gunter as well has impressed me. For a small 5 foot something man he’s pretty fast and strong. On his own he can track up the 7,000 foot mountains to get to Mila and back in a little under an hour. I’ve gone with him a few times. We’d track normally and talk for a few hours and he’ll either carry me with him, which still takes him a few hours, or just do the rest alone. Jim, Jon, Siete and her many children visit too. We have meetings to discuss the plan while the kids play in Gunter’s forest that he filled with insects and fruit groves. Gunter also spent a few hours building me a cabin with one of his picks. It was actually really good and the furniture that he built is extremely comfortable.
We went over some ideas and shared what all of us can do during our meeting. I feel like an average Joe sitting among superheroes when I heard what just their species alone can do, plus Gunter, Mila and Jim have some unique talents. When they asked what I can do I decided to lighten the mood by doing the removable thumb trick. No one thought it was funny and we waisted almost an hour explaining to Gunter it wasn’t real. He still thinks I can remove my limbs at will, but choose not to. First thing we needed to do was find Baba Yaga. The Host’s hive mind knows of Klaus and has some memories of him, but we have no idea where he is or if he has a room. Baba Yaga might have some insight and Gunter thinks she should be our main priority. I still think there’s more to what he’s willing to tell us.
Gunter says she was never a tenant as far as he knows and knew her way before he lived here. She practices the arts of the witches, enchantresses, sorceresses and necromancers to name a few. She also spends most of her time in her cabin. Her and her cabin are similar to Withorp and the complex as in wherever it is, she is. If her cabin is somehow either inside or trapped in The Pandemonium Complex then maybe we can find it. Gunter knows what her door looks like if they happen to come across it, but Gunter can’t just run around the complex wildly. One he might catch unwanted attention and none of us know how big this place is if we just search everywhere. Siete said she can send her children, but it’ll take an unknown amount of time for them to come back and tell her what every door looks like and who knows if it’ll still be there by the time they get there. She does have another idea though.
Her hive mind is strong when the spiders are many, but even stronger when there’s less. With less it’ll be like she can see through every one of her children at once. She definitely hates the idea, but it may be our only one. We gave them the best days of their lives as best we could. A few days after that meeting Siete showed up at the cabin Gunter built without The Host and with her children riding on her. There looked to be about 500-600 left from her thousands. We didn’t ask or pry what she had to do, so we carried on with our plan. Siete told us she can also connect us to The Host hive if we wanted to so we can all at least instantly communicate with each other. We won’t have visuals like her, but we can hear her thoughts immediately like a walkie talkie. To be honest I think we all agreed out of respect. She killed her own children for our sake, the least we could do is be there for her.
The smallest spiders from her cluster with long thin legs crawled up each of us and as much as we hated it. We had to let them crawl into our ear canal. We all shuddered hard and tried our best to let them do their job. I can’t speak for the others, but imagine a wild tickle in your ear that sounds like wind blowing hard directly in. Suddenly an intense pain in my ear drum started making it ring loud and hard. Once the ringing started to fade I kept hearing a beautiful woman’s voice saying, hello, softly over and over again. I looked over at Siete, who was standing on the dining room table and asked if that was her. She bounced a little while I could hear that voice saying yes happily. Even Jon had to comment how beautiful she sounded. Definitely a mother’s voice if I’ve ever heard one, which made us hate what we had to make her do so much more.
We played around with our new voiceless communication and had to tune it to not hear every thought. Didn’t think that would be a problem until all of us could hear Jon’s intrusive thoughts while he was staring at Jim. Ever seen a hulking big green apeman turn bright red? It is hilarious, but now I have images in my head that I’m afraid will never go away. Since Siete is now also without The Host she needs a new spot. We decided to keep her under Gunter’s cornucopia. We enjoyed our last day of peace, but now we had to start our search. Siete sent out her children and we listened intently to her kids updates of anything out of the ordinary. Gunter and Siete focused to show Siete what door they’re looking for. So far no door, but we heard a couple of interesting sightings.
The Wisps are back at their pranks again, little light fairies that can cast visual illusions that have been tricking tenants into entering unlocked rooms. Gulp, the bottomless traveling portal, ate the zombie horde, thankfully now I won’t get cramped in the elevator again when they were up to 13 zombies. Her was seen consuming that shape shifting lizardman who loved pretending to be politicians, near my room and tried desperately holding on to a door with chains. Girin and Kuba, the giant black bear forest spirit are fighting in the hallway near Gunter’s room because neither would move so the other could pass again. Adrenepae, the wife of Apollo who ate his heart, looks like she finally can control her avatar of fire form now and is roaming the hallways.Tate the warlock is stalking Beta, the techno organic virus, who has a new female host body; weird little creep. What caught our attention the most was the new tenant that entered the lobby.
He was a darker skinned man with long dreads that had metal links. He wore a long green coat with a satchel. The big headphones and reflective sunglasses were also a nice touch. Me, Jim and Jon went to the lobby to see. We are pretty nosy and we might as well kill some time people watching. Us breaking routine and avoiding Winthorp might also cause suspicion. We have people checking in all the time, but this guy was different as the complex was seemingly treating him as a long time tenant. The lobby works like a one way mirror and with new potential tenants it hides us and the current theme of the lobby before they get approved. I’ve only seen it a few times, but when someone new enters, to us they’re surrounded by a clear cube that limits what they can see when they’re inside. While inside they can only see what the complex wants them to see and nothing as far as I know can enter or leave this pocket dimension box.
With this man however there is no box. The complex didn’t feel the need to hide us or his surroundings for some odd reason. He was ignoring it all though as if he’s been here. He even walked right past Agatha & Mrs. Donahue, seemingly two old ladies that are always playing chess in the lobby and try speaking with anyone in a gentle neighborly tone. You must never speak to them however. They are a Lich and a Fae, but not a nice one like Gunter. The longer you talk to them the more they ruin and steal your life. I was lucky enough to have Jim & Jon stop me before I could reply to their hellos, their friendly faces immediately turned to anger when their meal was not taking the bait. The man paid them no mind and walked right past when they tried waving him down. He was speaking to Winthorp who also was paying the man special attention.
He kept referring to him as they and them when speaking. Winthorp also was standing at full attention before the man walked up. I’ve never seen him so eager to greet a potential new tenant. When it came down to signing the leger he did so without saying a word, but when he finished Winthorp said all new tenants must sign. We didn’t understand at first, when suddenly the man held out his arm and pulled up his sleeve. His arm was covered in a mix of branded and ink tattoos of symbols I’ve never seen before. His closed right palm began to glow a color I’ve never seen before and probably was never meant to be seen by human eyes. He opened his palm and a flash bright enough to blind half the lobby engulfed the room. When we looked back after shielding our eyes there was now a woman with him.
She had turquoise colored skin, long black hair, a beautiful purple choli that had modern accessories and a satchel bag that matched the man’s. She also signed the ledger and was greeted with as much enthusiasm the man was getting by Winthorp. I asked Jim and Jon if they knew who or what they were, but they had no idea. I then asked my internal host Siente if she’s seeing this. A familiar ringing began in my ear and I could hear her voice once again. This had her curiosity immediately when the first words I heard are, interesting. Siente has no knowledge of the man, but the woman is theorized to be a djinn and an old one at that. Siente said that physical djinns are extremely rare and are the most powerful kind, but what caught Siente’s attention was that she wasn’t bound.
Djinns are normally adorned with bright jewelry to symbolize that they are bound to the human world and must obey the law of the bound djinns when on the mortal plain. This djinn was somehow free and in full control which can normally only be done if wished to be free by the master. They also usually leave once freed to return to the realm of the untamed elements, like a fish running back to water. Once checked in we saw Winthorp provide them with what looked like a metal jewelry box that the man put in his satchel. They started walking towards the elevator when I decided to introduce myself. The man stopped first and raised his brow behind those shades, but the djinn stood between us and signaled me to halt with her outstretched arm. Or at least that’s what I thought.
I was thrown backwards by an unseen force, but was luckily caught by Jim. Jon stood in front and began to growl hard in anger. Jon’s size began to increase steadily with his rage and the air around us began getting hotter. I saw his gray fur begin to tense with his flex of dominance and I yelled for him to calm down. Jim put me down and rested his hand on Jon’s shoulder. Jon began to almost instantly relax. Jim stepped in front and apologized, but the woman held her hand back up as a warning to not approach. The man this time relaxed her by resting his hand on the top of her forearm. She looked surprised and shocked by this. The man walked up to Jim, took off his glasses and moved his headphones to around his neck. He looked Jim up and down like he was inspecting him. The man’s eyes were a bright mix of blue and green.
The man asked what tribe he is from and Jim answered. The 13th Wukong of the Nán Providence, but has been Omega ranked in the Tauá-Miri clan for a few decades now. He then looked over to Jon and asked him. Jon only replied with, nikto, and both Jon and the man averted their gaze when the man apologized. The man then looked towards me and apologized for his girlfriend's defensive behavior. We shook hands and greeted each other properly. The man’s name was Oddo and his girlfriend was Desiree. She still watched me with hard suspicious looks while we talked. The man asked me what I was. I told him I’m just human, he stared for a while. He then looked me up and down like he did with Jim and asked how long I’ve lived here. I was honest and told him it felt like years now, but I have no idea. He then berated me with questions I didn’t really understand like, what’s my faction, who’s my totem, who do I embody and when/where is my birth place. I answered as best I could and was only given looks of suspicion in return.
At the end of my interrogation he simply stated, So you’re…a basic mortal human? I could only reply with an embarrassing, yea. Oddo seemed surprised and turned toward Desiree who gave him an equal amount of confusion. He then bluntly asked how am I even alive or even sane in this place. I just shrugged and replied honestly, no fucking idea. I’ve never heard so much laughter since I’ve been here. Oddo, Desiree, Jim and Jon all teared up from laughter. Oddo dabbed me and pulled me in for a hug while still chuckling. It was so weird to have a normal person interaction in such a long time. I then asked about him. He was Oddo and then proceeded to give me such a long list of either titles, ranks and/or alignments to the point where we stood there for about 10 minutes before he finished. At heart though he was human, for the most part.
He introduced Desiree and told us that they met when she was sealed away in a decanter on a sunken ship that Oddo was excavating years ago and have been together ever since. He confirmed that she was a djinn like Siete said and that she was the last of the Jinn of Origin. One of the most powerful djinns. I only know their kind from the story of Aladdin and asked if that’s the kind they meant. I was given looks of confusion and had to explain the story more. There were some similarities and also that she had to grant him 3 desires into creation for her freedom originally, but only did one. Her freedom. Oddo and Desiree were together for 5 years without him ever making a wish. Instead he got to know her and enjoyed her company. They fell in love 2 years in and when they decided to be together forever he made a choice to make it her choice. He desired for her to be free.
Their lives weren’t easy however. They were hunted by men who knew of Desiree and her power. They’ve been on the run for years and wanted to be with others like themselves. Oddo hates humans and Desiree matched that hatred. I asked, then why are you even giving me the time of day now. He just replied with, you’re…different. I didn’t know if that was an insult or compliment. I told them I didn’t want to hold them up any longer and it was a pleasure to meet them. They began walking away towards the elevator while Jim and Jon collaborated their feelings on the couple. I was just happy to finally meet another human here, even if we’re clearly not cut from the same cloth. Siente began speaking again in my head and told me we need to leave the lobby now. She said not to look, but Winthorp has not taken his eyes off of us and he doesn’t look happy.
I told Jim and Jon that we should go check on Mila so as to not cause suspicion on our leave. They agreed and gave a slight nod to confirm. We began walking away when Winthorp called out to me and asked me to come over. I told him maybe later and that we’re going to check on our friend. I turned to leave only to turn to see Winthorp in front of me. We were somehow sitting in a small room I’ve never seen before. It looked like the old school integration rooms you see in black and white detective movies. This wasn’t good. Winthorp had a serious look and looked directly into my soul with those impossibly bright blue eyes. He then lightened up and asked how I’m liking my stay here so far. I told him it was good and then was asked why I’m keeping secrets then. My blood ran cold and I told him everyone has secrets.
He laughed and said that was a good answer, but then suddenly switched to bad cop. He slammed his hand in front of me and asked why we have been spying then. Sweat began dripping down my face. I told him I didn’t know what he was talking about. He switched to good cop and rubbed my cheek. He asked in a light tone if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and then he grabbed my face to look into his. He told me he doesn’t read minds, but he has ways of getting information. He then cupped his hand over my ear and I felt an intense pain with a loud white noise. He held the hair on my head so I couldn't move with his opposite hand and opened his other palm before me. The spider Siete put in my ear was standing in his palm. He asked again if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and the spider began floating. Her legs stretched out and one popped off. He made it so I could hear her scream.
I told him to stop and he asked again if I think he’s stupid. I yelled no again and he pulled out another from the spider. She was a child and I could hear her cry and scream in pain. He asked a third time and I switched my answer to hopefully get a better result. I said yes and then he set her on fire. A flame that burned, but didn’t cause fatal harm. A flame of pure pain and torture. Her screams were loud and filled with sadness and confusion. I begged him to stop, but he kept asking that same question over and over until she had no legs left. He then threw the burning legless spider in the corner. Her screams stopped when she had two legs left. I knew she was alive, but just broken in mind now. I told him I just wanted to leave and he grinned.
Honesty, is that so hard? Those words sent shivers down my spine. I told myself I can’t break. He asked what we were doing and I told him that I’m just trying to find a way out. The grin went back to a scowl. He touched his finger tip to mine and my right middle finger he touched began to burn. At first it dried up slowly and turned black. Then white and then began turning to dust from the tip down to the knuckle. He told me he doesn’t like torturing his tenants. He just wants us to live happily and comfortably. Winthorp then asked why I would want to leave. I have nothing out there and he knows that. I replied with a simple, fuck you.
He sighed in annoyance. I suddenly was completely frozen in place and was unmovable. He grabbed my left arm and began twisting. First my wrist snapped, then slowly up my forearm began breaking. After that he pushed my elbow opposite to where it’s supposed to bend and caused a compound fracture. I was then unfrozen and immediately cried out in pain. Winthorp grabbed the back of my neck so I could sit straight up and squeezed lightly. He told me he knows I’m up to something and to just tell him. If I tell him all this will be over, but I’d be putting my friends in danger worse than this. I answered with, you’re insane. He threw my head forward and it bounced off the table in front of me. I held my face with both hands and realized my arms are normal again.
Winthorp then grabbed the back of my head with his open palm gripping the back of my skull. He told me to spill my guts. Before I could say anything I started projectile vomiting hard. At first it was what I ate, then bile, blood and after my organs began coming out of my mouth as if I was still throwing them up. Every organ was ejected out of my mouth and he made sure I could feel it all. Every time I would start passing out from the pain he’d jerk my head and bring me back. My tongue was next to be forced out and then my teeth one by one uprooted themselves to join the rest on the table and floor. My skin began to melt off my flesh with my nose and ears. My skeleton from my neck down also decided to leave. It moved on its own and forced its way out and through my muscle tissue like it was trapped. Lastly he made my eyes pop out to view it all. This was nothing compared to when he made it all do it again in reverse and even slower.
Ever felt your skeleton crawl back into your flesh? I do. He made sure the nerves felt it all and that I wouldn’t lose consciousness for even a moment while my body slowly and painfully repaired itself. Once I was fully repaired he asked again what me and my friends were doing. I told him it was only me. He sat back in front of me and stared long and hard. I was shaking with fear as to what he was planning to do next. He reached out his index finger, placed it in the center of my forehead and pushed hard. When I turned back up I was no longer in the interrogation room. I was in my room. My childhood room. I looked down and saw my pajamas I haven’t worn since I was 6 years old. I felt wet and warm in my bed and began crying loudly. My parents entered my room to console me and told me I must’ve had a nightmare. I tried telling them about The Pandemonium Complex and Winthorp, but was too broken to explain and just babbled on like the crying child I was now.
They told me it was okay and that I could sleep in their room tonight. A few years went by and The Pandemonium Complex was nothing more than just a memory of a bad dream. When I was 9 I came back home from school to see my front door was open. I entered slowly and saw that my house was a wreck. Like a tornado or wild beast came through. I called out to my parents and siblings, but no one answered. I went to the hallway and saw a blood trail leading into each room. I passed my siblings rooms first and only saw blood leading to their closed closets. I was too afraid to open them. I went to my parents room and saw they were torn apart. Looks of horror were frozen on their faces. I heard something behind me coming from my siblings' rooms.
I ran to my parents window. I unlocked it and jumped out leaving my backpack behind. This isn’t right. I ran to the neighbors house and they called the police. I lived with my aunt and uncle after that. Then my grandparents. All met the same fate as my household. I was placed in foster care at 13. I began questioning my memories and what’s happening. None of this seemed right. At 14 I was adopted into an abusive household. My adopted mother only beat and yelled at me. My adopted father was worse and did unspeakable things. I ran away at the age of 16 and was homeless for a year. I then met the love of my life. Tanisha, she was perfect. Kind, loving, empathetic and an all around good person. We were together for 2 years before I met my best friend, Tate.
They helped me get back on track and made my past seem like a bad memory. I was 26 now and was married with 3 loving children. My best friend Tate had a family of his own and we were raising our kids together. Life was perfect. Then one day I came home from work. My front door was open and I knew it was over. I entered my home. My children were torn apart and thrown around my living room like ragdolls. I went into our room and saw that it was torn apart, but Tanisha wasn’t there. I ran out when I heard a familiar noise coming from the living room. I jumped out my window and started running towards Tate’s house. I kept trying to call my wife’s phone nonstop. No answer. When I got to Tate’s house I saw that his door was also open. I ran inside to see the same scene happen to his children.
I ran into Tate’s room and found him and…my wife. She must’ve tried running here when she found our kids, I thought. A small red light caught my attention in the debris. A camera that was recording. I played the tape back to see what happened. My wife was cheating on me with Tate. The camera was filled with different videos from long before today. I started the video from today to my dismay. They were in the middle of it when screams could be heard from the living room. I was so focused on what was going to happen that I didn’t notice the presence behind me. A scream broke the silence before I could see what entered the room and I turned to see Sarah, Tate’s wife screaming with horror at me. I tried calming her down and explain, but she had the police behind her already. I was arrested and was found guilty for murder.
They thought I killed them all because I found out they were cheating and also pinned the past murders on me since whatever kept happening is following me. I was thrown into a dark cold prison to live out my days in a hole. My days consisted of starving, being beaten and cold. I wanted to die. The death sentence was banned since I was a child, so all I could do was wait for death. One day, when I had given up, a few guards entered my room. I won’t say what happened, but it ended with them beating me nonstop until I couldn’t fight back. They didn’t stop beating me and when I was finally getting my wish of death I was sitting in a chair. I was in a small room with a man sitting across from me. A small bellhop wearing a straw boat hat. Winthorp. All my memories came flooding back. Memories of the past and now mixed and formed back into my hellish life.
Winthorp asked me again what we were planning. I looked him dead in the eye and just answered, I will kill you. A grin formed on his face again and he leaned in. How? He asked plain and simply. I knew I said too much again and just went silent. I don’t know how long I was there for. He made me live other hellish lives and tortured me over and over again in ways that would make the devil himself want to die. I never said another word. I could tell he was getting frustrated and was losing his cool. His methods started becoming sloppy and desperate. One of the benefits of being a basic mortal human is that we die very easily, so you could do whatever to us, but in the end they start getting very similar and I learned to get used to it. Once he realized he wasn’t getting anything out of me he threw me back into my room in the complex. I was thrown hard through the air and saw my furniture fly past me before I hit my wall hard. That’s when I just broke and just cried for hours.
I just needed to release. What I didn’t notice was Gunter was on the couch the whole time. He sat silently and just let me break. I think he knew I just needed to let it all out. I don’t know if he knew what I just went through, but he just started getting some fruit ready for me to eat when I’m ready. The small spider crawled out of my sleeve and ran to Siete under Gunter’s cornucopia. I slept for an unknown amount of time, but my body definitely needed it. When I woke up, I ate and Gunter asked me if I wanted to talk. I just asked how long I had been gone. He said Jim, Jon and I left just a few minutes before I was suddenly flying through my room from out of nowhere. He asked more directly as to what happened. I didn’t give him all the details, but now my mind is set. Winthorp and The Pandemonium Complex need to die.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
It feels like it’s already been weeks since Mila was forced to fight to the death. I can’t tell time here anymore. I just sleep when I need to with no sense of time. At first it messed with my head for a while and I think I went a little insane for a moment, but once you realize that you don’t need it because you don’t need a schedule anymore. It can make you a lot more focused on the now. Gunter has been staying with Mila and barely stays in his own room anymore. We don’t know if she got the previous tenants room or she got hers upgraded since she won the battle against Níðhöggr, but Mila’s room is an entire mountain range. Gunter has been cultivating at the base of the mountains and taking care of Mila. He really loved her cherry blossom trees and spider lilies. I stayed with them for a few days and loved it too after a while. Mila chose a cave in the mountains that she said would work best for her recovery.
Mila’s biology works like a snake’s in a tank and can grow as big as her surroundings. Due to her limited space and food supply in her room that she was sealed in, she was small compared to her full potential. Her new demon noh mask was hard to get used to, but I kind of like it now. It looks pretty bad ass with the horns and tusks. The human skin color it chose wouldn’t be my first choice however. Her new dark red exoskeleton definitely makes up for that though. She doesn’t look anything like the Mila we first met, but we love her no matter how she looks. Pushed to her limits she could wrap an entire mountain if she wanted to or be as small as several inches.
Gunter as well has impressed me. For a small 5 foot something man he’s pretty fast and strong. On his own he can track up the 7,000 foot mountains to get to Mila and back in a little under an hour. I’ve gone with him a few times. We’d track normally and talk for a few hours and he’ll either carry me with him, which still takes him a few hours, or just do the rest alone. Jim, Jon, Siete and her many children visit too. We have meetings to discuss the plan while the kids play in Gunter’s forest that he filled with insects and fruit groves. Gunter also spent a few hours building me a cabin with one of his picks. It was actually really good and the furniture that he built is extremely comfortable.
We went over some ideas and shared what all of us can do during our meeting. I feel like an average Joe sitting among superheroes when I heard what just their species alone can do, plus Gunter, Mila and Jim have some unique talents. When they asked what I can do I decided to lighten the mood by doing the removable thumb trick. No one thought it was funny and we waisted almost an hour explaining to Gunter it wasn’t real. He still thinks I can remove my limbs at will, but choose not to. First thing we needed to do was find Baba Yaga. The Host’s hive mind knows of Klaus and has some memories of him, but we have no idea where he is or if he has a room. Baba Yaga might have some insight and Gunter thinks she should be our main priority. I still think there’s more to what he’s willing to tell us.
Gunter says she was never a tenant as far as he knows and knew her way before he lived here. She practices the arts of the witches, enchantresses, sorceresses and necromancers to name a few. She also spends most of her time in her cabin. Her and her cabin are similar to Withorp and the complex as in wherever it is, she is. If her cabin is somehow either inside or trapped in The Pandemonium Complex then maybe we can find it. Gunter knows what her door looks like if they happen to come across it, but Gunter can’t just run around the complex wildly. One he might catch unwanted attention and none of us know how big this place is if we just search everywhere. Siete said she can send her children, but it’ll take an unknown amount of time for them to come back and tell her what every door looks like and who knows if it’ll still be there by the time they get there. She does have another idea though.
Her hive mind is strong when the spiders are many, but even stronger when there’s less. With less it’ll be like she can see through every one of her children at once. She definitely hates the idea, but it may be our only one. We gave them the best days of their lives as best we could. A few days after that meeting Siete showed up at the cabin Gunter built without The Host and with her children riding on her. There looked to be about 500-600 left from her thousands. We didn’t ask or pry what she had to do, so we carried on with our plan. Siete told us she can also connect us to The Host hive if we wanted to so we can all at least instantly communicate with each other. We won’t have visuals like her, but we can hear her thoughts immediately like a walkie talkie. To be honest I think we all agreed out of respect. She killed her own children for our sake, the least we could do is be there for her.
The smallest spiders from her cluster with long thin legs crawled up each of us and as much as we hated it. We had to let them crawl into our ear canal. We all shuddered hard and tried our best to let them do their job. I can’t speak for the others, but imagine a wild tickle in your ear that sounds like wind blowing hard directly in. Suddenly an intense pain in my ear drum started making it ring loud and hard. Once the ringing started to fade I kept hearing a beautiful woman’s voice saying, hello, softly over and over again. I looked over at Siete, who was standing on the dining room table and asked if that was her. She bounced a little while I could hear that voice saying yes happily. Even Jon had to comment how beautiful she sounded. Definitely a mother’s voice if I’ve ever heard one, which made us hate what we had to make her do so much more.
We played around with our new voiceless communication and had to tune it to not hear every thought. Didn’t think that would be a problem until all of us could hear Jon’s intrusive thoughts while he was staring at Jim. Ever seen a hulking big green apeman turn bright red? It is hilarious, but now I have images in my head that I’m afraid will never go away. Since Siete is now also without The Host she needs a new spot. We decided to keep her under Gunter’s cornucopia. We enjoyed our last day of peace, but now we had to start our search. Siete sent out her children and we listened intently to her kids updates of anything out of the ordinary. Gunter and Siete focused to show Siete what door they’re looking for. So far no door, but we heard a couple of interesting sightings.
The Wisps are back at their pranks again, little light fairies that can cast visual illusions that have been tricking tenants into entering unlocked rooms. Gulp, the bottomless traveling portal, ate the zombie horde, thankfully now I won’t get cramped in the elevator again when they were up to 13 zombies. Her was seen consuming that shape shifting lizardman who loved pretending to be politicians, near my room and tried desperately holding on to a door with chains. Girin and Kuba, the giant black bear forest spirit are fighting in the hallway near Gunter’s room because neither would move so the other could pass again. Adrenepae, the wife of Apollo who ate his heart, looks like she finally can control her avatar of fire form now and is roaming the hallways.Tate the warlock is stalking Beta, the techno organic virus, who has a new female host body; weird little creep. What caught our attention the most was the new tenant that entered the lobby.
He was a darker skinned man with long dreads that had metal links. He wore a long green coat with a satchel. The big headphones and reflective sunglasses were also a nice touch. Me, Jim and Jon went to the lobby to see. We are pretty nosy and we might as well kill some time people watching. Us breaking routine and avoiding Winthorp might also cause suspicion. We have people checking in all the time, but this guy was different as the complex was seemingly treating him as a long time tenant. The lobby works like a one way mirror and with new potential tenants it hides us and the current theme of the lobby before they get approved. I’ve only seen it a few times, but when someone new enters, to us they’re surrounded by a clear cube that limits what they can see when they’re inside. While inside they can only see what the complex wants them to see and nothing as far as I know can enter or leave this pocket dimension box.
With this man however there is no box. The complex didn’t feel the need to hide us or his surroundings for some odd reason. He was ignoring it all though as if he’s been here. He even walked right past Agatha & Mrs. Donahue, seemingly two old ladies that are always playing chess in the lobby and try speaking with anyone in a gentle neighborly tone. You must never speak to them however. They are a Lich and a Fae, but not a nice one like Gunter. The longer you talk to them the more they ruin and steal your life. I was lucky enough to have Jim & Jon stop me before I could reply to their hellos, their friendly faces immediately turned to anger when their meal was not taking the bait. The man paid them no mind and walked right past when they tried waving him down. He was speaking to Winthorp who also was paying the man special attention.
He kept referring to him as they and them when speaking. Winthorp also was standing at full attention before the man walked up. I’ve never seen him so eager to greet a potential new tenant. When it came down to signing the leger he did so without saying a word, but when he finished Winthorp said all new tenants must sign. We didn’t understand at first, when suddenly the man held out his arm and pulled up his sleeve. His arm was covered in a mix of branded and ink tattoos of symbols I’ve never seen before. His closed right palm began to glow a color I’ve never seen before and probably was never meant to be seen by human eyes. He opened his palm and a flash bright enough to blind half the lobby engulfed the room. When we looked back after shielding our eyes there was now a woman with him.
She had turquoise colored skin, long black hair, a beautiful purple choli that had modern accessories and a satchel bag that matched the man’s. She also signed the ledger and was greeted with as much enthusiasm the man was getting by Winthorp. I asked Jim and Jon if they knew who or what they were, but they had no idea. I then asked my internal host Siente if she’s seeing this. A familiar ringing began in my ear and I could hear her voice once again. This had her curiosity immediately when the first words I heard are, interesting. Siente has no knowledge of the man, but the woman is theorized to be a djinn and an old one at that. Siente said that physical djinns are extremely rare and are the most powerful kind, but what caught Siente’s attention was that she wasn’t bound.
Djinns are normally adorned with bright jewelry to symbolize that they are bound to the human world and must obey the law of the bound djinns when on the mortal plain. This djinn was somehow free and in full control which can normally only be done if wished to be free by the master. They also usually leave once freed to return to the realm of the untamed elements, like a fish running back to water. Once checked in we saw Winthorp provide them with what looked like a metal jewelry box that the man put in his satchel. They started walking towards the elevator when I decided to introduce myself. The man stopped first and raised his brow behind those shades, but the djinn stood between us and signaled me to halt with her outstretched arm. Or at least that’s what I thought.
I was thrown backwards by an unseen force, but was luckily caught by Jim. Jon stood in front and began to growl hard in anger. Jon’s size began to increase steadily with his rage and the air around us began getting hotter. I saw his gray fur begin to tense with his flex of dominance and I yelled for him to calm down. Jim put me down and rested his hand on Jon’s shoulder. Jon began to almost instantly relax. Jim stepped in front and apologized, but the woman held her hand back up as a warning to not approach. The man this time relaxed her by resting his hand on the top of her forearm. She looked surprised and shocked by this. The man walked up to Jim, took off his glasses and moved his headphones to around his neck. He looked Jim up and down like he was inspecting him. The man’s eyes were a bright mix of blue and green.
The man asked what tribe he is from and Jim answered. The 13th Wukong of the Nán Providence, but has been Omega ranked in the Tauá-Miri clan for a few decades now. He then looked over to Jon and asked him. Jon only replied with, nikto, and both Jon and the man averted their gaze when the man apologized. The man then looked towards me and apologized for his girlfriend's defensive behavior. We shook hands and greeted each other properly. The man’s name was Oddo and his girlfriend was Desiree. She still watched me with hard suspicious looks while we talked. The man asked me what I was. I told him I’m just human, he stared for a while. He then looked me up and down like he did with Jim and asked how long I’ve lived here. I was honest and told him it felt like years now, but I have no idea. He then berated me with questions I didn’t really understand like, what’s my faction, who’s my totem, who do I embody and when/where is my birth place. I answered as best I could and was only given looks of suspicion in return.
At the end of my interrogation he simply stated, So you’re…a basic mortal human? I could only reply with an embarrassing, yea. Oddo seemed surprised and turned toward Desiree who gave him an equal amount of confusion. He then bluntly asked how am I even alive or even sane in this place. I just shrugged and replied honestly, no fucking idea. I’ve never heard so much laughter since I’ve been here. Oddo, Desiree, Jim and Jon all teared up from laughter. Oddo dabbed me and pulled me in for a hug while still chuckling. It was so weird to have a normal person interaction in such a long time. I then asked about him. He was Oddo and then proceeded to give me such a long list of either titles, ranks and/or alignments to the point where we stood there for about 10 minutes before he finished. At heart though he was human, for the most part.
He introduced Desiree and told us that they met when she was sealed away in a decanter on a sunken ship that Oddo was excavating years ago and have been together ever since. He confirmed that she was a djinn like Siete said and that she was the last of the Jinn of Origin. One of the most powerful djinns. I only know their kind from the story of Aladdin and asked if that’s the kind they meant. I was given looks of confusion and had to explain the story more. There were some similarities and also that she had to grant him 3 desires into creation for her freedom originally, but only did one. Her freedom. Oddo and Desiree were together for 5 years without him ever making a wish. Instead he got to know her and enjoyed her company. They fell in love 2 years in and when they decided to be together forever he made a choice to make it her choice. He desired for her to be free.
Their lives weren’t easy however. They were hunted by men who knew of Desiree and her power. They’ve been on the run for years and wanted to be with others like themselves. Oddo hates humans and Desiree matched that hatred. I asked, then why are you even giving me the time of day now. He just replied with, you’re…different. I didn’t know if that was an insult or compliment. I told them I didn’t want to hold them up any longer and it was a pleasure to meet them. They began walking away towards the elevator while Jim and Jon collaborated their feelings on the couple. I was just happy to finally meet another human here, even if we’re clearly not cut from the same cloth. Siente began speaking again in my head and told me we need to leave the lobby now. She said not to look, but Winthorp has not taken his eyes off of us and he doesn’t look happy.
I told Jim and Jon that we should go check on Mila so as to not cause suspicion on our leave. They agreed and gave a slight nod to confirm. We began walking away when Winthorp called out to me and asked me to come over. I told him maybe later and that we’re going to check on our friend. I turned to leave only to turn to see Winthorp in front of me. We were somehow sitting in a small room I’ve never seen before. It looked like the old school integration rooms you see in black and white detective movies. This wasn’t good. Winthorp had a serious look and looked directly into my soul with those impossibly bright blue eyes. He then lightened up and asked how I’m liking my stay here so far. I told him it was good and then was asked why I’m keeping secrets then. My blood ran cold and I told him everyone has secrets.
He laughed and said that was a good answer, but then suddenly switched to bad cop. He slammed his hand in front of me and asked why we have been spying then. Sweat began dripping down my face. I told him I didn’t know what he was talking about. He switched to good cop and rubbed my cheek. He asked in a light tone if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and then he grabbed my face to look into his. He told me he doesn’t read minds, but he has ways of getting information. He then cupped his hand over my ear and I felt an intense pain with a loud white noise. He held the hair on my head so I couldn't move with his opposite hand and opened his other palm before me. The spider Siete put in my ear was standing in his palm. He asked again if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and the spider began floating. Her legs stretched out and one popped off. He made it so I could hear her scream.
I told him to stop and he asked again if I think he’s stupid. I yelled no again and he pulled out another from the spider. She was a child and I could hear her cry and scream in pain. He asked a third time and I switched my answer to hopefully get a better result. I said yes and then he set her on fire. A flame that burned, but didn’t cause fatal harm. A flame of pure pain and torture. Her screams were loud and filled with sadness and confusion. I begged him to stop, but he kept asking that same question over and over until she had no legs left. He then threw the burning legless spider in the corner. Her screams stopped when she had two legs left. I knew she was alive, but just broken in mind now. I told him I just wanted to leave and he grinned.
Honesty, is that so hard? Those words sent shivers down my spine. I told myself I can’t break. He asked what we were doing and I told him that I’m just trying to find a way out. The grin went back to a scowl. He touched his finger tip to mine and my right middle finger he touched began to burn. At first it dried up slowly and turned black. Then white and then began turning to dust from the tip down to the knuckle. He told me he doesn’t like torturing his tenants. He just wants us to live happily and comfortably. Winthorp then asked why I would want to leave. I have nothing out there and he knows that. I replied with a simple, fuck you.
He sighed in annoyance. I suddenly was completely frozen in place and was unmovable. He grabbed my left arm and began twisting. First my wrist snapped, then slowly up my forearm began breaking. After that he pushed my elbow opposite to where it’s supposed to bend and caused a compound fracture. I was then unfrozen and immediately cried out in pain. Winthorp grabbed the back of my neck so I could sit straight up and squeezed lightly. He told me he knows I’m up to something and to just tell him. If I tell him all this will be over, but I’d be putting my friends in danger worse than this. I answered with, you’re insane. He threw my head forward and it bounced off the table in front of me. I held my face with both hands and realized my arms are normal again.
Winthorp then grabbed the back of my head with his open palm gripping the back of my skull. He told me to spill my guts. Before I could say anything I started projectile vomiting hard. At first it was what I ate, then bile, blood and after my organs began coming out of my mouth as if I was still throwing them up. Every organ was ejected out of my mouth and he made sure I could feel it all. Every time I would start passing out from the pain he’d jerk my head and bring me back. My tongue was next to be forced out and then my teeth one by one uprooted themselves to join the rest on the table and floor. My skin began to melt off my flesh with my nose and ears. My skeleton from my neck down also decided to leave. It moved on its own and forced its way out and through my muscle tissue like it was trapped. Lastly he made my eyes pop out to view it all. This was nothing compared to when he made it all do it again in reverse and even slower.
Ever felt your skeleton crawl back into your flesh? I do. He made sure the nerves felt it all and that I wouldn’t lose consciousness for even a moment while my body slowly and painfully repaired itself. Once I was fully repaired he asked again what me and my friends were doing. I told him it was only me. He sat back in front of me and stared long and hard. I was shaking with fear as to what he was planning to do next. He reached out his index finger, placed it in the center of my forehead and pushed hard. When I turned back up I was no longer in the interrogation room. I was in my room. My childhood room. I looked down and saw my pajamas I haven’t worn since I was 6 years old. I felt wet and warm in my bed and began crying loudly. My parents entered my room to console me and told me I must’ve had a nightmare. I tried telling them about The Pandemonium Complex and Winthorp, but was too broken to explain and just babbled on like the crying child I was now.
They told me it was okay and that I could sleep in their room tonight. A few years went by and The Pandemonium Complex was nothing more than just a memory of a bad dream. When I was 9 I came back home from school to see my front door was open. I entered slowly and saw that my house was a wreck. Like a tornado or wild beast came through. I called out to my parents and siblings, but no one answered. I went to the hallway and saw a blood trail leading into each room. I passed my siblings rooms first and only saw blood leading to their closed closets. I was too afraid to open them. I went to my parents room and saw they were torn apart. Looks of horror were frozen on their faces. I heard something behind me coming from my siblings' rooms.
I ran to my parents window. I unlocked it and jumped out leaving my backpack behind. This isn’t right. I ran to the neighbors house and they called the police. I lived with my aunt and uncle after that. Then my grandparents. All met the same fate as my household. I was placed in foster care at 13. I began questioning my memories and what’s happening. None of this seemed right. At 14 I was adopted into an abusive household. My adopted mother only beat and yelled at me. My adopted father was worse and did unspeakable things. I ran away at the age of 16 and was homeless for a year. I then met the love of my life. Tanisha, she was perfect. Kind, loving, empathetic and an all around good person. We were together for 2 years before I met my best friend, Tate.
They helped me get back on track and made my past seem like a bad memory. I was 26 now and was married with 3 loving children. My best friend Tate had a family of his own and we were raising our kids together. Life was perfect. Then one day I came home from work. My front door was open and I knew it was over. I entered my home. My children were torn apart and thrown around my living room like ragdolls. I went into our room and saw that it was torn apart, but Tanisha wasn’t there. I ran out when I heard a familiar noise coming from the living room. I jumped out my window and started running towards Tate’s house. I kept trying to call my wife’s phone nonstop. No answer. When I got to Tate’s house I saw that his door was also open. I ran inside to see the same scene happen to his children.
I ran into Tate’s room and found him and…my wife. She must’ve tried running here when she found our kids, I thought. A small red light caught my attention in the debris. A camera that was recording. I played the tape back to see what happened. My wife was cheating on me with Tate. The camera was filled with different videos from long before today. I started the video from today to my dismay. They were in the middle of it when screams could be heard from the living room. I was so focused on what was going to happen that I didn’t notice the presence behind me. A scream broke the silence before I could see what entered the room and I turned to see Sarah, Tate’s wife screaming with horror at me. I tried calming her down and explain, but she had the police behind her already. I was arrested and was found guilty for murder.
They thought I killed them all because I found out they were cheating and also pinned the past murders on me since whatever kept happening is following me. I was thrown into a dark cold prison to live out my days in a hole. My days consisted of starving, being beaten and cold. I wanted to die. The death sentence was banned since I was a child, so all I could do was wait for death. One day, when I had given up, a few guards entered my room. I won’t say what happened, but it ended with them beating me nonstop until I couldn’t fight back. They didn’t stop beating me and when I was finally getting my wish of death I was sitting in a chair. I was in a small room with a man sitting across from me. A small bellhop wearing a straw boat hat. Winthorp. All my memories came flooding back. Memories of the past and now mixed and formed back into my hellish life.
Winthorp asked me again what we were planning. I looked him dead in the eye and just answered, I will kill you. A grin formed on his face again and he leaned in. How? He asked plain and simply. I knew I said too much again and just went silent. I don’t know how long I was there for. He made me live other hellish lives and tortured me over and over again in ways that would make the devil himself want to die. I never said another word. I could tell he was getting frustrated and was losing his cool. His methods started becoming sloppy and desperate. One of the benefits of being a basic mortal human is that we die very easily, so you could do whatever to us, but in the end they start getting very similar and I learned to get used to it. Once he realized he wasn’t getting anything out of me he threw me back into my room in the complex. I was thrown hard through the air and saw my furniture fly past me before I hit my wall hard. That’s when I just broke and just cried for hours.
I just needed to release. What I didn’t notice was Gunter was on the couch the whole time. He sat silently and just let me break. I think he knew I just needed to let it all out. I don’t know if he knew what I just went through, but he just started getting some fruit ready for me to eat when I’m ready. The small spider crawled out of my sleeve and ran to Siete under Gunter’s cornucopia. I slept for an unknown amount of time, but my body definitely needed it. When I woke up, I ate and Gunter asked me if I wanted to talk. I just asked how long I had been gone. He said Jim, Jon and I left just a few minutes before I was suddenly flying through my room from out of nowhere. He asked more directly as to what happened. I didn’t give him all the details, but now my mind is set. Winthorp and The Pandemonium Complex need to die.

First time playing after the update, shot a doe near trappers cabin and track it while being followed by a wolf or two, end up near unnamed pond where a bear is hanging out. Evade the bear while still following deer that finally lays down to die…IN A TREE. I can see the feet and the snout and the pixel shows up but the frickin thing is unharvestable. Did I mention at this point I’m hypothermic and condition plummeting, I back track to the elevated blind at the pond and headshot the bear with the revolver while shivering like crazy.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
It feels like it’s already been weeks since Mila was forced to fight to the death. I can’t tell time here anymore. I just sleep when I need to with no sense of time. At first it messed with my head for a while and I think I went a little insane for a moment, but once you realize that you don’t need it because you don’t need a schedule anymore. It can make you a lot more focused on the now. Gunter has been staying with Mila and barely stays in his own room anymore. We don’t know if she got the previous tenants room or she got hers upgraded since she won the battle against Níðhöggr, but Mila’s room is an entire mountain range. Gunter has been cultivating at the base of the mountains and taking care of Mila. He really loved her cherry blossom trees and spider lilies. I stayed with them for a few days and loved it too after a while. Mila chose a cave in the mountains that she said would work best for her recovery.
Mila’s biology works like a snake’s in a tank and can grow as big as her surroundings. Due to her limited space and food supply in her room that she was sealed in, she was small compared to her full potential. Her new demon noh mask was hard to get used to, but I kind of like it now. It looks pretty bad ass with the horns and tusks. The human skin color it chose wouldn’t be my first choice however. Her new dark red exoskeleton definitely makes up for that though. She doesn’t look anything like the Mila we first met, but we love her no matter how she looks. Pushed to her limits she could wrap an entire mountain if she wanted to or be as small as several inches.
Gunter as well has impressed me. For a small 5 foot something man he’s pretty fast and strong. On his own he can track up the 7,000 foot mountains to get to Mila and back in a little under an hour. I’ve gone with him a few times. We’d track normally and talk for a few hours and he’ll either carry me with him, which still takes him a few hours, or just do the rest alone. Jim, Jon, Siete and her many children visit too. We have meetings to discuss the plan while the kids play in Gunter’s forest that he filled with insects and fruit groves. Gunter also spent a few hours building me a cabin with one of his picks. It was actually really good and the furniture that he built is extremely comfortable.
We went over some ideas and shared what all of us can do during our meeting. I feel like an average Joe sitting among superheroes when I heard what just their species alone can do, plus Gunter, Mila and Jim have some unique talents. When they asked what I can do I decided to lighten the mood by doing the removable thumb trick. No one thought it was funny and we waisted almost an hour explaining to Gunter it wasn’t real. He still thinks I can remove my limbs at will, but choose not to. First thing we needed to do was find Baba Yaga. The Host’s hive mind knows of Klaus and has some memories of him, but we have no idea where he is or if he has a room. Baba Yaga might have some insight and Gunter thinks she should be our main priority. I still think there’s more to what he’s willing to tell us.
Gunter says she was never a tenant as far as he knows and knew her way before he lived here. She practices the arts of the witches, enchantresses, sorceresses and necromancers to name a few. She also spends most of her time in her cabin. Her and her cabin are similar to Withorp and the complex as in wherever it is, she is. If her cabin is somehow either inside or trapped in The Pandemonium Complex then maybe we can find it. Gunter knows what her door looks like if they happen to come across it, but Gunter can’t just run around the complex wildly. One he might catch unwanted attention and none of us know how big this place is if we just search everywhere. Siete said she can send her children, but it’ll take an unknown amount of time for them to come back and tell her what every door looks like and who knows if it’ll still be there by the time they get there. She does have another idea though.
Her hive mind is strong when the spiders are many, but even stronger when there’s less. With less it’ll be like she can see through every one of her children at once. She definitely hates the idea, but it may be our only one. We gave them the best days of their lives as best we could. A few days after that meeting Siete showed up at the cabin Gunter built without The Host and with her children riding on her. There looked to be about 500-600 left from her thousands. We didn’t ask or pry what she had to do, so we carried on with our plan. Siete told us she can also connect us to The Host hive if we wanted to so we can all at least instantly communicate with each other. We won’t have visuals like her, but we can hear her thoughts immediately like a walkie talkie. To be honest I think we all agreed out of respect. She killed her own children for our sake, the least we could do is be there for her.
The smallest spiders from her cluster with long thin legs crawled up each of us and as much as we hated it. We had to let them crawl into our ear canal. We all shuddered hard and tried our best to let them do their job. I can’t speak for the others, but imagine a wild tickle in your ear that sounds like wind blowing hard directly in. Suddenly an intense pain in my ear drum started making it ring loud and hard. Once the ringing started to fade I kept hearing a beautiful woman’s voice saying, hello, softly over and over again. I looked over at Siete, who was standing on the dining room table and asked if that was her. She bounced a little while I could hear that voice saying yes happily. Even Jon had to comment how beautiful she sounded. Definitely a mother’s voice if I’ve ever heard one, which made us hate what we had to make her do so much more.
We played around with our new voiceless communication and had to tune it to not hear every thought. Didn’t think that would be a problem until all of us could hear Jon’s intrusive thoughts while he was staring at Jim. Ever seen a hulking big green apeman turn bright red? It is hilarious, but now I have images in my head that I’m afraid will never go away. Since Siete is now also without The Host she needs a new spot. We decided to keep her under Gunter’s cornucopia. We enjoyed our last day of peace, but now we had to start our search. Siete sent out her children and we listened intently to her kids updates of anything out of the ordinary. Gunter and Siete focused to show Siete what door they’re looking for. So far no door, but we heard a couple of interesting sightings.
The Wisps are back at their pranks again, little light fairies that can cast visual illusions that have been tricking tenants into entering unlocked rooms. Gulp, the bottomless traveling portal, ate the zombie horde, thankfully now I won’t get cramped in the elevator again when they were up to 13 zombies. Her was seen consuming that shape shifting lizardman who loved pretending to be politicians, near my room and tried desperately holding on to a door with chains. Girin and Kuba, the giant black bear forest spirit are fighting in the hallway near Gunter’s room because neither would move so the other could pass again. Adrenepae, the wife of Apollo who ate his heart, looks like she finally can control her avatar of fire form now and is roaming the hallways.Tate the warlock is stalking Beta, the techno organic virus, who has a new female host body; weird little creep. What caught our attention the most was the new tenant that entered the lobby.
He was a darker skinned man with long dreads that had metal links. He wore a long green coat with a satchel. The big headphones and reflective sunglasses were also a nice touch. Me, Jim and Jon went to the lobby to see. We are pretty nosy and we might as well kill some time people watching. Us breaking routine and avoiding Winthorp might also cause suspicion. We have people checking in all the time, but this guy was different as the complex was seemingly treating him as a long time tenant. The lobby works like a one way mirror and with new potential tenants it hides us and the current theme of the lobby before they get approved. I’ve only seen it a few times, but when someone new enters, to us they’re surrounded by a clear cube that limits what they can see when they’re inside. While inside they can only see what the complex wants them to see and nothing as far as I know can enter or leave this pocket dimension box.
With this man however there is no box. The complex didn’t feel the need to hide us or his surroundings for some odd reason. He was ignoring it all though as if he’s been here. He even walked right past Agatha & Mrs. Donahue, seemingly two old ladies that are always playing chess in the lobby and try speaking with anyone in a gentle neighborly tone. You must never speak to them however. They are a Lich and a Fae, but not a nice one like Gunter. The longer you talk to them the more they ruin and steal your life. I was lucky enough to have Jim & Jon stop me before I could reply to their hellos, their friendly faces immediately turned to anger when their meal was not taking the bait. The man paid them no mind and walked right past when they tried waving him down. He was speaking to Winthorp who also was paying the man special attention.
He kept referring to him as they and them when speaking. Winthorp also was standing at full attention before the man walked up. I’ve never seen him so eager to greet a potential new tenant. When it came down to signing the leger he did so without saying a word, but when he finished Winthorp said all new tenants must sign. We didn’t understand at first, when suddenly the man held out his arm and pulled up his sleeve. His arm was covered in a mix of branded and ink tattoos of symbols I’ve never seen before. His closed right palm began to glow a color I’ve never seen before and probably was never meant to be seen by human eyes. He opened his palm and a flash bright enough to blind half the lobby engulfed the room. When we looked back after shielding our eyes there was now a woman with him.
She had turquoise colored skin, long black hair, a beautiful purple choli that had modern accessories and a satchel bag that matched the man’s. She also signed the ledger and was greeted with as much enthusiasm the man was getting by Winthorp. I asked Jim and Jon if they knew who or what they were, but they had no idea. I then asked my internal host Siente if she’s seeing this. A familiar ringing began in my ear and I could hear her voice once again. This had her curiosity immediately when the first words I heard are, interesting. Siente has no knowledge of the man, but the woman is theorized to be a djinn and an old one at that. Siente said that physical djinns are extremely rare and are the most powerful kind, but what caught Siente’s attention was that she wasn’t bound.
Djinns are normally adorned with bright jewelry to symbolize that they are bound to the human world and must obey the law of the bound djinns when on the mortal plain. This djinn was somehow free and in full control which can normally only be done if wished to be free by the master. They also usually leave once freed to return to the realm of the untamed elements, like a fish running back to water. Once checked in we saw Winthorp provide them with what looked like a metal jewelry box that the man put in his satchel. They started walking towards the elevator when I decided to introduce myself. The man stopped first and raised his brow behind those shades, but the djinn stood between us and signaled me to halt with her outstretched arm. Or at least that’s what I thought.
I was thrown backwards by an unseen force, but was luckily caught by Jim. Jon stood in front and began to growl hard in anger. Jon’s size began to increase steadily with his rage and the air around us began getting hotter. I saw his gray fur begin to tense with his flex of dominance and I yelled for him to calm down. Jim put me down and rested his hand on Jon’s shoulder. Jon began to almost instantly relax. Jim stepped in front and apologized, but the woman held her hand back up as a warning to not approach. The man this time relaxed her by resting his hand on the top of her forearm. She looked surprised and shocked by this. The man walked up to Jim, took off his glasses and moved his headphones to around his neck. He looked Jim up and down like he was inspecting him. The man’s eyes were a bright mix of blue and green.
The man asked what tribe he is from and Jim answered. The 13th Wukong of the Nán Providence, but has been Omega ranked in the Tauá-Miri clan for a few decades now. He then looked over to Jon and asked him. Jon only replied with, nikto, and both Jon and the man averted their gaze when the man apologized. The man then looked towards me and apologized for his girlfriend's defensive behavior. We shook hands and greeted each other properly. The man’s name was Oddo and his girlfriend was Desiree. She still watched me with hard suspicious looks while we talked. The man asked me what I was. I told him I’m just human, he stared for a while. He then looked me up and down like he did with Jim and asked how long I’ve lived here. I was honest and told him it felt like years now, but I have no idea. He then berated me with questions I didn’t really understand like, what’s my faction, who’s my totem, who do I embody and when/where is my birth place. I answered as best I could and was only given looks of suspicion in return.
At the end of my interrogation he simply stated, So you’re…a basic mortal human? I could only reply with an embarrassing, yea. Oddo seemed surprised and turned toward Desiree who gave him an equal amount of confusion. He then bluntly asked how am I even alive or even sane in this place. I just shrugged and replied honestly, no fucking idea. I’ve never heard so much laughter since I’ve been here. Oddo, Desiree, Jim and Jon all teared up from laughter. Oddo dabbed me and pulled me in for a hug while still chuckling. It was so weird to have a normal person interaction in such a long time. I then asked about him. He was Oddo and then proceeded to give me such a long list of either titles, ranks and/or alignments to the point where we stood there for about 10 minutes before he finished. At heart though he was human, for the most part.
He introduced Desiree and told us that they met when she was sealed away in a decanter on a sunken ship that Oddo was excavating years ago and have been together ever since. He confirmed that she was a djinn like Siete said and that she was the last of the Jinn of Origin. One of the most powerful djinns. I only know their kind from the story of Aladdin and asked if that’s the kind they meant. I was given looks of confusion and had to explain the story more. There were some similarities and also that she had to grant him 3 desires into creation for her freedom originally, but only did one. Her freedom. Oddo and Desiree were together for 5 years without him ever making a wish. Instead he got to know her and enjoyed her company. They fell in love 2 years in and when they decided to be together forever he made a choice to make it her choice. He desired for her to be free.
Their lives weren’t easy however. They were hunted by men who knew of Desiree and her power. They’ve been on the run for years and wanted to be with others like themselves. Oddo hates humans and Desiree matched that hatred. I asked, then why are you even giving me the time of day now. He just replied with, you’re…different. I didn’t know if that was an insult or compliment. I told them I didn’t want to hold them up any longer and it was a pleasure to meet them. They began walking away towards the elevator while Jim and Jon collaborated their feelings on the couple. I was just happy to finally meet another human here, even if we’re clearly not cut from the same cloth. Siente began speaking again in my head and told me we need to leave the lobby now. She said not to look, but Winthorp has not taken his eyes off of us and he doesn’t look happy.
I told Jim and Jon that we should go check on Mila so as to not cause suspicion on our leave. They agreed and gave a slight nod to confirm. We began walking away when Winthorp called out to me and asked me to come over. I told him maybe later and that we’re going to check on our friend. I turned to leave only to turn to see Winthorp in front of me. We were somehow sitting in a small room I’ve never seen before. It looked like the old school integration rooms you see in black and white detective movies. This wasn’t good. Winthorp had a serious look and looked directly into my soul with those impossibly bright blue eyes. He then lightened up and asked how I’m liking my stay here so far. I told him it was good and then was asked why I’m keeping secrets then. My blood ran cold and I told him everyone has secrets.
He laughed and said that was a good answer, but then suddenly switched to bad cop. He slammed his hand in front of me and asked why we have been spying then. Sweat began dripping down my face. I told him I didn’t know what he was talking about. He switched to good cop and rubbed my cheek. He asked in a light tone if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and then he grabbed my face to look into his. He told me he doesn’t read minds, but he has ways of getting information. He then cupped his hand over my ear and I felt an intense pain with a loud white noise. He held the hair on my head so I couldn't move with his opposite hand and opened his other palm before me. The spider Siete put in my ear was standing in his palm. He asked again if I think he’s stupid. I told him no and the spider began floating. Her legs stretched out and one popped off. He made it so I could hear her scream.
I told him to stop and he asked again if I think he’s stupid. I yelled no again and he pulled out another from the spider. She was a child and I could hear her cry and scream in pain. He asked a third time and I switched my answer to hopefully get a better result. I said yes and then he set her on fire. A flame that burned, but didn’t cause fatal harm. A flame of pure pain and torture. Her screams were loud and filled with sadness and confusion. I begged him to stop, but he kept asking that same question over and over until she had no legs left. He then threw the burning legless spider in the corner. Her screams stopped when she had two legs left. I knew she was alive, but just broken in mind now. I told him I just wanted to leave and he grinned.
Honesty, is that so hard? Those words sent shivers down my spine. I told myself I can’t break. He asked what we were doing and I told him that I’m just trying to find a way out. The grin went back to a scowl. He touched his finger tip to mine and my right middle finger he touched began to burn. At first it dried up slowly and turned black. Then white and then began turning to dust from the tip down to the knuckle. He told me he doesn’t like torturing his tenants. He just wants us to live happily and comfortably. Winthorp then asked why I would want to leave. I have nothing out there and he knows that. I replied with a simple, fuck you.
He sighed in annoyance. I suddenly was completely frozen in place and was unmovable. He grabbed my left arm and began twisting. First my wrist snapped, then slowly up my forearm began breaking. After that he pushed my elbow opposite to where it’s supposed to bend and caused a compound fracture. I was then unfrozen and immediately cried out in pain. Winthorp grabbed the back of my neck so I could sit straight up and squeezed lightly. He told me he knows I’m up to something and to just tell him. If I tell him all this will be over, but I’d be putting my friends in danger worse than this. I answered with, you’re insane. He threw my head forward and it bounced off the table in front of me. I held my face with both hands and realized my arms are normal again.
Winthorp then grabbed the back of my head with his open palm gripping the back of my skull. He told me to spill my guts. Before I could say anything I started projectile vomiting hard. At first it was what I ate, then bile, blood and after my organs began coming out of my mouth as if I was still throwing them up. Every organ was ejected out of my mouth and he made sure I could feel it all. Every time I would start passing out from the pain he’d jerk my head and bring me back. My tongue was next to be forced out and then my teeth one by one uprooted themselves to join the rest on the table and floor. My skin began to melt off my flesh with my nose and ears. My skeleton from my neck down also decided to leave. It moved on its own and forced its way out and through my muscle tissue like it was trapped. Lastly he made my eyes pop out to view it all. This was nothing compared to when he made it all do it again in reverse and even slower.
Ever felt your skeleton crawl back into your flesh? I do. He made sure the nerves felt it all and that I wouldn’t lose consciousness for even a moment while my body slowly and painfully repaired itself. Once I was fully repaired he asked again what me and my friends were doing. I told him it was only me. He sat back in front of me and stared long and hard. I was shaking with fear as to what he was planning to do next. He reached out his index finger, placed it in the center of my forehead and pushed hard. When I turned back up I was no longer in the interrogation room. I was in my room. My childhood room. I looked down and saw my pajamas I haven’t worn since I was 6 years old. I felt wet and warm in my bed and began crying loudly. My parents entered my room to console me and told me I must’ve had a nightmare. I tried telling them about The Pandemonium Complex and Winthorp, but was too broken to explain and just babbled on like the crying child I was now.
They told me it was okay and that I could sleep in their room tonight. A few years went by and The Pandemonium Complex was nothing more than just a memory of a bad dream. When I was 9 I came back home from school to see my front door was open. I entered slowly and saw that my house was a wreck. Like a tornado or wild beast came through. I called out to my parents and siblings, but no one answered. I went to the hallway and saw a blood trail leading into each room. I passed my siblings rooms first and only saw blood leading to their closed closets. I was too afraid to open them. I went to my parents room and saw they were torn apart. Looks of horror were frozen on their faces. I heard something behind me coming from my siblings' rooms.
I ran to my parents window. I unlocked it and jumped out leaving my backpack behind. This isn’t right. I ran to the neighbors house and they called the police. I lived with my aunt and uncle after that. Then my grandparents. All met the same fate as my household. I was placed in foster care at 13. I began questioning my memories and what’s happening. None of this seemed right. At 14 I was adopted into an abusive household. My adopted mother only beat and yelled at me. My adopted father was worse and did unspeakable things. I ran away at the age of 16 and was homeless for a year. I then met the love of my life. Tanisha, she was perfect. Kind, loving, empathetic and an all around good person. We were together for 2 years before I met my best friend, Tate.
They helped me get back on track and made my past seem like a bad memory. I was 26 now and was married with 3 loving children. My best friend Tate had a family of his own and we were raising our kids together. Life was perfect. Then one day I came home from work. My front door was open and I knew it was over. I entered my home. My children were torn apart and thrown around my living room like ragdolls. I went into our room and saw that it was torn apart, but Tanisha wasn’t there. I ran out when I heard a familiar noise coming from the living room. I jumped out my window and started running towards Tate’s house. I kept trying to call my wife’s phone nonstop. No answer. When I got to Tate’s house I saw that his door was also open. I ran inside to see the same scene happen to his children.
I ran into Tate’s room and found him and…my wife. She must’ve tried running here when she found our kids, I thought. A small red light caught my attention in the debris. A camera that was recording. I played the tape back to see what happened. My wife was cheating on me with Tate. The camera was filled with different videos from long before today. I started the video from today to my dismay. They were in the middle of it when screams could be heard from the living room. I was so focused on what was going to happen that I didn’t notice the presence behind me. A scream broke the silence before I could see what entered the room and I turned to see Sarah, Tate’s wife screaming with horror at me. I tried calming her down and explain, but she had the police behind her already. I was arrested and was found guilty for murder.
They thought I killed them all because I found out they were cheating and also pinned the past murders on me since whatever kept happening is following me. I was thrown into a dark cold prison to live out my days in a hole. My days consisted of starving, being beaten and cold. I wanted to die. The death sentence was banned since I was a child, so all I could do was wait for death. One day, when I had given up, a few guards entered my room. I won’t say what happened, but it ended with them beating me nonstop until I couldn’t fight back. They didn’t stop beating me and when I was finally getting my wish of death I was sitting in a chair. I was in a small room with a man sitting across from me. A small bellhop wearing a straw boat hat. Winthorp. All my memories came flooding back. Memories of the past and now mixed and formed back into my hellish life.
Winthorp asked me again what we were planning. I looked him dead in the eye and just answered, I will kill you. A grin formed on his face again and he leaned in. How? He asked plain and simply. I knew I said too much again and just went silent. I don’t know how long I was there for. He made me live other hellish lives and tortured me over and over again in ways that would make the devil himself want to die. I never said another word. I could tell he was getting frustrated and was losing his cool. His methods started becoming sloppy and desperate. One of the benefits of being a basic mortal human is that we die very easily, so you could do whatever to us, but in the end they start getting very similar and I learned to get used to it. Once he realized he wasn’t getting anything out of me he threw me back into my room in the complex. I was thrown hard through the air and saw my furniture fly past me before I hit my wall hard. That’s when I just broke and just cried for hours.
I just needed to release. What I didn’t notice was Gunter was on the couch the whole time. He sat silently and just let me break. I think he knew I just needed to let it all out. I don’t know if he knew what I just went through, but he just started getting some fruit ready for me to eat when I’m ready. The small spider crawled out of my sleeve and ran to Siete under Gunter’s cornucopia. I slept for an unknown amount of time, but my body definitely needed it. When I woke up, I ate and Gunter asked me if I wanted to talk. I just asked how long I had been gone. He said Jim, Jon and I left just a few minutes before I was suddenly flying through my room from out of nowhere. He asked more directly as to what happened. I didn’t give him all the details, but now my mind is set. Winthorp and The Pandemonium Complex need to die.

Hello!
So last week I had 24 hours to know what Logan is about. Reason is that I might move there in the near future and, aside from meeting my prospective employer, I wanted to also know if Logan is the right fit for me to live in. Therefore, I made a post asking the good people of Logan what were some good places to visit to convince myself that Logan is a good place to live.
I promised I'd make an update once I finished my visit. But to my surprise, the post got a lot of activity (at least relative to other recent posts I've seen here), so I decided to make a separate post and you can find that other post here. My hope is that others may find that unspoiled post in the future that solely focuses on what to see/visit, and then find this other post with my unbiased opinions
Initial thoughts on Logan:
Aesthetically, I think Logan is nice. I'm a fan of "not-modern" architecture, so I loved the old buildings, houses, and temples/tabernacles/churches. And I have to say, there's a lot of the latter. There was still quite an amount of snow, so everything looked white, but the mountain that's to the east is beautiful and there are a lot of trees which I also love.
Most of the people I interacted with were nice! But I can't say the same for those driving. It may have been me driving extra carefully since I'm not used to driving in snow, but I was still going at the speed limit (sometimes maybe 5 mph less), and everyone was overtaking me. It felt like everyone was in such a rush. Which reminds me...
Rant: I was walking downtown and was waiting to cross the road. When the light changed in my favor, I started to walk, but some gentleman in his car decided to make the right turn as I was starting to cross. We even made eye contact, so he knew I was crossing, but he still decided to press the gas. I don't know if the laws in Utah are different, but I'm pretty sure I had the right-of-way. But whatever, I've been/lived in far worse and just wanted to rant a little.
Places/Restaurants I visited:
So there's not much to do in Logan, at least not during Winter as many have mentioned already. Mostly, people suggested eateries, so I hope y'all have a good amount of cultural events during the summer or have families to keep yourself busy/entertained throughout the year because for the folks like me (single, mid-20s) it seems rough. Anyhow, I got lots of suggestions. I wasn't able to go to all of them in 24 hours, but here are the ones I went to:
Angie's: This restaurant seemed like a must to visit. Lots of people mentioned it, and a couple were hating on it, so I had to try it myself. I'd say it's good! I liked the atmosphere, the food was good and the service was great! The only complaint I have is that I had to pay at the register, say what I had to eat, and say out loud how much I wanted to tip. I think those that hate Angie's are only doing so because it's popular. For those curious, I had a Black and Bleu burger with tots and a Hot Fudge Caramel Shake (which was delicious but I had to take out becasue it was a lot of shake) .
Caffe Ibis: This place is amazing! It's a little cafe with delicious coffee and delicious, fresh pastries (not sponsored). Warm and inviting atmosphere, and nice people! I had a traditional Cappuccino and a Fruit Danish. God, I would go every Saturday just to have that cappuccino and blueberry and cream cheese fruit danish.
Crumb Bros: It's alright, don't have muich to say. Someone suggested getting the Cuban sandwich, so I did and it was good, nothing special I'm afraid (but hey, if you love it don't let me bring it down). I also had another cappuccino to compare with the one I had in Caffe Ibis, and man... it was awful. The servers were really nice tho!
Aggie Creamery: Only one person mentioned this one, and I'm not religious but God bless that soul. I think it's the best ice cream I've ever had. The ice cream was creamy, thick and not overly sweet. And the cone... I just have to say, pick the waffle cone (there's a variation dipped in chocolate), you will regret it if you don't go with the cone. I was unsure of what ice cream to pick, so I asked which ones were the most popular, don't ask me for names though, one was chocolate with like chunks of chocolate, and the other one was blue, mint flavored with oreo-like crumbs. Both delicious (and I'm not a fan of mint flavoured ice cream).
Downtown: You can walk it in like five minutes... but it's a cute downtown. I entered Cache Valley Antiques, and I have to say, this antique shop is one of the very few authentic antique shops I've been to). They actually have antiques and interesting things, not like other antique shops that are just thrift stores filled with literal garbage. I also entered Toad and Tricycle Games, I'm not much into board games but they had a good selection and people were playing there, so it's quite active.
Logan Canyon: Someone said that I should visit First and Second Dam and that I don't have to go all the way to Bear Lake. I still tried to go all the way, but at some point, there was a sign saying that snow tires or chains were required. I was in a rental car that I hated and did not trust, so decided to not risk it. I stopped at first damn though, it's nice. I met a kid fishing there, quite a charismatic fellow. I don't know how, but he claimed I scared him as I was making my way to the end of the pier. After I left, I realized I did not ask his name, but still wanted to shout him out here. So if you're reading this, kid, just wanted to say that I'm sorry I startled you and maybe we can fish together someday, if I ever move to Logan.
Utah State University: Some of the buildings made me feel like I was in Harry Potter. Some parts are pretty, other parts were 'meh', nothing special for me I guess. Although, it may have been because I was more preoccupied with making sure I didn't fall while walking on ice.
Final Thoughts:
I could live there; I can see myself living there. Albeit, for the right price. As I see it, they would have to pay me, not only to do my job but also to live there. Because it feels extremely isolated. I live alone, but while I was in Logan, I actually felt alone. You look to the east and there's this huge mountain, which is nice, right? But then you look to the west and there's this huge field of nothingness that stretches all the way up to some far away little mountains and then the horizon. And there's simply not much to do there. Apparently, there's a lot of outdoorsy stuff to do, but what about the indoorsy? You know, aside from restaurants.
Loganians (or whatever the town's people are called) claim that it's affordable to live there, but honestly, I'm not seeing that way. Current gas prices are slightly higher than Tucson's, which I can forgive because it may have something to do with location or something. But rent prices are about the same and, in most cases I've seen, more expensive than Tucson's. Maybe when they say "affordable housing" they are referring to mortgages, or maybe when compared to California, but anything is more affordable than Cali.
This is way longer than I had planned on being. I don't know if anyone's going to read all of it, but a couple of people have already asked me for my thoughts on my other post, so here they are. Thank you to everyone that made suggestions on the other post and to those who read all of these.
TL;DR: Logan is nice. Could live there for the right price. Great places to eat. Not much to do.

The Big List Disney codes are split & do not include the GP portion, but the DMI points are included. All Sony titles include points as long as the title is eligible. Please only redeem the portion of a code you are paying for. Prices are firm for now. I accept Cashapp, Venmo, Zelle, Fb pay & PayPal F&F. Comment & pm if interested. Thanks!
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$5 4K UHD

Dolittle [2020] (MA)
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$4 4K UHD

Alita: Battle Angel (MA)
Big Lebowski, The (iTunes/ports)
Black Panther (MA + 200 points)
Captain Marvel (MA + 200 points)
Christopher Robin [2018] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Doctor Strange (MA + 200 points)
Dr. Seuss' How The Grinch Stole Christmas [2000] (iTunes/ports)
Finding Nemo (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Frozen II (MA + 200 points)
Guardians Of The Galaxy (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Heat [1995] (iTunes/ports)
Hocus Pocus (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Invisible Man, The [2020] (MA)
Pretty In Pink (iTunes)
Ralph Breaks The Internet (MA + 200 points)
Rear Window [1954] (MA)
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$4 HD

Blacklist season 1 (Vudu)
Company Of Heroes [2013] (MA)
Jungle Book, The [1967] (MA + 150 points)
Justified season 4 (Vudu)
Night Of, The [2016] (iTunes)
Pocahontas II: Journey To A New World (MA + 150 points)
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$3️⃣ Movies

#$3 4K UHD
Bourne Ultimatum, The (MA)
Coco (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Doctor Strange (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Escape Plan (Vudu)
Everest [2015] (iTunes/ports)
Frozen II (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Home Alone (iTunes/ports or HD MA/GP)
Hot Fuzz (iTunes/ports)
Incredibles 2, The (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Iron Man 3 (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Jigsaw (Vudu)
Logan Lucky [2017] (iTunes/ports)
Moana (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Oblivion (iTunes/ports)
Purge: Election Year, The (MA)
Transformers: Age Of Extinction (Vudu)
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon (Vudu)
Zootopia (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
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$3 HD

About Last Night (MA + Sony points)
American Assassin (Vudu)
American Underdog (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Baby Driver (MA + Sony points)
Banshee season 4 (iTunes)
Breakfast Club, The [1985] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Constantine: The House of Misery (MA)
Dolittle [2020] (MA)
Downton Abbey: A New Era (MA)
Free Guy (MA + 150 points)
Hobbs & Shaw (MA)
Hotel Transylvania [2012] (MA + Sony points)
How To Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (MA)
Interview, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Into The Woods (MA + 150 points)
Invisible Man, The [2020] (MA)
Legend [2015] (iTunes/ports)
Les Miserables [1998] (MA)
Lightyear (MA + 150 points)
Lone Ranger, The [2013] (MA + 150 points)
Love, Simon [2018] (MA)
Max Steel [2016] (MA)
Molly's Game (iTunes)
Monster Calls, A [2017] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Neighbors 2 (iTunes/ports)
Overcomer [2019] (MA + Sony points)
Phoenix Forgotten (MA or iTunes/ports)
Pirate Fairy, The (MA + 150 points)
Poison Rose, The (Vudu or Google Play)
Raya & The Last Dragon (MA + 150 points)
Sex Tape (MA + Sony points)
Sicario: Day Of The Soldado (MA + Sony points)
Sleeping Beauty [1959] (MA + 150 points)
Space Between Us, The (MA or iTunes/ports)
Super Buddies [2013] (MA + Sony points)
This Is The End (MA + Sony points)
Wedding Ringer, The (MA + Sony points)
When The Bough Breaks (MA + Sony points)
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All codes are $2. Prices are firm for now. Please only redeem the you are paying for. Any Disney codes are split. MA/iTunes Disney will include points but not the GP redeem. All Sony titles include points as long as the title is eligible. If you have any questions feel free to ask. I accept Cashapp, Venmo, Zelle, Fb pay or PayPal F&F. Comment & pm if interested. Thanks for checking out my list.
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13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi (iTunes 4K)
2 Guns (MA or iTunes/ports)
3 From Hell [Unrated] (Vudu 4K or iTunes 4K)
Adventures Of Tintin, The (iTunes)
Age Of Adaline, The (Vudu)
Aladdin [1992] (MA + 150 points/ does not port 4K from iTunes)
Alien Covenant (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
All Eyez On Me (iTunes)
Allied [2016] (iTunes 4K)
Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Road Chip (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
American Assassin (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
American Reunion [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Arrival [2016] (Vudu)
Assassination Nation (MA)
Assassin's Creed (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Atomic Blonde (iTunes/ports 4K)
August: Osage County (Vudu)
Bad Grandpa (iTunes)
Bad Moms (MA or iTunes/ports)
Battleship [2012] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Baywatch (iTunes 4K)
Beauty & The Beast [2017] (MA + 150 points/iTunes option is expired)
Ben-Hur [2016] (Vudu)
Big Wedding, The (iTunes)
Black Panther (MA + 150 points/iTunes option is expired)
Book Club (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Boss, The [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Bourne Legacy, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Bourne Ultimatum, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Boyhood (Vudu or iTunes)
Breakthrough [2019] (MA)
Brian Banks (MA)
Cabin In The Woods, The (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Case For Christ, The (MA or iTunes/ports)
Choice, The [2016] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Contraband (iTunes/ports)
Cowboys & Aliens [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Croods, The [2013] (MA)
Cult Of Chucky [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Daddy's Home (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Darkest Hour [2017] (MA)
Dark Tower, The [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Deepwater Horizon (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Despicable Me 2 (iTunes/ports 4K)
Diary Of A Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul (MA or iTunes/ports)
Dirty Grandpa (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Divergent (iTunes 4K)
Divergent Series: Allegiant, The (iTunes 4K)
Divergent Series: Insurgent (iTunes 4K)
Django Unchained (Vudu)
Dog's Purpose, A (MA or iTunes/ports)
Downsizing (Vudu)
Dying Of The Light (Vudu)
Edward Scissorhands (MA)
Emoji Movie, The (MA + Sony points)
Ender's Game (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Epic [2013] (MA)
Escape Plan (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Everest [2015] (MA)
Ex Machina (Vudu)
Fast & Furious 6, The [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Fate Of The Furious [F8] [Theatrical & Extended] (MA 4K or iTunes/ports 4K)
Fault In Our Stars, The (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Fences [2016] (iTunes 4K)
Fifty Shades Darker [Unrated] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Fifty Shades Of Grey [Unrated] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Finding Dory (iTunes/ports 4K or HD + 150 points)
Finding Nemo (Google Play/ports)
Flight [2012] (Vudu)
Frozen (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Furious 7 [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Gemini Man (iTunes 4K)
Ghostbusters [2016] [Theatrical & Extended] (MA + Sony points)
G.I. Joe: Retaliation (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Girl On The Train, The [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Giver, The [2014] (Vudu)
God's Not Dead 2 (MA or iTunes/ports)
Gods Of Egypt (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Gotti (Vudu)
Grace Unplugged (Vudu)
Greatest Showman, The (MA)
Great Wall, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Grey, The [2012] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Guardians Of The Galaxy (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Guilt Trip, The [2012] (Vudu or iTunes)
Gunman, The [2015] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Hail, Caesar (MA or iTunes/ports)
Halloween [2018] (MA)
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters [Unrated] (Vudu or iTunes)
Hardcore Henry (MA or iTunes/ports)
Hateful Eight, The (Vudu or Google Play)
Heat, The [2013] (MA)
Hell Or High Water (Vudu or Google Play)
Hercules [2014] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Hidden Figures (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Hitman's Bodyguard, The (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Hocus Pocus (Google Play/ports)
Home [2015] (MA)
Homefront [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Hop [2011] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Host, The [2013] (iTunes/ports)
How To Train Your Dragon 2 (MA)
Hugo (Vudu or iTunes)
Hunger Games, The (iTunes 4K)
Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, The (iTunes 4K)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2, The (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
I Can Only Imagine (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Ice Age: Collision Course (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Independence Day: Resurgence (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Indiana Jones & The Last Crusade (Vudu)
Inferno [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Instant Family (iTunes 4K)
Internship, The [2013] [Theatrical](MA)
Interstellar (Vudu or Google Play)
Jackass 3 [Theatrical] (Vudu or iTunes)
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (Vudu)
Jarhead 2: Field Of Fire [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Jason Bourne (iTunes/ports 4K)
Jaws (MA)
John Wick (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum (iTunes 4K)
Joy [2015] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Jurassic World (iTunes/ports 4K)
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (MA)
Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain (Vudu)
Kick-Ass 2 (MA or iTunes/ports)
Kidnap [2017] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Killer Elite (iTunes/ports)
Killing Them Softly (Vudu)
Last Stand, The [2013] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Last Witch Hunter, The (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Legend Of Hercules, The (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Life Of Pi (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Lion King, The [1994] (Google Play/ports)
Logan (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Lone Ranger, The [2013] (Google Play/ports)
Lone Survivor (iTunes/ports 4K)
Longest Ride, The (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Lorax, The [2012] (iTunes/ports)
Love The Coopers (iTunes)
Lucy (iTunes/ports 4K)
Maggie (Vudu)
Maleficent (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Mama [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Man With The Iron Fists, The [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Marauders (Vudu)
Marvel's The Avengers [2012] (Google Play/ports)
Mechanic: Resurrection (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Mindgamers (MA or iTunes/ports)
Minions (iTunes/ports 4K)
Mission Impossible [1996] (Vudu)
Mission Impossible 2: MI2 (Vudu)
Mission Impossible 3: MI3 (Vudu)
Mission Impossible: Fallout (Vudu 4K or iTunes 4K)
Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (iTunes 4K)
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (iTunes 4K)
Mountain Between Us, The (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Mr. Holmes [2015] (Vudu)
Mud (Vudu)
Mummy, The [2017] (MA)
Noah [2014] (Vudu or iTunes)
Non-Stop [2014] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Now You See Me 2 (Vudu or GP/ iTunes option is expired)
Nut Job 2 : Nutty By Nature, The (MA or iTunes/ports)
Office Christmas Party (Vudu)
Orange Is The New Black season 2 (Vudu)
Other Woman, The [2014] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Overdrive [2017] (iTunes)
Oz The Great & Powerful (MA + 150 points)
Pain & Gain (iTunes)
Paranormal Activity [Theatrical] (Vudu)
Paranormal Activity 2 [Unrated Director's Cut] (iTunes)
Paranormal Activity 4 [Unrated] (iTunes)
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones [Theatrical] (iTunes)
Paul [2011] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Peanuts Movie, The [2015] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Peppermint (iTunes)
Percy Jackson: Sea Of Monsters (MA or Google Play/ports)
Pet Sematary [2019] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Pirate Fairy, The (Google Play/ports
Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales (MA + 150 points only/iTunes option is expired)
Pitch Perfect (iTunes/ports 4K)
Pitch Perfect 2 (iTunes/ports 4K)
Planes [2013] (MA + 150 points)
Possession, The [2012] (iTunes)
Prometheus (MA)
Purge: Election Year, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Queen Of Katwe (Google Play/ports)
Quiet Place, A [2018] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Raya & The Last Dragon (Google Play/ports)
Resident Evil: Retribution (MA + Sony points)
Riddick [2013] [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Ride Along (MA or iTunes/ports)
Ride Along 2 (iTunes/ports)
Robin Hood [2018] (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Robocop [2014] (Vudu or Google Play)
Saban's Power Rangers (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Safe House [2012] (iTunes/ports)
Same Kind Of Different As Me (iTunes)
Saving Mr. Banks (Google Play/ports)
Secret Life Of Pets, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Secret Life Of Walter Mitty, The (MA or Google Play ports/ iTunes option is expired)
Selma (iTunes)
Show Dogs [2018] (MA)
Sicario (Vudu 4K, iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Silver Linings Playbook (Vudu or Google Play)
Sing [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Sinister (Vudu or iTunes)
Skyfall (Vudu or Google Play)
Snatched [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Snow White & The Huntsman [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Spectre (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (MA + Sony points)
Split [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Stand Up Guys (Vudu)
Star Trek [2009] (iTunes 4K)
Star Trek Beyond (iTunes 4K)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Star Wars: The Last Jedi (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Straight Outta Compton [Unrated] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Super 8 (Vudu)
Ted [Unrated] (MA)
Terminator: Genisys (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
This Is 40 [Theatrical] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Thor: Ragnarok (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Trolls (MA)
True Grit [2010] (Vudu or iTunes)
Turbo [2013] (MA)
Tyler Perry's Temptation: Confessions Of A Marriage Counselor (Vudu)
Underworld: Awakening (MA + Sony points)
Valerian & The City Of A Thousand Planets (Vudu)
Venom (MA + Sony points)
Warcraft (iTunes/ports 4K)
War For The Planet Of The Apes (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Warm Bodies (iTunes 4K or GP HD)
War Room [2015] (MA + Sony points)
When The Game Stands Tall (MA + Sony points)
Why Him? (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Wild Card (Vudu)
Wolf Of Wall Street, The (Vudu)
Wolverine, The [Unleashed Extended Edition] (MA, iTunes or Google Play ports)
Wonder [2017] (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
X-Men: Apocalypse (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
X-Men: Days Of Future Past (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
XXX: Return Of Xander Cage (iTunes 4K)
🦝

💲2️⃣ SD

12 Rounds [2009] [Extreme Cut] (iTunes/ports)
17 Again (iTunes/ports)
Alien vs Predator: Requiem [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Black Swan (iTunes/ports)
Company Of Heroes (MA)
Dr. Suess: Horton Hears A Who! (iTunes/ports)
Get The Gringo (iTunes/ports)
Juno (iTunes/ports)
Machete (iTunes/ports)
Miss March [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Mr. Popper's Penguins (iTunes/ports)
Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (iTunes/ports)
Tooth Fairy (iTunes/ports)
Unstoppable (iTunes/ports)
We Bought A Zoo (iTunes/ports)
What Happens In Vegas [Extended] (iTunes/ports)
🦝

$1 Codes

💲1️⃣ HD

13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi (Vudu)
2 Fast 2 Furious (MA)
Aladdin [1992] (Google Play/ports)
Aladdin [2019] (Google Play/ports)
Alex Cross (Vudu)
Aladdin [2019] (Google Play/ports)
Atomic Blonde (MA)
Avengers: Age Of Ultron (Google Play/ports)
Avengers: Endgame (Google Play/ports)
Avengers: Infinity War (Google Play/ports)
Beauty & The Beast [2017] (Google Play/ports)
Bourne Legacy, The (MA)
Bourne Ultimatum, The (MA)
Bumblebee (Vudu)
Captain America: Winter Soldier (Google Play/ports)
Captain Marvel (Google Play/ports)
Cars 3 (Google Play/ports)
Coco (Google Play/ports)
Deadpool (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Despicable Me 2 (MA)
Divergent (Vudu)
Divergent Series: Insurgent, The (Vudu or Google Play)
Doctor Strange (Google Play/ports)
Dracula Untold (MA) PENDING
Ender's Game (Vudu)
Escape Plan (Vudu)
Expendables 2, The
Expendables 3, The [Theatrical] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Expendables 3, The [Unrated] (Vudu or iTunes)
Fast & Furious [4] (MA)
Fast & Furious 6 [Extended] (MA)
Fast & The Furious, The [2001] (MA)
Fast Five [Extended] (MA)
Fate Of The Furious, The [8] [Theatrical] (HD MA)
Fate Of The Furious, The [8] [Extended] (MA)
Finding Dory (Google Play/ports)
Frozen (Google Play/ports)
Furious 7 [Extended] (MA)
Girl On The Train, The (MA)
Girls Trip (MA or iTunes/ports)
Hillsong: Let Hope Rise (iTunes/ports)
Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (Vudu)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, The (Vudu)
Huntsman: Winter's War, The [Extended] (MA)
I Feel Pretty (iTunes)
Inside Out (Google Play/ports)
Iron Man 3 (MA only/no points or Google Play/ports)
Jason Bourne (MA)
John Wick 3 (Google Play)
Jurassic Park [1993] (MA)
Jurassic World (MA)
Let's Be Cops (MA)
Lion King, The [2019] (Google Play/ports)
Lone Survivor (MA)
Maleficent (Google Play/ports)
Mama Mia! The Movie (MA)
Mary Poppins Returns (Google Play/ports)
Minions (MA)
Mission Impossible: Fallout (Vudu)
Moana (Google Play/ports)
Mulan [2020] (Google Play/ports)
Norm Of The North (Vudu)
Now You See Me (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Oz: The Great & Powerful (Google Play/ports)
Perks Of Being A Wallflower, The (Vudu, Google Play or iTunes)
Pitch Perfect (MA)
Pitch Perfect 2 (MA)
Planes (Google Play/ports)
Purge, The (MA)
Red 2 (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Google Play/ports)
Secret Life Of Pets, The (MA)
Sing [2016] (MA)
Snitch (Vudu)
Snow White & The Huntsman [Extended] (MA)
Star Trek: Into Darkness (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Star Wars: Rise Of Skywalker (Google Play/ports)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (Google Play/ports)
Star Wars: The Last Jedi (Google Play/ports)
Ted [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles [2014] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Thor: Ragnarok (Google Play/ports)
Toy Story 4 (Google Play/ports)
Transformers: Age Of Extinction (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon (Vudu)
Transformers: The Last Knight (iTunes 4K)
Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection (Vudu or iTunes)
Unbroken [2014] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Warcraft (MA)
Warm Bodies (Vudu)
World War Z (iTunes)
XXX: Return Of Xander Cage (Vudu)
Zootopia (Google Play/ports)
🦝

💲1️⃣ SD

21 Jump Street (MA + Sony points)
22 Jump Street (MA + Sony points)
Abduction (iTunes)
Act Of Valor (iTunes)
Addicted [2014] (Vudu)
Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (iTunes/ports)
Amazing Spider-Man, The (MA)
Angels Sing (Vudu)
Arthur Christmas (MA + Sony points)
Bangkok Dangerous (iTunes)
Brooklyn's Finest (iTunes)
Captain Phillips (MA + Sony points)
Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs 2 (MA + Sony points)
Deliver Us From Evil [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Devil Inside, The [2012] (Vudu)
Diary Of A Wimpy Kid: Dog Days (iTunes/ports)
Due Date (iTunes/ports)
Expendables, The (iTunes)
Evil Dead [2013] MA + Sony points)
Family Guy: Blue Harvest (iTunes)
Fury [2014] (MA + Sony points)
G.I. Joe: The Rise Of Cobra (iTunes)
Glee: The Concert (iTunes/ports)
Haunting In Connecticut, The (iTunes)
Heaven Is For Real (MA + Sony points)
Here Comes The Boom (MA + Sony points)
Hope Springs [2012] (MA)
Hotel Transylvania (MA + Sony points)
Immortals [2011] (iTunes)
Inglourious Basterds (iTunes/ports)
Insidious: Chapter 2 (MA + Sony points)
Judy Moody & The Not Bummer Summer (iTunes)
Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle (MA + Sony points)
Jurassic Park III (MA)
Kick-Ass (iTunes)
Life As We Know It (iTunes)
Lost World: Jurassic Park, The (iTunes/ports)
Monsters [2010] (iTunes)
Monuments Men, The (MA + Sony points)
Mortal Instruments : City Of Bones, The (MA + Sony points)
Nerve (Vudu)
One For The Money (iTunes)
Ong Bak 3 (iTunes)
Overcomer [2019] (MA + Sony points)
Parker (MA + Sony points)
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (MA + Sony points)
Perfect Guy, The [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Public Enemies (iTunes/ports)
Rambo [2008] (iTunes)
Resident Evil: Retribution (MA + Sony points)
Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes (iTunes/ports)
Rite, The [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Robin Hood [2010] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Safe Haven (iTunes)
Spirit, The [2008] (iTunes)
Superfly [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Taken [Extended Cut] (iTunes/ports)
Think Like A Man (MA + Sony points)
This Is The End (MA + Sony points)
Thousand Words, A (Vudu)
Total Recall [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps (iTunes/ports)
When The Game Stands Tall (MA + Sony points)
VVitch, The [A24] (Vudu)
Woman In Black, The (MA)
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (iTunes/ports)
🦝

Super Cheap SD Codes

All movies are 3 for $1 or $0.33 each/must spend at least $1 total
Cabin In The Woods, The (Vudu only)
Expendables 2, The (Vudu or iTunes only)
Perks Of Being A Wallflower, The (iTunes only)
Red Dawn [2012] (iTunes only)

It’s the year 1817. Napoleon had just been deafened by a coalition of European nations. While the victorious nations are working on a new order for Europe, Matthew Wellesley, the future duke of Wellington, had just returned form a campaign in North Africa. His farther, Arthur Duke of Wellington had defeated Napoleon in the battle of Waterloo, was keen on finding a suitable wife for his oldest son and heir. So Matthew had to spend his afternoons with boring meetings with woman of the aristocracy. Although some of them were really kind and beautiful, his heart already belonged to another woman. And if this love would be discovered both of them would loose everything. Isabelle was born in Spain. Her parents had been farmers and after a nature catastrophe they left their home. Her farther had heard that in England every man could make his fortune if he was working hard enough for it. So he, his wife and Isabelle grabbed all their money and moved over to England. Looking for work, Isabelle’s farther met a man, who was the overseer of the country estate of the duke of Wellington. Offering him a job the José’s moved on the country estate and Emanuel worked as a miller. Isabelle was behaved to become a maid for the future duchess of Wellington, Matthews future wife. Isabelle and Matthew had always liked each other. As children they used to play in the gardens or in the big house, even though Matthews future didn’t agree with it. And as both of them grew older, their relationship only became deeper. And so it was no wonder that they started a secret relationship before Matthew had to go on his campaign in Africa. Not having seen Isabelle for nearly two years Matthew can’t wait to return home to see his true love…
Hi! I’m sorry for the longer introduction to this plot but it was important for me to introduce you to the dynamics and background of the two main characters. I had in mind that the story starts with Matthews return to his home after spending almost two years in Africa, because England was fighting a war with France. In that time Isabelle had worked for Matthews farther and had to deal with him trying to find a suitable wife for his future hair. Even though this was ripping her heart apart, she knew that Matthew was only loving her. And as he returned unharmed, they tried to spend every minute together without his farther catching them. I picture the story that they’re always meeting in the evenings, in a little cabin near the house. During their days there might be a little privacy but not that much. The story would start when Matthew returns home. If you’re having any questions, please let me know. I’m happy to answer them!

Full Series:

• Introduction
• Bridesmaids
• Dynastenders (this post)
• Dynasties

I’ve been sitting on this series for a while, but because I don’t want to redo everything after the season, I want to hopefully get both of these last installments in before the end of the regular season. There are two teams on these respective lists (Milwaukee and Golden State) who are still relevant today, which will hopefully pique some interest. I might end up editing longer write-ups for some of these teams later, while still making sure to get the post out in a reasonable amount of time.
A “dynastender”, coined by Bill Simmons, is a team who won a championship, but failed to qualify as a Dynasty proper (which requires three or more titles in six or fewer seasons). While the Bridesmaid list had 15 entries (as it takes more to stand out without a title to your name), this Dynastender list is lengthier (23 teams), as winning a championship will give you enough points to get to 10 most of the tme.
It’s often said in contexts like this that nobody remembers second place, and you’d rather be at the bottom of this list than at the top of the previous one. However, thinking about it I’m not sure I agree. That’s true in one respect, but Bridesmaids do have the advantage of standing out for their lack of hardware; having the marks of a potential dynasty with zero championships is a compelling storyline, but if you do win a championship you might run the risk of getting blurred together with numerous other teams with similar storylines.
There are two slight changes I made to the rules when it comes to displaying players and coaches: [1] if a coach won a championship, they get included (Pat Riley wouldn’t be included on the Heat otherwise); [2] for a player to make the list for 20 Win Shares, only seasons where they’re top 5 on the team in WS count (my memory of the Bridesmaid list is vague, and I might have missed 20-WS players before, but this rule change makes it easier for me to not miss anyone).
Two more notes by way of citation:

• I got all of the data for this series from Basketball Reference.
• Credit to Joe Dimino for having his own NFL dynasty system shortly after James’ MLB one. His is part of the family tree of this one, although I don’t think I mentioned it in my original post.

Missed the Cut

I actually have to make some cuts to get under 40,000 characters, so this is what I decided to cut (I'll put this section in the comments). Besides, maybe it'll help build suspense for which teams did and didn't make the main list.

23. St. Louis Hawks, 1957-1961

Head Coach: Alex Hannum, Ed Macauley, Paul Seymour
Key Players: Bob Petit, Cliff Hagan, Clyde Lovellette, Ed Macauley
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 19th in Points (12.39), 23rd in adjusted Championships (0.52), 8th in adjusted Finals appearances (2.07), 23rd in win% (.597), 20th in playoff win% (.528), 23rd in adjusted Net Rating (+1.3), 23rd in Top 5 aNR (+1.3)
Avg z-score: -1.08
Just like with the Bridesmaid list, we start with a team from the early days of the NBA; accomplishments like making two Finals and winning one are likely to be more impressive today than back when there were a handful of teams in the league. The title the Hawks did win also comes in at #3 on Bill Simmons’ footnote title list, due to a Bill Russell injury which weakened the Celtics. On the other hand, that was the only Finals loss that one of the greatest teams of all time suffered, and the Hawks took them to seven in ‘57 and ‘60. So maybe winning a single title is a “fairer” result than thinking only about Russell’s injury would lead one to believe.

22. Seattle SuperSonics, 1978-1980

Head Coach: Lenny Wilkens
Key Players: Gus Williams, Jack Sikma, Dennis Johnson, Lonnie Shelton, Marvin Webster
Dynastender Rankings: 21st-23rd in Seasons (3), 20th in Points (11.77), 16th in adjusted Championships (0.86), 15th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.71), 20th in win% (.630), 12th-13th in playoff win% (.593), 21st in adjusted Net Rating (+2.7), 22nd in Top 5 aNR (+1.6)
Avg z-score: -0.82
These guys might be the most forgettable post-merger team in this entire series, at least from where I’m sitting. Mike the NBA Guy agrees with me, as he made a YouTube video with basically the same name. It probably doesn’t help that they didn’t have many memorable players, and that they played in the 70s; too late for the nostalgic Wilt/Russell era, but too early for the Bird/Magic era.
In ‘78, Seattle lost a seven-game Finals series to the Bullets, the worst NBA champion of all time (by both win percentage and net rating). The next season, they won an extremely nail-biting conference finals against the Suns, and struck back by beating Washington in five to get the title. 56 wins and a conference final loss in 1980 was enough to qualify for this list, but they weren’t able to sustain success for long enough to be remembered.

21. Miami Heat, 2004-2006

Head Coach: Stan Van Gundy, Pat Riley
Key Players: Dwyane Wade, Udonis Haslem, Shaquille O’Neal, Eddie Jones, Damon Jones, Lamar Odom
Dynastender Rankings: 21st-23rd in Seasons (3), 23rd in Points (10), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 19th-21st in adjusted Finals appearances (1), 22nd in win% (.622), 5th in playoff win% (.647), 17th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.3), 21st in Top 5 aNR (+2.0)
Avg z-score: -0.76
Shaq’s last real hurrah was in Miami, where his stint alongside Dwyane Wade was so short that despite winning a (footnote) championship, his years alone actually wouldn’t have been enough for his team to be an official Dynastender. The 2004 series between Miami and New Orleans is otherwise rather forgettable, but the Heat qualified for that season- and for the list overall- because they were able to eke that series out in seven.
Relatively speaking, the only real bright spot keeping the Heat ahead of the Sonics is their playoff record; in fact, this is the first of five teams we’ll cover in this series who have a higher win percentage in the playoffs than in the regular season. Two sweeps to start off 2005 help, as well as two close series losses in ‘04 and ‘05, followed by a solid championship run where nobody took Miami to seven.

20. Los Angeles/Utah Stars, 1970-1974

Head Coach: Bill Sharman, LaDell Andersen, Joe Mullaney
Key Players: Zelmo Beaty, Willie Wise, Jimmy Jones, Ron Boone, Mark Calvin
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 18th in Points (13.17), 19th-20th in adjusted Championships (0.61), 13th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.79), 19th in win% (.633), 10th in playoff win% (.595), 18th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.15), 18th in Top 5 aNR (+3.15)
Avg z-score: -0.64
If this team doesn’t look familiar, it’s because I decided to include the ABA for this series.
The LA Stars managed to make the ABA Finals after a 43-41 season in 1970, the year before they moved to Utah. The team improved after moving, sporting 57, 60, and 55-win seasons, and squeaking out a championship in ‘71 after seven-game series in both of the final rounds, including the mighty Pacers. Utah would be the 1-seed in the Western division the next three seasons, but lose in the playoffs: twice to the Pacers, and once to a team coming up on this list.

19. Rochester Royals, 1949-1954

Head Coach: Les Harrison
Key Players: Bobby Wanzer, Arnie Risen, Bob Davies, Arnie Johnson, Jack Coleman
Dynastender Rankings: 5th-8th in Seasons (6), 17th-18th in Points (13.17), 19th-20th in adjusted Championships (0.61), 22nd in adjusted Finals appearances (0.61), 14th in win% (.658), 23rd in playoff win% (.500), 14th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.0), 14th in Top 5 aNR (+4.3)
Avg z-score: -0.64
This Royals team is best known as the last time the Kings’ franchise has won a title; when you have to go back this far, it’s probably even more humiliating than simply having never won a title at all.
We have to go all the way back to the BAA for the start of this run; where in ‘48-49, the Royals had the best record in the league but lost the Division Finals to Mikan’s Lakers. Then in 1950, the new NBA had a best-of 3 format before the Finals, where the Royals got swept in two games against the Ft. Wayne Pistons. It was in Rochester’s worst regular season of this run (‘51) that they actually won the championship, in what was also their only Finals appearance. They sustained their run with three more moderately good regular seasons, but petered out in the playoffs against the Lakers (twice) and Pistons (once).

18. Kentucky Colonels, 1970-1975

Head Coach: Gene Rhodes, Joe Mullaney, Babe McCarthy, Hubie Brown
Key Players: Artis Gilmore, Dan Issel, Louie Dampier, Goose Ligon, Darel Carrier, Cincy Powell
Dynastender Rankings: 5th-8th in Seasons (6), 16th in Points (13.76), 21st-22nd in adjusted Championships (0.58), 14th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.76), 18th in win% (.643), 17th in playoff win% (.570), 15th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.7), 13th in Top 5 aNR (+4.5)
Avg z-score: -0.51
We’re back in the ABA, and to a team which somehow had six different head coaches in a six-year period of success.
Like happens occasionally in this list, the seasons where Kentucky saw playoff success aren’t the ones you’d necessarily expect. They had the best regular season in ABA history (68-16, +8 net rating), and lost in the first round of the playoffs. However, that season was sandwizhed between two Finals runs where they went 44-40 and 56-28 in the RS. They lost two Game 7s in those Finals, and even outscored the Pacers in ‘73, meaning this Dynastender run was reasonably close to becoming a Dynasty. However, they didn’t get to the 10-pont threshold until their actual championship season, with an impressive 12-3 playoff run including a convincing 5-game defeat of Indiana.

17. New York Nets, 1974-1976

Head Coach: Kevin Loughery
Key Players: Julius Erving, Brian Taylor, Billy Paultz, Larry Kenon
Dynastender Rankings: 21st-23rd in Seasons (3), 22nd in Points (10.14), 7th in adjusted Championships (1.13), 18th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.13), 13th in win% (.667), 4th in playoff win% (.656), 12th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.4), 20th in Top 5 aNR (+2.65)
Avg z-score: -0.49
Rounding out our ABA section is a short-but-sweet run of two titles in three years from Dr. J and the Nets. They also had a very impressive championship run at the start of their Dynastender, going 12-2 in the ‘74 playoffs. They then rounded out ABA history by beating the Nuggets in a six-game Finals in 1976.

16. Houston Rockets, 1993-1997

Head Coach: Rudy Tomjanovich
Key Players: Hakeem Olajuwon, Kenny Smith, Clyde Drexler, Mario Ellie, Otis Thorpe, Charles Barkley
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 12th in Points (17), 3rd in adjusted Championships (1.90), 12th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.90), 16th in win% (.646), 12th-13th in playoff win% (.593), 22nd in adjusted Net Rating (+2.4), 17th in Top 5 aNR (+3.3)
Avg z-score: -0.49
We’ve left the land of historical footnotes, and from this point on these teams will mostly be remembered by hard-core fans.
With Michael Jordan spending his time either playing baseball or losing a memory-holed second-round series to Orlando, the man picked ahead of him in the ‘84 draft took advantage of the power vacuum. He led Houston to two straight titles, including an empathic upset sweep over the aforementioned Magic. Then they tried forming a superteam with Barkley, but John Stockton and the Jazz ended their season, and it turns out their Dynastender.
Hakeem’s Rockets are stuck near ABA-land, with their biggest problem being their weak regular seasons (both in terms of net rating and win percentage, plus missed opportunities for Points). Their second championship, and the Points it gave them, does help, but it can only propel them so far when every other category is lacking.

15. Philadelphia 76ers, 1966-1969

Head Coach: Dolph Schayes, Alex Hannum, Jack Ramsay
Key Players: Wilt Chamberlain, Hal Greer, Chet Walker, Billy Cunningham
Dynastender Rankings: 17th-20th in Seasons (4), 21st in Points (10.67), 21st-22nd in adjusted Championships (0.58), 23rd in adjusted Finals appearances (0.58), 2nd in win% (.738), 21st in playoff win% (.526), 8th in adjusted Net Rating (+5.15), 15th in Top 5 aNR (+4.1)
Avg z-score: -0.41
This franchise enjoyed three full seasons of Wilt’s services, and took advantage; with a stupendous 185-58 regular season record (a 62-win pace), and a ‘67 season which ended the Celtics’ eight-peat of championships emphatically.
That season’s East Finals ended 4-1 in Philly’s favor, with the Sixers outscoring the Celtics by a total of 50 points. Both of those metrics (the three-game and 50-point margin) were franchise records for Celtics losses; the three-game margin wasn’t beaten until 1983, and the 50-point drubbing wouldn’t be topped until 2004. Beating the eight-time defending champs this badly is extremely impressive.
Still, the Sixers didn’t count as a Dynastender quite yet until 1969, when the remnants of the team were able to amass 55 wins with Wilt no longer in town.

14. Boston Celtics, 1972-1977

Head Coach: Tom Heinsohn
Key Players: John Havlicek, Dave Cowens, Jo Jo White, Paul Silas, Don Nelson, Don Chaney
Dynastender Rankings: 5th-8th in Seasons (6), 9th in Points (18.52), 5th in adjusted Championships (1.53), 16th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.53), 9th in win% (.687), 14th in playoff win% (.588), 20th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.1), 16th in Top 5 aNR (+4.05)
Avg z-score: -0.28
After the retirement of Bill Russell, the Celtics were nearly able to continue his Dynasty (spoiler alert!). 1970 was a dud, a sub-.500 season worth (approximately) -3 points. ‘71 was another playoff miss, but they finished over .500 (44-38), for -2 points. Boston finally got into the positive category in ‘72, but only for 2 points (56 wins and a conference finals loss), meaning that the Celtics satisfied criteria 4 for ending a dynasty (as ‘69 and ‘72 both had to be worth at least three points).
But while Russell’s Dynasty was over, a couple of the same players who were around for its twilight were able to put together a Dynastender on its coattails. Two championships and six seasons of success are both impressive, but other numbers are underwhelming. They have some distance between themselves and everyone below them, but their weak net rating and lack of a popping stat to make up for it keep them in the teens.

13. Cleveland Cavaliers, 2015-2018

Head Coach: David Blatt, Tyronn Lue
Key Players: LeBron James, Kevin Love, Tristan Thompson, Kyrie Irving
Dynastender Rankings: 17th-20th in Seasons (4), 10th-11th in Points (18), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 2nd-3rd in adjusted Finals appearances (4), 17th in win% (.643), 1st in playoff win% (.679), 16th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.45), 19th in Top 5 aNR (+2.8)
Avg z-score: -0.27
Of course, few people would think about this Cavs team in isolation; really, it’s a link in the chain of LeBron’s career, which is why I’ll be discussing him as the only player-centric Dynasty on the next list.
However, going through an exercise like this can help underline how special it is to make four Finals in a row. When we include era adjustments, only one other Dynastender that we’ll talk about beats 4 Finals appearances, and the only other one to match it is when LeBron did it with the Heat in the four previous seasons.
The one major asterisk everyone puts on this team is that the East was weak. That might be true, but it’s also overstated. Out of 133 Dynastender seasons, the Cavs’ strengths of schedule (per Basketball Reference) rank, in chronological order: 72th-75th, 97th-99th, 62nd, and 68th-69th. That’s nothing to particularly write home about (although the Cavs’ own weak point differentials meant they weren’t decreasing their own SOS as much as some other teams). Of 78 teams who lost in the conference finals since the 16-team playoff format started, the net rating of the Cavs’ ECF opponents ranked: 38th, 45th, 70th, 60th. Out of 156 second-round losers, Cleveland’s opponents ranked: 91st-92nd, 74th-77th, 55th-60th, and 9th. To be fair, these numbers would be a bit lower if you took SOS into account; but they’re not totally dismal.
In the big picture, it’s relatively rare for people to criticize the Raptors, or the Bucks, or the Big Three Celtics, or the Shaq-Wade Heat, because of a weak conference; even though all of these teams I mentioned have SOSs comparably bad as the Cavs throughout their Dynastender runs. But it was and is brought up over and over again for LeBron’s teams, because his teams were the only ones who were able to consistently benefit from the weak conference. People were complaining about the lack of competition in the East, because when you’re up against LeBron the standard is so much higher to meaningfully count as “competition”.
With all of that said, the Cavs’ weak regular seasons, combined with the fact that LeBron only stayed for four years, anchors them out of the top 10.

12. Toronto Raptors, 2016-2020

Head Coach: Dwane Casey, Nick Nurse
Key Players: Kyle Lowry, DeMar DeRozan, Jonas Valanciunas, Pascal Siakam, Kawhi Leonard
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 13th in Points (16), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 19th-21st in adjusted Finals appearances (1), 6th in win% (.693), 19th in playoff win% (.547), 6th in adjusted Net Rating (+5.4), 8th in Top 5 aNR (+5.4)
Avg z-score: -0.24
The Raptors are one of the weirdest entries in this series, as their run almost feels like three different ones.
The first chapter came as three consecutive solid regular seasons (56, 51 and 59 wins) that were all ended by the aforementioned Cavs. Then they traded for Kawhi Leonard and won a championship with him (A footnote title? Or not?), for the second, one-season chapter. Then they managed to unexpectedly have a great season in the COVID-interrupted 2019-20 campaign, including a 60-win pace and a narrow second-round loss, for one final, one-season chapter.
Putting all of the pieces together, this run registers as an impressive one as far as regular-season success goes, finishing 6th among Dynatenders for both regular-season win percentage and adjusted net rating. Playoff success was a different story, which the aforementioned LeBron series (two of which were sweeps) are mostly responsible for (plus the fact that many of their series wins were close, including their last three wins in ‘19).
This run is technically not officially over yet, but the Raptors would have to win the championship this season in order to extend it. Needless to say, that’s not very likely.

11. New York Knicks, 1969-1974

Head Coach: Red Holzman
Key Players: Walt Frazier, Willis Reed, Dave DeBusschere, Bill Bradley, Dick Barnett, Jerry Lucas, Earl Monroe
Dynastender Rankings: 5th-8th in Seasons (6), 8th in Points (18.6), 6th in adjusted Championships (1.44), 7th in adjusted Finals appearances (2.19), 15th in win% (.650), 11th in playoff win% (.593), 11th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.5), 11th in Top 5 aNR (+5.0)
Avg z-score: -0.20
The Knicks were terrible for most of the sixties, never even reaching a .400 win percentage from ‘60 to ‘66. New York had never won a championship, so when the late Willis Reed’s famous heroics helped them beat the Lakers in 1970, it was truly a new leaf to turn over for the club. That season was followed up by a third-straight 50-win season, and then two more consecutive Finals appearances, including another win in ‘73.

10. Milwaukee Bucks, 2019-present

Head Coach: Mike Budenholzer
Key Players: Giannis Antetokounmpo, Khris Middleton, Eric Bledsoe
Dynastender Rankings: 17th-20th in Seasons (4), 15th in Points (15), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 19th-21st in adjusted Finals appearances (1), 7th in win% (.689), 6th in playoff win% (.633), 3rd in adjusted Net Rating (+6.3), 10th in Top 5 aNR (+5.1)
Avg z-score: -0.10
The NBA’s only reigning Dynastender (that we know of) lands just inside the top ten. All of these numbers are only as of the end of last year, although the Bucks’ run is already confirmed as continuing another season (as they’ve gotten to 50 wins).
A pressing question, of course, might be how the Bucks’ ranking might change depending on their playoff results this year. It’s hard to project, because it depends on some specifics (like how their regular- and post-season records will shake out). However, if I change nothing but seasons/points/champs/finals to account for an NBA championship this season, the Bucks go up to #6 on this list (breaking into what’s currently a pretty solid top-6). Adjusting for a conference finals loss (adding one season and three points) would push them up two spots, to #8.
Looking at the profile of Milwaukee’s accomplishments so far, their net rating (3rd when adjusted for strength of schedule) is what sticks out to me the most. In fact, that’s an area where the Bucks will actually take a hit at the end of this season, because they’ve had a relatively underwhelming net rating this time around.

9. Los Angeles Lakers, 1962-1973

Head Coach: Fred Schaus, Butch van Breda Kolff, Joe Mullaney, Bill Sharman
Key Players: Jerry West, Elgin Baylor, Wilt Chamberlain, Gail Goodrich, Rudy LaRusso, Happy Hairston, Dick Barnett, Jim McMillian, Archie Clark
Dynastender Rankings: 1st in Seasons (12), 4th in Points (23.19), 17th-18th in adjusted Championships (0.75), 1st in adjusted Finals appearances (5.7), 21st in win% (.626), 18th in playoff win% (.552), 19th in adjusted Net Rating (+3.1), 7th in Top 5 aNR (+5.5)
Avg z-score: -0.04
The Lakers of Jerry West’s time represented a kind of dynasty of second-place finishes. Their nine Finals appearances in the 12-year run is incredible, although it’s adjusted down to 5.7 because of the number of teams in the league when they were accomplished.
These Lakers’ ability to contend for a long period of time is impressive, and if I did these rankings by Points alone, they’d be at #4 among Dynastenders on that strength. Weak regular seasons, though, prevent them from reaching thoe heights in my more complicated system.

8. Boston Celtics, 2008-2012

Head Coach: Doc Rivers
Key Players: Paul Pierce, Ray Allen, Kevin Garnett, Rajon Rondo
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 10th-11th in Points (18), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 9th-10th in adjusted Finals appearances (2), 5th in win% (.693), 15th in playoff win% (.581), 4th in adjusted Net Rating (+6.0), 3rd in Top 5 aNR (+6.0)
Avg z-score: -0.03
Known as a major step forward into the “superteam” era, the Big Three Celtics hit the ground running, posting their best season by far (67 wins and a title) in their first season together. As such, they’re the only NBA Dynastender to win a title in the first season of their run. Perhaps, that might be what contributes to this squad’s legacy; most teams have to build for a couple of years but the Big Three Celtics hit the ground running and made an immediate impression.
They had a chance to make a Dynasty out of it, but a Garnett injury hampered their chances in ‘09, and they couldn't pull out a Game 7 against the Lakers in ‘10. Great regular seasons propel the team into the top-10 Dynastenders, although the short length of the run and underwhelming playoff results limit how high they could rise.

7. Detroit Pistons, 2002-2008

Head Coach: Rick Carlisle, Larry Brown, Flip Saunders
Key Players: Chauncey Billups, Ben Wallace, Richard Hamilton, Tayshaun Prince, Rasheed Wallace, Jon Barry
Dynastender Rankings: 4th in Seasons (7), 3rd in Points (25), 14th in adjusted Championships (0.98), 11th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.98), 12th in win% (.669), 16th in playoff win% (.579), 10th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.8), 6th in Top 5 aNR (+5.7)
Avg z-score: 0.00
What really carries this Pistons team is their Point total, which is buoyed both by their longevity (7 seasons is a fairly good length for a run) and the streak of six straight conference finals appearances for which they are somewhat famous. Six straight three-point seasons (in the Dynasty Point system) has only been equalled by the Jazz (six straight), Russell Celtics (eight straight), and the Showtime Lakers (ten straight), so it’s a very impressive feat that’s worthy of putting the ‘00s Pistons in this kind of tier.
Because of how many deep runs the Pistons made, it’s not that hard to imagine a couple years going differently resulting in a Dynasty; like ‘05 (losing in Game 7 of the Finals), or ‘06/’08 (two six-game losses to the eventual champions).
Somewhat surprisingly, they don’t rank very highly in playoff win percentage, due to the fact that they won some surprisingly close series (like TOR ‘02, ORL ‘03, CLE ‘06) and lost a couple of lopsided ones (BOS ‘02, NJ ‘03).

6. Detroit Pistons, 1987-1991

Head Coach: Chuck Daly
Key Players: Bill Laimbeer, Dennis Rodman, Joe Dumars, Isiah Thomas, Adrian Dantley
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 5th in Points (21.68), 4th in adjusted Championships (1.86), 6th in adjusted Finals appearances (2.74), 11th in win% (.678), 3rd in playoff win% (.678), 9th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.9), 12th in Top 5 aNR (+4.9)
Avg z-score: 0.13
The second straight Pistons team on the list is the closest Dynastender to being on the Dynasty list. The ‘88 Finals ended with two very close games (that weren’t without controversy either), both of which could have won the Pistons the championship. Had they done so, and still won the next two, they would get the requisite three titles (in six or fewer seasons) for the Dynasty label. However, this team fails to resemble Dynasties in both number of championships and in length; every post-merger Dynasty lasted at least nine seasons by mysystem, where Detroit lasted only five. The Pistons got their two titles, got eclipsed by the Bulls, and disappeared.
Playoff success carries this run, as the Bad Boys nearly had as good of a win percentage in the second season as in the first. Unlike their ‘00s successors, they dominated series, winning 9 series by three games or more in this Dynastender run, losing only once by such a margin.

5. Dallas Mavericks, 2001-2011

Head Coach: Don Nelson, Avery Johnson, Rick Carlisle
Key Players: Dirk Nowitzki, Jason Terry, Steve Nash, Michael Finley, Erick Dampier, Josh Howard, Jason Kidd, Shawn Bradley, Tyson Chandler, Antawn Jamison
Dynastender Rankings: 2nd in Seasons (11), 2nd in Points (27), 8th-13th in adjusted Championships (1), 9th-10th in adjusted Finals appearances (2), 8th in win% (.687), 22nd in playoff win% (.512), 7th in adjusted Net Rating (+5.4), 2nd in Top 5 aNR (+7.0)
Avg z-score: 0.19
The Mavericks’ relative absence from the later rounds of the playoffs might have made you think that the 2011 team was a one-year wonder. However, that’s not the case. It was a year that topped off what was a very impressive run of success up to that point, at least in the regular season.
Every season in this run, Dallas had a record good enough to earn them points for my system (a 50-win pace). That’s 11 straight seasons, a very impressive feat that’s only been bettered by the Showtime Lakers, the Russell Celtics, and the Duncan Spurs. Dirk and co. were consistently good year in and year out, which is the driving force behind them making the top 5 of the Dynastender list.
Of course, what came between the Mavs and the very top of this list (or even a part of the Dynasty list) is a lack of playoff success. The playoff record (65-62) sticks out like a sore thumb, an atrocious 22nd out of 23 qualifying Dynastenders. The biggest symbol of said disappointment is the infamous series they lost to the 8-seed Warriors in 2007, following a 67-win regular season that featured an MVP from Nowitzki.
A disparity between regular season and playoff success that’s this large is really astounding, and the large sample calls into question the conventional analytic wisdom that the playoffs are basically just a noise-fest. Here are some highlights (or lowlights), as not everyone might know/remember much about Dallas’ playoff journey (I know I didn’t before researching):

• 2001: The Mavs overcome a big deficit at Utah in a decisive Game 5, but get destroyed by San Antonio in Round 2.
• 2002: A sweep against Minnesota, but a 5-game loss against the memorable ‘02 Kings team (including an OT Game 4 loss)
• 2003: Dirk gets injured during the WCF, and the Mavericks lose to the Spurs (although they benefitted from a Chris Weber injury the round before).
• 2004: Another loss to the Kings, this time in Round 1. Dallas misses two opportunities at the end of one-possession Games 4 and 5 to end the series.
• 2005: A comeback from a 2-0 deficit against McGrady and Yao’s Rockets, followed by an OT Game 6 loss at home to Phoenix to end the season (a Steve Nash three ties it with 6 seconds left, followed by a near-miss from Stackhouse at the buzzer).
• 2006: This run is fairly well-known, so I’ll ignore it.
• 2007: This one’s also pretty well-documented. It’ll also make you cry if you think about it enough.
• 2008: A convincing loss against Chris Paul and the Hornets in the first round.
• 2009: An impressive five-game win against the Spurs, followed by a five-game loss to Carmelo and the Nuggets, with three double-digit road losses and two close home games that the teams split (including a Carmelo game-winner after an uncalled intentional foul)
• 2010: Yet another series against the Spurs (the fifth in ten years); this one a 4-2 win for San Antonio as the 7-seed.

Dallas entered 2011 having lost in the first round three times in four years, and this long stretch of playoff failure made their great championship run all the sweeter.

4. Los Angeles Lakers, 2008-2012

Head Coach: Phil Jackson, Mike Brown
Key Players: Pau Gasol, Kobe Bryant, Lamar Odom, Andrew Bynum
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 6th-7th in Points (21), 1st-2nd in adjusted Championships (2), 5th in adjusted Finals appearances (3), 4th in win% (.703), 8th in playoff win% (.618), 5th in adjusted Net Rating (+5.8), 4th in Top 5 aNR (+5.8)
Avg z-score: 0.21
Fittingly, the Celtics and Lakers had Dynastenders spanning the exact same five seasons. The Lakers’ version gets the nod both because they won the 2010 matchup, and because the Lakers had more consistent postseason success, winning 62% of their playoff games (and making three Finals) to the Celtics’ 58% (and two).
There might be some quibbles about this run not being connected to the Shaqobe era, but the consensus seems to be in separating the two, and my system concurs (the ‘05-07 run of seasons is enough disappointment to put the kibosh on the initial Dynasty).

3. Philadelphia 76ers, 1977-1986

Head Coach: Gene Shue, Billy Cunningham, Matt Guokas
Key Players: Julius Erving, Maurice Cheeks, Bobby Jones, Moses Malone, Andrew Toney, Steve Mix, Charles Barkley, George McGinnis, Doug Collins
Dynastender Rankings: 3rd in Seasons (10), 1st in Points (30), 15th in adjusted Championships (0.88), 4th in adjusted Finals appearances (3.46), 10th in win% (.683), 9th in playoff win% (.603), 13th in adjusted Net Rating (+4.3), 5th in Top 5 aNR (+5.8)
Avg z-score: 0.28
Moses Malone’s “Fo Fo” Sixers only won one championship, but they had an extended period of relevance of which it was a part. In ten seasons, they made it to four NBA Finals and seven conference finals, only losing in the first round once. They also won 50 games in all but one season, the 47-win ‘79. In total, their 560 wins in these ten seasons ranked first in the league, with only two other teams (BOS 539, LAL 552) even getting to 500.
This team might slip through the cracks a bit, because apart from their one title, they’re often remembered in the contexts of their losses; they lost to Bill Walton’s Blazers, they lost to Magic’s iconic Game 6 performance, and they lost the 3-1 lead against the ‘81 Celtics. These Sixers had the definite potential for a Dynasty if a couple of these (or other) losses went the other way.
My Point system loves this team’s longevity and consistency, as can be seen from their top rank in that category. They only end up outside of the top spot on this list because there’s two other teams who were particularly excellent over smaller periods of time.

2. Milwaukee Bucks, 1970-1974

Head Coach: Larry Costello
Key Players: Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Bob Dandridge, Oscar Robertson, Jon McGlocklin, Lucius Allen, Flynn Robinson
Dynastender Rankings: 9th-16th in Seasons (5), 14th in Points (15.66), 17th-18th in adjusted Championships (0.75), 17th in adjusted Finals appearances (1.51), 1st in win% (.741), 7th in playoff win% (.632), 1st in adjusted Net Rating (+7.6), 1st in Top 5 aNR (+7.6)
Avg z-score: 0.31
Of the teams you were anticipating on this list, the ‘70s Bucks might not have been one of them. They were from the “dark ages” of the ‘70s that everybody forgets about. There’s a chance that you knew they had a great ‘71 season, but not much else.
However, these Bucks had a heck of a run. They hit the ground running their first season without Kareem, immediately winning 56 games, losing in the Division Finals. Then followed one of the greatest seasons of all time, where they posted a net-rating record that wouldn’t be broken for 21 years (and their aNR still hasn’t been beaten by a non-Dynasty), and dominated the postseason to boot. ‘72 was the Lakers’ year, but the Bucks were still nothing to sneeze at; 63 wins and a second-straight double-digit net rating (only the ‘15-17 Warriors and ‘96-97 Bulls can boast the same). Not only that, but they actually outscored the Lakers in their playoff series that year! ‘73 saw a disappointing first-round upset loss to Golden State (in which the Bucks also scored more points), but after a third-straight 60-win season (another feat only Dynasties share). Finally, the Bucks narrowly missed what would have been the NBA’s only four-season streak of 60+ wins (they won 59), and an iconic Kareem shot forced a seventh NBA Finals game which they ended up losing.
I was originally as puzzled by the Bucks’ high ranking as you all might have been, but actually going back and breaking down all of their seasons has sold me on them. 304 regular-season wins over a five-year period is incredible, and they were just a few playoff games away from a Dynasty that would’ve potentially been remembered among the best.

1. Miami Heat, 2011-2014

Head Coach: Erik Spoelstra
Key Players: LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh
Dynastender Rankings: 17th-20th in Seasons (4), 6th-7th in Points (21), 1st-2nd in adjusted Championships (2), 2nd-3rd in adjusted Finals appearances (3.46), 3rd in win% (.718), 2nd in playoff win% (.678), 2nd in adjusted Net Rating (+6.4), 9th in Top 5 aNR (+5.1)
Avg z-score: 0.38
While this team isn’t the closest on this list to being a Dynasty (the Pistons are), in some ways they might be the team that feels like a dynasty the most, or that most had the aura that many dynasties share.
From the moment Miami’s Big 3 was official, everyone knew it was the Heat against the world. LeBron infamously made a tongue-in-cheek allusion to a mega-dynasty, and it was up to everyone else to try to stop it. The fact that this run has an air of disappointment about its final results, despite four Finals and two rings in four tries, is almost the biggest testament there is. Out of 16 playoff series, they only lost twice to two very good teams, but it’s still not quite good enough, precisely because this team was so good that perfection was their standard.
The Heat are a good example of the upside of my final ranking system, and its general favoritism towards short but great runs. Now that I’m looking at the list, it would feel a little wrong for the Heat to be 6th-7th, and not even make the top 5 Dynastenders, as would be the case if I went on Points alone. Yes, they only lasted for four years, but the way they defined the NBA for that stretch goes beyond most other Dynastenders.
We could, perhaps, touch on how much of a footnote 2012 should be, where there could be some arguments back and forth. On the one hand, I don’t really believe in footnotes based on shortened regular-seasons (at least in the NBA’s cases, where we were still left with decent regular seasons that were >half of a normal one), and also history bore out that Derrick Rose getting injured was more of a norm than an exception. On the other hand, the ECF we got was pretty close, which could lead one to wonder whether Chicago with home court could have tipped the balance in the other direction.